Socializing  Female acquaintance is slut shaming a girl who likes me... through Memes?!

Kai Reyder

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
12
TL;WR: A girl who likes me is being slut shamed by another girl from my social circle. She is even making / distributing memes about her (being a slut, manipulative, dishonest; the men she dates being gullible) to my gay friend. I'm curious about your opinions.

Hey all! Been following the site for a while, but consider me new here. Something has been bugging me recently, so I thought I'd come here, give you the context, and hear your opinions. I have no experience with girls, so try to bear with me.

First, the context. I want to offer enough details so that I could get better advice, but it may be a bit rambly, so forgive me if that is the case. Anyway...

A few weeks ago I met a very attractive and sexual girl (friend of a female "friend" of mine... well, more of a close acquaintance, really) who took a liking to me. From my recollection of our intimate conversations I learned that:
  • she is quite sexually experienced,
  • she has cheated on two of her boyfriends (her always being the one to end the relationship),
  • enjoyed the party lifestyle and leading men on,
  • and is looking to settle down (though she is in her very early twenties), not being interested in short term flings anymore.
(If Hector reads this, he will probably facepalm: "Why would she tell me that other men could get her for nothing, while I'm expected to commit for the pussy?!" Same here bro. I kinda felt offended, but whatever.)
I've always presented myself as a non-judgemental individual, even somewhat rebellious, so that's why I believe she felt comfortable revealing such intimate details to me. And I try to find the innocence and inner beauty in all women, Zan Perrion style. And God, I do find her both incredibly hot and extraordinarily beautiful, despite her history. Or maybe I'm just a hopeless, inexperienced cuck-in-the-making. You decide.
During our last conversation several nights ago, we parted amicably (though she cried a bit, saying that it doesn't feel nice being on the receiving end of the break-up talk, for once). She wants to settle down, is sick of partying, while I haven't even begun. We both realised that we are simply not right for one another at this time, if ever. Nothing happened between us, not even a kiss, except the parting one when I kissed her forehead and left her apartment.

With that sappy shit out of the way, let's get to the meat and potatoes of this post.

Last night I went out for a couple of beers with a few friends of mine, the slut shaming girl in question, and her boyfriend. Somehow, the "Slut", as I will call the girl for ease of understanding, became the subject of discussion. It's possible that she was brought up by the "Shamer", or the gay friend, but I cannot recall.
Anyway, the Shamer said that she cannot respect the Slut as she had seen the Slut's ass in a video (dancing or something, I don't know).
My initial idea was that the Shamer was presenting herself as such in order to appear as a "good girl" in front of her boyfriend. That theory, however, seems off in view of recent events.
My gay friend (close friends, we spend a lot of time together) showed me actual memes mocking the Slut and the men that get involved with her, that the Shamer had sent him. I don't know if she is making, or just distributing them. In any case, the Shamer seems to be working full-time to drive the Slut's reputation into the ground, and I'm confused because I've never seen anything like this before. Fucking MEMES, bro! Really?!

And now I'm really confused. A girl shows a hint of interest in me, and I get absolutely barraged by in-your-face insinuations of the girl's lack of value from another girl. I'm lucky to have developed a rather firm and rebellious mind in the last few years, or this would significantly alter my perception of the Slut. Still, it has affected me enough to decide to write here and ask for your opinions.
So tell me, what do you think?

Why did the Slut even develop feelings for me (if she even did, and isn't just playing a game)?
Why is the Shamer trying so hard to ruin the Slut's reputation? SMV, probably? But she's got a boyfriend who is much cooler and more attractive than me, imo, so that makes very little sense.
Why was I not sent any memes (if they existed before now) or heard gossip about the Slut's reputation before I got involved with her?

Did something like this happen to any of you before?

Help me out here, because I am confused as fuck right now. If you have any questions, ask away.

Thanks!
Kai
 

BigPapa

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jan 12, 2020
Messages
601
Maybe the shamer boyfriend told the shamer that he thinks she is cute or something , and she tries to drop down her value as she finds her as a potential threat to her relationship :)

or maybe the shamer really considers you a friend and knows that you like the slut , and just tries to open your eyes , as savage as it sounds . Women are a little bit crazy in general

I would go with option 1 though :)

regards to the slut , I would not think too much about her , she is clearly no relationship material . Maybe a bang if you do not have to put too much energy
 

Kai Reyder

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
12
Maybe the shamer boyfriend told the shamer that he thinks she is cute or something , and she tries to drop down her value as she finds her as a potential threat to her relationship :)

or maybe the shamer really considers you a friend and knows that you like the slut , and just tries to open your eyes , as savage as it sounds . Women are a little bit crazy in general

I would go with option 1 though :)

regards to the slut , I would not think too much about her , she is clearly no relationship material . Maybe a bang if you do not have to put too much energy

Hey! Thanks for the reply, Big!

I'm not too sure about option 1, as the boyfriend is not really part of any social circle where he could meet this girl. But I could be wrong, of course.

I'm actually more inclined towards option 2. The Shamer did throw a few compliments my way (as did the other girl) so she could be just looking out for me. Apparently, I'm very intelligent (or so they told me) so she probably wouldn't want me to get caught up in this girl's web.

And regarding this girl, yeah we've established that there will be no relationship. And as far as just bedding her is concerned... she claims she's done hooking up, and I will honor that. I'm not desperate enough to try and wear her down so that she would sleep with me. I'm sure there are enough girls around who would be perfectly willing to have me fuck them and with whom it would require less effort.

Still though... fucking memes man.
Has anything this bizarre happened to you?
 

BigPapa

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jan 12, 2020
Messages
601
Not with memes , but I can share with you a story just as crazy :)

I was at a wedding , and one of my exes from long time ago wanted to sit at the same table as me , she insisted.
I went solo , as i just broke up with my Latina girlfriend and needed some time off from women in general , they tend to wear me down after a while .

so at this wedding , I tried to flirt with one of the singers , she sees me and cockblocks me hard . Then after a while One of my best friends sends me print screens from his discussion with one of her best friends where she was sending pictures of me , like look with whom I was sitting at the table , making fun of her boyfriend ( they got married in the meantime ) that he does not know that we used to date at some point , and laughing that her future husband is friendly with me . The fucked up thing is that this friend of mine is not that close to her best friend , so in my mind I think they did this on purpose . This is how girls are . I feel sorry for the poor guy who married her to be frank :)

her attitude towards me ? Being friendly , but in the same time trying to look cool like by saying things like “ you are touching me “ , Bla bla . At some point seeing that I am social with her future husband she started joking like “ he is marrying me , do not try to steal him from me “ , and of course she started a fight with him just to show me how much a femme fatale she is giving him an ultimatum like “ either you do it like that , or you are going alone home tonight “ .

To be frank , I cheated her , and kinda fucked up with her head and still has a lot of emotional luggage from me , and maybe it was just her trying to show me what a Tough girls she is now

kinda fucked up if you think about it :)
 
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BigPapa

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Jan 12, 2020
Messages
601
Also option 3 might be that the shamer relationship might be on the rocks and she might consider you as an option when it ends , so basically she is fighting over you with the slut :)

when Women do slut shamming it is mainly because they want to devaluate the mate value of a woman . To be frank option 2 is the last of the these 3 haha , unless she is super emphatic and you 2 are very close friendship wise
 

Kai Reyder

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jan 26, 2020
Messages
12
That story... good Lord. The mad shit some people are willing to do for some good dick / pussy / attention, eh?

As to the matter of her being interested in me? Her boyfriend and I do share a few physical similarities, so it may be a possibility, but I'd rather pass on that (though she is attractive). I'd prefer to "operate" outside of my social circle. I am surely one of the least experienced men on these boards, but I do believe that I have an unreasonable level of abundance mentality. In any case, I don't need that shit. Pass.

Anyway, thanks for the replies, Big. You have helped me clear my thoughts a bit.
See you around, hopefully ;)
 

BigPapa

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jan 12, 2020
Messages
601
Well she does not know that you will not date her if you would have the chance , She works only with the information she has , and by definition the information is always imperfect :)

best of luck in whatever your are doing and if you want to share with us your thoughts or questions do not shy away . Have a good one !
 

Michal

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Jul 5, 2013
Messages
278
It has been my experience that women tell that stuff (done with hook ups, finding true love, done partying, settle down and have kids) as they ultimately know they are not that high in terms of wife material. And at the same time see you as a long term relationship material or even husband material. I do not remember how it came up, I just know it was sudden, out of nowhere in the discussion.. but my last gf said that she never cheated on anyone. Later there were other signs like this, which she said to cover that she has been with like 60 guys. And how she cheated on one of her boyfriends. Not to mention before it because somewhat serious between us, she slept with this boyfriend couple of times, one new guy and another friend of hers from long ago. Point being, women try to level themselves and bend over in different ways if they want something. The problem usually is that they just cannot control themselves and what they want rationally gets discarded because the emontions drive them more. Like cocaine addicts in a sense. They might want to end and get clean. But when they feel that urge, sooner or later they just give in and take another.

Also, I have begin to notice there is another thing at play. Which is the way the girl perceives how experienced with all this woman shit you are. When they get a read on you, how experienced you are.. and then play at that level with stuff like that - shaming and games I mean (if it makes sense). Like with me, earlier in my years of this journey, they just said things directly (I never cheated, I would never do X, I am not Z, etc). The last one (the 60 fills up one) said she misjudged me after we had a talk. And for like the first time in couple of months, that evening I saw her true self, without any armor. She was really free and it was quite nice tbh.
The girls who kinda see beneath the surface of my facade are more sneaky about this. They do stuff like this in this post but a bit less obvious sometimes. They try to devalue other girls in more subtle ways. Like critising her (by her I mean a girl I fancy who seems to fancy me back) style lets say, or pointing out that she does not dress like that normally, that she must like me if she dresses in a way that I like. But then she adds this annex like "she will drop that once she has you and dress like a wagabond again". The problem was the voice tone she used. I dunno how to describe it but it just gave her away. Or a girl would tell me about another girl how she is never on time, that her future husband is not a lucky guy. And laugh as they say that to mask it. To sum this part, I am not saying just because a girl says these thing it means she wants to devalue another girl. Sometimes they know each other and tease themselves this way.

Anyways to sum this up, for me at least, women say no hook up, want a family because they see me as a LTR material and "a good guy".
Other girls slut shame in more subtle ways if they get a read on that I am not w chump and understand women to a deeper level the a regular "good guy"
 
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