FU  3 in one day godamnit.....

maximus6004

Cro-Magnon Man
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Jan 28, 2014
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369
Here are three fuck ups from today and im.so.stupid for dping them but will learn from the experience. I never lose either I win, or I learn.... and today , I learned many times.

First FU. Snails pace.

So this girl, I messed up with because I moved way to.slow I couldnt decide what I wanted from her. So I moved slow and tip toed around her and she lost attraction kind of not really sure what to do with this one but walk away as she tried to friend zone me.

Yesterday I text her and said you know what, im not happy with the interaction its not your fault I became a little bitch and its best we just go seperate ways.

Her"im not going to fuck you, I put myself out there for you and I feel.like you turned me down."

Me"didnt mean to do that, but honestly, im going.to move on its best for both of us"

Her"lets just be friends and stop being a drama queen"

Me"im not going to be just friends with you? Its past that sorry no thanks"

So I see her today and I just looked at her and said good morning she replied the same then asked.me.if.I was done.being a drama.queen.

Me"nope guess not"

She grabs me as I walk away and pulls me to her and whispers in my ear, I need you to just stop and be my friend."

Me"naw, im good im not going to go sit in the friend zone attracted to you and then you call.me.only when you need something. Im good"

Her"fine" didnt look happy about this..... meh walked away

Second girl older woman

Me"hey, so you looked good today havent seen you in awhile"
Her"thanks" then ranted on about her divorce I tried to change the subject but she wouldnt let me.cut in so I text her because I had to go

Me"hey lets grab a coffee soon"

Her"im not going to be another notch on your belt I heard you have slept with a lot of flight attendants"

Me"yea, to be honest they all bragged about it I believe in discretion"

Her"we can be just friends"

Really, again in an hour two girls tried to friend zone me.... common now man you are better than this.....

Me"no thanks"

Her"wow thats pretty closed minded of you"

Me" how so?"

Her" so "I dont want to date you, so you delete my number and move on?" Fine your loss"

Me"no more like "I dont want to be the guy in the friendzone ayttacted to yo, and only getting a call when you need something" no, no thanks"

And nothing from her.

Third girl why werent the flights open damnit

So this girl and I hit it off awhile back flirting was amazing and we just vibed. She was going to fly out and see me and the flights overbooked and standby and flying no bueno. So she couldnt make it and radio silence ensumed..... she faded away very fast after that and then didnt respond to my text messages. Which could only.mean cold feet, found someone, or heard im a whore or all the above as she told me she wasnt that kind of girl I was looking for. So I stopped talking.to her said hey here and there thats it and then today happens.

Me"hey morning"

Her"morning how" I walked out of the area and came back

Me"whats up"

Her"nothing you?"

Me"eh another day"

Was perfectly content with just walking away then she started touching me, and then asked for a hug and was starting.to chase me again.hard. at this point no way to tell if she just wants the attention or if she really is chasing not sure yet. She is cute though

Hope yall enjoyed my day of Fu. Im waiting for the next day to roll around in pretty much over this day. However cant enjoy the good days without the bad.
 

lao che

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Apr 21, 2013
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Re: FU 3 in one day godamnit.....

hard to see how these are really fuckups... i mean, being a little bit bitchy in the first one. not sure sending that first message was a good idea. i would have just left it completely. sounds a little bit like a pre-emptive strike on your behalf. i try not to do that and i'm often surprised by girls hitting me up several days or weeks after i assumed i'd blown it.
her answer was interesting though. almost sounds like she's opening the door one more time. and then whispering to you 'stop and be my friend' .... hmmm i mean the way it's written makes you look a little, childish is the wrong word .. might have been better to take the high road - sexy smile and: "sure we can be friends ..." walk away.
i guess you're colleagues? at least give her some warmth after she opened up to you. you don't actually have to be her friend. just be civil.

sorry if this is blunt, or totally off. just going on my feelings from what you wrote. i guess you're about 25 ... am i close? haven't read any other of your reports



second one "i'm not gonna be a notch ...."

"yea, to be honest they all bragged about it I believe in discretion" at first glance this seems pretty good but on second thoughts it basically you admitting the gossip is true. a better response might have been "i don't pay attention to rumours. i'm just talking coffee" or playfully accuse her of being a gossip-monger and tell her she better not blab about you two having coffee together.


with both these girls you seem way to black-and-white and almost like a child spitting out his dummy (pacifier) like "you're not gonna fuck me? well fuck you, then. don't fucking talk to me" that's the vibe i'm getting. again, i'm only going by your original post and my own feelings. maybe i'm way off.


third one seems fine. no fuckup there
 

maximus6004

Cro-Magnon Man
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Jan 28, 2014
Messages
369
Re: FU 3 in one day godamnit.....

Yea, thats where I fucked up I let my.emotions get to me and let it control. Thats where I fucked up exactly qhere your points were. Yes 25 good guess. I dont know why I let it get to me. I was acting.childish and.im.kicking myself.for.it. thats why I pist these because I like to see better ways to.handle it. Of course I do this every once in awhile and just go fuck the world middle fingers blazing. Their is no excuse for this and I am.working on it and a little more thanks for the comments. Please always be as blunt as possible. It sucks to hear however how else will we learn to become better.

Really appreciate the advice man thank you!
 

maximus6004

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Jan 28, 2014
Messages
369
Re: FU 3 in one day godamnit.....

I think what happened was that because ive been having such bad luck with everything.... well not bad luck.just a slow period I got.frustrated. im actually not.sad about the first two girls.anymore.because.both of them went around.showing the text messages to.all the other girls and.I really dont.need.that in.my.life. however, you are right gotta keep my.cool sometimes.it.just doesnt.happen that way. If.it was perfect I.wouldn't be here. Man im stupid sometimes lol smh.
 

Chase

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Staff member
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Oct 9, 2012
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Maximus-

Agreed with Lao Che. Also, one critique on how you can handle these differently:

maximus6004 said:
She grabs me as I walk away and pulls me to her and whispers in my ear, I need you to just stop and be my friend."

Me"naw, im good im not going to go sit in the friend zone attracted to you and then you call.me.only when you need something. Im good"

Her"fine" didnt look happy about this..... meh walked away

This was an opportunity - like Lao Che pointed out, she was basically saying, "I want you to be my 'friend' - *wink wink*."

I realize you did not want to say, "Okay, I'll be your friend *wink wink*," and then it's kind of ambiguous and maybe she treats it like a friend zone friend after all instead of a 'friend' she's going to sleep with.

However, instead of just shoot her down, you can use a barrier:

  • Her: (whispering into your ear) I need you to just stop and be my friend.

    You: (whispering back) You know... I'd like to, but I'm just not any good at keeping my hands and other parts of my anatomy to myself around pretty female friends. I wouldn't want to insult your notion of friendship if something taboo happened between us that friends should never do...

Now the barrier's set, and she has an easy path to hurdle over it: just tell you that's okay, and she won't complain about anything sexual happening in your 'friendship' if you won't.

maximus6004 said:
Me"hey lets grab a coffee soon"

Her"im not going to be another notch on your belt I heard you have slept with a lot of flight attendants"

Here's another one where barriers can be used to great effect:

  • You: You're right, I don't want to be a bad influence on you. You need nobler, more upstanding men in your life, far less crude and debased than I. I don't blame you for wanting to stay away from me... there's a good chance I'd only ruin you for other, nicer men.

Instead of thinking, "Let me shoot these girls down and tell them, 'There, see! That's what you're missing out on! Too bad!'" which feels kinda good, you can use a barrier instead, and then you're effectively saying, "Yeah, well, you probably wouldn't want me on the only terms you can have me, which is messy and sexy and multiorgasmic and not nice-guy-ish at all," and then either they're going to say, "Yes, that's far too terrible for me," or they're going to say, "You know what? Actually that sounds okay," and either way you win.

Chase
 

maximus6004

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 28, 2014
Messages
369
Thank you Chase. Im going to start putting this into effect right away.

This should up my game a lot
 
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