FR A mixed day

[John92]

So today I tried indirect approaches and they failed badly. I ejected from 4 strong hooks because I got brainfreeze smh. I'm not feeling going indirect for daygame and street game.

I did a throwaway approach to in order to warmup which I instantly regretted lol. She received my compliment very well and when I said have a nice rest of your day and ejected, she touched my hand.

The highlight approach was when I approached a hot young American girl from the South and it was the last approach. Man, she was so warm and social, it was so refreshing and made me feel instantly happier. She was like a beacon of light in darkness lol. I told her "you're walking so fast, its as if you're running from the police" and she liked that. She introduced herself and she held my hand for longer than usual (60yoc handshake).

She was peppering me with questions throughout. I was thinking in the back of my mind that I have to start screening and qualifiying. I asked her "so apart from chatting up men on the street, what do you do for fun?" and when she answered with something I liked, I qualified her on it and stroked her arm while doing that. After that, she asked me out and we exchanged numbers.

I don't know what it is but in general American's seem to be much more friendly and social compared to Brits.

 

[John92]

I'm going to try an opener that @Skills suggested for daygame. It goes You have an interesting/lovely/intriguing vibe about you..pause and let her soak it in then...and i'm wondering if your looks match your personality. I like it, not really direct nor indirect. Also, i'm going to try and focus on slowing down my voice and talk more seductively. Basically applying Gutwitch SECT.

Now I know @Skills will not like my preopeners "excuse me" and "can I tell you something?" but i've found they work well in London.

 

[Skills]

I'm going to try an opener that @Skills suggested for daygame. It goes You have an interesting/lovely/intriguing vibe about you..pause and let her soak it in then...and i'm wondering if your looks match your personality. I like it, not really direct nor indirect. Also, i'm going to try and focus on slowing down my voice and talk more seductively. Basically applying Gutwitch SECT.

Now I know @Skills will not like my preopeners "excuse me" and "can I tell you something?" but i've found they work well in London.

I think that is from topcat

 

[gameboy]

I think the forum consensus was "excuse me" works well in europe, but apparently not in the US.

 

[John922]

Had to open this account because my post limit on the other account has annoyingly been reached and I don't want to wait 24hrs.

Ghosted yet again! I shouldn't expect anything else. Smh getting sick of this. See guys, how am I supposed to do anything when she is not willing to do the seduction dance with me? This has been the story for the last two months. I'm a prisoner of flake/ghost city.

29/09/2026, 21:24 - A: Hey! Random but nice to meet you tonight, are you always so friendly to new people?!
30/09/2026, 12:47 - Her: Hey A yes, why wouldn’t I?
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Because this time it was a random man approaching you on the street, maybe it was because of me or you were just in a good mood
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Just curious, what are your two best qualities which have nothing to do with your appearance?
30/09/2026, 16:14 - Her: How was I supposed to react?
30/09/2026, 16:21 - A: I think when a man approaches a girl confidently and respectfully, the reaction should be positive
30/09/2026, 17:07 - Her: You see, you know the answer
30/09/2026, 18:26 - A: But I don't know your answer to this question yet (Just curious...)

 

[isildur1]

What’s your social media like ? How’s your instagram? Have you got good photos ? Having good photos helped reduce my flakes

don’t go just for the WhatsApp alone

 

[John922]

What’s your social media like ? How’s your instagram? Have you got good photos ? Having good photos helped reduce my flakes

don’t go just for the WhatsApp alone

That isn't a solution. You'll just join 1000s of others in her inbox.

I guess it's escorts or inceldom Wow modern dating in London, what a trip! Somehow i'm in the same boat as guys that don't even cold approach smh. To say i'm mad is an understatement.

 

[isildur1]

That isn't a solution. You'll just join 1000s of others in her inbox.

I guess it's escorts or inceldom Wow modern dating in London, what a trip! Somehow i'm in the same boat as guys that don't even cold approach smh. To say i'm mad is an understatement.

For me it worked - 95 percent of my closes were through Instagram or WeChat - her seeing my photos helped to prove I wasn’t some weirdo on the street and had friends in real life - majority of my wings used Instagram to close too not WhatsApp - nowadays insta DMs or WeChat is what gen z use over WhatsApp- with Koreans it’s kakaotalk and Middle Eastern women- snapchat/ instagram

you don’t join the 1000s others in her inbox if she follows you back and makes a connection with you in the interaction

 

[John922]

For me it worked - 95 percent of my closes were through Instagram or WeChat - her seeing my photos helped to prove I wasn’t some weirdo on the street and had friends in real life - majority of my wings used Instagram to close too not WhatsApp - nowadays insta DMs or WeChat is what gen z use over WhatsApp- with Koreans it’s kakaotalk and Middle Eastern women- snapchat/ instagram

you don’t join the 1000s others in her inbox if she follows you back and makes a connection with you in the interaction

Bro life is trolling me enough, I don't need your trolling too

 

[isildur1]

I

Bro life is trolling me enough, I don't need your trolling too

Im not trolling- I’m saying what might be the problem- you appear to be closing a lot on WhatsApp and getting a lot of flakes yet if anyone offers a solution you just dismiss it- im just offering what worked for me personally and a common weakness on seducers who got a lot of flakes was weak social media. A lot of them had next to no photos or one or two shitty photos for me it was one of my sticking points that once I fixed I saw a reduction of flakes and quite a few Women have even admitted that they stalked my social media before agreeing to date me

And yeah I follow some of the successful skilled seducer members on Instagram a common strength of there’s is they have very good social media profiles that could be a contributing factor to their success amongst other things

 

[gameboy]

Had to open this account because my post limit on the other account has annoyingly been reached and I don't want to wait 24hrs.

Ghosted yet again! I shouldn't expect anything else. Smh getting sick of this. See guys, how am I supposed to do anything when she is not willing to do the seduction dance with me? This has been the story for the last two months. I'm a prisoner of flake/ghost city.

29/09/2026, 21:24 - A: Hey! Random but nice to meet you tonight, are you always so friendly to new people?!
30/09/2026, 12:47 - Her: Hey A yes, why wouldn’t I?
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Because this time it was a random man approaching you on the street, maybe it was because of me or you were just in a good mood
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Just curious, what are your two best qualities which have nothing to do with your appearance?
30/09/2026, 16:14 - Her: How was I supposed to react?
30/09/2026, 16:21 - A: I think when a man approaches a girl confidently and respectfully, the reaction should be positive
30/09/2026, 17:07 - Her: You see, you know the answer
30/09/2026, 18:26 - A: But I don't know your answer to this question yet (Just curious...)

That's some weird texting, to be honest. I'm by no means an expert, but it feels like you're calling her out for being nice to you. Then you randomly ask her the 2 best qualities question without any context.

An ideal mindset would be: Of course she is nice to you because you were just that kind of charming and social guy, and she's into you.

 

[Will_V]

Had to open this account because my post limit on the other account has annoyingly been reached and I don't want to wait 24hrs.

Ghosted yet again! I shouldn't expect anything else. Smh getting sick of this. See guys, how am I supposed to do anything when she is not willing to do the seduction dance with me? This has been the story for the last two months. I'm a prisoner of flake/ghost city.

29/09/2026, 21:24 - A: Hey! Random but nice to meet you tonight, are you always so friendly to new people?!
30/09/2026, 12:47 - Her: Hey A yes, why wouldn’t I?
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Because this time it was a random man approaching you on the street, maybe it was because of me or you were just in a good mood
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Just curious, what are your two best qualities which have nothing to do with your appearance?
30/09/2026, 16:14 - Her: How was I supposed to react?
30/09/2026, 16:21 - A: I think when a man approaches a girl confidently and respectfully, the reaction should be positive
30/09/2026, 17:07 - Her: You see, you know the answer
30/09/2026, 18:26 - A: But I don't know your answer to this question yet (Just curious...)

Dude, you kept drawing her attention back to the fact that you two don't know eachother, and kept pressing her to try and rationalize why she talked to you at all. Over text.

Way to shoot yourself in the foot brother! How did you think this would make her feel?

Plus you're trying to game her over text, asking about her best qualities. That is what you do during an approach, when emotions are high and she's enjoying it. Not over text when you're not there and she's probably distracted by all kinds of other stuff. Text is for some light banter and then setting up the date.

 

[John922]

Dude, you kept drawing her attention back to the fact that you two don't know eachother, and kept pressing her to try and rationalize why she talked to you at all. Over text.

Way to shoot yourself in the foot brother! How did you think this would make her feel?

Plus you're trying to game her over text, asking about her best qualities. That is what you do during an approach, when emotions are high and she's enjoying it. Not over text when you're not there and she's probably distracted by all kinds of other stuff. Text is for some light banter and then setting up the date.

I'm going to keep it very simple from now on. No more trying to be flirty or cocky over text. Just light banter and then setting up the date as you mentioned.

The icebreaker is from Tom Torero's book Street Hustle.

 

[Will_V]

I'm going to keep it very simple from now on. No more trying to be flirty or cocky over text. Just light banter and then setting up the date as you mentioned.

The icebreaker is from Tom Torero's book Street Hustle.

Don't forget to read this texting article.

 

[Will_V]

@John922 by the way, I don't think there was anything wrong with the icebreaker text, though it's not one I'd personally use:

Hey! Random but nice to meet you tonight, are you always so friendly to new people?!

The implication here is that she was extra nice to you because she liked you, which is good framing.

The problem is that you kept hammering at it and it became almost an interrogation, like she'd done something wrong. And you suddenly switched to asking her qualities, and then went back to asking her why she was so friendly.

It's a confusing way to be talked to by a stranger, and probably felt weird/gamey.

Anyway, you're qualifying her and getting solid numbers which is great, now to improve texting.

 

[kevkev39]

Had to open this account because my post limit on the other account has annoyingly been reached and I don't want to wait 24hrs.

Ghosted yet again! I shouldn't expect anything else. Smh getting sick of this. See guys, how am I supposed to do anything when she is not willing to do the seduction dance with me? This has been the story for the last two months. I'm a prisoner of flake/ghost city.

29/09/2026, 21:24 - A: Hey! Random but nice to meet you tonight, are you always so friendly to new people?!
30/09/2026, 12:47 - Her: Hey A yes, why wouldn’t I?
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Because this time it was a random man approaching you on the street, maybe it was because of me or you were just in a good mood
30/09/2026, 15:58 - A: Just curious, what are your two best qualities which have nothing to do with your appearance?
30/09/2026, 16:14 - Her: How was I supposed to react?
30/09/2026, 16:21 - A: I think when a man approaches a girl confidently and respectfully, the reaction should be positive
30/09/2026, 17:07 - Her: You see, you know the answer
30/09/2026, 18:26 - A: But I don't know your answer to this question yet (Just curious...)

Yeah so.... First off, it's been like 4 days, dude. That hardly counts as ghost town territory.

Second, I prefer calling out a specific thing about the girl that I liked. Found it works well. "Hey, nice meeting you earlier. You seem like a fun, adventurous kind of girl. A woman after my own heart." (Adapt as needed, ofc)

Third, People get busy and overwhelmed and can just forget to reply. I personally keep my circle & volume small, specifically because the last time I went out specifically to get a bunch of numbers, I was totally overwhelmed in the morning. Sure it feels good to wake up to a dozen messages and have your pick of whoever you want, but imagine that was happening to you every single day x 1,000 - now you're in her shoes. Just message her again.

If she likes you, she'll respond.
If she likes you but she doesn't know what to say, she'll leave you on read but not block you.
If she doesn't really care, she'll leave you unread.
If she's an 8 story tall creature from the Paleozoic era, she'll ask you for $3.50.

 

[John92]

@John922 by the way, I don't think there was anything wrong with the icebreaker text, though it's not one I'd personally use:



The implication here is that she was extra nice to you because she liked you, which is good framing.

The problem is that you kept hammering at it and it became almost an interrogation, like she'd done something wrong. And you suddenly switched to asking her qualities, and then went back to asking her why she was so friendly.

It's a confusing way to be talked to by a stranger, and probably felt weird/gamey.

Anyway, you're qualifying her and getting solid numbers which is great, now to improve texting.

Thanks for the feedback, I really appreciate it.

Yes, bad texting is costing me. Thanks for sending me the link to Girls Chase texting article. That should help clear up the problems with my texting.

I think me trying to set chase frames and being cocky trying to DHV myself over text is hurting me. The girls probably see me as an arrogant dude giving off player vibes.

I think the icebreaker from Tom Torero's book Street Hustle is not bad, but it contains a question and the Girls Chase article on texting advises against asking a question in the icebreaker text.

As for qualifying, I followed yours and @topcat advice on that and yes it has definitely made a difference in how solid my sets are. I think qualifiying is arguably the most powerful form of game, you're letting the girl know that your attraction for her isn't just based on her looks, and subsequently her attraction for you increases.

 

[John92]

@Will_V

What about disqualification or push? I would think if this is done in an uncalibrated way then it could blow up in your face.

In some of my interactions when the girl has said something negative in regard to a screening question I asked, I say "ohh thats definitely a red flag, not sure if me and you are going to get along" in a playful way. The issue is there is no pull.

I should have said "you're a nice girl, but thats definitely a red flag"

 

[JT Sunshine]

I think the forum consensus was "excuse me" works well in europe, but apparently not in the US.

can be negatively associated with people coming up and asking you for money, cigarettes etc.

that being said I find street approaches you need *something* to get her focus before delivering an opener.

let’s say my opener is “those boots look super fuzzy… but are they actually warm?” if I just went up and said that, she could not hear me, or ignore me, or say “what?”

but if I say “hey… (wait for her attention) those boots look super fuzzy… but are they actually warm?” you have a MUCH better chance at a good response. Field tested.

I know a lot of people use “excuse me” but I prefer “hey”. Seems more friendly/informal

 

[TimeMachineDAD]

@Will_V

What about disqualification or push? I would think if this is done in an uncalibrated way then it could blow up in your face.

In some of my interactions when the girl has said something negative in regard to a screening question I asked, I say "ohh thats definitely a red flag, not sure if me and you are going to get along" in a playful way. The issue is there is no pull.

I should have said "you're a nice girl, but thats definitely a red flag"

I am not @Will_V , but that doesn't stop me from KJ:ing:

Light banter trough texting is ok, but calibration is much more difficult trough this communication medium.

In person you can drop pretty strong disqualifiers, read her and course correct:
- "Omg, that's so red flag!"
And if her face drops and she goes quiet, you can follow up with something like
- "but you are too cute to resist(or better refer to how you qualified her bit earlier), come here" and give her a hug.

Executing this trough text would be really difficult, because of impossibility of reading her