Admonitions of the Asian Babe
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
Sure, we do subconsciously seek genetically compatible partners and we're drawn to those with different immune system genes.
I will say that he smelled really really good compared to other men, and he told me the same - that 1 out of every 20 girls smells as good as me (so 5% of women he's slept with). It also made it super easy to fall asleep with him. So yes, we probably have better genetic compatibility.
NGL, if I'm ever single I'd consider seeing him again. The pull towards him is biological though my mind is like "no don't go back, please auto-reject the possibility" lmao
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
Okay but the girl might be able to...
“I can bear any pain as long as it has meaning.” - Haruki Murakami
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
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Inhibitions
Before I had met my husband, I briefly dated a boy who was a year or two younger than me. I met him through one of my best friends at a convention. I expected it to be pretty casual, but then he asked me to officially be his girlfriend after 2 weeks. To be fair, I did make him cum 7 times in a night. Always made sure his balls were empty before going back home.. Anyways, he lived 2 hours away so we would see each other every weekend. 5 months later, his birthday was coming up and I got him some very expensive shoes + customized an item for him + wrote a very thoughtful note.
A little after his birthday, he went out with just his housemates to celebrate, got blackout drunk and cheated on me with a random girl. He later confessed and apologized to me, and partially blamed it on the 2 hour distance but his main excuse was "I blacked out and forgot I was in a relationship. She was all over me." Mmm, I wasn't buying that excuse - also because one of my exes, whenever he was drunk, instead would brag to his friends and tell them how much he loved me when we were together.
So the truth was that the boy was not very good at relationships, which was what his housemate said too after I found out.
Sometimes that's the consequence of giving someone the benefit of the doubt.
After we broke up I promised myself I'd never get that drunk nor drink until blacking out. I'd rather make all my bad decisions sober and remember them in detail so I can take accountability. Because of him, I only drink maybe once or twice a year now - typically the low calorie/low alc % and max of 1 drink per night - usually just sipping and not finishing it. Oh yeah, he was a part-time bartender too, so never dating bartenders again either..
Alcohol is also bad for aging anyways, so I don't regret not drinking as much as my peers did. The guy in my LR said I didn't look older than 26 - thanks to a combination of Asian genes + working out + good nutrition + sunscreen/skincare + not drinking/smoking I think.
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Quote of the Day:
"If there's a beginning, there must be an end. From creation, to struggle, to redemption. Life no matter what, is being pulled towards a brighter future. Even if it doesn't feel like it, right now is a blessing. And if you step back from this moment and look at the history of your life, your life in the history of the world, you'll see that there has never been anything but blessing. "
- Ali, Euphoria S3 E7
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Inhibitions
Before I had met my husband, I briefly dated a boy who was a year or two younger than me. I met him through one of my best friends at a convention. I expected it to be pretty casual, but then he asked me to officially be his girlfriend after 2 weeks. To be fair, I did make him cum 7 times in a night. Always made sure his balls were empty before going back home.. Anyways, he lived 2 hours away so we would see each other every weekend. 5 months later, his birthday was coming up and I got him some very expensive shoes + customized an item for him + wrote a very thoughtful note.
A little after his birthday, he went out with just his housemates to celebrate, got blackout drunk and cheated on me with a random girl. He later confessed and apologized to me, and partially blamed it on the 2 hour distance but his main excuse was "I blacked out and forgot I was in a relationship. She was all over me." Mmm, I wasn't buying that excuse - also because one of my exes, whenever he was drunk, instead would brag to his friends and tell them how much he loved me when we were together.
So the truth was that the boy was not very good at relationships, which was what his housemate said too after I found out.
Sometimes that's the consequence of giving someone the benefit of the doubt.
After we broke up I promised myself I'd never get that drunk nor drink until blacking out. I'd rather make all my bad decisions sober and remember them in detail so I can take accountability. Because of him, I only drink maybe once or twice a year now - typically the low calorie/low alc % and max of 1 drink per night - usually just sipping and not finishing it. Oh yeah, he was a part-time bartender too, so never dating bartenders again either..
Alcohol is also bad for aging anyways, so I don't regret not drinking as much as my peers did. The guy in my LR said I didn't look older than 26 - thanks to a combination of Asian genes + working out + good nutrition + sunscreen/skincare + not drinking/smoking I think.
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Quote of the Day:
"If there's a beginning, there must be an end. From creation, to struggle, to redemption. Life no matter what, is being pulled towards a brighter future. Even if it doesn't feel like it, right now is a blessing. And if you step back from this moment and look at the history of your life, your life in the history of the world, you'll see that there has never been anything but blessing. "
- Ali, Euphoria S3 E7
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- Joined
- Mar 27, 2023
- Messages
- 2,131
The sexy sons thing is getting more promiscuous genes from the guy so your sons will inherit the trait and spread your own genes.
Also - anterior fornix
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
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- 176
..Is that why in the back of my mind, I still want to call him?
I wonder if having my IUD interferes with orgasms... I do get cramps/sharp pain but I thought that's just from guys hitting my cervix in general. Cramps/pain are still worth it though, as long as he doesn't put me in the ER haha
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2023
- Messages
- 2,131
Him being able to walk away is an honest signal of preselection. Vs the husband asking for permission to stay in your life.Is that why in the back of my mind, I still want to call him?
The ability of your husband to be able to find a new partner is a lot different than the ability to get laid a lot.
Plus you have sampled them both... If you have boxed wine at home do you dream of that amazing glass at a tasting event? Probably.
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
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Rosters
Some women have a roster of men they fall back on when their main guy fucks up. Then there's also orbiters who are waiting for the guy to fuck up and for the girl to be on the market again. The roster/orbiters can be inactive while the women are in a committed relationship, but they will resurface and check in after many years just in case her situation has changed. But that's due to their lack of abundance in quality women right? They might've slept with a lot of other women by this point, so why circle back to her? Did they realize that the others dulled in comparison or have they not met enough women? Or have they run out of patience to keep courting women over and over again? Or do they regret not fully exploring things with that woman?
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Casual Sex Only Works for Me if There's Meaning
For me personally, I can't have sex if it's not meaningful, passionate or if there's no prior emotional connection. Meaningless sex gets repetitive, mundane, and unstimulating. For that reason, I always prefer FWB over FB scenarios. If I'm trying to just meet my minimum for physical needs, sure it'll suffice, just like how food that isn't delicious will suffice for survival and temporarily satiate your appetite. It might be bland but it does the job.
And unfortunately, yes once you have a taste of something sublime, it's hard to go back to anything less. You can't help but compare. And if you had a taste of so many, at what point do you become comfortable enough to settle down for just enough? In the back of your mind, that longing for more will be ever present. That is, until we learn to be content with what we have, right? "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get." - Dale Carnegie. That's where I feel conflicted at times. I am torn between wanting to stay for stability and familiarity (something I've always needed but once I got it, became complacent), and wanting freedom to explore something new. (something I'll always crave but the fear of the uncertainty/unknown holds me back)
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Oh Well...Whatever Happens, Happens..
In a way, I wish I hadn't met him. He was the outside variable that the universe conspired to help me find and the catalyst for a major shift in my life. I couldn't just go back to my normal life like nothing happened. Our time was brief sure but it was a weekend of intensity, passion, and also comfort and connection. I didn't realize that men like him existed and I certainly didn't expect to meet him.
When I think of it, most men just walk into my life. I'm never intentionally seeking or looking for them. That's why I've stayed off those dating apps, I don't need them to meet men. Whenever I'm single (which is pretty brief because men try to snatch me up quickly), I mainly focus on myself and happily spend time with my platonic friends. I wasn't looking for a husband and turned down many men. I was content and tried to convince myself "I won't fall for another guy again like that" - in reference to an ex-fiancé of 6ish years. Then I was proven wrong once again when I met my husband.
The universe is really testing me this time. I am now going out of my way to avoid men IRL, to avoid situations of temptation, to co-exist with my shadow but not let it take control of my impulses. I pray that I never run into any of you IRL...and if we do meet, I hope to have enough tact and awareness by that point to recognize a skilled seducer, and I may ask you for tips on seducing other women lol.
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Is Too Much Compliance Bad?
Perhaps being too compliant led to my current situation. I often prioritize others' needs over my own. I shouldn't have immediately agreed with my husband to cancel that romantic getaway in order to attend that other event he really wanted to go to - where I unexpectedly met that guy I eventually slept with. Maybe I should've said "No darling, I think we should keep this cabin booked. We need this romantic weekend together." Fuck. No, I can't regret anything I've done - everything happens for a reason. We all have agency to an extent. Though we cannot change the direction of the wind, we can adjust the sails.
Amor Fati.
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Quote of the Day
"It is your work in life that is the ultimate seduction." - Pablo Picasso
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Rosters
Some women have a roster of men they fall back on when their main guy fucks up. Then there's also orbiters who are waiting for the guy to fuck up and for the girl to be on the market again. The roster/orbiters can be inactive while the women are in a committed relationship, but they will resurface and check in after many years just in case her situation has changed. But that's due to their lack of abundance in quality women right? They might've slept with a lot of other women by this point, so why circle back to her? Did they realize that the others dulled in comparison or have they not met enough women? Or have they run out of patience to keep courting women over and over again? Or do they regret not fully exploring things with that woman?
─────── ✧ ───────
Casual Sex Only Works for Me if There's Meaning
For me personally, I can't have sex if it's not meaningful, passionate or if there's no prior emotional connection. Meaningless sex gets repetitive, mundane, and unstimulating. For that reason, I always prefer FWB over FB scenarios. If I'm trying to just meet my minimum for physical needs, sure it'll suffice, just like how food that isn't delicious will suffice for survival and temporarily satiate your appetite. It might be bland but it does the job.
And unfortunately, yes once you have a taste of something sublime, it's hard to go back to anything less. You can't help but compare. And if you had a taste of so many, at what point do you become comfortable enough to settle down for just enough? In the back of your mind, that longing for more will be ever present. That is, until we learn to be content with what we have, right? "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get." - Dale Carnegie. That's where I feel conflicted at times. I am torn between wanting to stay for stability and familiarity (something I've always needed but once I got it, became complacent), and wanting freedom to explore something new. (something I'll always crave but the fear of the uncertainty/unknown holds me back)
─────── ✧ ───────
Oh Well...Whatever Happens, Happens..
In a way, I wish I hadn't met him. He was the outside variable that the universe conspired to help me find and the catalyst for a major shift in my life. I couldn't just go back to my normal life like nothing happened. Our time was brief sure but it was a weekend of intensity, passion, and also comfort and connection. I didn't realize that men like him existed and I certainly didn't expect to meet him.
When I think of it, most men just walk into my life. I'm never intentionally seeking or looking for them. That's why I've stayed off those dating apps, I don't need them to meet men. Whenever I'm single (which is pretty brief because men try to snatch me up quickly), I mainly focus on myself and happily spend time with my platonic friends. I wasn't looking for a husband and turned down many men. I was content and tried to convince myself "I won't fall for another guy again like that" - in reference to an ex-fiancé of 6ish years. Then I was proven wrong once again when I met my husband.
The universe is really testing me this time. I am now going out of my way to avoid men IRL, to avoid situations of temptation, to co-exist with my shadow but not let it take control of my impulses. I pray that I never run into any of you IRL...and if we do meet, I hope to have enough tact and awareness by that point to recognize a skilled seducer, and I may ask you for tips on seducing other women lol.
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Is Too Much Compliance Bad?
Perhaps being too compliant led to my current situation. I often prioritize others' needs over my own. I shouldn't have immediately agreed with my husband to cancel that romantic getaway in order to attend that other event he really wanted to go to - where I unexpectedly met that guy I eventually slept with. Maybe I should've said "No darling, I think we should keep this cabin booked. We need this romantic weekend together." Fuck. No, I can't regret anything I've done - everything happens for a reason. We all have agency to an extent. Though we cannot change the direction of the wind, we can adjust the sails.
Amor Fati.
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Quote of the Day
"It is your work in life that is the ultimate seduction." - Pablo Picasso
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- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
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Weekend FR - Goth Hairdresser & Shapely Yogis
Saturday was pampering day - got a pedi with my hubby and then a hair trim. The nail techs at the salon thought I looked Korean or Japanese because of my light skin and outfit. Then I surprised them by speaking Vietnamese. We made cute little jokes back and forth about my hubby (in English so he could understand and laugh along), like suggesting he get matching turquoise nail polish with me.
Then I walked over to another salon for my hair appointment with a young, slim goth hairdresser. She wore a black lace dress overlaying her tattoo beneath her clavicle, and a couple of other tattoos on her arms. I asked her how she got into hairdressing and she told me how she used to be an NP for the elderly until mid-pandemic. She said the environment was boring/depressing to her and she preferred the lively environment of the salon and embracing her more creative side. I told her I could relate somewhat, and that I have to keep making art & other creative hobbies outside of my clinically detached engineering job to maintain sanity.
The hairdresser was an interesting girl but I could tell she wasn't that content working there as she let on to be. Her situation reminded me of when I was younger, and indecisive about my career path. If it's not hairdressing/cosmetology, I hope she finds something she's truly passionate about and happy to be doing.
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Sunday morning, hubby and I attended a large outdoor yoga event at the art museum. The event included entry for the museum too. You could not complain about the dozens of fit and toned yogis here, especially the woman in front of me, with her super wide hips, defined waist and the most shapely glutes but I don't recall her facial features.. Another woman that caught my attention from a distance had wonderful bone structure, beautiful eyes, bright smile, wearing a matching hot pink yoga set. She had the kind of sculpted/highly symmetrical face artists paint when they envision an idealized beauty. Wouldn't be surprised if she was an influencer or tourist visiting from LA for the weekend.
Anyways, once the yoga session was over, I was hoping we'd linger around longer to talk to women but hubby quickly rushed us back to the car to put away our mats, and then we entered the art museum to look at the new exhibits. We passed by a cute, petite tan brunette inside and she asked me if we just attended the yoga session too. She seemed a bit shy, I felt shy and was losing pace with my longer-limbed husband so after a brief pause we continued walking in opposite directions... Why do some tall men walk like they're in a rush? Or maybe they walk at a normal pace and I'm just vertically challenged.. But I also prefer not being in a hurry, eating my food slowly, speaking slowly, moving with intention and awareness similar to tai chi or balancing fluid motions while inline skating - eloquence and elegance is underrated these days in a fast-paced world.
Takeaways:
- I should've kept engaging museum/yogi girl and forgo keeping up with hubby's pace. He could've just called my phone if I got lost lol.
- I probably need to go out alone to talk to more women, but I don't want to run into any charming men.
Other Notes:
- There are gay events I could attend for a higher chance of meeting bisexual women to bring home.
Issue is hubby could be more charismatic/cool - knew some bi ladies who were down for playing with me, but when I introduced my hubby, they weren't into him. Although quite handsome and athletic, he doesn't project as much excitement/energy compared to say, a very charismatic/cool seducer. Maybe hubby could use some coaching? And I could find a women's dating coach for myself.
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Quote of the Day
"For a long while now I've suspected that connection with another person, a real connection with another person, simply isn't possible. I'm curious if you disagree. Although I suspect you feel as I do in this, as you do in so many other things. So, tell me. Is it possible to truly know another person? Is it even a worthwhile pursuit?
Yours is the only opinion I'll trust, the only point of view that holds even the faintest interest. I find my diversions as I always do, but the days are long in this grey place." - Jamie Moriarty, Elementary S2 E3
I think in the same episode, Sherlock tells Watson "We have cold cases/bigger problems to solve than helping your friend with an MIA pick up artist." Man this show is so relatable lol.
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Weekend FR - Goth Hairdresser & Shapely Yogis
Saturday was pampering day - got a pedi with my hubby and then a hair trim. The nail techs at the salon thought I looked Korean or Japanese because of my light skin and outfit. Then I surprised them by speaking Vietnamese. We made cute little jokes back and forth about my hubby (in English so he could understand and laugh along), like suggesting he get matching turquoise nail polish with me.
Then I walked over to another salon for my hair appointment with a young, slim goth hairdresser. She wore a black lace dress overlaying her tattoo beneath her clavicle, and a couple of other tattoos on her arms. I asked her how she got into hairdressing and she told me how she used to be an NP for the elderly until mid-pandemic. She said the environment was boring/depressing to her and she preferred the lively environment of the salon and embracing her more creative side. I told her I could relate somewhat, and that I have to keep making art & other creative hobbies outside of my clinically detached engineering job to maintain sanity.
The hairdresser was an interesting girl but I could tell she wasn't that content working there as she let on to be. Her situation reminded me of when I was younger, and indecisive about my career path. If it's not hairdressing/cosmetology, I hope she finds something she's truly passionate about and happy to be doing.
───── ✧ ─────
Sunday morning, hubby and I attended a large outdoor yoga event at the art museum. The event included entry for the museum too. You could not complain about the dozens of fit and toned yogis here, especially the woman in front of me, with her super wide hips, defined waist and the most shapely glutes but I don't recall her facial features.. Another woman that caught my attention from a distance had wonderful bone structure, beautiful eyes, bright smile, wearing a matching hot pink yoga set. She had the kind of sculpted/highly symmetrical face artists paint when they envision an idealized beauty. Wouldn't be surprised if she was an influencer or tourist visiting from LA for the weekend.
Anyways, once the yoga session was over, I was hoping we'd linger around longer to talk to women but hubby quickly rushed us back to the car to put away our mats, and then we entered the art museum to look at the new exhibits. We passed by a cute, petite tan brunette inside and she asked me if we just attended the yoga session too. She seemed a bit shy, I felt shy and was losing pace with my longer-limbed husband so after a brief pause we continued walking in opposite directions... Why do some tall men walk like they're in a rush? Or maybe they walk at a normal pace and I'm just vertically challenged.. But I also prefer not being in a hurry, eating my food slowly, speaking slowly, moving with intention and awareness similar to tai chi or balancing fluid motions while inline skating - eloquence and elegance is underrated these days in a fast-paced world.
Takeaways:
- I should've kept engaging museum/yogi girl and forgo keeping up with hubby's pace. He could've just called my phone if I got lost lol.
- I probably need to go out alone to talk to more women, but I don't want to run into any charming men.
Other Notes:
- There are gay events I could attend for a higher chance of meeting bisexual women to bring home.
Issue is hubby could be more charismatic/cool - knew some bi ladies who were down for playing with me, but when I introduced my hubby, they weren't into him. Although quite handsome and athletic, he doesn't project as much excitement/energy compared to say, a very charismatic/cool seducer. Maybe hubby could use some coaching? And I could find a women's dating coach for myself.
─────── ✧ ───────
Quote of the Day
"For a long while now I've suspected that connection with another person, a real connection with another person, simply isn't possible. I'm curious if you disagree. Although I suspect you feel as I do in this, as you do in so many other things. So, tell me. Is it possible to truly know another person? Is it even a worthwhile pursuit?
Yours is the only opinion I'll trust, the only point of view that holds even the faintest interest. I find my diversions as I always do, but the days are long in this grey place." - Jamie Moriarty, Elementary S2 E3
I think in the same episode, Sherlock tells Watson "We have cold cases/bigger problems to solve than helping your friend with an MIA pick up artist." Man this show is so relatable lol.
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- Joined
- Mar 27, 2023
- Messages
- 2,131
Re:
www.skilledseducer.com
How do you expect to run into another seducer like that?
You are in SoCal? Might help to DM @Hue for sex therapy
Special Girl - Ways to get low lay count girls and virgins regardless of game style....Women are women part 3.-
Before reading this i will advise you to read women are women part 1, and women are women part 2, also i encourage you to use CRITICAL THINKING and make your OWN CONCLUSIONS...This is a continuation and a follow to different posts and promises i made on how to do this specially night game.... i...
www.skilledseducer.com
How do you expect to run into another seducer like that?
You are in SoCal? Might help to DM @Hue for sex therapy
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
I don't expect to, it's just a What if scenario if I were to be hypothetically prepared for that.
Not anymore, east coast.
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
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I counted and have gone 8 months without physically cheating again so far. As far as sex goes with hubby, it varies - could be once a month, once or twice a week, sometimes 4-5 times a week but that's rare. He's too tired when he gets home from work or a run, so it's usually in the middle of the night/early morning. And usually no round 2, he falls right back asleep afterwards or gets ready for work.
The issue is that one seducer is still in the back rooms of my mind. He said he didn't want to be in the background nor be in the crossfire. Well, physically that's true, but my brain had other ideas. The only helpful thing is that he's a constant reminder for my future actions.
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The ideals of womanhood - is such a thing impossible to obtain or maintain? Or did holding such high standards over their heads actually make things worse?
Admonitions Scroll
"In the boundlessness of creation, yin and yang first separated out.
Scattered qi and flowing substance were moulded and shaped.
At the time of Emperor Fu Xi, heaven and human were first divided.
Thus began the relationship of husband and wife, as well as that of lord and minister.
The way of the household is regulated, the plans of the ruler are ordered.
A woman's virtue values gentleness; she conceals beauty within, and is pure and perfect.
Gentle and meek, virtuous and careful, her proper place is in the chamber.
When she gets married the girl arranges her robes and ties up her apron; respectfully she prepares the household meals.
Solemn and dignified in bearing, with pure virtue she gazes up reverently."
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Personality Notes
MBTI: INFJ
Enneagram: 4w3
Big 5 - O: 85, C: 90, E: 60, A: 90, N: 60
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Quote of the Day
"What is better? To be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?" - Paarthurnax, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
A cool quote from a great game, but we are all made of good/evil, light/darkness, yin/yang. Moving beyond these moral dichotomies is more helpful, imo. We can't just keep trapping ourselves in a cycle of shame and perfectionism. I think most important is wanting to help others, and doing what we can to prevent harming them or ourselves.
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I counted and have gone 8 months without physically cheating again so far. As far as sex goes with hubby, it varies - could be once a month, once or twice a week, sometimes 4-5 times a week but that's rare. He's too tired when he gets home from work or a run, so it's usually in the middle of the night/early morning. And usually no round 2, he falls right back asleep afterwards or gets ready for work.
The issue is that one seducer is still in the back rooms of my mind. He said he didn't want to be in the background nor be in the crossfire. Well, physically that's true, but my brain had other ideas. The only helpful thing is that he's a constant reminder for my future actions.
─────── ✧ ───────
The ideals of womanhood - is such a thing impossible to obtain or maintain? Or did holding such high standards over their heads actually make things worse?
Admonitions Scroll
"In the boundlessness of creation, yin and yang first separated out.
Scattered qi and flowing substance were moulded and shaped.
At the time of Emperor Fu Xi, heaven and human were first divided.
Thus began the relationship of husband and wife, as well as that of lord and minister.
The way of the household is regulated, the plans of the ruler are ordered.
A woman's virtue values gentleness; she conceals beauty within, and is pure and perfect.
Gentle and meek, virtuous and careful, her proper place is in the chamber.
When she gets married the girl arranges her robes and ties up her apron; respectfully she prepares the household meals.
Solemn and dignified in bearing, with pure virtue she gazes up reverently."
─────── ✧ ───────
Personality Notes
MBTI: INFJ
Enneagram: 4w3
Big 5 - O: 85, C: 90, E: 60, A: 90, N: 60
─────── ✧ ───────
Quote of the Day
"What is better? To be born good, or to overcome your evil nature through great effort?" - Paarthurnax, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
A cool quote from a great game, but we are all made of good/evil, light/darkness, yin/yang. Moving beyond these moral dichotomies is more helpful, imo. We can't just keep trapping ourselves in a cycle of shame and perfectionism. I think most important is wanting to help others, and doing what we can to prevent harming them or ourselves.
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- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
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Experience with xNTJs
If an xNTJ is the flame, then I am the moth because I'm always drawn to them and my most significant and fulfilling LTRs/flings were/are with xNTJ men.
IME, xNTJs are some of the most intelligent and logical people I've ever met. ENTJs are very charismatic and ambitious, and INTJs are very meticulous and strategic. They are SO magnetic but they can also be overly blunt, and incredibly dominating (in good ways too) They have some very unique ideals, and abstract visions, which are in theory great but when they go to execute them or capitalize on opportunities, they sometimes forget how it emotionally impact others and their intentions can come off as apathetic or expedient if they are not careful.
They prioritize efficiency and personal values while I prioritize group harmony and impact. They're able to detach and compartmentalize more easily from their emotions - I envy this because there are times I wish I could detach and compartmentalize like they do, but it takes much longer for me to do so. They tend to be more pragmatic and grounded than I am. Sometimes, I'm the balloon floating away, building large castles in the sky, and they are the rock trying to tether me, bringing me back down to earth and reminding me we can build more realistic castles on the ground too.
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Randomness
I bought a new sonic toothbrush with water flossing built in, but because it flosses intermittently it just reminds me of a guy cumming in my mouth...
A lady friend asked me "don't you ever crave new cock?" I mostly crave the men attached to the cock tbh. But I don't usually crave new cock, just the last two (my husband and that one guy). I might've fantasized once about having a threesome with them when I sat in between them on a bench.
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Quote of the Day
"The secret of rulership is to combine a belief in one's own infallibility with the power to learn from past mistakes." - George Orwell (1984)
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Experience with xNTJs
If an xNTJ is the flame, then I am the moth because I'm always drawn to them and my most significant and fulfilling LTRs/flings were/are with xNTJ men.
IME, xNTJs are some of the most intelligent and logical people I've ever met. ENTJs are very charismatic and ambitious, and INTJs are very meticulous and strategic. They are SO magnetic but they can also be overly blunt, and incredibly dominating (in good ways too
) They have some very unique ideals, and abstract visions, which are in theory great but when they go to execute them or capitalize on opportunities, they sometimes forget how it emotionally impact others and their intentions can come off as apathetic or expedient if they are not careful.They prioritize efficiency and personal values while I prioritize group harmony and impact. They're able to detach and compartmentalize more easily from their emotions - I envy this because there are times I wish I could detach and compartmentalize like they do, but it takes much longer for me to do so. They tend to be more pragmatic and grounded than I am. Sometimes, I'm the balloon floating away, building large castles in the sky, and they are the rock trying to tether me, bringing me back down to earth and reminding me we can build more realistic castles on the ground too.
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Randomness
I bought a new sonic toothbrush with water flossing built in, but because it flosses intermittently it just reminds me of a guy cumming in my mouth
...A lady friend asked me "don't you ever crave new cock?" I mostly crave the men attached to the cock tbh. But I don't usually crave new cock, just the last two (my husband and that one guy). I might've fantasized once about having a threesome with them when I sat in between them on a bench.
─────── ✧ ───────
Quote of the Day
"The secret of rulership is to combine a belief in one's own infallibility with the power to learn from past mistakes." - George Orwell (1984)
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- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
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Trying to compile all my likely archetypes - feel free to suggest more if you think they apply.
These are also accompanied by my mild ADHD + OCD (good because needing to clean balances out the ADHD that would forget to tidy up a mess due to distraction, bad because recurring thoughts happen during cleaning/chores lol)
Archetypes
✦ Time Machine Girl - Most of adulthood was spent in a 2.5, 6.5 and 7 year LTRs with flings/STRs in between. Socially conditioned by conservative upbringing -> currently moderate/liberal leaning worldviews
✦ Post-Quarantine Girl - Moved in with him right before pandemic, married during pandemic
✦ Shy Excited Girls - Shy at first externally, internally excited/child-like curiosity/playful, stable profession, ambitious, generally optimistic, retaining 10-15yr platonic friendships with a small circle of quality male/female confidants, somewhat fashionable but not overtly/over the top
✦ NJR (Modern Woman) / NDI (Hopeful Romantic) / TJR (Seductress)
✦ Curious but Slightly Cynical? - I think due to Time Machine + my age, I'm stuck in between Curious/Inquisitive and slightly Cynical mindsets. If you allow me to, I don't mind taking most of the blame in a situation, will take mental notes from my mistakes, end on good terms, and not hold a grudge just because something ended (Those guys try to come back later anyways for some reason).
✦ #2: Chill Girl Who Used to be Religious
✦ #1: Ordinary 'Boring' Girls | #2: Women Obsessed with Their Work - Just add some nerdy/geekiness/ND to this
✦ Married / Professional / Shy Girl
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Can the psychology of seduction be compared to an FPS, RPG, MOBA, or a TCG? Would love to see more articles on that.
- Does anyone here play Magic The Gathering? I played a bit of it, and yeah it does help to see 5-10 steps ahead of your opponent to win. Other times, your pattern recognition + RNG helps too. But if you can't predict their next moves, and you don't draw the right cards into hand to make your moves, it's not that easy right?
- For example, do you think that seducer expected or predicted I'd write a reverse lay report as one of the possible outcomes from how he handled letting me down? Because I didn't think I was going to write it, frankly. And there was a 70% chance I wasn't going to post it at all. What are the chances this will happen again with another girl? Do you think we're all going to form a group chat one day? lol
He was likewise, unpredictable. I did think there was a high chance of us becoming physically intimate based on attraction/chemistry, his risky sensation-seeking traits, my emotional state and quite literally every other variable lining up the way it did. But I didn't think he was going ask me to hit him up when I remove my IUD lol.
I maybe thought he could be a player, but didn't think he was going to be a tribal elder level seducer... My intuition failed to an extent this time because he found ways to bypass it and I was blinded by how attracted I was to him. My amygdala got hijacked to an extent essentially. (it's still a bit hijacked due to long term zeignarnik effect, someone send help lol)
Am I that predictable? It makes sense you could deduce what I'm doing if I go on auto-pilot or default woman mode. And when I'm in my luteal phase, I can become kind of delusional/cognitively impaired/experience brain fog if my blood sugar isn't stabilized.
Maybe I'm also here because I can't solve my own female psychology and biology and I'm trying to learn some of it through the lens of how men see it in a way. Your outside perspectives are helpful. Each day, I'm trying to figure things out as I go. I wish we could slowly bridge the gaps even when we're in a world where it's easier to just run away and start over. For me connection > convenience. But I admit it's not an easy path either way.
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Feels like MySpace whenever I attach music to posts lol
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦ .
Trying to compile all my likely archetypes - feel free to suggest more if you think they apply.
These are also accompanied by my mild ADHD + OCD (good because needing to clean balances out the ADHD that would forget to tidy up a mess due to distraction, bad because recurring thoughts happen during cleaning/chores lol)
Archetypes
✦ Time Machine Girl - Most of adulthood was spent in a 2.5, 6.5 and 7 year LTRs with flings/STRs in between. Socially conditioned by conservative upbringing -> currently moderate/liberal leaning worldviews
✦ Post-Quarantine Girl - Moved in with him right before pandemic, married during pandemic
✦ Shy Excited Girls - Shy at first externally, internally excited/child-like curiosity/playful, stable profession, ambitious, generally optimistic, retaining 10-15yr platonic friendships with a small circle of quality male/female confidants, somewhat fashionable but not overtly/over the top
✦ NJR (Modern Woman) / NDI (Hopeful Romantic) / TJR (Seductress)
✦ Curious but Slightly Cynical? - I think due to Time Machine + my age, I'm stuck in between Curious/Inquisitive and slightly Cynical mindsets. If you allow me to, I don't mind taking most of the blame in a situation, will take mental notes from my mistakes, end on good terms, and not hold a grudge just because something ended (Those guys try to come back later anyways for some reason).
✦ #2: Chill Girl Who Used to be Religious
✦ #1: Ordinary 'Boring' Girls | #2: Women Obsessed with Their Work - Just add some nerdy/geekiness/ND to this
✦ Married / Professional / Shy Girl
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Can the psychology of seduction be compared to an FPS, RPG, MOBA, or a TCG? Would love to see more articles on that.
Reflecting on this...Always been curious how seducers know why I'm doing something and what I'm trying to do if I'm not 100% on auto-pilot all the time and my own motivations aren't always linear and are constantly evolving. If I stay in these forums, I'd love for us both to figure that out and help each other.
- Does anyone here play Magic The Gathering? I played a bit of it, and yeah it does help to see 5-10 steps ahead of your opponent to win. Other times, your pattern recognition + RNG helps too. But if you can't predict their next moves, and you don't draw the right cards into hand to make your moves, it's not that easy right?
- For example, do you think that seducer expected or predicted I'd write a reverse lay report as one of the possible outcomes from how he handled letting me down? Because I didn't think I was going to write it, frankly. And there was a 70% chance I wasn't going to post it at all. What are the chances this will happen again with another girl? Do you think we're all going to form a group chat one day? lol
He was likewise, unpredictable. I did think there was a high chance of us becoming physically intimate based on attraction/chemistry, his risky sensation-seeking traits, my emotional state and quite literally every other variable lining up the way it did. But I didn't think he was going ask me to hit him up when I remove my IUD lol.
I maybe thought he could be a player, but didn't think he was going to be a tribal elder level seducer... My intuition failed to an extent this time because he found ways to bypass it and I was blinded by how attracted I was to him. My amygdala got hijacked to an extent essentially. (it's still a bit hijacked due to long term zeignarnik effect, someone send help lol)
Am I that predictable? It makes sense you could deduce what I'm doing if I go on auto-pilot or default woman mode. And when I'm in my luteal phase, I can become kind of delusional/cognitively impaired/experience brain fog if my blood sugar isn't stabilized.
Maybe I'm also here because I can't solve my own female psychology and biology and I'm trying to learn some of it through the lens of how men see it in a way. Your outside perspectives are helpful. Each day, I'm trying to figure things out as I go. I wish we could slowly bridge the gaps even when we're in a world where it's easier to just run away and start over. For me connection > convenience. But I admit it's not an easy path either way.
─────── ✧ ───────
Feels like MySpace whenever I attach music to posts lol
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I can't predict what your seducer was or is thinking. There is a chance - an extremely small chance - that he is often thinking about what happened with you. I don't THINK so, but I could be wrong.
My opinion? He is just as likely to be thinking about that blonde surfer girl he did the next week or that redhead that got out after giving the world's very best BJ ("It was some kind of strange magic and I can't forget her.")
Even the best seducer will not know why you are doing things - and certainly not what you are trying to do.
That said, their predictive abilities are very powerful - for a limited range of operational outcomes: Will she be open to escalation? Will she have sex with me? How might she outwardly react the next day?
He doesn't know - nor is he likely to care - about your internal processes. Just what he can use to affect a very specific outcome.
I doubt if he expected - or cared much - what you did.
He was probably aware that you would obsess about him a bit. But again, it would be limited to the operational concerns ("Will she try to stalk me? Contact my other lovers? Try to contact my primary? Post IDing info on a 'MeToo' site?")
In that context "find a healthy, active PUA website and post our history" would be both an unlikely outcome (EXTREMELY unlikely) and not one that would concern him beyond the ego boost.
Typically, when I've gotten to know someone well enough to have an honest debrieding (a rarity for a ONS), the woman has been the first to know that it was on.
Neither did he.
If he has thought about it at all (he might not have), it would be either "Hmmm. Why did I say that? Oh, well," OR "I say I want kids with every woman - makes them bond hard, and so the sex is more physically intense. "
Only in a limited, operational sense: "What do I need to say or do to get her to have sex NOW?"
I'm glad we can help! It's nice to fantasize about your titz.
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- Joined
- Apr 13, 2026
- Messages
- 176
Appreciate the feedback, and Jamster, please I'm trying to be a productive member / study seduction here
I am not trying to market any assets lol but I can see how the content in my posts can be misinterpreted...
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2023
- Messages
- 2,131
Serious question do you really crave your husband's cock given he doesn't make you cum?I bought a new sonic toothbrush with water flossing built in, but because it flosses intermittently it just reminds me of a guy cumming in my mouth
A lady friend asked me "don't you ever crave new cock?" I mostly crave the men attached to the cock tbh. But I don't usually crave new cock, just the last two (my husband and that one guy). I might've fantasized once about having a threesome with them when I sat in between them on a bench
FYI the up to three fucks to lock in a girl is a known phenomenon, independently developed by Courtney Love and Skills. Given your writing on the seducer seeing steps ahead, he would have known this was to come as your pair bond solidified.