Advanced Technique  Better Ways to Turn Objections to Your Advantage (2010)

Chase

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Originally posted in the first Girls Chase Forum on Wednesday, 21 April 2010

This is something I've been working on more recently; I'd appreciate your thoughts and experiences, gents; really just ironing this out.

One of the toughest parts of interacting with women is when they say something or ask you something you don't like. If a guy confronts them directly, it hurts his attainability. If he bows to them, it hurts his value. Damned if you do, damned if you don't, right?

So more and more I've been addressing objections in really cool, socially savvy ways that actually turn the advantage to the guy's side. Examples:

  • WRONG

    Girl: Are you any good at cooking?
    Guy: Yes, I'm actually pretty talented. [qualifying; V-]

    Girl: Are you any good at cooking?
    Guy: Who wants to know? [confronting; A-]

    RIGHT

    Girl: Are you any good at cooking?
    Guy: Let's just say when it comes to frozen dinners, they want me on Iron Chef. [self-deprecating; V+A+]

    Girl: Are you any good at cooking?
    Guy: Tell you what. Let's make a meal together, and you can tell me. [invitational; triple-threat V+A+C+]

    WRONG

    Girl: What do you want with me?
    Guy: I think you seem really cool and I want to get to know you better. [qualifying; V-]

    Girl: What do you want with me?
    Guy: Nothing; I'm just here for the drinks. [confrontational; A-]

    RIGHT

    Girl: What do you want with me?
    Guy: I'm looking for women tonight who don't hate men like me. [self-deprecating; V+A+]

    Girl: What do you want with me?
    Guy: Haven't quite figured that out just yet. But I'm having fun and I think you are too. So let's just keep hanging out and we'll see what we can figure out together. [invitational; V+A+C+]

So basically, I'm seeing this trend where the traditional answers guys give (either qualifying or confronting) aren't really the most productive, and some less conventional choices are the more attractive options. In most cases when you're encountering resistance, you can address this with either self-deprecation or an invitational response, with the latter being ideal as it's a VAC triple threat.

What are your thoughts, fellas? Do you employ any of these methods? Any different methods? Or if you've been traditionally falling back on qualifying or confrontational responses, have you tried either of the others out lately and noticed a difference? Since I've been using more of self-deprecation and invitations, I've noticed some pretty markedly different (and much warmer and sexier) responses from women. It's a very basic and essential habit (how you respond to objections), so definitely something of some importance.

Chase
 

Flames

Cro-Magnon Man
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Hi Chase I've just noticed this post and actually I find that I do do the VAC answers naturally. I think possibly they are also the most humble and honest answers, as much as anything else, also possibly the most emotional responses.

However, that 2nd one I'd probably just shorten to "I don't know.......yet", smile and wink.

It's a shame this is hidden here though as I think it's quite useful for newbs and oldies alike. :)
 

Whizzy

Cro-Magnon Man
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Hey Chase, saw this post for this first time and liked the comparisons. One set of answers builds intrigue and curiosity about the speaker while the other is just meh/ordinary.
 

DarkKnight

Cro-Magnon Man
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This is actually really good and deserves another bump. Especially answering the "what do you want from me", which can easily lead to confrontation or qualifying.
 

Razorjack

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Feb 22, 2020
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As a general rule:

When you don't have a good reply, it is better to stay quiet and reply with a flirtatious smile or wink.

Better to say nothing and have her wonder, than to kill the interaction with a "wrong" answer.

Saying nothing can build up a bit of intrigue and mystery in her mind, while giving you some time to either think of a good answer or to change the dynamics with for example grabbing her and saying "let's go dance"

My favorite tactic is/was to blatantly interpret her asking such questions as a sign of her attraction and to escalate, e.g. look deeply into her eyes and with a flirtatious smile/smirk, reply "why do you ask?"
 
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