Bonding with groups of people

[CaptainHenley]

Hello,

In Uni right now, trying my hand at blending in with a bunch of different groups

I've noticed that usually the groups that are outgoing, will most likely be going on festivals etc. and do a lot of drugs.
Kind of like a modern hippy thing (studying in the UK btw)
These groups are fine to hang out with in general, and i've gained the respect of everyone, but I am not quite high up in the hierarchy.

Things is, people bond over stuff like that. Creates a "us vs society" setting. They'll bond over smoking, doing shrooms, MDMA etc. ,

and then they are going to talk about what a time they had. The people who do that the most are closer together, more respected, and higher up.


That seems to be the case with most outgoing groups. Smoking, drugs, getting wasted etc...


Thing is I dont wanna do any of these things. None.




How do I raise up in a group like that?

Tried other groups here but they'll be introverted, fatalistic, complaining all the times etc etc which I absolutely cant stand because I am full of life.

That might simply be the scene in the area I am currently at, with a dichotomy like that between groups.

 

[Mike&Ikes]

CaptainHenley, I would suggest you try to find higher caliber people, such as those who are highly motivated and ambitious. You could meet these people at higher end venues, or you can find them at networking parties. These kind of people have little time for drugs and parties because they are building their business or doing some other grandiose thing with their lives. Of course, you yourself must come across as higher caliber as well, otherwise you may find limited success in being a part of these groups. If you like being self-employed or have big plans in life, you will fit right in with successful people. Essentially, these are the kind of people everyone should hang around anyways. In any case, go to high end clubs, go to chamber of commerce meetings, etc. You’ll find the people you’re looking for.

Hope this helps,
-Mike

 

[CaptainHenley]

CaptainHenley, I would suggest you try to find higher caliber people, such as those who are highly motivated and ambitious. You could meet these people at higher end venues, or you can find them at networking parties. These kind of people have little time for drugs and parties because they are building their business or doing some other grandiose thing with their lives. Of course, you yourself must come across as higher caliber as well, otherwise you may find limited success in being a part of these groups. If you like being self-employed or have big plans in life, you will fit right in with successful people. Essentially, these are the kind of people everyone should hang around anyways. In any case, go to high end clubs, go to chamber of commerce meetings, etc. You’ll find the people you’re looking for.

Hope this helps,
-Mike

You are correct, but I am 20 YO.

Would it make sense to hang out with those people at such an early stage, especially when I want to work on the GirlsChase part of life?

I am already hanging out with driven people, doing engineering in a very demanding Uni, need people to have quality relaxation time with who have a healthy view on life and dont waste it away.

I really seem to struggle to find people like that my age, who arent miserable without help from drugs smoking drinking etc

 

[Mike&Ikes]

Well, it doesn’t hurt to kill two birds with one stone, and getting girls definitely isn’t the “be all, end all.”

But I get you, you want to loosen up and not always be stressed with college. So then I would suggest finding a hobby like hiking (I’m not sure if hiking is popular in the U.K.). Shoot, you could even get into yoga, if that’s your cup of tea. The kind of people doing these activities usually aren’t very stressed, and they’re very down to earth people. These people usually are the nature types, and maybe even “save the whales” type. They usually don’t have many unhealthy habits.

But anyways, find a hobby that relaxes you, and you’ll find other people who do the same, and you’ll be able to relax with them and have a good time. (Btw, hiking and yoga are obviously not your only two options lol).

-Mike