Breaking Circle FOR The Girl You Want - Do or Don't?

[Mr.Rob]

We all know NOT to break circle if at all possible, and if its not possible we know NOT to break circle first (i.e. let the girl turn her attention, eye contact, etc to the new party and then you can turn you attention to the new party once she has)... If your new to this topic or why it hurts your seductions see here: https://www.girlschase.com/content/breaking-circle

BUT, is it ever a good idea if your having a conversation and you break circle to interact with a girl you are more interested in? ... That is the question.

My case in point: Yesterday I went to an Easter family social gathering and was talking with my friend, we'll call her Haley. She's not really my type but she's fun to shoot the breeze with and she's my age so we get along well, but I'm not attracted to her.

A younger 18 year old girl, we'll call her "Jacy" who I do find attractive (and also has a crush on me) shows up to the function and I see her floating around in my peripheries and I make a mental note to go talk to her when I finish my plate of food with Haley. Well Jacy comes our way and I'm thinking/hoping she'll come interrupt our convo and join us (as that would be her investing to get my attention). She knows both of us and the 3 of us have had conversations together before so it'd be a bit socially awkward for her not to say "hi" and join our convo for a minute.

Well she nearly approaches our table but instead of joining our convo Jacy just sort of hovers near the table Haley and I are sitting at and pretends to get some food. I was mid conversation with Haley so I chose to not break circle with Haley and but the pressure on Jacy to interrupt our very informal conversation and say "hi" since she approached us after all.

In retrospect Jacy's hovering near our table was basically an approach invitation where she was hoping I would break circle to say "hi" to her, as she either didn't have the gusto or sufficient motivation to interrupt our conversation and assert herself.

Anyway I just continue talking and "hold" circle basically as if I hadn't noticed Jacy, so I continue my convo and a moment later I see Jacy jet off in my peripherals. The next time I see Jacy is at the end of Easter service I make a point to say "hi" and she definitely had an air of auto-rejection, which kinda sucks :/ but is what it is... though I think we can salvage this.

So if I could do it over again I think the best move in this instance would've been to say to Haley, "Oh look its Jacy" and then acknowledge Jacy and bring her into the conversation. Haley wouldn't have cared much and it would've capitalized on the approach invitation.

So what's yall's take on this? Did I do the right thing in not breaking circle or should I have made a point to break circle to capitalize on Jacy's approach invitation? Have you guys ever come across this?

Cheers,
-Rob

 

[Chase]

Rob-

Yep, fine to break circle there.

The whole point of breaking circle is to not convey to the person you're talking to that she is less important than someone else. For obvious reasons, you don't want a girl you hope to sleep with to feel like she is less important to you than some random individual.

When the girl you want to talk to is hovering nearby, however, perfectly acceptable to break for that. You will get lays off this when you start to look for it and capitalize on it; talking to one girl you are not interested in, then suddenly there is a very cute girl hovering on your periphery staring at you trying to get you to break circle. Turn; engage her; and a little while later you are in bed.

You just treat it like a normal conversation transition, as if you were already in a three-person group. Chatting to the girl you're with already; finish up the conversation in a few seconds; then turn smoothly toward the girl on your periphery and engage her as if the two of you were already in conversation. You don't even have to go back to the original girl; she'll take the hint and drift off after she notices you and the new girl totally absorbed in one another.

Sometimes you'll turn to the new girl and it goes nowhere. When that happens, you can always just turn and go back to the original girl if she's still there. Then sometimes the new girl will still be hovering there, and you turn back to her a second time and now she's a lot warmer. Or sometimes she just leaves because she wasn't into you, or decided she didn't like you once you started to talk to her, for whatever reason. It happens.

But if she's on the outside and you can tell she wants to talk to you, and you're more into her than the girl you're with (or if you're with a buddy or whatever), absolutely break circle to pull her in and say hi. And if she hooks, and you dig her, she's just become your new circle.

Chase

 

[foggy]

Have you guys ever come across this?

Yeah dude i volunteer for a B league hockey team. At their games I sell merch. The majority of the time I am behind a booth.

The crowd who goes to the games consists of A) incredibly low value people and B) good looking puck bunnies.

It's been an interesting experience for me. There's been a few instances now where one of the low value people has come up to the booth to talk to me. While I'm in conversation, suddenly I'll see a puck bunny hovering around the booth looking at me out of the corner of their eye. But the puck bunnies only give me approach invitations when I'm in conversation with the low value people.

They are ridiculously quick approach invitations. Before I can wrap up the conversation, they have disappeared. Drives me nuts. At first I thought, yeah I should be polite and end the conversation before turning to the girl. Now I'm thinking I will leave the conversation hanging and open the girl.

 

[Mr.Rob]

The whole point of breaking circle is to not convey to the person you're talking to that she is less important than someone else. For obvious reasons, you don't want a girl you hope to sleep with to feel like she is less important to you than some random individual.

When the girl you want to talk to is hovering nearby, however, perfectly acceptable to break for that. You will get lays off this when you start to look for it and capitalize on it; talking to one girl you are not interested in, then suddenly there is a very cute girl hovering on your periphery staring at you trying to get you to break circle. Turn; engage her; and a little while later you are in bed.

Right on, thanks for the insight Chase.

I was thinking she'd probably assert herself into the interaction and say hi (which would've been ideal as in she'd be working harder to get me) but in retrospect I see how her AI was more a litmus test for her to see which girl I'd rather talk to, by not choosing her she went a bit into auto-rejection.

Yeah in the future I'll probably just add girls giving AI's into the conversation, so that's an easy fix.

They are ridiculously quick approach invitations. Before I can wrap up the conversation, they have disappeared. Drives me nuts. At first I thought, yeah I should be polite and end the conversation before turning to the girl. Now I'm thinking I will leave the conversation hanging and open the girl.

Yeah as long as your not about to make a ridiculously big sale with your low value clientele no harm in going to see if the hovering "puck bunny" needs some help purveying through your B grade merchandise (and gives you a solid out to end a conversation with someone you'd probably rather not be in).

-Rob