Feeling guilty about meeting new woman, but I don't know why?

[FunkMaster69]

Idk if you guys read my break up post, but in short words I was dating a coworker who broke up with me. I tried fixing things and she called the cops on me and told me to stop talking to her. We haven't spoken in months. I was pretty heartbroken but decided that I need to move on after a few months... I've been going out and meeting new people but every time I do or just try, I feel guilty. I don't know why tho. I was expecting to feel anxiety, but not guilt. I gave it my all and she said no. I can't even talk to her anymore without going to jail. So why do I feel guilty when I talk to other women? This is kind of a rhetorical question, but wtf? I got dumped, I tried to rekindle things, and I'm the one feeling guilty? It just doesn't make sense. I'm just confused mostly tbh. I didn't end things, I've said let's talk about things, and I've asked for her back... The answer was no, so why do I feel guilty?

I'm just ranting tbh, I don't really have a question.

 

[DarkKnight]

You blame yourself and have your old relationship on a pedestal. You feel like you are desacrating your relationship if you move on, but that's it you haven't moven on.

Move on. (easier said than done I know)

 

[Lover]

You're probably not really over her even if you said you went through the five stages of grief in your breakup post.

I went through a similar thing once, feeling guilty of meeting new girls. What happened was that I felt I was betraying an ex by doing that. They could definitely sense something was off. Emotionally this makes sense because I felt attached to her, almost as if we still had a bond together.

The way you write about her in this post makes me think you're not over her. You probably still feel attached to her even if the "rational" part of your brain knows you're not together anymore. Emotions like this suck ass but we have to get used to them.

Sometimes our efforts are in vain. But

• You'll do what you do without expecting anything in return.
• You'll probably have more interesting things to do with your life in the future. This will soften the intensity of your emotions because you're too distracted to be bothered by them all the time
• As you grow in your love life, you'll see that girls just handle things differently than guys, and breakups in particular. After a breakup, they usually mind their own business until they get their emotions handled. Guys? We usually try to work things out with unstable emotions. Bad bad idea...

Chase wrote in your other thread to write down your emotions. I will second that. I did that myself during my recent breakup, and man... when I read those notes once I was over my ex... let's just say I never laughed so hard haha

 

[FunkMaster69]

You're probably not really over her even if you said you went through the five stages of grief in your breakup post.

I went through a similar thing once, feeling guilty of meeting new girls. What happened was that I felt I was betraying an ex by doing that. They could definitely sense something was off. Emotionally this makes sense because I felt attached to her, almost as if we still had a bond together.

The way you write about her in this post makes me think you're not over her. You probably still feel attached to her even if the "rational" part of your brain knows you're not together anymore. Emotions like this suck ass but we have to get used to them.

Sometimes our efforts are in vain. But

• You'll do what you do without expecting anything in return.
• You'll probably have more interesting things to do with your life in the future. This will soften the intensity of your emotions because you're too distracted to be bothered by them all the time
• As you grow in your love life, you'll see that girls just handle things differently than guys, and breakups in particular. After a breakup, they usually mind their own business until they get their emotions handled. Guys? We usually try to work things out with unstable emotions. Bad bad idea...

Chase wrote in your other thread to write down your emotions. I will second that. I did that myself during my recent breakup, and man... when I read those notes once I was over my ex... let's just say I never laughed so hard haha

Your kinda right. I'm not 100 percent over it because I'd be open to rekindling things. When I say I'm at acceptance, I mean that I know things are over and that things aren't going to magically work out like the movies and that I need to move on. I've accepted that I'm never going to see her again, but it doesn't mean I'm ok about the fact. I'm just kind of surprised that the emotion I'm feeling is guilt... I was thinking it would be relief, like the first puff of a cigar or a blunt after waiting all day for one.

Lol I'm gunna read these posts in a year or two and probably laugh my ass off.