- Joined
- Jan 2, 2015
- Messages
- 19
This LR is my first in quite a while, and my first good one this year. It begins with a FR as the set up.
It was valentine's day, and I had set up a partner dancing class "meet" with a girl (call her CaliLatina) I knew from salsa dancing who I had taken out for a drink. Deep diving on that date went well, but I could tell from her physical neutrality in response to my kino that I was firmly in the bf candidate /orbiter / dance friend zone I so often find myself in.
It's madenning for me at times with these girls, because we will have great dance chemistry and dance in a very sensual, sexual way, but then they will turn around and treat me like I am just another distant acquaintance at best.
Anyway, I go to this class that is teaching a popular new form of close, slow, sensual dance from africa that has gotten very popular (kizomba). CaliLatina and I had been texting back and forth all week about going to the class. She was excited to go but had other things going on that were in conflict. Then I get there and it becomes obvious that she has completely dance friend zoned me when she shows up having invited another guy I have seen her talking with at the salsa clubs. The class is fun but I'm picking up on the social vibe and feeling my usual sense of "distance" that I feel every time I have a class at a studio. The ladies are friendly and fun when taking the class as my partner, but once we get to the intermission where people mingle I'm always lost in a sea of people conversing where I often find myself alone trying to sort out what the hell everyone else talking about that's get them connecting so well. Getting to the hook point with people in convo at parties continues to be a major sticking point for me.
I had prevously purchased a ticket for this bar bus that drives around town to multiple random bars on major holidays. So when the class ended, my options were 1) use my ticket or 2) pay another $15 for the social dance and be out my $20 ticket as well. This became even more of a no-brainer when I saw CaliLatina's continued "boys chase me" shananigans, so I bolted for the bus at the end of the class. CaliLatina texted me after I left asking if I was coming to the social dance, and I gave her the flakey non-commital answer of "I'm on the fence. Have fun if I don't see you." Felt good to serve it back for once!
I get to the first bar with 15 min to spare and chill with a beer eating what's left of the appetizer buffet (not much).
I decide there's plenty of time to approach the girls on the bus, so my first thought is to start forming alliances with the other guys in the hopes of winging each other later. This pays off as I befriend one dude who is there solo, and another one who is in a three set with two others just before we get on the bus. The bus is literally an old yellow school bus (hilarious) that plays classic rock metal or lounge music at full blast between night spots. I set up behind two girls who aren't the most attractive in the world (but not coyote ugly either), and I see them doing a jello shot as we pull away. I introduce myself to both of them and they give me a jello shot.
We get to bar 2 quickly, and all of us file out. I hadn't eaten much, so I decide to get some tater tots with my next pint. I make my first approach at the bar opening a young hot blonde (part of a 4 set of what appear to be sorority sisters) about how pleased I am that she drinks IPA. Convo stalls out with the blonde when I go to order a drink and (quick) food. I manage to find a table with one of my newfound friends and his buds, and share my tater tots with them and the bus hostess (I kid with her that she can only have one if I can smack her on the behind as she walks up and down the aisle on the bus).
We head back on the bus to the next place, where things get interesting fast. I'm standing near the bar chatting with my new buds, and I notice a cougar from the bus near me has very large shiny earrings on. I approach and say "I'm really enjoying your giant earings. The sparkles are punching me in the face." We make some chit chat and someone mentions that there is a fire pit outside the back porch of the bar, so we head out there. I chat up the cougar a bit more and from out of nowhere the girl sitting next to me gives me a high five while I'm warming my hands by the fire. She is a cute (pretty face and on the very curvy side, but not so much that I would throw her out of bed for eating crackers) younger blonde girl with pink streaks in her hair, call her FiresideGirl. We start chatting and I scootch in next to her at the fire. We deep dive and the kino is starting to get decent. She asks me how old I am and I always make them guess as I look about 30-35 even though I am 41. She is floored when I tell her my real age. In response she says "I guess that makes my title gold digger right?" to which I respond "how about just normal sexual being." To which she says "that's not quite right, but good try though." Then she excuses herself to go to the bathroom. Being sure to demonstrate non-neediness, and honestly not sure if the bus is about to leave, I head back to find everyone. I start chatting with my new friends again when I see her walking by and heading back to the fire. I head back over there and we immediately kino with her holding my hand after I put it on her thigh. We chat a bit longer, then go looking to get back on the bus as it is supposed to leave soon.
Once we get back on the bus she pulls me to her seat where her newfound friends have jello shots. We take a shot each, then when the bus pulls away and the lights go out we start making out.
The rest of the night is pretty much a blur of singing karaoke, trying to get one of my new friends hooked up with one of my new girl's pals (she decided he was too old for her), having a random angry dude challenge me by showing off his skate board (I just paid him a casual compliment about it and let her take care of the rest), and making out like wild animals every time the lights went out on the bus. We got to the last bar and I asked her if we were taking a cab to my place (she didn't live close). She casually explained that she had a room at a five star hotel downtown, so we caught a cab after some wild dancing at the last bar. Unfortunately when we got to the hotel I was well into whiskey dick territory (I usually stop at 2-3 drinks, and I had 9 by this point with not much to eat), but she was so worked up that I managed to give her orgasms with my mouth and hands before we went to sleep. When the early morning came around I fully closed the deal.
Key takaways:
1) alchohol is both a help and a hinderance. I definitely want to work in the general direction of less alchohol and more unassisted social skill. Whiskey penis is no fun.
2) I feel like the biggest difference in my state on this particular night and others was getting into an outcome independent zone where I was genuinely having fun making new friends and being social. It left me open to escalating at the right time without being concerned about rejection.
3) Making out doesn't always ruin your chances for sex later. If anything, I can see where the tension of making out without getting to sex over and over can amp up a girl's arousal. I would even venture to say that just escalating wildly in a public place that's semi-secluded can turn a girl on to the point of removing all LMR later.
4) The general atmosphere of the party bus on a major romantic holiday made things way easier.
5) The particular girl I met was obviously planning to take the right guy home (she even took care of the logistics) so I don't have any sudden delusions that I'm some kind of pickup god now.
6) I want to go on another bar bus!
It was valentine's day, and I had set up a partner dancing class "meet" with a girl (call her CaliLatina) I knew from salsa dancing who I had taken out for a drink. Deep diving on that date went well, but I could tell from her physical neutrality in response to my kino that I was firmly in the bf candidate /orbiter / dance friend zone I so often find myself in.
It's madenning for me at times with these girls, because we will have great dance chemistry and dance in a very sensual, sexual way, but then they will turn around and treat me like I am just another distant acquaintance at best.
Anyway, I go to this class that is teaching a popular new form of close, slow, sensual dance from africa that has gotten very popular (kizomba). CaliLatina and I had been texting back and forth all week about going to the class. She was excited to go but had other things going on that were in conflict. Then I get there and it becomes obvious that she has completely dance friend zoned me when she shows up having invited another guy I have seen her talking with at the salsa clubs. The class is fun but I'm picking up on the social vibe and feeling my usual sense of "distance" that I feel every time I have a class at a studio. The ladies are friendly and fun when taking the class as my partner, but once we get to the intermission where people mingle I'm always lost in a sea of people conversing where I often find myself alone trying to sort out what the hell everyone else talking about that's get them connecting so well. Getting to the hook point with people in convo at parties continues to be a major sticking point for me.
I had prevously purchased a ticket for this bar bus that drives around town to multiple random bars on major holidays. So when the class ended, my options were 1) use my ticket or 2) pay another $15 for the social dance and be out my $20 ticket as well. This became even more of a no-brainer when I saw CaliLatina's continued "boys chase me" shananigans, so I bolted for the bus at the end of the class. CaliLatina texted me after I left asking if I was coming to the social dance, and I gave her the flakey non-commital answer of "I'm on the fence. Have fun if I don't see you." Felt good to serve it back for once!
I get to the first bar with 15 min to spare and chill with a beer eating what's left of the appetizer buffet (not much).
I decide there's plenty of time to approach the girls on the bus, so my first thought is to start forming alliances with the other guys in the hopes of winging each other later. This pays off as I befriend one dude who is there solo, and another one who is in a three set with two others just before we get on the bus. The bus is literally an old yellow school bus (hilarious) that plays classic rock metal or lounge music at full blast between night spots. I set up behind two girls who aren't the most attractive in the world (but not coyote ugly either), and I see them doing a jello shot as we pull away. I introduce myself to both of them and they give me a jello shot.
We get to bar 2 quickly, and all of us file out. I hadn't eaten much, so I decide to get some tater tots with my next pint. I make my first approach at the bar opening a young hot blonde (part of a 4 set of what appear to be sorority sisters) about how pleased I am that she drinks IPA. Convo stalls out with the blonde when I go to order a drink and (quick) food. I manage to find a table with one of my newfound friends and his buds, and share my tater tots with them and the bus hostess (I kid with her that she can only have one if I can smack her on the behind as she walks up and down the aisle on the bus).
We head back on the bus to the next place, where things get interesting fast. I'm standing near the bar chatting with my new buds, and I notice a cougar from the bus near me has very large shiny earrings on. I approach and say "I'm really enjoying your giant earings. The sparkles are punching me in the face." We make some chit chat and someone mentions that there is a fire pit outside the back porch of the bar, so we head out there. I chat up the cougar a bit more and from out of nowhere the girl sitting next to me gives me a high five while I'm warming my hands by the fire. She is a cute (pretty face and on the very curvy side, but not so much that I would throw her out of bed for eating crackers) younger blonde girl with pink streaks in her hair, call her FiresideGirl. We start chatting and I scootch in next to her at the fire. We deep dive and the kino is starting to get decent. She asks me how old I am and I always make them guess as I look about 30-35 even though I am 41. She is floored when I tell her my real age. In response she says "I guess that makes my title gold digger right?" to which I respond "how about just normal sexual being." To which she says "that's not quite right, but good try though." Then she excuses herself to go to the bathroom. Being sure to demonstrate non-neediness, and honestly not sure if the bus is about to leave, I head back to find everyone. I start chatting with my new friends again when I see her walking by and heading back to the fire. I head back over there and we immediately kino with her holding my hand after I put it on her thigh. We chat a bit longer, then go looking to get back on the bus as it is supposed to leave soon.
Once we get back on the bus she pulls me to her seat where her newfound friends have jello shots. We take a shot each, then when the bus pulls away and the lights go out we start making out.
The rest of the night is pretty much a blur of singing karaoke, trying to get one of my new friends hooked up with one of my new girl's pals (she decided he was too old for her), having a random angry dude challenge me by showing off his skate board (I just paid him a casual compliment about it and let her take care of the rest), and making out like wild animals every time the lights went out on the bus. We got to the last bar and I asked her if we were taking a cab to my place (she didn't live close). She casually explained that she had a room at a five star hotel downtown, so we caught a cab after some wild dancing at the last bar. Unfortunately when we got to the hotel I was well into whiskey dick territory (I usually stop at 2-3 drinks, and I had 9 by this point with not much to eat), but she was so worked up that I managed to give her orgasms with my mouth and hands before we went to sleep. When the early morning came around I fully closed the deal.
Key takaways:
1) alchohol is both a help and a hinderance. I definitely want to work in the general direction of less alchohol and more unassisted social skill. Whiskey penis is no fun.
2) I feel like the biggest difference in my state on this particular night and others was getting into an outcome independent zone where I was genuinely having fun making new friends and being social. It left me open to escalating at the right time without being concerned about rejection.
3) Making out doesn't always ruin your chances for sex later. If anything, I can see where the tension of making out without getting to sex over and over can amp up a girl's arousal. I would even venture to say that just escalating wildly in a public place that's semi-secluded can turn a girl on to the point of removing all LMR later.
4) The general atmosphere of the party bus on a major romantic holiday made things way easier.
5) The particular girl I met was obviously planning to take the right guy home (she even took care of the logistics) so I don't have any sudden delusions that I'm some kind of pickup god now.
6) I want to go on another bar bus!
