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FR “Strong Attraction, No Pull: Noticing a Pattern in My Night Game”

JSerene

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Yooo, sup guys! This is going to be my first time posting on the forum—or any forum at all, actually lol—so I hope this is a decent read at least.

TL;DR at the bottom if you're short on time. Thanks, ChatGPT, for that one lol.


I guess to get straight to the point, I’ve been noticing a very consistent trend lately as I develop my game. It’s been more of a night-game issue than a day-game one, and this FR is going to give some examples of what I mean. I’ve been giving off some kind of danger signal, or at least some form of a seduction break. It’s like a girl is totally down for almost anything, and then at some point in the interaction, she suddenly gets suspicious. The feeling is like she’s reading a good book, something happens, and it takes her out of it—and you don’t know exactly why. I’m sure I’m doing something wrong.


Overall, the night was still a success in my book because my main goal was to practice getting compliance from women as a recovering nice guy.

Alright, now time for the story!


12/20/25


I’m waking up from a nap after a pretty brutal workday. I was hungover because I went out the night before for a friend’s surprise birthday party. That was fun—got some girls to buy me and my friend drinks at the club later ;)—but that would have to be its own FR lol. The point is, I was pretty tired. I really didn’t feel like going out, but if I want to get good, I’ve got to go. At least that’s what I tell myself.


I play some music at my place, clean up a bit, and try to relax into my vibe—get into state, I guess. Then I head out.


I decided to try this place that recently reopened after being shut down for about a month. It’s some new Christmas lounge or whatever, but since I’ve kind of been there before, I know what to expect layout-wise. I get there, and I’m kinda disappointed because I was hoping to see some of the old workers, but no dice. I walk up the stairs and bam—it’s dead as fuck on a Saturday night.


I briefly consider leaving immediately because another spot nearby looked pretty packed, but I decide to grab one drink and chill at the bar for a minute before dipping. I walk around, checking out what’s changed in the venue, keeping my fundamentals in mind—walking slowly, good posture, being strategic with eye contact. There are a couple of cute girls, but they’re really grouped up, and the place is so empty that everyone would see everything. Rejection would hit kinda hard here.


After a short lap, I post up at the bar, watching the dance floor and bobbing to the music. In front of me are three girls, and I don’t know if they were just that drunk or what, but their dancing was pretty fucking bad lol. Almost embarrassing. It honestly made me laugh.


To describe them: one was a blonde, slender girl with a flowery tattoo down her arm. She was really pretty and the hardest to get to open up—definitely the shy type. I’d rate her a personal 7 (5 is average to me, btw). There was a brunette, also skinny, not much of a body, but a pretty face—kind of giving country vibes with her cowboy boots. At first glance I’d say a 6, but later I’d bump her to a 7.5. The third girl was a dirty blonde, I think. I didn’t pay her much attention because I wasn’t attracted. She was overweight and the worst dancer of the three. The way she flopped her hands toward the floor to shake her nonexistent ass was soooo gross to me—2/10.


Of course, I’m kind of smiling in their direction, and the 2/10 makes eye contact with me. She starts walking over and grabs my hand to dance. At first, I resist a little, but I also figure she could be a good opener to meet her cuter friends, so I go with it.


I’m a pretty decent dancer and know how to look good while putting in minimal effort, but I can turn it up if the vibe is there. I’m barely trying while she’s flopping all over the place, trying to lead spins. I reject that, then spin her myself a few times.


Eventually, she does the whole “well, that was fun, see you later” thing, and I interrupt her and ask her name. Let’s call her Abby. Then I ask if those are her friends. She says yes, so I tell her to introduce me and lead her to the bar.


When we get there, I get some auto-rejection vibes. The blonde starts to say the “we’re not interested” line, but I jump in with a friendly “hey, nice to meet you.” Abby introduces the brunette as Katie and the blonde as Emily (not their real names).


Turns out it’s Emily’s birthday, which is fun. Just a girls’ night—drinking and dancing. After chatting a bit, a good song comes on and they head to the dance floor. I get the vibe that they’re trying to stick me with the ugly friend, so I peel off to “explore the venue” lol.


I end up chatting with a door guy I know from before the reopen, which relaxes my vibe a bit. After a while, I head back, and Abby pulls me into dancing again. Gross. Luckily, the others join in too. To my surprise, Katie starts giving me sexy eyes.


We dance, escalate subtly, and it starts to feel like we’re the only two in the room. Abby keeps interrupting, which kills the vibe, but we laugh it off. I didn’t want to be rude and ruin my chances.


Katie says she wants a drink, so I walk her to the bar. She asks what I drink, I hand her my can, and she orders the same. We cheers. The crowd grows, and Katie gets more comfortable dancing close and baiting kisses. I resist because of the advice from the site. She's doing the Hitch, 80% and I just give her a knowing smile. She grinds on me, which turns me on. I think, do I want her to feel my full erection, or will that scare her off? Not sure if that’s dumb lol.


Abby comes in again and ruins the moment. I step back to the bar to cool off.


To my right was a couple: a tall but not very attractive man with a kind of defeated, cuck look to him—no hard feelings toward the guy, that was just his vibe lol. The woman was short, maybe 5’2”, with black hair and almost a Hispanic look to her, and a bitch face that would make any man duck for cover. She was still pretty, though, even if she looked like she was in her mid-40s. I’m sure she noticed me and made some eyes toward me while the guy just stared off in the other direction. She looked at me, smiled, then went back to ordering some complicated drink and told the guy to pay for it. She said a few things to me, but I can’t really recall exactly what—just that it all oozed “look at me” vibes.


At some point, the blonde girl Emily walks back to the bar, and I try to engage her a bit, but good god, it was cold. No eye contact at all and one- or two-word answers to everything. It wasn’t like she disliked my presence; it just felt like she was actively trying to avoid liking me or something. Not sure—didn’t really care too much tbh. At some point, short and spicy walked away, I think to the bathroom.


I noticed Katie talking to some other guys around, but I didn’t care much because in my mind, I was leaving soon anyway. I guess she got bored with them—probably because they aren’t readers of this great site—and she came back with Abby in tow.


Abby had fallen on the ground about two times at this point and was looking sloppier by the minute. She came over to my right and spilled a drink all over the bar. Hot and Spicy was not going to be happy when she got back lol.


Abby then asks me what I want to drink and says she’ll take care of it. I say, “No, you just spilled this drink—you have to buy them another one as a sorry.” Of course, cuck man overhears and says, “No, it’s okay,” all sheepish.


That’s when Hot and Spicy walks back and, of course, she’s pissed. She looks at me and goes, “You’re buying me another drink, right?” I’m like, “Fuck no.” She says, “Well, that’s your friend, so you should take care of it.” I tell her, “We just met, and she’s going to pay for it.”


She asks, “How are you going to do that?” I say, “She will.” After a little back and forth, Abby did.


About 2 minutes later, Katie dances in front of me again, with heavy eye contact. I go to dance with her. We dance closely, hold each other, and I tell her I want to be alone with her. She just shakes her head and keeps dancing. A few minutes later, she forces a makeout. We kiss, and some asian woman comments that we look like a romance movie, which is funny. Abby interrupts again, grinding on me. A bouncer tells me, “You’re the man!” but I know I’m not pulling at this point.


Katie gets too drunk, it’s nearly 2 a.m., and things shut down between the girls and me. I dance with a random cool guy, spot a 9/10 blonde staff member stealing glances, but approaching would have a pretty low success rate, at least I think. I leave empty-handed and call it.


Not done yet, though. I hit an after-hours spot that's open until 5:30 a.m.

I get to the venue, and as I’m walking, some chick is super into me, but she’s not really my type, and it’s cold as fuck, so I kind of rush her along with me and get inside. I wait for a second, but she takes too long, so I get bored and start walking around the venue, getting my bearings.


Eventually, I see two girls sitting on a couch and ask if I can sit with them. They both look like rave girls, like they just got out of a concert. I sit down, then turn, and both of them are just staring at me. I go, “heyy,” “sup.”


One has a kinda pretty face, body kinda meh—so like a 6—and the other is an overweight 2. They introduce themselves as Moon and Star. Moon is the 6. They tell me about the concert they went to and mention they were doing ketamine, then eventually offer me some. It was my first time. Don’t do drugs, kids lol. It was an interesting high, but fun.


Eventually, we went to their car because they wanted weed. They eventually tell me they’re looking for a cheap place to stay. My place is only about 18 minutes away, so I offer my couch, and they both agree. Star tells Moon to get my number.


We walk back to the venue and head to the smoking area. We smoke a little, and they start talking about how their car is fucked up and that they probably shouldn’t drive it. Hearing that, the nice-boy side of me comes out, and I say something like, “If you want, I can drive you to my place and then drop you off in the morning, especially if you’re going to be fucked up on drugs.” I didn’t say that verbatim, but something like that.


After that, the vibe shifts hard. Moon gets up from next to me and sits on the other side of Star. I think I hear her whisper, “I know what he’s trying to do.” I make a what-the-fuck-are-you-talking-about face, and then they start whispering to each other. Rarely a good sign for a seduction. After that, they completely shut down.


I walk with them to the dance floor, but they aren’t saying anything to me. I get super bored, tell them I’m going to be back, and go to the bathroom. When I come out, they’re gone. I take that as a good opportunity to look for someone more fun.


As I’m walking around the venue, just outside the dance floor, I catch the eye of a woman in a sexy red dress, whom I initially take as some form of Hispanic. We lock eyes, and I make my way over immediately. I’m not even sure what we said at first, but she goes right into my arms.


She starts insisting I must be gay and that I need to stop messing with her. Then she says she has a boyfriend and can’t talk to me. She tells me she’s not a good person and that she’s crazy lol. At some point, she randomly tells me she’s Ukrainian. The entire time, we never stop looking into each other’s eyes. Whenever I try to break, she moves back into my line of sight.


I tell her to move over with me because we’re too close to the dance floor and keep bumping into people. We step to the side, and she continues saying I’m just fucking with her and that I’m actually gay. This entire time, I’m not really saying much—just seductively smiling, dancing and feeling her up. I’m grabbing her all over, and she’s saying, “Stop, you're just messing with me,” but whenever I do stop, she pulls me back in.


At that point, I try suggesting we leave together. She says no and brings up her boyfriend again, and her friends she’s with. I pull back a bit, and she chases a little more. Then I tell her to take the cup I’m holding and set it on a table nearby. She looks at me and says, “I’ll do it for you,” but before she does, she stops and says, “Let me guess—you’re going to leave when I turn around, huh?” She says it three more times.


I get impatient and pull her over to the table and set the cup down myself. Don’t think I should’ve done that, now that I think about it.


After that, I have her follow me to a different spot in the same area, and we keep dancing the same way as before. This time, though, when I start physically escalating, she pulls back a bit more and says, “Let me just dance. You're not letting me dance.” I back off, then she pulls me back in again.


I try for a pull again, but she resists, saying I’m gay. I say, “That can be our cover story.” After that line, I felt a bit of a change. After a little more dancing, she says she needs to find her friends and wishes the best for the girl who ends up going home with me, still with that same flirty, aggressive energy.


Some other things happened that night, but the next girl I met was already way too drunk. After that, I was just enjoying the wildness of the rest of the night, and that was the end of any real seduction opportunities.


I know for a fact I could’ve pulled the Ukrainian girl. I did something that broke the spell. Same with Moon and Star, though that felt more out of my control there.



TL;DR:

I went out tired but committed to practicing. At a mostly empty Christmas lounge, I met a group of three girls through the least attractive one, built a strong attraction with her friend Katie through dancing and eventually making out, but constant interruptions, alcohol, and no isolation killed the pull. Later at an after-hours spot, I vibed with two rave girls who were open at first, but when I offered my couch and help with logistics, the vibe flipped, and they shut down. I then had intense, push-pull chemistry with a Ukrainian girl—lots of eye contact, physical escalation, and tension—but when I suggested leaving together, she pulled back and eventually exited despite clear attraction. Overall, plenty of attraction, no pull.

My current theory is that my compliance ladder isn’t smooth enough. Asking to go home feels abrupt and unplanned. I need better venue switches or bigger compliance steps.


Overall, still a fun night, and I feel closer than ever to my first same-night lay.

Some background: I’ve been taking this pretty seriously for about five months now, going out at least every weekend. At this point, I’ve probably done 40–50 night-game approaches and maybe 20 day-game approaches. I’ve gotten two lays since I made this account. I'm still an early beginner, but the experience has been amazing so far, even with the heartache. I can only thank Chase and all the guys here for that. I still have a long way to go, but I’m having a blast going out and look forward to improving and becoming a true seducer one day. For now, I’ll just enjoy the journey and hope I can meet some like-minded dudes out there so we can give women the experiences they thought they could only get in a romance novel.

Hope someone found this helpful. Any advice is appreciated. Thanks for reading. Not sure when I’ll post again, but I’ll be out in the field.


Good seducing, my friends!
 

Francis

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 27, 2023
Messages
1,970
lol nice job getting out there... sounds like quite an interesting night full of characters.

Katie gets too drunk
that's a shame...

spot a 9/10 blonde staff member stealing glances, but approaching would have a pretty low success rate, at least I think
au contraire, mon frere... have you read about preselection yet? this could have been your highest probability, plus the place was nearing close.

mention they were doing ketamine, then eventually offer me some. It was my first time
hey man please be very careful with that kind of thing... taking drugs from random girls you just met could get you in a hairy situation. especially a first time trying something like that. you have no idea what's actually in it.

They eventually tell me they’re looking for a cheap place to stay. My place is only about 18 minutes away, so I offer my couch
also a very dangerous thing to do. even if they weren't high on drugs, you should basically assume they are going to rifle through all your shit when you are sleeping. if you're going to take risks like that, it might be good to get a safe or something discreet where you get put your wallet and keys, etc. not to mention whatever other personal stuff is in your place. if you have a room with your computer, lock the door, etc. look around your place and stress test it.

to be honest they were kind of right to bail on you if you didn't get to know each other at all and offered a place before they earned it in any way. it's kind of clear you are only doing it to try to get laid, like a guy that is too easy (doing a "nice" thing in exchange for sex, as you seem aware to be fair!).

girl is totally down for almost anything, and then at some point in the interaction, she suddenly gets suspicious
could be lack of comfort building. might help to look up articles on screening and qualifying. basically having her earn your interest, getting her invested in the interaction. the bubble can burst. states can shift.

are you in Europe? where are places open until 5:30am lol
 

Francis

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 27, 2023
Messages
1,970
sexy red dress, whom I initially take as some form of Hispanic. We lock eyes, and I make my way over immediately. I’m not even sure what we said at first, but she goes right into my arms.
oh and this one sounds like a trip lol. maybe more dominantly leading the interaction forward in a strong way could have worked with her.

quite the night!
 

JSerene

Rookie
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Joined
Aug 2, 2025
Messages
3
au contraire, mon frere... have you read about preselection yet? this could have been your highest probability, plus the place was nearing close.

Soooo right, my friend, maybe I should have at least done a body rock or something at least lol.
also a very dangerous thing to do. even if they weren't high on drugs, you should basically assume they are going to rifle through all your shit when you are sleeping. if you're going to take risks like that, it might be good to get a safe or something discreet where you get put your wallet and keys, etc. not to mention whatever other personal stuff is in your place. if you have a room with your computer, lock the door, etc. look around your place and stress test it.

to be honest they were kind of right to bail on you if you didn't get to know each other at all and offered a place before they earned it in any way. it's kind of clear you are only doing it to try to get laid, like a guy that is too easy (doing a "nice" thing in exchange for sex, as you seem aware to be fair!).
We did do a little more rapport building than I described here, just for brevity, but you are still absolutely correct here! I'm def being risky when there is no real point. I also shouldn't do nice things for women if they didn't earn it. Some great points here, and I'm taking them to heart for sure!

could be lack of comfort building. might help to look up articles on screening and qualifying. basically having her earn your interest, getting her invested in the interaction. the bubble can burst. states can shift.

are you in Europe? where are places open until 5:30am lol
This is a huge problem for me right now and is something I'm trying to work on in field. I see some pretty eyes and a cute smile, and I can feel myself giving in to try and please her. I'm way too nice, and I think it gives off that he's just trying to sleep with me vibe vs giving the woman the feeling of I need to earn his affection. I'm still too easy, I think, just from lack of experience; I still get too high off female validation and am still afraid to lose it.

Also, I'm in the States, there's a place in my city that is kinda unknown, it's an after-hours rave spot. A great place to get some extra reps in before turning in, you know.
 

Francis

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Mar 27, 2023
Messages
1,970
body rock
maybe! that is when you position yourself as if passing by or about to leave. it reduces the pressure by acting as a non-verbal "false time constraint", meaning she feels like you have somewhere else to be and are not coming in clingy, which in turn lowers her guard.

I also shouldn't do nice things for women if they didn't earn it
definitely not nice things that can put you at that level of risk!

I can feel myself giving in to try and please her. I'm way too nice
given that you are aware of it, hopefully it sorts itself out quick as you get reference experiences showing it doesn't work. the sting of rejection will basically train it out of you. I would recommend searching articles for words like "supplicating" and "I am the prize". the whole "get girls chasing you" tagline thing is the whole essence... flipping the script so she is the one proving herself to you instead. this plays out more in qualification and deep diving when seated or on a date, so be sure to keep it flirty at the beginning.

gives off that he's just trying to sleep with me vibe vs giving the woman the feeling of I need to earn his affection. I'm still too easy, I think, just from lack of experience; I still get too high off female validation and am still afraid to lose it.
you're going to be fine! scarce resources will have an inflated sense of value only until they are no longer perceived as scarce.

keep it up! and please keep posting field reports. a lot of the more experienced guys will love to see good detailed night game reports. it's rare, and they will help you. it will accelerate your progress for sure.
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
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Jan 24, 2021
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2,529
Yooo, sup guys! This is going to be my first time posting on the forum—or any forum at all, actually lol—so I hope this is a decent read at least.

TL;DR at the bottom if you're short on time. Thanks, ChatGPT, for that one lol.


I guess to get straight to the point, I’ve been noticing a very consistent trend lately as I develop my game. It’s been more of a night-game issue than a day-game one, and this FR is going to give some examples of what I mean. I’ve been giving off some kind of danger signal, or at least some form of a seduction break. It’s like a girl is totally down for almost anything, and then at some point in the interaction, she suddenly gets suspicious. The feeling is like she’s reading a good book, something happens, and it takes her out of it—and you don’t know exactly why. I’m sure I’m doing something wrong.


Overall, the night was still a success in my book because my main goal was to practice getting compliance from women as a recovering nice guy.

Alright, now time for the story!


12/20/25


I’m waking up from a nap after a pretty brutal workday. I was hungover because I went out the night before for a friend’s surprise birthday party. That was fun—got some girls to buy me and my friend drinks at the club later ;)—but that would have to be its own FR lol. The point is, I was pretty tired. I really didn’t feel like going out, but if I want to get good, I’ve got to go. At least that’s what I tell myself.


I play some music at my place, clean up a bit, and try to relax into my vibe—get into state, I guess. Then I head out.


I decided to try this place that recently reopened after being shut down for about a month. It’s some new Christmas lounge or whatever, but since I’ve kind of been there before, I know what to expect layout-wise. I get there, and I’m kinda disappointed because I was hoping to see some of the old workers, but no dice. I walk up the stairs and bam—it’s dead as fuck on a Saturday night.


I briefly consider leaving immediately because another spot nearby looked pretty packed, but I decide to grab one drink and chill at the bar for a minute before dipping. I walk around, checking out what’s changed in the venue, keeping my fundamentals in mind—walking slowly, good posture, being strategic with eye contact. There are a couple of cute girls, but they’re really grouped up, and the place is so empty that everyone would see everything. Rejection would hit kinda hard here.


After a short lap, I post up at the bar, watching the dance floor and bobbing to the music. In front of me are three girls, and I don’t know if they were just that drunk or what, but their dancing was pretty fucking bad lol. Almost embarrassing. It honestly made me laugh.


To describe them: one was a blonde, slender girl with a flowery tattoo down her arm. She was really pretty and the hardest to get to open up—definitely the shy type. I’d rate her a personal 7 (5 is average to me, btw). There was a brunette, also skinny, not much of a body, but a pretty face—kind of giving country vibes with her cowboy boots. At first glance I’d say a 6, but later I’d bump her to a 7.5. The third girl was a dirty blonde, I think. I didn’t pay her much attention because I wasn’t attracted. She was overweight and the worst dancer of the three. The way she flopped her hands toward the floor to shake her nonexistent ass was soooo gross to me—2/10.


Of course, I’m kind of smiling in their direction, and the 2/10 makes eye contact with me. She starts walking over and grabs my hand to dance. At first, I resist a little, but I also figure she could be a good opener to meet her cuter friends, so I go with it.


I’m a pretty decent dancer and know how to look good while putting in minimal effort, but I can turn it up if the vibe is there. I’m barely trying while she’s flopping all over the place, trying to lead spins. I reject that, then spin her myself a few times.


Eventually, she does the whole “well, that was fun, see you later” thing, and I interrupt her and ask her name. Let’s call her Abby. Then I ask if those are her friends. She says yes, so I tell her to introduce me and lead her to the bar.


When we get there, I get some auto-rejection vibes. The blonde starts to say the “we’re not interested” line, but I jump in with a friendly “hey, nice to meet you.” Abby introduces the brunette as Katie and the blonde as Emily (not their real names).


Turns out it’s Emily’s birthday, which is fun. Just a girls’ night—drinking and dancing. After chatting a bit, a good song comes on and they head to the dance floor. I get the vibe that they’re trying to stick me with the ugly friend, so I peel off to “explore the venue” lol.


I end up chatting with a door guy I know from before the reopen, which relaxes my vibe a bit. After a while, I head back, and Abby pulls me into dancing again. Gross. Luckily, the others join in too. To my surprise, Katie starts giving me sexy eyes.


We dance, escalate subtly, and it starts to feel like we’re the only two in the room. Abby keeps interrupting, which kills the vibe, but we laugh it off. I didn’t want to be rude and ruin my chances.


Katie says she wants a drink, so I walk her to the bar. She asks what I drink, I hand her my can, and she orders the same. We cheers. The crowd grows, and Katie gets more comfortable dancing close and baiting kisses. I resist because of the advice from the site. She's doing the Hitch, 80% and I just give her a knowing smile. She grinds on me, which turns me on. I think, do I want her to feel my full erection, or will that scare her off? Not sure if that’s dumb lol.


Abby comes in again and ruins the moment. I step back to the bar to cool off.


To my right was a couple: a tall but not very attractive man with a kind of defeated, cuck look to him—no hard feelings toward the guy, that was just his vibe lol. The woman was short, maybe 5’2”, with black hair and almost a Hispanic look to her, and a bitch face that would make any man duck for cover. She was still pretty, though, even if she looked like she was in her mid-40s. I’m sure she noticed me and made some eyes toward me while the guy just stared off in the other direction. She looked at me, smiled, then went back to ordering some complicated drink and told the guy to pay for it. She said a few things to me, but I can’t really recall exactly what—just that it all oozed “look at me” vibes.


At some point, the blonde girl Emily walks back to the bar, and I try to engage her a bit, but good god, it was cold. No eye contact at all and one- or two-word answers to everything. It wasn’t like she disliked my presence; it just felt like she was actively trying to avoid liking me or something. Not sure—didn’t really care too much tbh. At some point, short and spicy walked away, I think to the bathroom.


I noticed Katie talking to some other guys around, but I didn’t care much because in my mind, I was leaving soon anyway. I guess she got bored with them—probably because they aren’t readers of this great site—and she came back with Abby in tow.


Abby had fallen on the ground about two times at this point and was looking sloppier by the minute. She came over to my right and spilled a drink all over the bar. Hot and Spicy was not going to be happy when she got back lol.


Abby then asks me what I want to drink and says she’ll take care of it. I say, “No, you just spilled this drink—you have to buy them another one as a sorry.” Of course, cuck man overhears and says, “No, it’s okay,” all sheepish.


That’s when Hot and Spicy walks back and, of course, she’s pissed. She looks at me and goes, “You’re buying me another drink, right?” I’m like, “Fuck no.” She says, “Well, that’s your friend, so you should take care of it.” I tell her, “We just met, and she’s going to pay for it.”


She asks, “How are you going to do that?” I say, “She will.” After a little back and forth, Abby did.


About 2 minutes later, Katie dances in front of me again, with heavy eye contact. I go to dance with her. We dance closely, hold each other, and I tell her I want to be alone with her. She just shakes her head and keeps dancing. A few minutes later, she forces a makeout. We kiss, and some asian woman comments that we look like a romance movie, which is funny. Abby interrupts again, grinding on me. A bouncer tells me, “You’re the man!” but I know I’m not pulling at this point.


Katie gets too drunk, it’s nearly 2 a.m., and things shut down between the girls and me. I dance with a random cool guy, spot a 9/10 blonde staff member stealing glances, but approaching would have a pretty low success rate, at least I think. I leave empty-handed and call it.


Not done yet, though. I hit an after-hours spot that's open until 5:30 a.m.

I get to the venue, and as I’m walking, some chick is super into me, but she’s not really my type, and it’s cold as fuck, so I kind of rush her along with me and get inside. I wait for a second, but she takes too long, so I get bored and start walking around the venue, getting my bearings.


Eventually, I see two girls sitting on a couch and ask if I can sit with them. They both look like rave girls, like they just got out of a concert. I sit down, then turn, and both of them are just staring at me. I go, “heyy,” “sup.”


One has a kinda pretty face, body kinda meh—so like a 6—and the other is an overweight 2. They introduce themselves as Moon and Star. Moon is the 6. They tell me about the concert they went to and mention they were doing ketamine, then eventually offer me some. It was my first time. Don’t do drugs, kids lol. It was an interesting high, but fun.


Eventually, we went to their car because they wanted weed. They eventually tell me they’re looking for a cheap place to stay. My place is only about 18 minutes away, so I offer my couch, and they both agree. Star tells Moon to get my number.


We walk back to the venue and head to the smoking area. We smoke a little, and they start talking about how their car is fucked up and that they probably shouldn’t drive it. Hearing that, the nice-boy side of me comes out, and I say something like, “If you want, I can drive you to my place and then drop you off in the morning, especially if you’re going to be fucked up on drugs.” I didn’t say that verbatim, but something like that.


After that, the vibe shifts hard. Moon gets up from next to me and sits on the other side of Star. I think I hear her whisper, “I know what he’s trying to do.” I make a what-the-fuck-are-you-talking-about face, and then they start whispering to each other. Rarely a good sign for a seduction. After that, they completely shut down.


I walk with them to the dance floor, but they aren’t saying anything to me. I get super bored, tell them I’m going to be back, and go to the bathroom. When I come out, they’re gone. I take that as a good opportunity to look for someone more fun.


As I’m walking around the venue, just outside the dance floor, I catch the eye of a woman in a sexy red dress, whom I initially take as some form of Hispanic. We lock eyes, and I make my way over immediately. I’m not even sure what we said at first, but she goes right into my arms.


She starts insisting I must be gay and that I need to stop messing with her. Then she says she has a boyfriend and can’t talk to me. She tells me she’s not a good person and that she’s crazy lol. At some point, she randomly tells me she’s Ukrainian. The entire time, we never stop looking into each other’s eyes. Whenever I try to break, she moves back into my line of sight.


I tell her to move over with me because we’re too close to the dance floor and keep bumping into people. We step to the side, and she continues saying I’m just fucking with her and that I’m actually gay. This entire time, I’m not really saying much—just seductively smiling, dancing and feeling her up. I’m grabbing her all over, and she’s saying, “Stop, you're just messing with me,” but whenever I do stop, she pulls me back in.


At that point, I try suggesting we leave together. She says no and brings up her boyfriend again, and her friends she’s with. I pull back a bit, and she chases a little more. Then I tell her to take the cup I’m holding and set it on a table nearby. She looks at me and says, “I’ll do it for you,” but before she does, she stops and says, “Let me guess—you’re going to leave when I turn around, huh?” She says it three more times.


I get impatient and pull her over to the table and set the cup down myself. Don’t think I should’ve done that, now that I think about it.


After that, I have her follow me to a different spot in the same area, and we keep dancing the same way as before. This time, though, when I start physically escalating, she pulls back a bit more and says, “Let me just dance. You're not letting me dance.” I back off, then she pulls me back in again.


I try for a pull again, but she resists, saying I’m gay. I say, “That can be our cover story.” After that line, I felt a bit of a change. After a little more dancing, she says she needs to find her friends and wishes the best for the girl who ends up going home with me, still with that same flirty, aggressive energy.


Some other things happened that night, but the next girl I met was already way too drunk. After that, I was just enjoying the wildness of the rest of the night, and that was the end of any real seduction opportunities.


I know for a fact I could’ve pulled the Ukrainian girl. I did something that broke the spell. Same with Moon and Star, though that felt more out of my control there.



TL;DR:

I went out tired but committed to practicing. At a mostly empty Christmas lounge, I met a group of three girls through the least attractive one, built a strong attraction with her friend Katie through dancing and eventually making out, but constant interruptions, alcohol, and no isolation killed the pull. Later at an after-hours spot, I vibed with two rave girls who were open at first, but when I offered my couch and help with logistics, the vibe flipped, and they shut down. I then had intense, push-pull chemistry with a Ukrainian girl—lots of eye contact, physical escalation, and tension—but when I suggested leaving together, she pulled back and eventually exited despite clear attraction. Overall, plenty of attraction, no pull.

My current theory is that my compliance ladder isn’t smooth enough. Asking to go home feels abrupt and unplanned. I need better venue switches or bigger compliance steps.


Overall, still a fun night, and I feel closer than ever to my first same-night lay.

Some background: I’ve been taking this pretty seriously for about five months now, going out at least every weekend. At this point, I’ve probably done 40–50 night-game approaches and maybe 20 day-game approaches. I’ve gotten two lays since I made this account. I'm still an early beginner, but the experience has been amazing so far, even with the heartache. I can only thank Chase and all the guys here for that. I still have a long way to go, but I’m having a blast going out and look forward to improving and becoming a true seducer one day. For now, I’ll just enjoy the journey and hope I can meet some like-minded dudes out there so we can give women the experiences they thought they could only get in a romance novel.

Hope someone found this helpful. Any advice is appreciated. Thanks for reading. Not sure when I’ll post again, but I’ll be out in the field.


Good seducing, my friends!

First of all, if you've done 70 approaches total and gotten laid twice, as a beginner, that ain't bad!

...

Sounds to me like the problem here is you aren't building a good connection before trying to pull these girls.

With Katie, you danced a lot and made her all hot, but there was no point where you sat her down and built up rapport. That means that when you pull (stop dancing, walk outside, get uber, whatever) there's going to be a big vibe crash. In this case I think she sensed that already and wanted the makeout so she could cash her chips and leave.

I also think you paid too much attention to Abby, and way too little to Emily - who could've ended up throwing a spanner in the works out of spite. She was pissed because you gave tons of attention to the others and none to her. What you should've done imo is engage all three together in conversation as much as possible (especially at the start), while paying slightly more attention to whichever one you really liked as time went on.

...

The girls you offered the couch, again you didn't really build any connection, and also offered way too much (couch, driver, etc) giving them the sense that you didn't really like them but wanted them for something else.

...

The Ukrainian you had a great spark at the start, but again not enough connection, possibly a little unconfident and needy, and she wasn't feeling comfortable enough with you to go home.

When she said "you're not letting me dance" she's saying in other words "you're not just chilling with me and letting me feel good with you", i.e. things are too fast and there's not enough rapport. Her wishing well for the girl you take home is her saying "you're a catch but you couldn't make me feel relaxed enough with you".

...

Sounds to me like you need to work more on deep diving, building rapport, qualifying her, and building a nice little bubble for the two of you so that when you pull she feels safe with you.

And when there's multiple girls don't give too much or too little attention to the other girls, but just enough that they feel noticed and appreciated, so that they can be happy for their friend getting laid.

Anyway congrats on getting this far, and welcome to the boards!
 

JSerene

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Aug 2, 2025
Messages
3
First of all, if you've done 70 approaches total and gotten laid twice, as a beginner, that ain't bad!

...

Sounds to me like the problem here is you aren't building a good connection before trying to pull these girls.

With Katie, you danced a lot and made her all hot, but there was no point where you sat her down and built up rapport. That means that when you pull (stop dancing, walk outside, get uber, whatever) there's going to be a big vibe crash. In this case I think she sensed that already and wanted the makeout so she could cash her chips and leave.

I also think you paid too much attention to Abby, and way too little to Emily - who could've ended up throwing a spanner in the works out of spite. She was pissed because you gave tons of attention to the others and none to her. What you should've done imo is engage all three together in conversation as much as possible (especially at the start), while paying slightly more attention to whichever one you really liked as time went on.

...

The girls you offered the couch, again you didn't really build any connection, and also offered way too much (couch, driver, etc) giving them the sense that you didn't really like them but wanted them for something else.

...

The Ukrainian you had a great spark at the start, but again not enough connection, possibly a little unconfident and needy, and she wasn't feeling comfortable enough with you to go home.

When she said "you're not letting me dance" she's saying in other words "you're not just chilling with me and letting me feel good with you", i.e. things are too fast and there's not enough rapport. Her wishing well for the girl you take home is her saying "you're a catch but you couldn't make me feel relaxed enough with you".

...

Sounds to me like you need to work more on deep diving, building rapport, qualifying her, and building a nice little bubble for the two of you so that when you pull she feels safe with you.

And when there's multiple girls don't give too much or too little attention to the other girls, but just enough that they feel noticed and appreciated, so that they can be happy for their friend getting laid.

Anyway congrats on getting this far, and welcome to the boards!
Okay, this completely shifted how I’m looking at the night. You’re 100% right. Fuck—I genuinely hadn’t considered that angle. I think I mentally checked out of verbals and connection-building at these venues because the music is so loud, and I wrote that part of the interaction off too early.

I also realize that lately I’ve been so focused on correcting my “overly nice” tendencies—trying not to fall into people-pleasing—that I’ve actually neglected building connections altogether. In trying to fix one problem, I created another.

Looking back, I could’ve easily led these girls to a quieter area and done some solid connection-building, which would’ve completely shifted the dynamic in my favor if done right.

I also need to find a new tone for how I build connections. Right now, it can come off too “nice guy” or boyfriend-ish. I think that’s partly due to asking the wrong questions and missing that masculine, flirty frame. That’s something I’ll need to reflect on and read into so I can integrate it properly. I can already tell this insight alone is going to improve my game.

Your comment put a lot of my recent experiences into a new context. I’m thinking back to times when I did build connections but lacked strong leadership—being too sweet, not making girls invest or work for my interest. Even then, I still managed to get decently far, which says a lot about how powerful a connection can be when combined with attraction.

I’m starting to see the skeleton of a repeatable seduction process that actually feels natural and sustainable for me. It really is all about balance.

Thanks for taking the time to write that and for the encouragement, man. It hasn’t been easy, but it’s been a fun journey so far. I’ll try to post more when I can—this was insanely valuable.
 
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