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Getting a girl who lives in a different state

michaelking23

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There’s this girl who lives in a state over from me. I found her on Instagram when somebody I know from my city posted a picture of her. We have about 20-30 mutual friends/followers, and she is the same religion and is in my religious community. (In My religious community, my friends from my city know tons of other people from our religion in neighboring states.)

I thought she was hot, I followed her and she followed back.

I’ve heard good things about her from my friends, so I’m interested in trying to bed her and even relationship if shit works out- but the issue is she lives in a different state a few hours away, so I’ll probably never meet her.

I have replied to one of her stories, but the convo didn’t really lead to anything and was short.

I also post a lot of the stuff I do for my work onto my stories and, which she sees often. I always get people telling me I do really dope shit in life (travel, my celebrity clients, exotic cars, etc) and have a bunch of people admire me for that lol. So I think that helps with her seeing me as someone who isn’t a regular guy and that I stand out.

I probaly wont get anything out of this, because she lives a few hours away, but if any of you guys could help me out with some guidance on if I should DM her or just leave it be. I’m a lot better at gaming in person rather than DM!

Looking forward to hearing your guys takes.
 
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Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
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If you wanted to go visit her THIS WEEK. Could you pull it off? If so then I would pursue her like a girl in your city.

I managed to get a woman to spend a weekend with me whom I'd never met in person before. We both went into it with a mindset of it was going to be a one time thing and a little over 3 years later she moved in with me. We met monthly for 3 years, and she stayed 2 summers with me and it worked. But it worked because I could leave for a weekend and be in her city in less than 4 hours.

So I am the one in a million where an LDR worked out (so far). But she was down for an adventure and could make a visit work.

If you are going to try to pull off a rendezvous, I'd recommend a location away from friends and family where oyu don't have to worry about interruptions or explaining who each other is . Make it a honeymoon of sorts.
 

Seppuku

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I agree with Fuck This. The longer you wait the thinner your chances become. So free up some time asap and try.

The way I usually go to meet girls long distance, is I first float the idea of meeting and see the buying temperature. Something like "I have been thinking of visiting your city for some time. We should really meet for a drink". (drink or whatever suits you). See if you get some enthusiastic reaction. If you have anything remotely positive, then go on with the plan.

You get out of the radar a few days. Or up to a week. Then come back:

"I will be in your city on coming Friday, until Tuesday. Let's do this drink. Let me know what is convenient for you." (or whatever dates range fits your schedule. Ideally the range should be a few days long, so she can pick a convenient time). The thing about this is, she knows it's now or never, so usually if she's interested she will free up some time to meet you. That's the great thing about meeting girls when you're traveling: there's a built-in time constraint. It actually works in your favor.

If you get anything along the lines of "I will let you know", you have to be firm. "No. It is a very short time frame with a busy schedule, so I need to know now." You understand that if you are going all the way to meet her, there is no room to wiggle. Never be afraid of being firm with a girl when it's justified.

Now if she tells you a time she's available, then you don't have to actually free up 3 or 4 days (Friday to Tuesday in my example). You can just come a little bit in advance for the date.

Chances are you will need to stay overnight. So you have to find a suitable hotel. Ideally, your hotel has a lounge bar or similar. That will be the perfect setup for the date. When you guys have connected for one or two hours, just tell her "let's bring our glasses in my room and listen to some music on Youtube." The perfect pull. Your room is two minutes away by the elevator.

And I have done just exactly that back in 2017, with the girl who is currently my girlfriend. Probably my most beautiful girl ever. We met at the pool bar in my hotel. A couple of hours later we moved to my bedroom. It was an awesome time in bed. We both still remember it fondly. She told me later "it was the perfect date". I never regretted the money on this hotel room.

This stuff actually works.

Good luck!
Seppuku
PS. What I had done to maximize my potential return on investment, is I had also booked another date with a second girl, during that weekend. So that, if it doesn't work with one, I get a second chance with another. Eventually, the second girl worked well too (with the same scenario), so I ended up fucking two beautiful girls that weekend. LOL.
 
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michaelking23

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If you wanted to go visit her THIS WEEK. Could you pull it off? If so then I would pursue her like a girl in your city.
Honestly, I couldnt. I havent ever talked to her online, except for the one time where I replied to her story which was a dead convo. I definitely need to start DM'ing then end up facetiming her.

If you are going to try to pull off a rendezvous, I'd recommend a location away from friends and family where oyu don't have to worry about interruptions or explaining who each other is . Make it a honeymoon of sorts.
Makes sense! She goes to college a couple hours away from her hometown, so thats ideal.
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

michaelking23

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The longer you wait the thinner your chances become. So free up some time asap and try.
No doubt! I want to take action now but I've got no experience with starting a conversation with a girl I haven't met before online. I already replied to one of her stories, but the conversation was pretty basic. If you were to DM her for the first time, How would you do it? The good thing is, we have a ton of mutual friends, shes in my religion/community, and she does watch my stories and like my pictures, so its more warm than cold.
he way I usually go to meet girls long distance, is I first float the idea of meeting and see the buying temperature. Something like "I have been thinking of visiting your city for some time. We should really meet for a drink". (drink or whatever suits you). See if you get some enthusiastic reaction. If you have anything remotely positive, then go on with the plan.
I'll for sure use something along those lines when saying I'll come visit. I'll say "Im in your city a few times a year for client work, we should meet for lunch etc."

PS. What I had done to maximize my potential return on investment, is I had also booked another date with a second girl, during that weekend. So that, if it doesn't work with one, I get a second chance with another. Eventually, the second girl worked well too (with the same scenario), so I ended up fucking two beautiful girls that weekend. LOL.
Haha thats dope man. I'll see if I can find another girl in her city and run the same thing, so I can try for two!

Definitely lots of good tips and information from both you guys, I for sure appreciate it! Awesome to hear that these types of things have been done before successfully.

I've got a couple specific questions however, first one being, what would be a good way for me to start talking to her through DM? I obviously wouldn't want to say "Hey beautiful" or some weird shit. If you were to be in my scenario, what would be a few different approaches you would take to starting the convo?

Second thing being this girl is a bit more on the religous/ 'good' girl side. So it would be a bit more difficult- however I know if I play my shit right and if shes interested, she'll definitely want to meet.
 

Seppuku

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Man, and you haven't even messaged her yet?

Ok so first, before making any plans with her, you've got to establish the contact. You can have two outcomes: (i) she replies, or (ii) she ignores. You need to accept that (ii) is very possible, no matter how clever you are. There is no such thing as a smartly crafted text that wins 100%. I say that, because over the years I have seen this belief here and there.

A word of caution. When you're afraid of losing her, that's when you start doing mistakes, such as being slow, being cautious, taking more time, being needy, etc... The key of an efficient seduction is to accept that you may not get her, and live with it, and be bold. Boldness pays more dividends than cautiousness.

The girl I talk about in my previous post here, I met her on Instagram. She had some very sexy and elegant pictures. All the guys were like "hey beautiful", "smoking hot", "dope", "fire", "you're gorgeous" etc... She has hundreds of such guys, and she writes them off instantly. So just like you said, you have absolutely to avoid similar comments. What I did was a succinct, genuine compliment on what she was wearing: "Nice outfit." No creepy emojis, just simple. She was the one to answer directly in my DM with "thanks". That's how we got talking.

I'd suggest you try to get her attention with something similar. Your comment should be genuine and short. Avoid complimenting her physical appearance, more her clothes, her hairstyle, or some nice detail about her. It shows that you are actually looking.

However, she may not answer to your comment, and that's fine.

In second step, you message her in her DM. Something short and simple. I would introduce myself. "Hey! My name is Michael King. You have a very nice page!" Again, no direct compliment on her appearance. You don't want to be written off as "just another thirsty guy".

Good luck.
Seppuku
PS. Ignore the fact that "she might be more conservative" and just proceed as if she wasn't. This stuff works also for more conservative women. However modifying your behavior because of your perception on her being conservative, may actually lose you the girl. Ignore the unhelpful stuff and proceed as normal.
 

michaelking23

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Nope, no message yet. Like you said not to do, I was doing: waiting. lol.

Yup, Im cool if she doesn't reply and accept that as a possiblity. At least I would know now rather than driving a couple hundred miles and getting nothing out of it.

A word of caution. When you're afraid of losing her, that's when you start doing mistakes, such as being slow, being cautious, taking more time, being needy, etc... The key of an efficient seduction is to accept that you may not get her, and live with it, and be bold. Boldness pays more dividends than cautiousness.

Yup and thats exactly what I'm doing and even realized that a while ago. I used to be really bad about this when pulling IRL, but Ive gotten much better at it. Guess its time to 'not be afraid' and be bold over DM too.

She was the one to answer directly in my DM with "thanks". That's how we got talking.
Sounds easy, I'll do that. Now when she replies back with thanks or whatever, how would I continue the convo? Just say "What city you from?" or what? Don't want to make the convo dry and sound like an interrogation, but can't really deep dive right off the bat. Im guessing keep it simple at first then deep dive into her interests and passions etc?

PS. Ignore the fact that "she might be more conservative" and just proceed as if she wasn't. This stuff works also for more conservative women. However modifying your behavior because of your perception on her being conservative, may actually lose you the girl. Ignore the unhelpful stuff and proceed as normal.
Ok will do.

Thanks for the detailed response Seppuku, I definently don't want to make all your effort go to waste so I'll be hitting her up real soon and let you know how it goes :)
 

Seppuku

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Sounds easy, I'll do that. Now when she replies back with thanks or whatever, how would I continue the convo? Just say "What city you from?" or what? Don't want to make the convo dry and sound like an interrogation, but can't really deep dive right off the bat. Im guessing keep it simple at first then deep dive into her interests and passions etc?
In my case, the girl answered to my comment by sending me a DM. But that's more the exception than the rule. So if you comment and she doesn't respond, then you soon follow up (within one or two days) by initiating a DM. "Hey, I'm Mike. You have a nice page!". Simple. Then you let her respond.

When DM convo is initiated (either way), then just keep it simple, conversational. Introduce yourself, ask for her name, where she lives, what she does in life. Simple, basic get-to-know stuff. But don't get lost in the convo. Keep an eye on your goal, namely, to meet her. That's when you will be doing the real deep diving.

In your DM convo, also avoid direct compliments for now. Keep that for when you meet in real. You can say comments on the general appearance such as "classy." or "elegant". But nothing like "you're so beautiful". That would be a turn off for her.

It is better that you give a try and know where you stand now, rather than waiting on the side and speculating. In general, the longer you wait, the harder it is.

If she says no or doesn't answer, then you move on to another girl. If she says yes, you meet her! But at least you know.

OK! good luck and post here your results.
 
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