Hit it off...now need advice

[Jack123Frost]

Hey everyone,

so I need some advice. I went on a date last night and really hit it off with this gal I met on bumble. I didn’t sleep with her, but we had good chemistry, some touching, lots of inside jokes, and we agreed to hang out again and drink by the pool. After the date I gave her my number and she gave me a text. I told her goodnight and haven’t talked since, and unfortunately I will be out of town starting tomorrow and will be out until next Friday. I don’t want to start a dry conversation that lasts a week but I also don’t want her to forget about me and move on.

I know she is headed home this weekend as well. I was thinking of shooting her a message, maybe this Friday, saying enjoy your trip and including an inside joke we have about her hometown. Then, maybe mid next week, texting her to schedule another time to hang out.

how does this sound? Any advice? Also, I saw on bumble that she changed out one or two of her pictures. I’m probably overthinking it, but I was wondering if this mattered much. Thank you, -J

 

[fog]

If you hit it off, why didn't you fuck her?

If you hit it off, why aren't you hitting it off through text? And why would there be a dry conversation through text if you hit it off?

If you hit it off, why would she forget about you?

Are you sure you hit it off, or are your feelings for her getting in the way and skewing your perception?

It sounds bad, especially since you didn't fuck her and youve already ended the only text thread you had going. Good chance of losing her.

Have an interesting text convo that lasts a week and keeps the spark between you two alive until you can meet again

 

[Jack123Frost]

Eh, I’ve had a lot of great relationships with beautiful women where I didn’t fuck them on the first date. If it happens, it’s great, but I had work early in the morning and I wasn’t trying to be tired. By hit it off, I meant there was great conversation, touching, and we agreed to do it again. But yes, thank you for your thoughtful advice, you have some good points

 

[ulrich]

Call her at some point in the week

 

[Jack123Frost]

Call her at some point in the week

Interesting suggestion. Out of the blue?

 

[PalmaSailor]

[Hey everyone,]



[so I need some advice. I went on a date last night and really hit it off with this gal I met on bumble. I didn’t sleep with her, but we had good chemistry, some touching, lots of inside jokes, and we agreed to hang out again and drink by the pool. ]



Good. You know you could have banged her if you had your logistics and escalation right. You might not have had that in place but Just sayin.. and then it would have been halfway sealed..



[After the date I gave her my number and she gave me a text. I told her goodnight and haven’t talked since, and unfortunately I will be out of town starting tomorrow and will be out until next Friday. I don’t want to start a dry conversation that lasts a week but I also don’t want her to forget about me and move on.]



Wise move. If the next date is a week away, it’s not optimal, and texting is likely to run dry. I’d go quiet for at least 3 days and then text only to arrange detail of the meet. Nothing else.



[I know she is headed home this weekend as well. I was thinking of shooting her a message, maybe this Friday, saying enjoy your trip and including an inside joke we have about her hometown. Then, maybe mid next week, texting her to schedule another time to hang out.]



Yeah



[how does this sound? Any advice? Also, I saw on bumble that she changed out one or two of her pictures.]



She’s still hunting. If someone with tighter game than you gets in there and bangs her in the meantime you’ve lost it. That is why you should have escalated on the night and sealed the deal



[I’m probably overthinking it, but I was wondering if this mattered much. Thank you, -J]



You’re not overthinking it. Your gut is telling you she’s still on the hunt and it’s nowhere near a closed deal.

 

[Jack123Frost]

Cool. Good, clear advice. Thank you

 

[Skills]

Eh, I’ve had a lot of great relationships with beautiful women where I didn’t fuck them on the first date. If it happens, it’s great, but I had work early in the morning and I wasn’t trying to be tired. By hit it off, I meant there was great conversation, touching, and we agreed to do it again. But yes, thank you for your thoughtful advice, you have some good points

Just text morning with sun emoji, every day, the reason I like doing this is cause is a ping that subcommunicates I am here, you are on my mind and doesn't require the pressure to engage in a conversation... does the job, yes most of my online dates were second encounter bangs..

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

Hey everyone,

so I need some advice. I went on a date last night and really hit it off with this gal I met on bumble. I didn’t sleep with her, but we had good chemistry, some touching, lots of inside jokes, and we agreed to hang out again and drink by the pool. After the date I gave her my number and she gave me a text. I told her goodnight and haven’t talked since, and unfortunately I will be out of town starting tomorrow and will be out until next Friday. I don’t want to start a dry conversation that lasts a week but I also don’t want her to forget about me and move on.

I know she is headed home this weekend as well. I was thinking of shooting her a message, maybe this Friday, saying enjoy your trip and including an inside joke we have about her hometown. Then, maybe mid next week, texting her to schedule another time to hang out.

how does this sound? Any advice? Also, I saw on bumble that she changed out one or two of her pictures. I’m probably overthinking it, but I was wondering if this mattered much. Thank you, -J

1. Scrub your social media of all your worst stuff, whatever's left makes you look cool.

2. Add her to your social media.

3. Post cool stuff to social media - that is, do actually cool stuff and document it. Which means that in order to bag chicks long term you're going to have to have a life outside of school/work/gym/food pics/selfies.

4. Don't send those type of texts until after you bang and more of an actual relationship has been established

Why? Why social media?

Because you want to stay on her radar without pushing yourself into her life.
Social media is advertising and marketing, but not SALES.

The cooler you look, the more interest you can generate, without being pushy.
Let her sell herself on life with you.

And if you're life isn't cool - that's a bigger issue than trying to bang the girl.

Most of the time, you're gonna run and gun these chicks. But eventually you'll want to give some chick more time in the spotlight.
She needs to fit into your life somehow - but you gotta have a life first.

Of the many changes with running game before 2007 and now, social media is a major one. (One of the other ones is defeating the digital crack pipe she has in her hands at all times)

WIA

 

[PalmaSailor]

Just text morning with sun emoji, every day, the reason I like doing this is cause is a ping that subcommunicates I am here, you are on my mind and doesn't require the pressure to engage in a conversation... does the job, yes most of my online dates were second encounter bangs..

I would t do that - it implies you don’t have any other options and it’s needy.
Clooney or Jack Nicholson wouldn’t do that because they’re too busy banging other women.
That’s ^^ the sub comms you need to be giving off.

 

[PalmaSailor]

1. Scrub your social media of all your worst stuff, whatever's left makes you look cool.

2. Add her to your social media.

3. Post cool stuff to social media - that is, do actually cool stuff and document it. Which means that in order to bag chicks long term you're going to have to have a life outside of school/work/gym/food pics/selfies.

4. Don't send those type of texts until after you bang and more of an actual relationship has been established

Why? Why social media?

Because you want to stay on her radar without pushing yourself into her life.
Social media is advertising and marketing, but not SALES.

The cooler you look, the more interest you can generate, without being pushy.
Let her sell herself on life with you.

And if you're life isn't cool - that's a bigger issue than trying to bang the girl.

Most of the time, you're gonna run and gun these chicks. But eventually you'll want to give some chick more time in the spotlight.
She needs to fit into your life somehow - but you gotta have a life first.

Of the many changes with running game before 2007 and now, social media is a major one. (One of the other ones is defeating the digital crack pipe she has in her hands at all times)

WIA

@Archie

at some point I’m I probably should get some social media

it’s just I find is sooo toxic, and I do well enough without it.

so I’ve been avoiding it… plus I have given myself the challenge of regularly getting with much younger women which seems to be easier in real life

you got any thoughts on that?

 

[Skills]

I would t do that - it implies you don’t have any other options and it’s needy.
Clooney or Jack Nicholson wouldn’t do that because they’re too busy banging other women.
That’s ^^ the sub comms you need to be giving off.

Incorrect it's a ping

 

[PalmaSailor]

Incorrect it's a ping

No I’m correct. It pegs you as thinking of her and needy. Clooney, Nicholson et. al wouldn’t do it bc they’d be too busy banging other women.

it’s a DLV and her hindbrain will interpret it as such.

but hey, you do you if it makes you happy.

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

@Archie

at some point I’m I probably should get some social media

it’s just I find is sooo toxic, and I do well enough without it.

so I’ve been avoiding it… plus I have given myself the challenge of regularly getting with much younger women which seems to be easier in real life

you got any thoughts on that?

It depends on your goals.

A maxed out social media, and even better a maxed out google presence - can go a long way in molding expectations.
Being invisible can scare away lot of chicks.

I don't do online dating apps, but I've met girls that have followed me via social media etc.

For guys at our level, finding chicks online/attracting chicks online is sort of a side dish. But it's helpful on the backend when it comes to vetting and latent attraction.

That said, sealing the deal is still an offline skillset, and it's even more useful these days - because the prime market (18-25) tends to be socially retarded. (delayed growth, unreal expectations, don't know how to act)

WIA

 

[Skills]

No I’m correct. It pegs you as thinking of her and needy. Clooney, Nicholson et. al wouldn’t do it bc they’d be too busy banging other women.

it’s a DLV and her hindbrain will interpret it as such.

but hey, you do you if it makes you happy.

Incorrect I learned this from women, by the way...its a ping fuck those dudes they relay on status ridiculous response

 

[ulrich]

Interesting suggestion. Out of the blue?

Yeah, if you get the feeling your call will be well received, call her.

It’s a pleasant surprise since nobody calls anymore.

 

[ulrich]

No I’m correct. It pegs you as thinking of her and needy. Clooney, Nicholson et. al wouldn’t do it bc they’d be too busy banging other women.

it’s a DLV and her hindbrain will interpret it as such.

but hey, you do you if it makes you happy.

DLV? What is this? 1998?

Texting is only bad if you overdo it.
@Skills knows what he is talking here.

If you go full silence with a girl for one week, that is going to drop your attainability to the floor. I’m talking from experience.

Ping and then reply following calibration is more advanced and better than some “DHV vs DLV” rules.

 

[Velasco]

@uriel

these are two extremes.

going full silence with a girl you just met through cold approach for a whole week VS texting you just met through cold approach every single day. Both strategies hurt your attainability (too unattainable (yours) and too attainable (he's not gonna be able to see her until at least next friday...meaning that'd be 9 "morning" sun emoji's in a row lol (Palma's point)).

The middle ground is what OP is doing. leaving some days in between texts.

 

[PalmaSailor]

It depends on your goals.

A maxed out social media, and even better a maxed out google presence - can go a long way in molding expectations.
Being invisible can scare away lot of chicks.

I don't do online dating apps, but I've met girls that have followed me via social media etc.

For guys at our level, finding chicks online/attracting chicks online is sort of a side dish. But it's helpful on the backend when it comes to vetting and latent attraction.

That said, sealing the deal is still an offline skillset, and it's even more useful these days - because the prime market (18-25) tends to be socially retarded. (delayed growth, unreal expectations, don't know how to act)

WIA

Thanks..
My goal is getting what I want when I want it and I’ve got that for some time now.(with the exception of secret society)
I’ve nailed off the younger thing / it was a personal mindset adjustment as opposed to anything else however on the “to do” list is secret society game and that is to pick off women for sex that are already provisioned.
I don’t have that concluded in the manner I want which is she stays with him but bangs me.
I don’t actually need online anything to get proximity and “leads”
What the boys now call direct approach, we used to call “talking to girls”; and I still do it.
Yeah, it might be very 1988, but I did it back then as well.. lol.
Good luck!

 

[Fuck This]

if you are doing cool things while out of town...send her a pic.