How unique my case is and wanting to slay into older age.

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Maybe I live under a rock at this point because who even knows, maybe this is the post where I need to read @Chase and his article about the end-game for the playboy again, and who knows what is what at this point. Maybe it is because the stress of my job and the reality that soon I might face a layoff is messing with my head.

Every year, I inch closer to 30 and despite the success I have had with women, I feel like when it comes to the social game, sex, hedonism, and all that my drive is still there in a big way. I mean it is tough to explain and maybe it's because I have not spent as much time on this board as usual but just talking to so many men out there, I find that very few genuinely want anything like this after 30.

Weird, but most men I talk to are very happy with marriage, kids, settling down, and living the family man life. It is rare that I find any guy who wants to live like Hugh Hefner or Dan Bilzerian (des[ite the criticism he gets for paying for it all which I would be content with). I sometimes feel like I am the lone guy who in many ways, wants his 30s to be the teenage dream he had of going through different women, partying, fist bumping alphas, and spending the money away like crazy on that thing once he has made it.

In some ways, it makes sense, you make a lot of money and avoid the family/LTR life, perhaps you make friends with nightlife dudes like @Hue and get connected.

People say it gets "old" and maybe it does but after sleeping with 100 different women, I feel like it is not getting old for me.

Threesomes to be had.

Wild exclusive parties to have gone to.

Exclusive higher-end attractive social circles to be a part of.

No doubt I have seen Chase mention this in the past where people use their 20s for this but my 20s have not been as high of a ceiling as I wanted.

I sometimes truly wonder how isolating and how much of a social outcast you end up if after 30, you are a bachelor going hard with various kinds of women out there and partying like you are 21.

I don't even have the money yet but once I get it, that is what I want.

I just really feel as if I am the lone man out there who will be living this life because all of my fellow guys would either be tied down and the rest more than happy to be the Japanese herbivore types....

It's like, the life I want has become a forbidden fruit in America.

 

[Seppuku]

Oh Pry and your good old topic

Yes, I think the hedonist pursuit gets old, but that's me. I had a real fun ride juggling with ladies for five years. It helped me to "exorcise" my divorce. I learned a useful dating skill. I learned lots of female psychology. It was worth it, I learned a lot from it, had a lot of fun, and I would do it again. But there are only so many hours available in the day, and there are so many other things that I find interesting and that I want to accomplish.

I am currently happy with my super hot girlfriend, and don't feel the need to go on multiple dates a week like I used to. I use the freed-up time to pursue other interests.

And no, I am not a Japanese herbivore

Weird, but most men I talk to are very happy with marriage, kids, settling down, and living the family man life.

Well, if you are really adamant that you don't want this for you, just don't do it. Yes, you will feel a pressure from your peers and family to follow that route and "normalize", but if you really don't want it, just don't do it, and nobody will force you. You are the pilot of your own ship.

Nothing will suddenly happen to you on your 30th birthday. You will wake up 30 years old, just the same man you were at 29.99 years.

And you don't suddenly become less attractive - as long as you do not give up on yourself. That's the great thing about being a man. We can continue to be sexually attractive into late age.

And to younger guys wondering, no, it is not just about having money. The men who lose their attractiveness in late age, do so because they gave up on themselves. That is the real caveat to avoid after 30. They stopped trying looking good. They had more whiskies that they could handle. They ate too much good food. They let their weight shoot up in the deep overweight range. They stopped trying looking good. They stopped gym, and those who didn't, did the wrong gym. They settled in comfort and became complacent. They stopped trying. That's what you need to avoid.

I sometimes truly wonder how isolating and how much of a social outcast you end up if after 30, you are a bachelor going hard with various kinds of women out there and partying like you are 21.

You will feel that. But I guess you will also come across the (few) other men out there who are similar to you. They, too, feel that there aren't too many men with similar interest. You will end up making a close circle of friends with them.

What would be stupid however, imho, would be to give up a promising career just for the sake of hedonism - like you have been tempted to. Your career will give you money and social status. Whatever your objectives in life, money and status will be super useful to you. Ask Dan Bilzerian what he thinks about it.


OK good luck with your endeavors.

Seppuku

 

[Teevster]

I don't understand this subject. Pick up is a hobby and has nothing to do with end games.

The problem with this question is that you are giving your hobby too much meaning to your life.

Do you go on a football forum asking about the end game to football?
Or the end-game to cooking on a cooking forum?
Or on ski forum?

No you most likely won't. So why do guys care so much about such subject?

I am closing into 30, and I have been involved in this community since 2007, and been active since then. I have spent half my life almost in this community. And yet... I am not the one asking about the end-game...

Worth considering and reflecting upon.

-Teevster

 

[Carousel]

You are making a lot of threads about almost the exactly same topic. Why not keep all the discussion in one thread?

And what is so magic about exactly 30? Just like you, I was in the PU community at your age. Unlike you, I noticed that a lot of these guys, including gurus, were 35, 40 or even older. Sedfast/Nextasf also had A LOT of men in the 35-45 age range. And so is the case on this forum. And so was the case on MASF. So I have never worried much about age.

Do you actively cultivate some kind of blindspot against this fact?

Also I do not understand why it is important whether this is common or not.

 

[BigPapa]

I think that @Seppuku and @Teevster have a valid point .

Girls are just part of the life and not the end game

you should also take into consideration that maybe life does not have an end game and you should just try to follow your passions as much as you can and always aiming for balance .

if you do not feel like not settling down , then do not settle , the world is full of girls with daddy issues or gold diggers . Sure they are not long term prospects , but in the same time you do not want to settle either haha

 

[Grand Pooba]

You are making a lot of threads about almost the exactly same topic. Why not keep all the discussion in one thread?

this is a valid point, I am tired of seeing the same subject over and over again, there’s nothing new to add that hasn’t already been said.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Dude your always looking to find evidence that what you want in life can't be achieved.

Go figure out where the people with the same values as you hang out at and go crush it together.

When I've attended pickup conferences and self development conferences I've always meet plenty of guys on their early 30's who are crushing the night life scene and living alternative lifestyle other than the 9-5 kids+wife life.

Go find your people.

 

[Skills]

just lol! you and this topic and the many variations to this... I do not want to be like dan or drew haftner, i like more of a private under the radar life...How many ways i have to tell you most guys reach prime between 30 and 38

 

[Carousel]

Weird, but most men I talk to are very happy with marriage, kids, settling down, and living the family man life.

A lot of these guys are likely rationalizing.

Also I do not understand why you talk about this topic like the only alternatives are being a married chode in your 30s or being Hefner/Bilzerian in your 30s. The vast majority of PUAs and players I know are NOT rich, they work in ordinary jobs (if they even work at all). This is also true for the 30-somethings. Flashing too much money may even come off as tryhard or frame you as a provider if you aren't careful.

 

[Grand Pooba]

Weird, but most men I talk to are very happy with marriage, kids, settling down, and living the family man life.

A lot of these guys are likely rationalizing.

In general, everyone likes to project a much rosier picture about their reality to the outside world, than their life actually is. I remember witnessing this with my own parents - their marriage was in complete shambles and they hated each other, constant fighting and bickering and they lived on different floors of the house (not just different rooms, lol). But, in public and in front of friends, they were cordial and together like a couple, and everything looked fine from the outside.

Also, people always like to justify their own stuckness, rather than work hard for what they truly might want. This is satisficing at the end of the day.