FR I have to ask my mom first before going out.

[rabbit]

Recently I've been trying to start approaching girls (mostly daygame) when I was out and about. I'm inexperienced and rather introverted, but an experience from a couple of months ago led me to try and improve this area of my life.
So I met this girl at my gym. Pretty short, with a pair of glasses and braces. I was doing hip thrusts as I saw her in front of me and decided I'd approach. The conversation went pretty smoothly and started by asking her if she was finished with the machine. She was very receptive and smiling. It goes well when I'm genuinely interested in the person (especially when it's a foreigner). When I figured she doesn't speak the local language we started to converse in English.

Turns out she's from Sri Lanka. I asked her about the situation in there since I heard it was still pretty rough out there and she told me it's all right there now. She even starts to work at a travel agency soon and recommended I go there. I joked about her trying to get me killed which in hindsight may not be such a good approach since she has roots there.
Turns out she lives here for over 6 years and lives in a different town (the gym is on the edge of the two, but they're only 15 minutes drive away). After about 5 minutes I ended the conversation by saying it's nice talking to her but I gotta finish my sets, and if I could have her Instagram. She told me she doesn't really use it much but can give me her # instead.

I'm still quite new at this so am unsure if I should ask for a number first. I asked for her name and reached out with my hand but did kinda look at it (which I should remember to avoid)

After I finished the workout I messaged her-

Me: Hey [name]! It was nice meeting you tonight at the gym
I'll be more than glad to teach you a few phrases in [my language] if you teach me some Hindi curses
Lmk if this week works out for you, I'm available mostly on the afternoon and evenings
-[My Name]
Her: Hey. It was nice to meet you too... Actually i'm not speaking hindu. Because it's not my language. We speaks sinhalese in my country. And i'd be glad to teach you some words in my language but I'm kinda busy with this week. May be on friday i'm free because of the holiday.
Me: Oh interesting i didn't know that!
Me: Cool. There's a nice place in [My Town] with coffee and pastries. Or we can go to [Your Town] if you already know a place you like
Her: Yeah it's not really familiar. When someone see me they think I'm speaking hindi.
Her: Is it alright for you if i tell about tomorrow? I'm not usually going out with the guys. So i have to ask my mom first. Kinda stranger for me to go out with people
Me: Oh for sure lol
Me: I thought you were an adult tho
Her: I am... .... but i'm Asian. So i have to tell my mom first
Me: Ok. Technically I am Asian as well so I'll tell them, too. If it's fine with u
Her: How? Where are you from?
Me: [country], of course
Her: No problem at all. It's up to you
Me: I was being sarcastic, dear
Me: You just don't know me enough
Me: But we'll fix it
Her: Lol
Her: We'll see
Me: Anyhow tell her you met a cute weirdo who can teach you some [language] and drink coffee. It's nothing serious
Me: Gotta go charge my phone now, good night!
Her: Good night!

The next evening, she messaged me-

Her: Hey [name]! How are you?
Her: Are you going to gym tonight?
Me: Hey [Misspelled Name]! No I usually don't go day after day
Her: I'm not [Mispelled Name]. *[Correct Name]
Me: Oh yeah sorry
Me: Does mommy only allow you meet people at the gym?
Her: Haha you're funny. She doesn't care about it
Me: Haha okay
Me: Well what did she say??
Her: She's said it's okay. It's up to me though
Me: Cool! So it's basically "Yes"
Her: Yeah!
Me: I assume you're at the gym right now?
Me: Oh you'd only go if I'm there?
Me:
Her: Nooo it's my resting day
Me: Yeah me too. I don't do muscle groups yet
Her: Haha no. I'm not waiting for anyone ... yesterday was my legs day. So i supposed to take a rest today.
Her: It's okay. Take it easy.
Me: I try to
Me: Isn't every day leg day for girls?
Me: And guys only work on the upper?
Her: For me noo....!
Her: Usually i do cardio and upper body too
Me: I could tell you work out btw! Doesn't look like you took too long a break
Me: Anyhow, you said you think Friday morning works out for your schedule?
Her: Yeah. I'm free this Friday. So you have to decide where are we going?
Me: Well there's this nice place 15 minutes away from where I live and I can show you my walking routine
Her: Yeah sure!
Me:
Me: Awesome! So.. 9am? Fri?
Her: Yeah great! But where i supposed to come?
Me: [Adress]
Me: It's open 24 hours and I sometimes go there at night
Me: Actually I'm on the way there now lol. But just to meet other weirdos
Her: Ah cool... have a fun!
Me: Thanks!
Me: Before I go, just one more question
Her: What
Me: Is it convenient for you to arrive there?
Me: Do you have a car?
Her: Nope!
Her: It's okay. I can take a taxi or by bus!
Me: I see
Me: We'll find a solution )
Me: Good night to you, [Name]
Her: Good night

She took a taxi to a coffeeshop 15 minutes away from where I was living (which I guess is an IOI) and I paid for the drinks (we both ended up going for chocolate milk rather than coffee). She wore jeans with some tears, a plain white top and a jeans jacket while I wore a buttoned-up blue shirt and gray elegant trousers. I could smell some perfume even though I was just recovering from the flu and my nose was somewhat stuffed.

We sat outside, facing each other. I only once or twice touched her hand when making a point. She told me she lives with roommates at 23 and I disclosed the fact I live with my parents at 25 but will move away "soon". She was impressed with my English and asked if I'm really native.
After an hour at the coffee place we walked to my home and I showed her some points of interest along the way. My dad was just leaving which was pretty awkward (told him to leave beforehand but it is what it is).

I put on Netflix as background noise and she found out her ex has used her Netflix account which led to a bit of drama with her contacting him on WhatsApp and then blocking him again. She started to tell me how he treated her "like a bank" and stuff. I tried to steer the conversation away and eventually took her phone and put it on the table in front of the sofa we were sitting at.

When trying to escalate, I held her back and spoke closer to her, but before even getting too close she said "She doesn't like kissing". It caught me off guard a bit and I later asked if she never kissed while in her relationships (which of course, she did). I guess it's just a weird way to say she's not ready for going forward. Anyhow, I didn't really know how to handle it (I joked "Should we go straight to bed then?" Which she laughed at).
I still did try to use more touch. Holding her hands, trying to feel her heartbeat (when we found out she doesn't have any for some reason and I teased her about it). A couple of times I got close to her face again and she repeated she doesn't like kissing. I playfully asked to just kiss me on the cheek while showing it to her and pointing at it but she didn't oblige. Everything's fine, of course. I told her I don't want to make her do anything she doesn't feel like. She mentioned she didn't even go for a hug until I did when we first met.

Another thing I should mention she showed me another ex of hers who kinda looked like a model, at least body-wise (she said he's a "gym rat"). Although it was sorta long-distance and he didn't keep faithful to her when he was back in Sri Lanka. I told her he was a great catch. I wonder if it's her qualifying herself by showing me.
I think I did a mistake and playfully asked what she thinks of this guy (pointing to myself) and she laughed and said she was still thinking about it and that I'm the first native guy she went out with.
At one point she said something to the point that guys from my country only want sex which led me to do a botched version of Aleks' "Good Sex" gambit and later "8 types of orgasm" gambit. Should've probably skip the latter since it wasn't really fitting and later I sensed she was less comfortable (Sitting upright rather than laying on the couch). I tried comforting her but was kinda nervous about the situation myself.

In the end, she just asked "Should I leave?" And I replied she could leave whenever she wanted. I offered her a drink again but she declined. She ordered another taxi and I told her it was nice meeting her. It really was apart from the awkward moments.

I do feel I was too much in a "chasing" frame (even though I pointed out the fact she took a taxi to see me). I complimented her and sat close to her instead of pulling her towards me (as I recently re-read on the "manhandle kiss"). On that note, I don't know how I should've reacted or acted when she said she "doesn't like kisses". I was conflicted with the articles of GC telling you to be persistent and disregard verbal objections and not wanting to pressure her and be a quasi-rapist.


After the meeting, we had this exchange:

Me: Did you arrive safely without getting kidnapped?
Her: Haha yeah. I'm home
Me: Glad to hear!
Her:
Me: Today was nice, would be glad to do it again sometime
Her: Let's try. Won't abe able to go out from next month very often. Because of tha job i have to work as a full time even on Saturday
Me: Wow so you're putting me on a time limit then huh [This was sarcastic but in hindsight didn't seem like it]
Me: Ok I'll see when I have time next week
Her: Nooo i told you i was really focusing on my job right now. I really excited with that that's why...[Wait Emoji]
Me: It's ok I understand )
Her: Thanks [Name]

I think I'll try to meet up for a picnic at a public park nearby my home again. Am unsure how to escalate smoothly, however.

The biggest sticking point is in those aspects. I'm very new to daygame and dating in general, lacking in confidence and experience and am still in the mindset of "I'm bothering her" / "She doesn't feel comfortable". Trying to escalate was a stressful experience. I thought about how "you should kiss within 10 minutes of getting together in home" but it is still so new to me and feels like a different person. And when I faced objections, I didn't know what to do. At one point I considered taking off her jacket but felt it too felt "rapey" to me.

Would be very appreciative of feedback

 

[Surveyor]

Just curious, what was her accent like? Because I met a girl from Sri Lanka in SC this semester. Svelte and into fashion design. And that girl’s accent is oddly hot, not at all like an Indian accent. Very British, but with a layer of something musical.


As far as feedback…work on calibration and catching subtext. Try to understand her frame and what she’s feeling.

@trashKENNUT What do you think about that?

 

[Will_V]

Recently I've been trying to start approaching girls (mostly daygame) when I was out and about. I'm inexperienced and rather introverted, but an experience from a couple of months ago led me to try and improve this area of my life.

Good stuff!

So I met this girl at my gym. Pretty short, with a pair of glasses and braces. I was doing hip thrusts as I saw her in front of me and decided I'd approach. The conversation went pretty smoothly and started by asking her if she was finished with the machine. She was very receptive and smiling. It goes well when I'm genuinely interested in the person (especially when it's a foreigner). When I figured she doesn't speak the local language we started to converse in English.

Well done.

Turns out she's from Sri Lanka. I asked her about the situation in there since I heard it was still pretty rough out there and she told me it's all right there now. She even starts to work at a travel agency soon and recommended I go there. I joked about her trying to get me killed which in hindsight may not be such a good approach since she has roots there.

Yeah your joke sounded a bit over the top to me. Unless you really have to increase attainability (which is not a problem that you seem to have) too much comedy doesn't bode well for creating sexual tension, which is the problem you do need to solve.

Turns out she lives here for over 6 years and lives in a different town (the gym is on the edge of the two, but they're only 15 minutes drive away). After about 5 minutes I ended the conversation by saying it's nice talking to her but I gotta finish my sets, and if I could have her Instagram. She told me she doesn't really use it much but can give me her # instead.

Yes, always good to be the first one to end it, on a positive note. Always best imo to get the # rather than insta, unless your profile is very good (I don't even have one).

I'm still quite new at this so am unsure if I should ask for a number first. I asked for her name and reached out with my hand but did kinda look at it (which I should remember to avoid)

After I finished the workout I messaged her-

The next evening, she messaged me-

Your texting is too gamey and almost comedic which isn't the best for creating sexual tension. Ultimately the biggest problem was lack of sexual tension throughout all your interactions, which flatlined the vibe when she came home.

If you're inexperienced and don't feel too comfortable getting sexual fast or getting girls complying to your requests, it's a good idea to at least try to hold the tension calmly and not allow yourself to feel compelled to defuse things with comedy. That way you train yourself to show your desires to others without shame.

She took a taxi to a coffeeshop 15 minutes away from where I was living (which I guess is an IOI) and I paid for the drinks (we both ended up going for chocolate milk rather than coffee). She wore jeans with some tears, a plain white top and a jeans jacket while I wore a buttoned-up blue shirt and gray elegant trousers. I could smell some perfume even though I was just recovering from the flu and my nose was somewhat stuffed.

We sat outside, facing each other. I only once or twice touched her hand when making a point. She told me she lives with roommates at 23 and I disclosed the fact I live with my parents at 25 but will move away "soon". She was impressed with my English and asked if I'm really native.
After an hour at the coffee place we walked to my home and I showed her some points of interest along the way. My dad was just leaving which was pretty awkward (told him to leave beforehand but it is what it is).

Well done on bringing her home, but the date is where you start escalating with touch, proximity, eye contact - i.e. sexual tension. Otherwise if you are just friendly, sometimes she'll follow you home but not with any anticipation, and then it could be harder to escalate because a) she's feeling more vulnerable alone with you and b) since you didn't show it before, why are you changing now?

It's never too early to start getting sexual.

I put on Netflix as background noise and she found out her ex has used her Netflix account which led to a bit of drama with her contacting him on WhatsApp and then blocking him again. She started to tell me how he treated her "like a bank" and stuff. I tried to steer the conversation away and eventually took her phone and put it on the table in front of the sofa we were sitting at.

Good job removing her phone, was she distracting herself with it? That's how you lead things, by taking the initiative.

When trying to escalate, I held her back and spoke closer to her, but before even getting too close she said "She doesn't like kissing". It caught me off guard a bit and I later asked if she never kissed while in her relationships (which of course, she did). I guess it's just a weird way to say she's not ready for going forward. Anyhow, I didn't really know how to handle it (I joked "Should we go straight to bed then?" Which she laughed at).

Again, as soon as tension grows it seems like you feel nervous and need to bust the bubble. This is no good, because it's the right balance of tension that compels her forward through the escalation. You have to learn to hold your nerves and maintain your intent without needing to go forward or backward.

She probably felt embarrassed about the braces, that's all. Maybe she really doesn't like kissing, since she seems a little inexperienced. Some girls also reserve kissing for boyfriendy relationships, for some reason, and don't like to do it when they just want to bang. In the end it doesn't matter.

In this case it can be good to say something like 'oh what do you like instead?' and get her to start talking and thinking about what turns her on. Even if she doesn't open up like this, you just have to try things - lean in and kiss her neck, play with her hair, caress her thighs, etc. You'll quickly find out what she responds to. I like to also give massages.

I still did try to use more touch. Holding her hands, trying to feel her heartbeat (when we found out she doesn't have any for some reason and I teased her about it). A couple of times I got close to her face again and she repeated she doesn't like kissing. I playfully asked to just kiss me on the cheek while showing it to her and pointing at it but she didn't oblige. Everything's fine, of course. I told her I don't want to make her do anything she doesn't feel like. She mentioned she didn't even go for a hug until I did when we first met.

Well done to keep trying here, but this stuff is nowhere near sexual enough. Kissing on cheeks is what girls do with their parents and whatnot.

At least try to get your hands somewhere around her tits or pussy, let her stop you if she's not comfortable. You have to trust her to show you when she doesn't like something. But she can't submit to you if you won't do anything.

Another thing I should mention she showed me another ex of hers who kinda looked like a model, at least body-wise (she said he's a "gym rat"). Although it was sorta long-distance and he didn't keep faithful to her when he was back in Sri Lanka. I told her he was a great catch. I wonder if it's her qualifying herself by showing me.
I think I did a mistake and playfully asked what she thinks of this guy (pointing to myself) and she laughed and said she was still thinking about it and that I'm the first native guy she went out with.

Nope, don't compare yourself with her exes. Her bringing them up is her way of trying to spur you into action. All you needed to do was 'mm hmm', change topics and keep escalating.

At one point she said something to the point that guys from my country only want sex which led me to do a botched version of Aleks' "Good Sex" gambit and later "8 types of orgasm" gambit. Should've probably skip the latter since it wasn't really fitting and later I sensed she was less comfortable (Sitting upright rather than laying on the couch). I tried comforting her but was kinda nervous about the situation myself.

That's what you should have talked about on the date. At this point it's probably not going to be congruent. Besides, she's there with you, ready, now's the time to get physical.

In the end, she just asked "Should I leave?" And I replied she could leave whenever she wanted. I offered her a drink again but she declined. She ordered another taxi and I told her it was nice meeting her. It really was apart from the awkward moments.

I do feel I was too much in a "chasing" frame (even though I pointed out the fact she took a taxi to see me). I complimented her and sat close to her instead of pulling her towards me (as I recently re-read on the "manhandle kiss"). On that note, I don't know how I should've reacted or acted when she said she "doesn't like kisses". I was conflicted with the articles of GC telling you to be persistent and disregard verbal objections and not wanting to pressure her and be a quasi-rapist.

As I mentioned before, there's loads of ways to escalate without kissing. But even if you do manhandle kiss you have to own it and not get up in your head. If she really doesn't like it, it'll be obvious in a couple of seconds and she'll respect you for going for it anyway. That's what girls respect, guys who go for what they want, and don't get ashamed about it.

After the meeting, we had this exchange:

Way too reactive, you should be leading her. You started off well showing consideration etc but then you need to proceed from the frame that she wants to see you, otherwise you end up showing your anxiety. At this point you probably just felt lost, but instead of reacting you have to come up with a plan and lead, lead, lead.

I think I'll try to meet up for a picnic at a public park nearby my home again. Am unsure how to escalate smoothly, however.

The biggest sticking point is in those aspects. I'm very new to daygame and dating in general, lacking in confidence and experience and am still in the mindset of "I'm bothering her" / "She doesn't feel comfortable". Trying to escalate was a stressful experience. I thought about how "you should kiss within 10 minutes of getting together in home" but it is still so new to me and feels like a different person. And when I faced objections, I didn't know what to do. At one point I considered taking off her jacket but felt it too felt "rapey" to me.

Definitely have some hangups there my friend. You have to trust that the girl will signal to you when she doesn't like something. But she expects and needs you to make a move first so she can either go ahead with it or put the brakes on. No moves, no fun times for either of you.

If you had a girlfriend and you took off her jacket so you could get intimate, it wouldn't be weird would it? So what's the difference? Must be that you are assuming she doesn't want sex. But she's there with you, netflixing and chilling, what else do you think she wants?

I think the big issue here is that you failed to sexualize early and often, which made it feel weird to suddenly go for it at the end, and the first sign of resistance completely boinked your momentum. If you are clear with yourself the whole time that you want to fuck her and you don't have any shame about it, and you don't hide it (while still being calibrated) then it becomes simply her choice to stop things at whatever point she chooses while you express your desires. That's how courtship works. So get used to not hiding it, not being comedic, just expressing yourself the way you want.

And don't be afraid to get a 'no', even multiple 'no's. The guy who can't stand to get a 'no' will never get any pussy. Girls often say 'no' 'no' 'no' and then suddenly 'yes'. As long as you remain chill, unembarrassed about your desires, it's up to her to leave if she can't give you what you want.

 

[Chad Tyrone]

Recently I've been trying to start approaching girls (mostly daygame) when I was out and about. I'm inexperienced and rather introverted, but an experience from a couple of months ago led me to try and improve this area of my life.

Great you are taking your time to figure the woman thing out. Not to worry, introversion is more of a set of personal choices one makes.Really don't think it's something people are born with lol. Not knocking you here, just pointing out that it shouldn't be an excuse for those lazy to learn game.

I gotta finish my sets, and if I could have her Instagram. She told me she doesn't really use it much but can give me her # instead.

I'm still quite new at this so am unsure if I should ask for a number first. I asked for her name and reached out with my hand but did kinda look at it (which I should remember to avoid)

After I finished the workout I messaged her-

You should be taking their numbers instead. Far better than chasing her over Insta to get her out. Besides, it kinda sets it in her mind that you are no longer strangers especially if u swapped nos and saved each other.

Yeah, you shouldn't be looking at your hands especially when touching chicks. With time, if you keep doing it, your touch becomes all-natural. You easily put your around the small of her back minutes in. Trust me. That said, you won't find yourself looking again.

Can't highlight the text part of the report, but some quick tips to help:

Your interactions sound that social. You veer off into MR.USEFUL guy from the go. Basically, you shouldn't be going around telling girls your skills, job or anything worthwhile that they may find worthy to use u as a tool for. Mean? Maybe. But way good for your interactions. How do u develop such a mindset? Glad u asked. You do it by becoming a lovable asshole. This is how u get success ...you don't get success by being a guy chicks can use if they want to...not before u lay her. You don't show scarcity even by doing this.

You also should be leading and make chicks come to you...making them invest in you. You muck it up by asking her whether you two could meet in a place that she likes. You trying to impress her there. Again, it's her investment in you, not you in hers. She doesn't take you seriously too which u also tell her.

Her initiating texts afterward doesn't mean any. Feels like she is asking you if u are going to the gym just like how she would a friend. Which it does seem from your report.She isn't chasing here. Check this out

https://www.girlschase.com/content/when-you-think-girls-are-chasing-you-you-re-still-chasing

We sat outside, facing each other. I only once or twice touched her hand when making a point. She told me she lives with roommates at 23 and I disclosed the fact I live with my parents at 25 but will move away "soon". She was impressed with my English and asked if I'm really native.
After an hour at the coffee place we walked to my home and I showed her some points of interest along the way. My dad was just leaving which was pretty awkward (told him to leave beforehand but it is what it is).

I put on Netflix as background noise and she found out her ex has used her Netflix account which led to a bit of drama with her contacting him on WhatsApp and then blocking him again. She started to tell me how he treated her "like a bank" and stuff. I tried to steer the conversation away and eventually took her phone and put it on the table in front of the sofa we were sitting at.

When trying to escalate, I held her back and spoke closer to her, but before even getting too close she said "She doesn't like kissing". It caught me off guard a bit and I later asked if she never kissed while in her relationships (which of course, she did). I guess it's just a weird way to say she's not ready for going forward. Anyhow, I didn't really know how to handle it (I joked "Should we go straight to bed then?" Which she laughed at).
I still did try to use more touch. Holding her hands, trying to feel her heartbeat (when we found out she doesn't have any for some reason and I teased her about it). A couple of times I got close to her face again and she repeated she doesn't like kissing. I playfully asked to just kiss me on the cheek while showing it to her and pointing at it but she didn't oblige. Everything's fine, of course. I told her I don't want to make her do anything she doesn't feel like. She mentioned she didn't even go for a hug until I did when we first met.

At no point,do you sexualize or set frames but I understand u still new at this. You seem to be "cognizant' of gambits but u should be introducing frames from the outset.It's how you frame and make her aware of what is to come...it's what your interaction will be operating from.Yet too you should work on your vibe. Make it sexual to appear congruent. Don't think u got yourself sexually prized just because you used the gambit.How you come across is important too from your fundamentals to your body language.It also does count to make her horny for you while also making her feel allowed to do so. You caused a cognitive dissonance in her here .That's why you encountered resistance.

Another thing I should mention she showed me another ex of hers who kinda looked like a model, at least body-wise (she said he's a "gym rat"). Although it was sorta long-distance and he didn't keep faithful to her when he was back in Sri Lanka. I told her he was a great catch. I wonder if it's her qualifying herself by showing me.
I think I did a mistake and playfully asked what she thinks of this guy (pointing to myself) and she laughed and said she was still thinking about it and that I'm the first native guy she went out with.
At one point she said something to the point that guys from my country only want sex which led me to do a botched version of Aleks' "Good Sex" gambit and later "8 types of orgasm" gambit. Should've probably skip the latter since it wasn't really fitting and later I sensed she was less comfortable (Sitting upright rather than laying on the couch). I tried comforting her but was kinda nervous about the situation myself.

yeah guessed it...she sees you more as a friend. I don't think chicks bring up their ex pics around sexy lovers or some "I have a boyfriend" kind of stuff. They may but the lovers just brush it off. You bring him up here. Not to say you should trash. But you kinda sub-communicate he was far better than you. You ought to be assuming attraction with chicks not asking them if they approve of you. But sadly it seems beginners tend toward this


Approval seeking

. On that note, I don't know how I should've reacted or acted when she said she "doesn't like kisses". I was conflicted with the articles of GC telling you to be persistent and disregard verbal objections and not wanting to pressure her and be a quasi-rapist.

you could if u would have set sexual frames from the go.It then would have been some token resistance rather than a heavy one.

I think I'll try to meet up for a picnic at a public park nearby my home again. Am unsure how to escalate smoothly, however.

The biggest sticking point is in those aspects. I'm very new to daygame and dating in general, lacking in confidence and experience and am still in the mindset of "I'm bothering her" / "She doesn't feel comfortable". Trying to escalate was a stressful experience. I thought about how "you should kiss within 10 minutes of getting together in home" but it is still so new to me and feels like a different person. And when I faced objections, I didn't know what to do. At one point I considered taking off her jacket but felt it too felt "rapey" to me.

Would be very appreciative of feedback

it's pretty much dead from here. If she would be seeing you again from here, maybe as a best friend now. It would be way hard to bring her to an isolated place again. Up to you to cut it with her from here or keep seeing her if she's worthy a friend. You also seem hesitant when u feel it "rapey" to take her jacket off. Meet more chicks and the reluctance goes away.

My apologies if at any point I seemed harsh.

Best,
Chad Tyrone.

 

[rabbit]

Just curious, what was her accent like? Because I met a girl from Sri Lanka in SC this semester. Svelte and into fashion design. And that girl’s accent is oddly hot, not at all like an Indian accent. Very British, but with a layer of something musical.

Yeah her accent was rather interesting. It has that Indian vibe but not quite. I liked it.

Always best imo to get the # rather than insta, unless your profile is very good (I don't even have one).

Noted. Thanks

If you're inexperienced and don't feel too comfortable getting sexual fast or getting girls complying to your requests, it's a good idea to at least try to hold the tension calmly and not allow yourself to feel compelled to defuse things with comedy. That way you train yourself to show your desires to others without shame.

You got it 100% and it's clear it's still my biggest hurdle to overcome. I might try to create a whole post about it but anxiety (and social anxiety, too) is a big part of my psyche and I try to defuse it with humor. I can get this feeling that nothing is worse than "awkward silence"

In this case it can be good to say something like 'oh what do you like instead?' and get her to start talking and thinking about what turns her on. Even if she doesn't open up like this, you just have to try things - lean in and kiss her neck, play with her hair, caress her thighs, etc. You'll quickly find out what she responds to. I like to also give massages.

Nice suggestions!

I think the big issue here is that you failed to sexualize early and often, which made it feel weird to suddenly go for it at the end, and the first sign of resistance completely boinked your momentum. If you are clear with yourself the whole time that you want to fuck her and you don't have any shame about it, and you don't hide it (while still being calibrated) then it becomes simply her choice to stop things at whatever point she chooses while you express your desires. That's how courtship works. So get used to not hiding it, not being comedic, just expressing yourself the way you want.

Yeah, again this is my biggest mindset change. To understand I can be sexual and not apologize for it. But I'm not sure where to start. "Expressing myself the way I want" most of the time wouldn't be sexual since I'm not confident in my ability and appearance.

Your interactions sound that social. You veer off into MR.USEFUL guy from the go. Basically, you shouldn't be going around telling girls your skills, job or anything worthwhile that they may find worthy to use u as a tool for

Not sure where I did it? I didn't even tell her my job throughout all this time. If you're speaking about the language exchange I did it because I remembered it's useful to suggest doing an activity while getting a girls # rather than just asking for it. I guess you mean it's better to suggest we just get coffee instead of meeting up to exchange languages as a "plausiable deniability" and that it should be reserved for a reason to get her home with you?

She doesn't take you seriously too which u also tell her.

Do you mean when I told her to tell her mom "It's nothing serious"? Or in other ways in the interaction.

At no point,do you sexualize or set frames but I understand u still new at this. You seem to be "cognizant' of gambits but u should be introducing frames from the outset.It's how you frame and make her aware of what is to come...it's what your interaction will be operating from.Yet too you should work on your vibe.

Yep. My "game vibe" is a front to my "scared rabbit" self.

My apologies if at any point I seemed harsh.

It is definetly what I am looking for. I don't want someone to tell me "Yeah man you did great!" when it obviously isn't the case.