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Is forcing them the only way?

TrailBlazer

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Aug 15, 2025
Messages
160
So I just had another date where the atmosphere wasn’t even remotely sexual.

It’s starting to get annoying because this December it will be my 6th year of daygame, I have around 3000 approaches, and from that I got 10 dates so far. So every date matters a lot to me and I can’t waste them like this.

I approached this girl a week ago and the convo was pretty short. She didn’t want to give me her ig but after a bit more talking she did.

During texting she was responsive, asked questions, etc. so I told her to meet me.

But from the start she had a friendly vibe. We talked and it was fun, I changed locations a lot, I used pretty much every technique in the book again, three gambits… but nothing seemed to work

But she followed me everywhere, I wonder if there was a way to make something happen. Of course there was. But I don’t know what I did wrong, again. So I can’t possibly learn from this.

I could have forcefully stopped her and told her to hug me. Or to kiss me. Because I did all the other, smaller touches - held her hand, caressed her, hugged her as a sorry for teasing her..

And still it didn’t lead to anything. As if there was an invisible wall. I couldn’t even imagine anything happening, that’s how unsexual the vibe was.

Any recommendations on what to do? Maybe I need to just take the girl and do it? That would feel so forced! Almost like assault.

But I see tons of guys with girlfriends, even guys who don’t know this site, it can’t be that difficult. But I need something after 6 years guys.
 

AJAK

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Sep 14, 2025
Messages
21
So I just had another date where the atmosphere wasn’t even remotely sexual.

It’s starting to get annoying because this December it will be my 6th year of daygame, I have around 3000 approaches, and from that I got 10 dates so far. So every date matters a lot to me and I can’t waste them like this.

I approached this girl a week ago and the convo was pretty short. She didn’t want to give me her ig but after a bit more talking she did.

During texting she was responsive, asked questions, etc. so I told her to meet me.

But from the start she had a friendly vibe. We talked and it was fun, I changed locations a lot, I used pretty much every technique in the book again, three gambits… but nothing seemed to work

But she followed me everywhere, I wonder if there was a way to make something happen. Of course there was. But I don’t know what I did wrong, again. So I can’t possibly learn from this.

I could have forcefully stopped her and told her to hug me. Or to kiss me. Because I did all the other, smaller touches - held her hand, caressed her, hugged her as a sorry for teasing her..

And still it didn’t lead to anything. As if there was an invisible wall. I couldn’t even imagine anything happening, that’s how unsexual the vibe was.

Any recommendations on what to do? Maybe I need to just take the girl and do it? That would feel so forced! Almost like assault.

But I see tons of guys with girlfriends, even guys who don’t know this site, it can’t be that difficult. But I need something after 6 years guys.

If you wanted to kiss her, what I would have done is tell her that her lips look amazing and say "I bet they taste like heaven." and look deep into her eyes seductively while doing this. This will build sexual tension and there should be some sexual tension prior to this. Then build a compliance yes ladder.

I haven't been able to test this myself yet because i'm having dating struggles of my own.
 
Last edited:

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
2,329
So I just had another date where the atmosphere wasn’t even remotely sexual.

It’s starting to get annoying because this December it will be my 6th year of daygame, I have around 3000 approaches, and from that I got 10 dates so far. So every date matters a lot to me and I can’t waste them like this.

I approached this girl a week ago and the convo was pretty short. She didn’t want to give me her ig but after a bit more talking she did.

During texting she was responsive, asked questions, etc. so I told her to meet me.

But from the start she had a friendly vibe. We talked and it was fun, I changed locations a lot, I used pretty much every technique in the book again, three gambits… but nothing seemed to work

But she followed me everywhere, I wonder if there was a way to make something happen. Of course there was. But I don’t know what I did wrong, again. So I can’t possibly learn from this.

I could have forcefully stopped her and told her to hug me. Or to kiss me. Because I did all the other, smaller touches - held her hand, caressed her, hugged her as a sorry for teasing her..

And still it didn’t lead to anything. As if there was an invisible wall. I couldn’t even imagine anything happening, that’s how unsexual the vibe was.

Any recommendations on what to do? Maybe I need to just take the girl and do it? That would feel so forced! Almost like assault.

But I see tons of guys with girlfriends, even guys who don’t know this site, it can’t be that difficult. But I need something after 6 years guys.

What happened when you brought up sexual topics?

Dropping gambits is not the whole picture. You have to find out what she wants to talk about, what excites her, let her show you what her obstacles are so that you can deal with them.

You can tell a lot about how a girl is going to respond to escalation by simply bringing up the topic of sex and seeing what her frame is. Is she asexual? Is she inexperienced? Does she have bad experiences or inhibitions? Let her tell you all about it, so you can show her a path toward what she really wants.

If she was compliant with you, it's worth inviting her home. Maybe she will happily agree, and if not, she'll probably say something that reveals what the problem is.
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
6,342
And still it didn’t lead to anything. As if there was an invisible wall. I couldn’t even imagine anything happening, that’s how unsexual the vibe was.

Any recommendations on what to do? Maybe I need to just take the girl and do it? That would feel so forced! Almost like assault.

But I see tons of guys with girlfriends, even guys who don’t know this site, it can’t be that difficult. But I need something after 6 years guys.

I knew guys like this in the forum, i would advice you to focus more on subtext of the interaction get more on man to women, sexual vibe.... Read 60 years of challenge...that is a basic one...


 

Warped Mindless

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
526
It’s starting to get annoying because this December it will be my 6th year of daygame, I have around 3000 approaches, and from that I got 10 dates so far. So every date matters a lot to me and I can’t waste them like this.
Forget the date; that’s not your problem.

The problem is the part I quoted.

3000 approaches.
6 years.
10 dates.

That’s like 0.33% “success” rate.

You are doing something horribly wrong. Do you have a journal?
 

TrailBlazer

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Aug 15, 2025
Messages
160
If you wanted to kiss her, what I would have done is tell her that her lips look amazing and say "I bet they taste like heaven." and look deep into her eyes seductively while doing this. This will build sexual tension and there should be some sexual tension prior to this. Then build a compliance yes ladder.

I haven't been able to test this myself yet because i'm having dating struggles of my own.

I feel like that gives all of my power away, like after saying that they’d know I like them, and all the teasing (borderline insulting) attraction-building stuff I did before would be rendered useless.

But I guess I have to do at least something, I’ll try it when I get the chance.

What happened when you brought up sexual topics?

Dropping gambits is not the whole picture. You have to find out what she wants to talk about, what excites her, let her show you what her obstacles are so that you can deal with them.

You can tell a lot about how a girl is going to respond to escalation by simply bringing up the topic of sex and seeing what her frame is. Is she asexual? Is she inexperienced? Does she have bad experiences or inhibitions? Let her tell you all about it, so you can show her a path toward what she really wants.

If she was compliant with you, it's worth inviting her home. Maybe she will happily agree, and if not, she'll probably say something that reveals what the problem is.

I started with romantic and spicy books, she went to more innocent topics immediately. Then I tried again and forced the gambits there, but she still acted very innocent.

I could have talked about it more as you say, but it’s not like we’re some authority that can give women great times, are we. I’d need to be way more in control and chill for that.

Also I didn’t feel good being in the role of the “hunter” and escalating - something to work on too.

About inviting her home, I was in a different city and didn’t want to risk spending money for a place if she wouldn’t be down. So I waited if she will be down and in the end she wasn’t, so I didn’t book anything.

Maybe if I had the appt I would have pushed more, but then also I’d risk losing $50 for nothing.
 

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
2,329
I started with romantic and spicy books, she went to more innocent topics immediately. Then I tried again and forced the gambits there, but she still acted very innocent.

In that case you can call her out in a teasing way (after bringing up sex already), e.g.

"So tell me a story of your own."
"So what's your favorite position?" (playfully - get ready to act all innocent when she pushes back).
"What's the most adventurous thing you've done to get a guy you really want?"

When a girl is acting all coy around the topic of sex, you want to put a little pressure on and get her talking and volunteering something, rather than just carrying on with your own gambits and stories. She has to feel like she has to keep up with you or risk falling below your level.

I could have talked about it more as you say, but it’s not like we’re some authority that can give women great times, are we. I’d need to be way more in control and chill for that.

Nah it's not about being some uber giga sex chad. It's just about being comfortable with your own sexuality and sexual experiences, and making her feel the same.

Also I didn’t feel good being in the role of the “hunter” and escalating - something to work on too.

Yes. It's always worth taking the next step and seeing if it's solid or not, even when she seems like she's not quite matching you. Some girls just don't know what to do or how to handle their end of things, and all they need is a guy who keeps going and doesn't freak out.

About inviting her home, I was in a different city and didn’t want to risk spending money for a place if she wouldn’t be down. So I waited if she will be down and in the end she wasn’t, so I didn’t book anything.

Maybe if I had the appt I would have pushed more, but then also I’d risk losing $50 for nothing.

Yeah, unless I was going to spend all night gaming I'd not book anything. But you can still just go ahead and when it's time to pull, suggest her place instead.
 
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