Last minute resistance after bar night, very close to pulling.

[Beerlover]

Hello elders,

So this happened to me twice within a couple of weeks: In the latest stages of a night out I spot a pair of girl sitting alone, one them being more approachable. I sit down and chat them up and escalate it with the better target. They warm up well, sitting right into me and are open to kissing. We are having fun all around. I don't neglect their friend and keep a conversation with them too but they seem a bit reserved the whole time. Now when the bar starts to close I bring up going home with me for the target girl.

This is when the "I would like to but I'm not sure if I should/ I don't want to go home alone but I have a boyfriend" kind of lines starts. Despite my best efforts I cannot overcome this and they end up taking a cab home with their friend.

Any tips how to get around this? I'm certain it's been really close both times but something is missing.

Thank you for any insights.

Regards: aspiring PUA artist

 

[OldGuy]

You need to isolate your target earlier. Or invite them both home and try for a threesome.

 

[Beerlover]

You need to isolate your target earlier. Or invite them both home and try for a threesome.

That would have been tricky since the friend was a bit reserved/protective and wouldn't have responded well to isolation or invitations.

Edit: Also there was a time constraint on the last case since I met the girls like 30 min before the bar/nightclub closed.

 

[mirror]

Hello elders,

So this happened to me twice within a couple of weeks: In the latest stages of a night out I spot a pair of girl sitting alone, one them being more approachable. I sit down and chat them up and escalate it with the better target. They warm up well, sitting right into me and are open to kissing. We are having fun all around. I don't neglect their friend and keep a conversation with them too but they seem a bit reserved the whole time. Now when the bar starts to close I bring up going home with me for the target girl.

This is when the "I would like to but I'm not sure if I should/ I don't want to go home alone but I have a boyfriend" kind of lines starts. Despite my best efforts I cannot overcome this and they end up taking a cab home with their friend.

Any tips how to get around this? I'm certain it's been really close both times but something is missing.

Thank you for any insights.

Regards: aspiring PUA

You want to ask her whether she is in for some more excitement, or some hook you have to create earlier related to your home . Create a hook into going to your home at the start of the conversation (e.g. you look amazing, i just imagined a girl like you sitting on my desk in the morning light) (yeah cheesy i know) and then later on when during or after kissing, you can ask her whether she wants to try the morning light on the desk in your appartment.

It's not so much about what the thing you refer to is, as much as it is about the coherence of your character/desires/she may feel her choices are allowed/in line with what she wants

 

[Beerlover]

You want to ask her whether she is in for some more excitement, or some hook you have to create earlier related to your home . Create a hook into going to your home at the start of the conversation (e.g. you look amazing, i just imagined a girl like you sitting on my desk in the morning light) (yeah cheesy i know) and then later on when during or after kissing, you can ask her whether she wants to try the morning light on the desk in your appartment.

It's not so much about what the thing you refer to is, as much as it is about the coherence of your character/desires/she may feel her choices are allowed/in line with what she wants

Thank you for the tip, this sounds helpful. The idea of going home is planted early on but not forced at that point. I like the morning light joke, since it's only a subtle sex reference and might subconsciously lower their anti slut defenses.

The friend is still a bit of a problem, even though they are not hostile and in "polite" terms with me. I think in this situation they don't want the girl to cheat on their boyfriend. Or the target girl doesn't want their friend seeing them doing something so terrible.

T: Beerlover

 

[Will_V]

but they seem a bit reserved the whole time.

In what way? Did you try to find out why?

Now when the bar starts to close I bring up going home with me for the target girl.

Well, if they're reserved and you try to pull, it's probably not gonna work.

This is when the "I would like to but I'm not sure if I should/ I don't want to go home alone but I have a boyfriend" kind of lines starts.

That's a bit strange .. makes it sound like you are not really getting sexual or escalating with these girls if they're going to bring up the boyfriend at that stage.

What are you doing exactly to warm these girls before the pull?

This article seems like it'd help you out:

To Pull Girls You Must Be Better Than the Average Man

Achieving consistent one-night stands requires game a cut above the ordinary. What do seduction skills like this look like, exactly? I spoke with a student living in a tough area with a high male-to-female sex ratio. He has little problem picking up girls for one-night stands when he travels...

www.girlschase.com

 

[Beerlover]

In what way? Did you try to find out why?

Talking about the friend here, I think she was pretty sober and the vibe was she was taking her friend (my target) out. The target was the shyer one of the girls.

Well, if they're reserved and you try to pull, it's probably not gonna work.

The target got warmer and warmer as we talked open to touching even small kisses. They weren't reserved more like shy. Probably not warmed up enough though.

That's a bit strange .. makes it sound like you are not really getting sexual or escalating with these girls if they're going to bring up the boyfriend at that stage.

What are you doing exactly to warm these girls before the pull?

It might be I didn't manage to escalate enough. Here is a rough breakdown of the events I wrote in a PM:

Sit close to the target girl from the start but not too close to scare them off. From there on I lead the conversation actively for the first a couple of minutes, "having a fun night?, why are pretty girls like you sitting alone?, are you celebrating something?, etc. never let the conversation slow down so it would feel boring. I'm being interested in what they say and just try to keep the vibe upbeat. Then pretty soon touch the target on the shoulder or put my hand around them for a short while and from there on escalate gradually by more touching and with comments like I like your hair etc. Read their reactions. I found making up stories about myself is pretty fun, and if they don't buy them just sell them as joke. Do not neglect the target's friend and try to stay in the friend's good graces so she would be okay with me going home with her friend.

Basically this in a sexually upwards trajectory.

This article seems like it'd help you out:

Thanks! This was a spot on. A lot of good stuff here.

Deep diving, Screening, Qualification, Chase framing. None of these things even came to my mind.

From the article: Give her a much deeper connection than most guys she has access to.

This is also something to work on. Any tips/lines for developing (I assume this is referring to emotional) connection in the short time frame of maybe 30 mins or so?

 

[Will_V]

Deep diving, Screening, Qualification, Chase framing. None of these things even came to my mind.

Yeah, if you're not doing any of this then unless she's already set her mind on a ONS and you stand out as the guy for her, she's probably going to feel unready - she doesn't know you well enough or feel that you really like her for her.

From the article: Give her a much deeper connection than most guys she has access to.

Yes.

This is also something to work on. Any tips/lines for developing (I assume this is referring to emotional) connection in the short time frame of maybe 30 mins or so?

I don't think there's really a difference, you follow the same steps. Coming on stronger, being more sexual and more overt can get you closer to a yes faster, but it can also go the other way.

How fast she is willing to make the choice to come home with you also depends a lot on her state of mind.

I'd suggest that you read the articles on deep diving and connection building and create a map of how you'll approach the next one, and iterate from there.

 

[Brassfaced_Jim]

This is the point where you pull out the bag of c*ca-cola bro ;P

you need to dangle some kind of high value back at your crib somehow….or ply her with more alcohol.

a bottle of fine wine at urs may do the trick.
Or a cute cat that ‘does backflips’

etc etc etc