My nonverbals are more like james bond , not jovial energetic funny guy

[alexhunter8]

Hi mates , my default nonverbals/ persona is more like james bond / authoritative serious officer. Because of my: deep voice and slow speech , less fluctuations in tonality( almost monotonous), more downtalk and authoritative. Plus my slow movements , minimal head movements, subtle smile. Good prolonged eye contact.
I never laugh or fully smile unless there's some joke . Added on top of all, my broad physique and upright posture . ( you can imagine me , this is my default persona style)

My persona / nonverbals is opposite to that of jovial energetic funny guy.
I am better at verbals and have some idea what to say .
But I am clueless whether how I say my lines and the subtone nonverbals is affecting my results, despite of saying the right words.
I think you guys can get a clear view of my nonverbals tonality only when you see me in real interacting with a girl. Is it possible for any experienced gamer to talk on call demo and assess how my tonality and vibe is?
Or is it absolutely essential for the gamer to be in real close to me while gaming , only then he can get a clear picture?

Now these are my points : ( specifically with cold approach)
1. As long as I say the right lines or don't fuck up verbals , how much does " how I say it , tonality and non-verbals ( undertone ) matter ?
2. As I described my persona and demeanour above ( deep voice, slow speech, subtle smile sometimes , broad physique upright posture kind of like james bond / authoritative professor , not being very funny not being very energetic) (kindly read above in my post) , is this ideal or just average fine or bad ?

3. Seems like I should take acting classes . I dont have control over my face expressions , even I find it that I have to force a smile most of the times . Due to the fact that i have to think , observe her , read her and focus on what I say etc etc.( naturally laugh or smile comes to me when there is a joke or very funny thing ). Otherwise most of the times I just force a smile or consciously smile while cold approach . So at the end I have only 2 : either neutral or subtle smile face expression.
Does taking acting classes drastically improve my results?
4. Also regarding my tonality and how I say my verbals the undertone , modulations etc , should I take more acting, mimicry classes ?

 

[Kshatrap A.V.]

Use vocaroo app to send your voice here.

And I did tell you that your tonality is not like James Bond. You got to see the truth.

 

[James D]

I can't count the number of guys I've seen who mistakenly think they have the James Bond vibe when in fact they're just stiff, monotonous and overly serious.

And they almost always have a sort of robotic tryhard alpha walk.

James Bond is none of these things.

Even Daniel Craig, the most "serious" of Bonds is wildly charming, has charismatic facial expressions, speaks in a deep but not monotonous voice.

Not to bash on you but if you really were rocking the Bond nonverbals, you'd be magnetizing girls everywhere you go.

A more reserved/serious guy is not Bond. He's just invisible.

 

[Will_V]

@alexhunter8 you're asking questions that have no specific answer, based on a context we cannot see, and which you describe in ways that are unclear at best.

1. As long as I say the right lines or don't fuck up verbals , how much does " how I say it , tonality and non-verbals ( undertone ) matter ?

How long is a piece of string?

Also, what does it mean to 'say the right lines' and not 'fuck up verbals'?

2. As I described my persona and demeanour above ( deep voice, slow speech, subtle smile sometimes , broad physique upright posture kind of like james bond / authoritative professor , not being very funny not being very energetic) (kindly read above in my post) , is this ideal or just average fine or bad ?

First of all, which James Bond? There are lots of them with completely different personalities. The only thing they have in common is a suit and a british accent.

Besides that, the character of James Bond has always been much more than someone with a serious and authoritative affectation. There are lots of people out there looking all serious and authoritative with the personality of wallpaper, I'll bet you never thought of your local parking enforcement officer as James Bond.

What else do you think James Bond has that makes him interesting to people, especially women?

3. Seems like I should take acting classes . I dont have control over my face expressions , even I find it that I have to force a smile most of the times . Due to the fact that i have to think , observe her , read her and focus on what I say etc etc.( naturally laugh or smile comes to me when there is a joke or very funny thing ). Otherwise most of the times I just force a smile or consciously smile while cold approach . So at the end I have only 2 : either neutral or subtle smile face expression.
Does taking acting classes drastically improve my results?

I've never done acting classes, but I'd imagine that no, that's not what you need (though why not try it and see?).

Based on what I've read in your threads, you sound like someone who needs to learn how to release their self-expression, relax and have fun, and enjoy the moment, not bury your expressions under a layer of acting.

You've described before how people feel hesitant/intimidated/afraid around you, what do you think you can do to change that, besides putting on the actor's mask?

You say you have to force a smile - but why does your face not communicate enjoyment already, if you enjoy what you are doing in the world? Where there is relaxed enjoyment, there is no need for a smile to soften anything.

Instead of trying to paint a visage that women might find appealing, why not think about the experience of being intimate with her - the way you'd speak to her, touch her, the way you'd feel being close to her and the way you'd express yourself to her in ways that she'd find fulfilling and pleasurable - and work back from there? And if you are not in a headspace where you'd feel comfortable expressing yourself intimately with a woman, why not?

Because eventually the mask has to come off, nobody can wear one all the time. And it's the way you really experience yourself that will eventually come through, for better or worse.

 

[Kshatrap A.V.]

@alexhunter8 let me give my observations that I made after talking to you over call on two occasions. If that's fine with you. Of you want it removed. Lmk.

I seriously don't understand how can people around you get intimidated or afraid cuz of you cuz I totally didn't feel like it. Maybe cuz it's on the call but still I didn't feel a dangerous vibe.

You give serious vibes along with someone who really wants to get laid. And no i am not attacking you but only real observations.

You THINK that you are doing things right but that's not how I felt and i even told you how in certain ways you can improve.

You also need to stop misinterpretating things about yourself.

Maybe it's your behaviour that's really turning people away. Like how my wing told me that you were being so clingy about talking to him despite him telling you that he was stuck in project.

If you really want to improve then you need to be chill regardless you get results or not. Maybe your desperation is showing off in certain ways to the women. It doesn't really matter if you are XYZ age and not laid. It will only turn women off.

@Will_V i was the one who suggested him about acting but the gist was that he should practice his facial expressions in front of the mirror daily cuz that's what I did years ago.

The thing is man I told you that there is no shortcut. If you want to improve non verbals and verbals... It will take practice.

And look for ways how you really come across to people. Not just in your fantasy. Are people afraid cuz you are so dominant alpha military walker or is it cuz of other things like maybe ( my assumptions after analysing you) clinginess, thinking of yourself as best and other as worst, having an agenda etc. etc.

I could sense that you kind of give off this vibe.

And if you were thinking that I am jovial energetic dude cuz of the demo.approach I showed you then the answer is no. I am actually quite serious but I know how to be fun.

 

[Will_V]

@Will_V i was the one who suggested him about acting but the gist was that he should practice his facial expressions in front of the mirror daily cuz that's what I did years ago.

Yeah, I can see how acting techniques could help you to express yourself, to reverse bad habits of body language, etc.

My view though is that what fundamentally draws people to you is when you are capable of and comfortable expressing your core personality - which is specific to each person. Adopting styles and mannerisms on top of that, that are congruent with your personality, to accentuate it and give it flair, is great. But the foundation of self expression is not created through artifice. Even the greatest actors have shone by far the most in roles that fit their natural dispositions.

I've been reading the memoirs of Casanova lately, and something that struck me is the way he described the thing that made people like him and help him throughout his life (and there were many instances where he gained favor with people he really didn't have much to offer). And it was basically nothing more than to tell the truth about himself in a straightforward way.

That's been my experience, seduction for me has always represented a more truthful way of interacting with women than the typical way that a man relates to her - which is full of politeness, inhibition, covering up of desire, etc. I've always believed that what makes women like me is that I honestly like them, that my expressions of desire toward them are not contrived, and that I find them immensely enjoyable in all sorts of ways, not just in the moment of sex. I can't even imagine how I would go about seduction if that wasn't the foundation and rationale for what I was doing. I can typically point to a moment in every seduction I've had where I felt like she realized that.

The techniques of seduction - which are many and useful - help me to navigate from a meeting to the bedroom, but they do not replace the honest, uninhibited self expression that provides a spontaneous 'raison d'être' for what we are doing.

And look for ways how you really come across to people. Not just in your fantasy. Are people afraid cuz you are so dominant alpha military walker or is it cuz of other things like maybe ( my assumptions after analysing you) clinginess, thinking of yourself as best and other as worst, having an agenda etc. etc.

This sounds spot on to me.

 

[alexhunter8]

I can't count the number of guys I've seen who mistakenly think they have the James Bond vibe when in fact they're just stiff, monotonous and overly serious.

And they almost always have a sort of robotic tryhard alpha walk.

James Bond is none of these things.

Even Daniel Craig, the most "serious" of Bonds is wildly charming, has charismatic facial expressions, speaks in a deep but not monotonous voice.

Not to bash on you but if you really were rocking the Bond nonverbals, you'd be magnetizing girls everywhere you go.

A more reserved/serious guy is not Bond. He's just invisible.

I think I'm magnetising some times depends upon my mood , energy, state , recent small success etc.
I have got iois .
And regarding your robotic walk , I'm sure I'm not forcing any tough or stiffness. It is my natural walk due to muscle tone and neural .
I am not saying I'm extremely serious and monotonous all the time .
If you can read above it's that I lean more towards that serious authoritative grounded type Most of the times naturally.
So what should I do now to imporve ?

Also can you elaborate on " If I'm rocking the james bond nonverbals , i would be magnetising girls everywhere " what will be the exact responses from girls from cold approach and social circle and do you think I might have missed those signals ? ( I think even if I had 70% of Bonds serious and grounded vibe , the stranger girls can't notice much from distance in a crowd , on top they their mind is already occupied and so they won't be approaching me or falling on my lap. But I want to bring your notice that , 2 times in cafe 2 hot girls made prolonged eye contact with me and I caught them accidental. One girl literally turned 3 times to look at me and I caught her , she turned back immediately

 

[Kshatrap A.V.]

Yeah, I can see how acting techniques could help you to express yourself, to reverse bad habits of body language, etc.

My view though is that what fundamentally draws people to you is when you are capable of and comfortable expressing your core personality - which is specific to each person. Adopting styles and mannerisms on top of that, that are congruent with your personality, to accentuate it and give it flair, is great. But the foundation of self expression is not created through artifice. Even the greatest actors have shone by far the most in roles that fit their natural dispositions.

I've been reading the memoirs of Casanova lately, and something that struck me is the way he described the thing that made people like him and help him throughout his life (and there were many instances where he gained favor with people he really didn't have much to offer). And it was basically nothing more than to tell the truth about himself in a straightforward way.

That's been my experience, seduction for me has always represented a more truthful way of interacting with women than the typical way that a man relates to her - which is full of politeness, inhibition, covering up of desire, etc. I've always believed that what makes women like me is that I honestly like them, that my expressions of desire toward them are not contrived, and that I find them immensely enjoyable in all sorts of ways, not just in the moment of sex. I can't even imagine how I would go about seduction if that wasn't the foundation and rationale for what I was doing. I can typically point to a moment in every seduction I've had where I felt like she realized that.

The techniques of seduction - which are many and useful - help me to navigate from a meeting to the bedroom, but they do not replace the honest, uninhibited self expression that provides a spontaneous 'raison d'être' for what we are doing.

I get you point and it really took me years to get rid of inner inhibition regarding my love for women... Which I believe you didn't have.

So, I do understand that beneath all the outer stuff.. love and lust for women has to be there.


But it definitely takes time to reach that place when you have been raised to inhibit around women and see them in negative light.

 

[alexhunter8]

@alexhunter8 you're asking questions that have no specific answer, based on a context we cannot see, and which you describe in ways that are unclear at best.



How long is a piece of string?

Also, what does it mean to 'say the right lines' and not 'fuck up verbals'?



First of all, which James Bond? There are lots of them with completely different personalities. The only thing they have in common is a suit and a british accent.

Besides that, the character of James Bond has always been much more than someone with a serious and authoritative affectation. There are lots of people out there looking all serious and authoritative with the personality of wallpaper, I'll bet you never thought of your local parking enforcement officer as James Bond.

What else do you think James Bond has that makes him interesting to people, especially women?



I've never done acting classes, but I'd imagine that no, that's not what you need (though why not try it and see?).

Based on what I've read in your threads, you sound like someone who needs to learn how to release their self-expression, relax and have fun, and enjoy the moment, not bury your expressions under a layer of acting.

You've described before how people feel hesitant/intimidated/afraid around you, what do you think you can do to change that, besides putting on the actor's mask?

You say you have to force a smile - but why does your face not communicate enjoyment already, if you enjoy what you are doing in the world? Where there is relaxed enjoyment, there is no need for a smile to soften anything.

Instead of trying to paint a visage that women might find appealing, why not think about the experience of being intimate with her - the way you'd speak to her, touch her, the way you'd feel being close to her and the way you'd express yourself to her in ways that she'd find fulfilling and pleasurable - and work back from there? And if you are not in a headspace where you'd feel comfortable expressing yourself intimately with a woman, why not?

Because eventually the mask has to come off, nobody can wear one all the time. And it's the way you really experience yourself that will eventually come through, for better or worse.

Regarding your reply to my 1st question , I mean is tonality undertone including nonverbals ( how you say it ) matters significantly or slightly or somewhat matters like 50/ 50 ? As long as I say the right words and lines ( verbals ) While interacting with a cold approach girl.
By not messing up verbals , I mean my words lines / verbals are not bad ( saying the wrong things ).

By james bond I mean most of the james bond characters are grounded , bit serious and not very funny , not hyper energetic, tonality is moderate monotonous but not very fluctuating.( imagine most james Bonds, Deepak Wayne dating etc their style and persona).
On the opposite end imagine Julian and Owen cook from RSD , kshitij Ironman lifestyle etc ( these guys are very hyper energetic, jovial , laughing lot , fluctuating tonality) which I'm opposite.

So what should I do finally to improve my tonality, undertone ( how I say the lines ) and face expression?
How to enhance my natural self expression ?
Reg your feeling of experiencing being intimate with her , talking, touching her , how and when to feel them ? Is it like imagination or visualization when I'm not interacting with her ? How exactly to apply this in cold approach?

Reg your no need to smile if you enjoy anything, most people genuinely enjoy a sports or video game or drinks/ food.
So if I am approaching in streets or malls or any place especially when I'm waiting , roaming and focusing on verbals and non verbals While reading her non verbals, etc no man can fully enjoy during such contexts .( especially when it is chaotic and I'm already fatigued ) .
So when you are repeatedly approaching, time is running up and you are not getting suitable girls to approach and don't know where you stand in terms of game , don't know where you are making mistake, frustration tends to Slightly seep into . Although I admit I am not hating it , I enjoy and get excited cold approaching but still there is some cluelessness .
I admit I may not fully enjoy cold approaching but definitely atleast slightly I enjoy cold approach.
The ones I fully enjoy are playing football, badminton, video games but unfortunately I don't have even few hot girls there in those activity places.
The places we find most hot girls are on the streets and malls unfortunately.
And are you sure it is not required to smile while cold approaching if I am enjoying internally but my external expression is calm and neutral without smile ? ( even if we are playing the best video game , or experiencing ultimate best sex our face expression won't smile outwards , although internally it is very happy and pleasurable. But it doesn't necessarily cause a smile .

 

[Glow]

Regarding your reply to my 1st question , I mean is tonality undertone including nonverbals ( how you say it ) matters significantly or slightly or somewhat matters like 50/ 50 ? As long as I say the right words and lines ( verbals ) While interacting with a cold approach girl.
By not messing up verbals , I mean my words lines / verbals are not bad ( saying the wrong things ).

By james bond I mean most of the james bond characters are grounded , bit serious and not very funny , not hyper energetic, tonality is moderate monotonous but not very fluctuating.( imagine most james Bonds, Deepak Wayne dating etc their style and persona).
On the opposite end imagine Julian and Owen cook from RSD , kshitij Ironman lifestyle etc ( these guys are very hyper energetic, jovial , laughing lot , fluctuating tonality) which I'm opposite.

So what should I do finally to improve my tonality, undertone ( how I say the lines ) and face expression?
How to enhance my natural self expression ?
Reg your feeling of experiencing being intimate with her , talking, touching her , how and when to feel them ? Is it like imagination or visualization when I'm not interacting with her ? How exactly to apply this in cold approach?

Reg your no need to smile if you enjoy anything, most people genuinely enjoy a sports or video game or drinks/ food.
So if I am approaching in streets or malls or any place especially when I'm waiting , roaming and focusing on verbals and non verbals While reading her non verbals, etc no man can fully enjoy during such contexts .( especially when it is chaotic and I'm already fatigued ) .
So when you are repeatedly approaching, time is running up and you are not getting suitable girls to approach and don't know where you stand in terms of game , don't know where you are making mistake, frustration tends to Slightly seep into . Although I admit I am not hating it , I enjoy and get excited cold approaching but still there is some cluelessness .
I admit I may not fully enjoy cold approaching but definitely atleast slightly I enjoy cold approach.
The ones I fully enjoy are playing football, badminton, video games but unfortunately I don't have even few hot girls there in those activity places.
The places we find most hot girls are on the streets and malls unfortunately.
And are you sure it is not required to smile while cold approaching if I am enjoying internally but my external expression is calm and neutral without smile ? ( even if we are playing the best video game , or experiencing ultimate best sex our face expression won't smile outwards , although internally it is very happy and pleasurable. But it doesn't necessarily cause a smile .

Simple approach:
Drill it everyday 10 min with a camera - just spit game yourself, rehearse the structure and the verbal stack your using, or just riff 10 min.

Record Video, review, apply changes on new video.
Rinse repeat.

Note down the things you wanna change. Make a list you use every time. Search and find some angles on relevant areas that pop up.. Hit drama class to learn expressiveness or alike. Pick a course you like.
The more you use this to also train verbal game the better. But just go.

you can gradually add 3 things
- New verbal techniques
- Your Stack material
- Clean ups/basics eg voice pace, things you might notice like avoiding ec, smiling, shift between being more energetic to calm, firm.

This is about forming new habits - and the video yourself thing is great for this + to rehearse how to spit game.

Think of it like a sport. You need to learn technique, you need to clean out the bads, you need to drill it so that it becomes second nature.

Youll start noticing it just happening when you work it like this.

 

[James D]

@alexhunter8 let me give my observations that I made after talking to you over call on two occasions.

Since you spoke to him @Kshatrap A.V. , I guess you can give the more accurate assessment if he's giving off the James Bond vibe or not.

I've seen certain guys fool themselves into thinking they're James Bond when they're just serious, stiff and reserved invisible wallflowers.

 

[Kshatrap A.V.]

Since you spoke to him @Kshatrap A.V. , I guess you can give the more accurate assessment if he's giving off the James Bond vibe or not.

I've seen certain guys fool themselves into thinking they're James Bond when they're just serious, stiff and reserved invisible wallflowers.

You know if he really gave off james bond vibe without knowing he would have felt so much better in cold approach rather than thinking why he intimates people.

Back when if you remember when i started posting my journey of cold approach i used to think so many limiting things about myself but it was the women themselves who showed me that I was really underestimating myself.

I think that he has deep voice and already in shape,.has a good paying job, can approach. He just need to be bit more self aware and really look inwards while keep on improving his outer game.

@alexhunter8 this is the same @James D I told you about whose style of opening... I modelled mine after.

I do believe that he can improve drastically if he gets proper irl coaching.

 

[alexhunter8]

Since you spoke to him @Kshatrap A.V. , I guess you can give the more accurate assessment if he's giving off the James Bond vibe or not.

I've seen certain guys fool themselves into thinking they're James Bond when they're just serious, stiff and reserved invisible wallflowers.

You are misinterpreting . I didn't mean have james bond bodylanguage/ persona. I just meant most probably my persona style/ bodylanguage/ vibe is more closer to authoritative serious james bond characters type.
On my opposite end we have energetic jovial , funny , extroverted guys like RSD Julian , Owen cook . They are more fluid , funny and laughing a lot . I'm opposite to that .

 

[Jamster]

I particularly like the trumpet solo.