What's new

She was in the middle of a Conversation

ironore

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Dec 10, 2017
Messages
8
I spot a girl that I think is hot. So I use sprezzatura and make my way over to her general area. A couple of minutes have passed since I spotted her and now she is in an intense conversation with a female friend. They are looking at each other in the eyes and talking with a lot of intensity.

So I Listen to the music and casually wait for their conversation to end but they just keep talking and talking. I finally spot another girl nearby who is not so occupied and engage her in a polite conversation. But I have no interest in the girl I just approached. I really just approached for the sake of approaching so I disengaged. But the girl I really wanted was still in an intense conversation with her friend.

How do you guys handle this? Do you just go over and interrupt the conversation? Do you wait patiently wait for the conversation to end? Do you give up on her and look for a girl who is less occupied?
 

Start_ed_young

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 1, 2017
Messages
106
Well iron, there are a few way you could deal with this scenario. The in which you go about really depends on your game but I’ll outline a few options of what this approach could go like, but I’d like to start out by saying personally, if the conversation was so heated that they look like they are either gonna start fighting or crying, I would just leave but if they are just having a friendly conversation when playing your cards right, could be helpfu.

In some cases if a girl is having a conversation with another person already the conversation can be used as a catylyst for your approach. If your game is based on using observations as openers and being indirect, you could easily just say something along the lines of “hey, saw you guys talking and was curious to know what’s the craze about?” Best casemario here is that they let you in on their conversation and you can use this to build rapport with the girl and potentially break off from the other girl and deep dive then close. Worst case they were talking about something important and aren’t in the mood and they will probably say so, but it is always best to go for the approach since you’ll gain the experience and you can tune the way you handle this situation the next time it comes up.

Now, if you game is more of a direct style, you can always use the strategy of acknowledging your actions as odd, rude, or awkward because your interrupting their conversation then lead into a compliment. Example, “ Excuse, me I know you guys were talking and it’s kind of rude to interrupt you guys, but I had to tell you I love the way your dress brings out your eyes, it looks incredible.”

Now, with all this being said, there is always the possibility that the girls are taking about something important or tense and she is in auto reject from the start, but you have to approach to find out. Never just give up on the girl and leave, you could get surprised and come away with a pull, or get further insight as to how you can frame your approach next time

Cheers, Young
 

ironore

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Dec 10, 2017
Messages
8
Start_ed_young, it was an intense conversation. They didn't seem mad or sad, they just looked like they were talking about something extremely important.

I think you are right, I should have approached and learned from it. No matter what the result it would have been a learning experience. I think approaching women in these situations is a mental block I need to overcome.
 

Virgin101

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 17, 2015
Messages
233
I think you valued the outcome too much? Something that can be obvious, but yet very easy to forget! But of course, it wouldn't be nice to be just brushed aside mid sentence of one's opener (which may have taken a while to think of), while their having much more important "adult talk"! I think the best thing to do would be to undermine the seriousness of their conversation with something like a "why so serious?" I think the above poster's 1st recommendation sounded like about all you could do.

There's something not cool about waiting. You couldn't picture James Bond waiting! You're basically waiting, so that you can give the impression that you happened to be walking by at the very time she wasn't talking. So you might feel a bit creepy when approaching because of this. And at the back of her mind, she might sense that it's hardly a coincidence that you've approached at the exact moment she's got a breather. You know what I mean? Think of all the times you've had success with women, and ask yourself how many of those times you were waiting to approach! Now, imagine how much more confident you'd feel if you actually did happen to just be passing at the right time!

I heard a PUA say before, that if you've been staring at a girl wondering how to approach, that the best thing to do, is to go over and say "Hi, I've just been staring at you for the last 10 minutes" in order to take away the creepiness of things!
 

ironore

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Dec 10, 2017
Messages
8
Virgin101 said:
There's something not cool about waiting. You couldn't picture James Bond waiting!

I'm going to read this over and over before I go out this weekend.

Waiting for the right moment is my worst sticking point that has been plaguing me for a long time. The right moment only comes 2 or 3 times a night and that is just not enough to build any sort of momentum.
 

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jul 24, 2015
Messages
2,091
Plain and simple she and her friend were in a conversation and you wanted to interrupt them...Best bet is to make your interruption something that is (or seems to be) more important than what they are talking about. Make it applicable to both of them.

"Hey we are closing up the room and we need to move over into the main hall.."

"Ladies it's last call and this round is on me, let's go grab one for the road..."

"Excuse me Ladies, there is an Uber here for Bella, is it yours?"

Then segue into introducing yourself, and ascertain whether they are going to be willing to talk to you or are annoyed by your interruption. Best bet is to plant a seed of "hey find me when you are done here and I'll tell you more. I can see you guys are catching up."

I've been in the lounge area of a Bar in a restaurant having a conversation with a friend where I had to vent. I was annoyed by the young waiter that kept coming by to ask us if he could get us anything as I was pouring my heart out to my friend....I snapped at him "Listen, I got my drink and I will flag you down when I need another or want to pay the bill. Right now I just want to have this conversation with my friend, Got it? " It was harsh, but necessary after the second interruption. Moral, be more observant than that kid was...
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

ironore

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Dec 10, 2017
Messages
8
Fuck This said:
I've been in the lounge area of a Bar in a restaurant having a conversation with a friend where I had to vent. I was annoyed by the young waiter that kept coming by to ask us if he could get us anything as I was pouring my heart out to my friend....I snapped at him "Listen, I got my drink and I will flag you down when I need another or want to pay the bill. Right now I just want to have this conversation with my friend, Got it? " It was harsh, but necessary after the second interruption. Moral, be more observant than that kid was...

Yes, makes sense. If I interrupt a conversation and the women clearly don't want me to be there after I made an attempt then just let them be and and make a graceful exit.
 

Virgin101

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 17, 2015
Messages
233
ironore said:
Virgin101 said:
There's something not cool about waiting. You couldn't picture James Bond waiting!

I'm going to read this over and over before I go out this weekend.

Waiting for the right moment is my worst sticking point that has been plaguing me for a long time. The right moment only comes 2 or 3 times a night and that is just not enough to build any sort of momentum.
Funnily enough, I was "waiting" for quite a bit last week before I asked a girl out. I was in the library, and my desk was behind hers and facing the same way (albeit quite distance).

We were both studying for a few hours, but before I went over to talk to her, I moved my books to the other side of the desk, with the chair facing the other way (think about it). Then after I asked her out, I walked by to my desk, and I'm guessing she looked around and saw where I was sitting the whole time.
 
Top