Should I cancel these plans or let it unfold?

[Fluxcapacitor]

Over the weekend I scheduled a date with a girl for tonight. She couldn’t confirm if she could make it and said that she would let me know (coming of from night shifts and doesn't know how tired she will be). We talked a little after and then we stopped talking. Before a date I will always drop a check in text to reassure her I haven’t forgot.

With the plans not being 100% confirmed a check in text will remind her on and could improve the odds that this meet happens but also make it look important to me. Not messaging and waiting for her to “let me know” only works if she actually gets in touch, with us making some plans she should really engage. If I remove my availability it prompts her that I won’t sit around on half assed plans and she will have to confirm in the future, but if she can make it and I cancel I waste a great set up. What are your thoughts?

A) Check in text, remind her on and improve odds that this will happen. Reassure her that I haven’t forgot
B) Don’t contact her, wait for her to get in touch. We have plans to an extent and she should engage
C) Cancel and remove my availability to let her know I won’t wait around without definite plans.

I see positives and negatives for all of the above. I think B keeps it open if she gets in touch and I don’t look needy. However it comes at the expense of I will sit around and wait for you to make up your mind which is weak.

Any thoughts?

 

[BigPapa]

Depends . You guys were intimate ?

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@BigPapa no we've never been intimate. Shit logistics on the last date, but the logistics for tonight are great. No messing about, going round her apartment. (If it happens)

 

[DarkKnight]

Since girls are passive as fuck I would vote A. Girls can create ambigious situations and become indesicive because of the ambigiuity that they themselves create.

Anyway just see it as positive or negative compliance when you do "A". Also you won't wonder about "what if". If you do not get the desired results I am pretty sure you will care less then you do now.

Also the weekend is a long time from now, there is a chance that she is not sure whether you want the date to continue.

 

[BigPapa]

I would say that A is not the best option , as she should have said something by now if she was super into you , but in the same time women are super passive like @DarkKnight mentioned . I guess you can shoot her a text and ask her how her adventures look like and do not mention anything about the date till you can not see if she is warm .

With C you look butt hurt

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@BigPapa she will be asleep now, she won't know until later on after she wakes up. I have seen first hand how cranky she is without sleep and truly believe that she is waiting to see what state she is in before cementing plans. I was just persistent on making tonight work as it was my only free night she wasn't working! haha

I do think C will look butt hurt however in a similar incident on indecisive plans @Watts has previously said to take your availability to let them know that you won't sit around and wait for them all night to make up their mind which I see merit in, however realising she will still be asleep at this moment possibly would look more butt hurt than higher value!

I have to agree with @DarkKnight they can become indecisive about ambiguity they have made. If I shoot her up early as a reminder and she decides to cancel tonight, I at least get an answer and the emphasis is on her to reschedule.

 

[BigPapa]

We know for sure that if she wanted to see you , she would have seen you till now . So basically we can say that she is not sure about you just yet

that is why is better to be ambiguous too ,she will know though that you are texting her because of the Planned date but when you will not say anything about it she will start asking herself why are you not asking her about the planned date .In the meantime you will be able to gauge her interest in you and see if she will come directly to your place , because you are kinda tired , or try to meetup another time after she finishes work for a drink

 

[BigPapa]

Thus you do a , b and c in the same time

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@BigPapa she will be asleep for another hour or so from past experience, she won't be up for long before I'm meant to go round. Going for a drink was our previous date with bad logistics which didn't pan out well. I knew we had bad logistics so I didn't escalate as not to have a failed escalation where this one has good logistics.

I get the guaging her interest doing a B and C hybrid though dude I think thats smart, not direct but a good method for checking buying temperature!

 

[BigPapa]

Mysterious are the ways of the game