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SwissXChocolate

Kvothe

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 5, 2017
Messages
872
So was doing daygame approaches today, and was on the last one of the day, and I look over and it's a cute dark haired girl. I opened her by telling her I thought she looked amazing (my current opener that's been working really well on hooking). She said thank you and I talked a little bit, and found out she was from Switzerland and had been here for a few days, and was here for the rest of the month. I told her that we should grab a coffee, and she said "sure, why not". I walked over to a nearby truck, and she ordered water lol. I got one too, since there were no hot drinks available. We went and sat down at a park for a bit, and I started deep diving. Still a little rusty, and not as good leading conversationally. In terms of talking it was like 50-50 me and her. That needs to improve.

So we talked for a bit, and I made some chase frames about how she wanted to watch me to Tai Chi to check me out. She laughed and was enjoying it. I was also doing some touch to her legs, since we were seated across from each other. I do the deep dive and compare life here and life in Zurich. I mention how being here grants privacy and people don't have to know each other's business (communicating discretion). It's a fun, not too heavy conversation, and about halfway through the bottle of water I suggest we grab drinks nearby at a bar I know.

We walk there, and get two drinks, I pay for this and tell her she can cover the next one, to which she agrees. We sit and drink for a bit, sitting side by side, and I try to increase the incidental touch of our legs touching, and touch her arms and stuff. After some more talking, I suggest we play some shuffleboard. I'm much more physical here, giving high fives and holding her hand, though I can tell she's not as comfortable with holding hands. I also grab her around the waist, with no hesitation, and she doesn't seem to mind. We play some more, and I can feel the sexual tension in my dick getting hard (surprisingly good metric for sexual tension). We finish the game and she wins, and I suggest we grab a drink elsewhere.

I ask if she's down to view the river and grab some wine, and she's not down, then I remember that there's a bar very near my place (which is going to be my go to second venue from now on). We go and we talk. She uses the bathroom and comes with the intention of sitting across from me, but I pat the seat next to me and tell her to sit next to me, since it feels too much like an interview. She does so, but she leaves a large gap between us. I pretend not to notice and talk with her some more. I mention my dogs and she shows me hers, which I use as an excuse to get closer. I show her mine next. I'm touching her upper back, lower neck, and leaving my hand there, and she's still smiling. Her pupils are larger than normal too. I can tell she likes me, and she has asked me multiple times about where I live and what time I go to bed at, so I feel like she's ready to pull.

Instead of suggesting going straight home, I tell her that we should go down closer to mine (another block away and a minute from my apartment). I point down the street and tell her it's right there. We go down, and we hang there for a bit. She's still not coming to close to me, but she's not standing as far. At this point, I had been holding in my pee so that I'd have an excuse to go up, and I tell her I need to pee, and that we can call her an uber right after. She's not down, and I have to call her a car. I tell her we can wait in the lobby, and we do that until the car comes. We hug, and I give her a peck on the cheek (blegh).

I text her once the uber reaches her place.

Will try to get her out again in the next couple of days, and hopefully will be able to segue that into a pull.

Things I should have done to improve:

1. Use a yes ladder at the end to persuade her to come up for a bit
2. Use more deep diving and building intrigue about myself
3. Touch more calibrated and get her to touch me
 
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NewBeeWinner

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
364
Kvothe,

Sounds like you have a pretty solid hold on what you could've done better and on leading the interaction (+1 for the good logistics).

Some quick things that I noticed and some suggestions:

- You had a large gap between you at the bar, but you ended up touching her upper back, lower neck, etc while sharing dog pictures. How did you close this gap? It sounds like you closed it. One thing you might be interested in is using a compliance ladder. Seems like she was hesitant with you at times and you could help her grow in trust using one. Guide her through getting closer to you or just say "you're a bit too far for me to hear you. scoot closer" or "check out these pictures of my dog - oh, you'll have to get closer to see" or something like that

- Why did you wait on taking her home if you felt she was ready to pull? You could suggest to go for a walk and then end up at your place. Then make her feel a bit more comfortable before escalating (you should be escalating before you reach your place, but you get the idea).

Seems like she didn't trust to be close with you just yet. Let her feel comfortable with touching you (like you noticed after). You could even use a compliance ladder here. How are you framing this? Are you being sexual at all in your verbal/non-verbal communication? A big part of seduction is allowing her to feel she can be wild/herself with you and feeling allowed to be physical with you.

Just some thoughts.

NBW
 

Fuck This

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jul 24, 2015
Messages
2,092
Did you walk anywhere together? Take her hand in your arm...has a couple advantages....It is HER touching you. You are leading, while being a gentle man but not being needy gripping/holding her hand. Your bodies are actually closer together, and it lets her escalate the touch by hugging your arm if she is interested. You can get a pretty food indication of her interest level by how she responds to that. If she starts rubbing your arm with her Breast...You are in...

joshua-jackson-diane-kruger-walk-arm-in-arm-in-big-apple-02.jpg


couple-walking-outdoors-arm-arm-smiling-5931442.jpg


main-qimg-9bf6b1fe579825cc5e578ea0a3241bf2
 

Grand Pooba

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
1,465
Location
NYC
Fuck This said:
Did you walk anywhere together? Take her hand in your arm...has a couple advantages....It is HER touching you. You are leading, while being a gentle man but not being needy gripping/holding her hand. Your bodies are actually closer together, and it lets her escalate the touch by hugging your arm if she is interested. You can get a pretty food indication of her interest level by how she responds to that. If she starts rubbing your arm with her Breast...You are in...

joshua-jackson-diane-kruger-walk-arm-in-arm-in-big-apple-02.jpg


couple-walking-outdoors-arm-arm-smiling-5931442.jpg


main-qimg-9bf6b1fe579825cc5e578ea0a3241bf2

Another variant of this that I like to do is to grip around her upper shoulder (right where the arm meets the body) and basically walk/lead her around like a unit.

Best done after some touch or incidental contact has already been accepted.
 

Kvothe

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 5, 2017
Messages
872
Good advice all around, I'll take it into account. Compliance ladders and making touch more cooperative are things I can work on and keep in mind.
 
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