Wealth Uncertainty about how I value money/career vs. women

[770]

I’m 24 and have been fortunate to have around 470k net worth and the majority of it is liquid. I’m only in this position because my parents supported me in college and I got a high paying software engineering job after graduated and lived with my parents rent-free. It also has to do with the fact I got lucky with job market timing and the strength of the US tech economy, and excellent returns on investing in the US total stock market.

Between late 23-24 y/o I didn’t make much as I took a lot of time off after realizing that my life satisfaction / overall happiness was at extreme low due to my lack of abundance with women and social skills. I also recently got fired for job performance as I lost motivation to work. I pretty much took stock of my situation and realized my long-term outlook with women is extremely poor and I need to make massive changes that seem to be more important than my career at the moment.

I feel like I’m operating on a different paradigm than most people as most people are concerned about making money and having enough savings to survive. To me, accumulating more money through extensive time commitment in my 20’s is highly unappealing as I feel I already have enough and much more than the average American for my age. And on top of that, I value new experiences (esp. with women) more than making more money at this point.

In my opinion, I am far better off experiencing things like improving with women and cold approach, and traveling when I’m still young. This is the rough plan, and something that feels inevitable for me. However there is a trade-off as I could be stacking more money that would compound even more.

Because of this unconventional path I’m taking, I feel a little insecure as being unemployed feels a little embarrassing even if it’s right for me in the short term, and the other aspect is constantly debating if the opportunity cost of skills with women/accumulating skills with women is greater than compounded growth of money and growing my career.

I'm much more satisfied with my life now than working my corporate job before. This year after I recovered from my breakup, I dated and had sex with two new women (the girl I broke up with was my first and I dated her for several years), as well as went on dates with around 10 women, the majority of which I could have bedded if I had better skills. Even though this is a small milestone, I feel over the moon about this accomplishment as I’m a huge newbie, and I'm definitely hungry for more.

Currently I’m betting on that this little adventure should vastly improve my life and quality with women and touch with reality in general, compared to sitting and coding all day for the rest of my twenties something that I'm not even talented at. I understand I could have done both at the same time, but I am mediocre at programming so it basically took up of my entire capacity.

I’m just uncertain about how long I should go about chasing skirts and traveling, and when I should get back on the road of employment and stable income. The truth is I know that I can’t do this forever even though it would be tempting to travel across the world in my twenties and accumulate lays until my money runs out.

What do you guys think, am I overvaluing experiences with women or is this a good bet?

 

[OldGuy]

If you really are a mediocre programmer, you should also be thinking about what field to go in when you do start employment again.

 

[Energy]

I am mediocre at programming so it basically took up of my entire capacity.

Programming is really hard for us since it required long time alone in order to learn and focus and do the best. I too am in nearly the same situation. I feel like guys who are wiling to sacrifice their social life are outrunning me.

 

[D. Gately]

As an older man, the best advice I can give you is, 'You're only young once.' It's never a mistake to travel.

Also, if you are worried about making money in a few years after traveling, anyone with above-average intelligence will be able to find work doing something that pays, whether AI-related or not.

Maybe you'd even have more fun being....making something up.... a concierge at a high-end hotel? Not everything will be tech-focused.

I focused mainly on stacking cash until I was 31 [not including grad school], don't get me wrong I had plenty of fun in NYC but could have had way more fun and dated more widely than I did. I felt like I had to be a serial monogamist to have regular sex with someone I liked, given the expense of Manhattan and hours spent working v socializing.

 

[mirror]

What do you guys think, am I overvaluing experiences with women or is this a good bet?

Dont quit your job for women. Quit your job for selfimprovement and getting a better perspective on what you want your footprint on the world to be. Skills with women and with life will be worthwhile longterm too, but in the end what will give you long term satisfaction is what you achieve with your life.

Regarding job <-> money:
if you do it right, you use the money to make more money. Find out what the right place to invest is. Then live from the return of investment, while you work out what your next path is. Chasing girls isnt going to make you more valuable to girls , hence I am not really pro the whole : try to become a fulltime seducer, idea. Unless it's part of networking and your job/long term goals. A job is a vehicle to land at the place you want to be in terms of power, money or influence. For some people it also includes fame, status and lifestyle.

 

[Daedalus]

This sounds interesting.

In hindsight, I regret spending my twenties building businesses for money.

After they failed, all I got to show for the time was "business skills" and lost memories of sterile screens between empty walls.

(And a few dozen countries traveled to, a loving marriage, all that stuff the businesses supported while they ran.)

If you're going to give your time to work of any kind, make sure you love it.

You don't need money at this point. You need to figure out what you love doing. So focus on that.

Try everything under the sun.

Do courses, write, dance, see what it takes to build various types of businesses, travel, ponder what makes you feel meaning in your life.

The first thing to optimize for is to make your money last, and figure out how to spend it best.

Here are some options I see to do that while building some kind of income for the future:

1) Build a business.

The ROI can be 10x+ and beat any investment you can make. But it's not passive at first; it's risky and takes years.

I wouldn't recommend building a business if you don't feel drawn to a mission and just want the cash. It will just burn you out.

My business is currently taking up almost all of my time, but once it succeeds, it will free me to pursue any lifestyle I want for the rest of my life.

The freedom is not in the delegation, but in the love of the work, regardless of whether or when it grows to full delegation.

If you go this route, don't pour all of it into the startup, but just enough to learn; first start-ups tend to fail as you're still learning the (many) skills a business takes to become successful. Consider it the best real-world business education.

But it sounds like you don't want to work 12h almost every day at this point.

The way to decide if to go into business or not is this: Is this something you'd want to do forever? To never sell or fully delegate? If not, it'll be a drain on your time and energy.

It's a way to choose meaningful work, not a way to avoid work.

Teaching a high-ticket group coaching program is the best business model I know today, if you plan to go this way. If you have something worth teaching, that is...

2) Create and monetize art you love.

Find an activity you enjoy that brings in a little money and attracts women to you. Do you have any talent for singing, acting, fiction writing, comedy, dance...?

You can improve faster than you expect with private coaching, regular intensive practice, and daily micro-touches.

You could use some of that money to fund marketing for your art, e.g., by boosting top-performing posts, buying professional covers, etc.

Do something you love, ideally something that women also love.

3) Move somewhere with cheap living costs.

With $500k in the bank, especially if you put it into safe mutual funds or something, you could live like a king forever in many parts of Eastern Asia, Eastern Europe, South America...

While living here, you could either build a remote business you believe in or become skilled at some art form you love.

It also helps to feel independent, to have your own place to bring women to, without it being a big drain on your savings.

If I were in your situation, I'd do all three:

• Move to Bali or something like that where I can live like a king on $2K per month,
• Put some $400K into S&P500 or NASDAQ or something that brings me $24K+ per year to live off of there,
• Spend $50K on trying out everything I can to figure out what I love to do,
• Spend another $50K to build stuff I love and market it (and ultimately sell it) as a first business.

You're in a great life situation. Young and rich (by many countries' standards).

Great success to you!