- Joined
- Dec 12, 2019
- Messages
- 287
Hey guys, this were 2 night in a row I felt I could've pulled the girl. Please correct my analysis if you think it's off.
Friday
Pre approach, building preselection
I have couple of friends in the death metal scene from some time ago, who always invite me to their concerts but I never go. This time I went. I don't know how death metal shows are in other countries, but here are just boring. Just dudes smelling like beer standing like oaks listening to music they can't hear because the sound is so bad and illegally loud. I like listening to it at home when I can hear what's going on though.
So there I was wanting to make things fun for myself. I don't believe in the whole inner game spiel but here this was crucial. I went to the first row, started jumping, dancing with my female friend, making a small mosh pits with her (playfully) and was the center of the whole hall (everyone wallflowering, kinda funny). Another girl saw the fun and was trying to join and I included her. Also made some eye contact and chatted with 2 other girls in the audience during that.
The girl I included in the ''mosh pit'' had her eyes sparking and looked like she was looking for my attention during the entire concert.
After the concert I missed the first opportunity to talk to her, waited a bit then striked.
The Approach
The following happened in 15min.
Saw her chatting with this lame guy near the bar. Body rocking I said ''do I know you from somewhere'' made some small talk then grabbed her number. Seeing her interest in me going up, I blocked out the dude with proximity and body language. He walked away after a min or so. We made some awkward small talk... I'm saying awkward because we have completely different backgrounds plus she was not the talkative type. But body language was on point.
Tried escalating with verbals at first, pacing her reality as a girl out being different as being a guy out, all the creepy dudes catcalling you, trying to get your attention and such. Didn't seem to work. Then dhv a bit too much borderline bragging haha didn't really want to just saying whatever came to mind before I figure the next move. While we were talking a guy from the band came past, we made quick talk, then another girl came by and tried to talk to me (more a friend then anything else, not my type), kept circle with my girl super closed off to the point she asked ''am I bothering you'' to which I said ''not really, we're just talking''. More preselection actually.
Then I lead her out for a smoke. Finally made a cold read that landed her being a ''rebelde'' girl when growing up (a girly teen band/ telenovela). Hugs on high point, trying on her glasses then brushing hair away from glasses while putting them back on her. Was so close we could make out. Was thinking of that, I'm sure she was too.
Here goes the fuck up.
Asked her if she had enough to drink or should we get another beer somewhere (I'm sober and was kinda assessing her drunkness because of the fast escalation, don't want anything to go wrong...). She said no and that she would like to go somewhere else, here looks like it's dying. I suggested my place where I have some beers from the party a week ago left. She of course said yeah sure... but I don't know about your place. Duh, genius on my part, should've just said a place, or the afterparty or whatever else. Then I made it worse kidding that I wanted to add her to my collection of kidnapped people I have in my basement. Like what the fuck haha But this part suprisingly didn't bother her, maybe it's the death metal dark humor, I don't know... Then suggested another bar close by, figured I can venue hop and then pull. She agreed. I said great I'm just gonna say good bye to friends, she said she has to call her sister, then we go. The call made her change her mind.
When I come back she was gone. Next day I look her up on facebook, see she's in a relationship. That contributed to the fuck up... But hey, we're texting now.
Mistakes were leaving her alone, saying my place instead of just leading her, because she would've followed and not building enough trust.
Saturday
Extended Social circle rave
To contrast this next seduction was a really long one. A friend was having her dj set in this gay/ lesbian venue. I knew half the people there and I didn't want to make mistakes. That was a mistake ironically.
Came there at midnight, just dancing, getting myself relaxed (was a bit anxious that night). Made 2 approaches, one blase and I just went on, the other too logical for me. Then was introduced to this girl through mutual friends. We were sitting with friends in front of the club in a circle. Saw her looking at me here and there from the other part of the circle then went in to grab another alco free beer came back and sat next to her. My verbals again weren't flowing so smoothly as I wanted them to. She was responding very well to me being a challenge though - ''tell me something interesting'' then she really thought and told me something for example...
Touch was there. I held her palm and let it linger there when ''testing how cold she is'' (it was cold outside). Still we're surrounded by mutual acquaintances from left and right, my brain was going in overload trying to figure out a smooth transition to sex talk that would leave out the rest of the group... The problem was she was also not very talkative just looking at me, complying to small requests and a couple of friends were always halfway in when I said something...
Here I could've done a couple of things. Translated my gambits at home (I still flow better at them in English), be better prepared, closed our circle and cut off other people or just blatantly moved her, I mean she was compliant...
But I didn't. I think here was my mistake, not wanting to make mistakes, being to careful. From here on just domino effect.
So it was half this and half going in dancing. I must say I'm dog shit at dance floor game. But she was compliant. She had a camera and I told her to take a photo of me, then she gave me camera told me to make photos of her while dancing, some awkward dancing back to back (she was 10cm higher then me) and made an uncalibrated move touching her small of the back when wanting to dance with her later but didn't do it confidently enough I guess. Well still she was compliant, this girl was giving me a lot of leeway. Although less and less. Here I could've isolated her as well (''lets go for a smoke, get a drink'') even easier then when sitting before. But I was too much in my head.
This was going back and fourth for a couple of hours with both of us hanging with other people in between.
At the end of the night she flat out said she needs a place to crash. I offered my couch to which she would've agreed if our mutual sassy ass gay aquaintance said ''uuuhh but what else does that mean''... motherfucker. Triggered ASD of course from which I didn't recover. Looking for ways to persist, not triggering this gay fucker again I hesitated too much and she decided she'll go home by bus.
I'm 92% sure she wanted to go home with me. This was one of the most frustrating outings so far. Being in front of so many people who know me made me get in my sober head, having a weak frame. Also this people are just straight up annoying sometimes, one bitch was playing super interested in the beginning of the night then turned sassy and made out for 5min in front of me in the club looking at me like if I'll respond, then left the dance floor when she saw nothing from me, fucking weird. This people bring negative value to my life, just annoying.
I digress. My mistakes happened way before the final check mate. Mistake was not isolating her in the first place, building strong enough social frame or compliance to just follow me and override the later triggered ASD. Not having enough balls to just lead in front of our acquaintances, caring to much about what people think.
Friday
Pre approach, building preselection
I have couple of friends in the death metal scene from some time ago, who always invite me to their concerts but I never go. This time I went. I don't know how death metal shows are in other countries, but here are just boring. Just dudes smelling like beer standing like oaks listening to music they can't hear because the sound is so bad and illegally loud. I like listening to it at home when I can hear what's going on though.
So there I was wanting to make things fun for myself. I don't believe in the whole inner game spiel but here this was crucial. I went to the first row, started jumping, dancing with my female friend, making a small mosh pits with her (playfully) and was the center of the whole hall (everyone wallflowering, kinda funny). Another girl saw the fun and was trying to join and I included her. Also made some eye contact and chatted with 2 other girls in the audience during that.
The girl I included in the ''mosh pit'' had her eyes sparking and looked like she was looking for my attention during the entire concert.
After the concert I missed the first opportunity to talk to her, waited a bit then striked.
The Approach
The following happened in 15min.
Saw her chatting with this lame guy near the bar. Body rocking I said ''do I know you from somewhere'' made some small talk then grabbed her number. Seeing her interest in me going up, I blocked out the dude with proximity and body language. He walked away after a min or so. We made some awkward small talk... I'm saying awkward because we have completely different backgrounds plus she was not the talkative type. But body language was on point.
Tried escalating with verbals at first, pacing her reality as a girl out being different as being a guy out, all the creepy dudes catcalling you, trying to get your attention and such. Didn't seem to work. Then dhv a bit too much borderline bragging haha didn't really want to just saying whatever came to mind before I figure the next move. While we were talking a guy from the band came past, we made quick talk, then another girl came by and tried to talk to me (more a friend then anything else, not my type), kept circle with my girl super closed off to the point she asked ''am I bothering you'' to which I said ''not really, we're just talking''. More preselection actually.
Then I lead her out for a smoke. Finally made a cold read that landed her being a ''rebelde'' girl when growing up (a girly teen band/ telenovela). Hugs on high point, trying on her glasses then brushing hair away from glasses while putting them back on her. Was so close we could make out. Was thinking of that, I'm sure she was too.
Here goes the fuck up.
Asked her if she had enough to drink or should we get another beer somewhere (I'm sober and was kinda assessing her drunkness because of the fast escalation, don't want anything to go wrong...). She said no and that she would like to go somewhere else, here looks like it's dying. I suggested my place where I have some beers from the party a week ago left. She of course said yeah sure... but I don't know about your place. Duh, genius on my part, should've just said a place, or the afterparty or whatever else. Then I made it worse kidding that I wanted to add her to my collection of kidnapped people I have in my basement. Like what the fuck haha But this part suprisingly didn't bother her, maybe it's the death metal dark humor, I don't know... Then suggested another bar close by, figured I can venue hop and then pull. She agreed. I said great I'm just gonna say good bye to friends, she said she has to call her sister, then we go. The call made her change her mind.
When I come back she was gone. Next day I look her up on facebook, see she's in a relationship. That contributed to the fuck up... But hey, we're texting now.
Mistakes were leaving her alone, saying my place instead of just leading her, because she would've followed and not building enough trust.
Saturday
Extended Social circle rave
To contrast this next seduction was a really long one. A friend was having her dj set in this gay/ lesbian venue. I knew half the people there and I didn't want to make mistakes. That was a mistake ironically.
Came there at midnight, just dancing, getting myself relaxed (was a bit anxious that night). Made 2 approaches, one blase and I just went on, the other too logical for me. Then was introduced to this girl through mutual friends. We were sitting with friends in front of the club in a circle. Saw her looking at me here and there from the other part of the circle then went in to grab another alco free beer came back and sat next to her. My verbals again weren't flowing so smoothly as I wanted them to. She was responding very well to me being a challenge though - ''tell me something interesting'' then she really thought and told me something for example...
Touch was there. I held her palm and let it linger there when ''testing how cold she is'' (it was cold outside). Still we're surrounded by mutual acquaintances from left and right, my brain was going in overload trying to figure out a smooth transition to sex talk that would leave out the rest of the group... The problem was she was also not very talkative just looking at me, complying to small requests and a couple of friends were always halfway in when I said something...
Here I could've done a couple of things. Translated my gambits at home (I still flow better at them in English), be better prepared, closed our circle and cut off other people or just blatantly moved her, I mean she was compliant...
But I didn't. I think here was my mistake, not wanting to make mistakes, being to careful. From here on just domino effect.
So it was half this and half going in dancing. I must say I'm dog shit at dance floor game. But she was compliant. She had a camera and I told her to take a photo of me, then she gave me camera told me to make photos of her while dancing, some awkward dancing back to back (she was 10cm higher then me) and made an uncalibrated move touching her small of the back when wanting to dance with her later but didn't do it confidently enough I guess. Well still she was compliant, this girl was giving me a lot of leeway. Although less and less. Here I could've isolated her as well (''lets go for a smoke, get a drink'') even easier then when sitting before. But I was too much in my head.
This was going back and fourth for a couple of hours with both of us hanging with other people in between.
At the end of the night she flat out said she needs a place to crash. I offered my couch to which she would've agreed if our mutual sassy ass gay aquaintance said ''uuuhh but what else does that mean''... motherfucker. Triggered ASD of course from which I didn't recover. Looking for ways to persist, not triggering this gay fucker again I hesitated too much and she decided she'll go home by bus.
I'm 92% sure she wanted to go home with me. This was one of the most frustrating outings so far. Being in front of so many people who know me made me get in my sober head, having a weak frame. Also this people are just straight up annoying sometimes, one bitch was playing super interested in the beginning of the night then turned sassy and made out for 5min in front of me in the club looking at me like if I'll respond, then left the dance floor when she saw nothing from me, fucking weird. This people bring negative value to my life, just annoying.
I digress. My mistakes happened way before the final check mate. Mistake was not isolating her in the first place, building strong enough social frame or compliance to just follow me and override the later triggered ASD. Not having enough balls to just lead in front of our acquaintances, caring to much about what people think.
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