4 Signs Shes Sexually Interested In You

[Warped Mindless]

If you have been in the seduction community for more than a few months you have undoubtedly came across an article that tells you the sings that a woman is attracted to you. These signs probably have included things like playing with her hair and laughing at your jokes. I’m here to tell you right now that 99.9% of all those articles suck.

Why? Two big problems here:

1) Most signs the community teach are actually bullshit. Women naturally play with their hair, they smile to be polite, and they laugh at your jokes because your amusing. None of those things means that a woman has any sexual interest in you.

2) A chick can like you but not be sexually available. For instance, lets say you meet a chick outside a coffee shop and strike up a conversation. Shes playing with her hair, she smiles, she even laughs at your jokes…. surely she must want to lay down and spread her legs for you, right? Nope. She could very well like you but that doesn’t mean she wants to or plans on sleeping with you. Perhaps she has a boyfriend that she deeply loves and is in a happy relationship with. Maybe her dog or a family member died the day before and shes simply not emotionally open to sleeping with a guy right now.

The big problem with the whole “X number of signs shes interested in you” type articles is that the sings are bullshit and that often it doesn’t matter if she likes you because if you want to experience the softness of her inner thighs then she needs to be sexually interested in you.

With those problems in mind the rest of this article will outline the sings that a woman is sexually interested in you. Lets get on with it…

1) She makes it easy for you to “game” her. If a woman has sexual interest in you and wants to sleep with you but you aren’t progressing things forward, she will often put herself in a position that makes it easy for you.

She might scoot closer to you on the couch. She could girl-code her girlfriends telling them to leave you alone. She may bend over and let you catch a glimpse of her thong. This is anything a chick does that makes it easy for you to escalate on her or also anything she does to try and get you to escalate things.

2) Movement. When in clubs I follow my "20 minute rule." Basically, if i’m in a club talking to a chick, if after 20 minutes passes I don’t feel like there is a very good chance I’ll be taking her home tonight then I move on and talk to some other woman. If at that 20 minute mark I’m not sure then I attempt to move her. This is as simple as “hey, come outside with me to get fresh air” or even “hey, lets go to the bar.”

If after 20 minutes a chick refuses to move with you, shes not very likely to want to go home with you. The other thing could be that your escalating to slow and not moving things forward at a proper pace. However, failing that, if she wont move with you then she likely doesn’t have much sexual interest in you.

3) Sex talk. This one is really easy. If after 20 minutes she won’t engage in any conversation relating to the subject of sex, she has no sexual interest in you. However, if your talking about sex (and not being crude), and shes into it then there is a very good chance she has some sexual interest in you. Escalate and move things forward pronto.

4) Escalation. This is by far the most important sign out of all four of them. A big problem most guys have is that they talk to a woman and think she likes him but at the end of the night she gives him a pat on the back and a “nice to meet you.” This confuses our would-be Casanova because she laughed, played with her hair, and seemed to enjoy herself. Hell, she probably did. Her being amused by him does not equal her wanting to sleep with him, however.

Sexual Escalation is awesome because not only does it weed out those kinds of girls but it shows us, for sure, if a chick is sexually interested in you. No woman is going to let you amp of the sexuality and move things forward unless she wants it to happen. Getting good at sexual escalation will help you save a ton of time weeding out women who aren’t really interested in you and will help you lay the ones who are. To learn even more about sexual escalation you can check out my ESP Model of Escalation article.

Okay guys, just to recap: It doesn’t matter if a chick is playing with her hair, laughing at your jokes, or smiling at you. If you want to get laid then what matters is that shes putting herself into a position to be seduced, she give you solid investment (movement), and she allows you to continually escalate on her. Don’t waste time on women who are only talking to you to be polite and/or to be amused.

 

[Jay]

Warped,

Good article man, and I agree that things like a girl smiling, playing with her hair, and laughing are not absolute signs that she wants your dick in an around her holes. What many of the articles that say things like this are implying is not that these signs are sure fire signals that she will fuck you, but that she is somewhat receptive to you. Basically they are just signs that a girl hasn't gone into auto rejection, so your window is still open.

However, when it comes to a girl playing with her hair, I have observed that there are many different ways a girl will go about this, a few of them very distinctive and telling. A lot of what message she is unconsciously sending with hair playing is just a small piece of reading body language relating to eye contact, attention, and facial expression, and varies from female to female. For example, say you hit on three girls and focus on how they touch their hair during the conversation. Girl number 1 is slowly twisting a piece of her hair, paying only partial attention to you, with a dead look and the occasional smile, laugh and nod to show you she is still listening part of the time. Girl number two is rapidly playing with her hair and is clearly listening to you with lots of eye contact, and her facial expression changes with the conversation. Girl number three is playing with her hair slowly and deliberately, and is staring intently at you with a sly, sexy smile as you talk, like she isn't listening to what you are saying but rather is imagining the two of you in bed together.

Girl number one is clearly disinterested. She is still playing with her hair, but more slowly and with boredom than any interest in you. In this situation you have either lost the girl's interest or never had it to begin with. Girl number two is clearly showing interest in you, with rapid hair playing and obvious attention. The way girl 2 is playing with her hair suggests a nervous habit rather than boredom, and (especially with younger girls and girls that feel outclassed by you and awed by your presence) is a pretty good indication of her interest in you, unless she happens to have Tourettes or ADHD. Girl number three is playing with her hair slowly, like girl number one, but in a deliberate, sexual way. This is also a sign of obvious interest.

With girl 3, you need to escalate as soon as possible. With girl 2, I would try to move her first and make sure the conversation has a sexual frame, because sudden escalation might freak a nervous girl out at first and lead to more resistance than necessary. With girl 1, I would suggest either moving to a more interested girl or even calling her out for not paying attention to you. I have caught a few girls off guard like this, and it seems to shift the power back to me in the conversation; however its tricky to pull off because you must confront her sexily, confidently, and decisively, otherwise it won't work.

I rambled a bit but basically my point is that hair playing can go both ways, but shouldn't be ignored completely because in conjunction with other body language it can become a strong signal.

Also, your signs are all spot on in my book except for this one...

3) Sex talk. This one is really easy. If after 20 minutes she won’t engage in any conversation relating to the subject of sex, she has no sexual interest in you. However, if your talking about sex (and not being crude), and shes into it then there is a very good chance she has some sexual interest in you. Escalate and move things forward pronto.

I've found that bringing up sex in a sexual joking way is ok, but I have found that it doesn't really add to much sexual tension. When I'm gaming a girl I feel like giving her an obvious sexual comment breaks the sexual tension too much. I don't want to give any conversational ground to her sexually until she is really, really ready for me, then I rapidly escalate. Granted there are exceptions, and I have had a few pickups that just consisted of me opening a girl with dirty talk, and moving from there, but that is a rare occurrence and requires very tight game and the right situation to pull off when it happens. Girls also can be very much interested in you without being receptive to sex talk. I have had numerous girls who I never said a word to about anything sexual hook up, have sex with, and ask me later why I didn't close them. All girls are different as well, and if you throw out a sexual comment to a girl who just doesn't like to discuss that shit verbally, you could hurt rather than help your chances.

With that said, escalation is indeed the most obvious indication of interest. The best way to find out if a girl wants you or not is to try and take her to bed. Though you risk being wrong, if you are right, you saved yourself a load of time with relatively minimal risk.

Jay

 

[PinotNoir]

I feel like 20 minutes is a long time, or is that just me? I'd shorten it to 10 min.

 

[Jay]

I agree with Pinot, bout 15 was my max when I was starting out, narrowing my timeframe for movement helped me learn to move things quick.