This came as a total surprise to me since I was not looking to flirt or meet anyone last Saturday. I was wearing comfortable clothes:
*Polyester hood sweater underneath my black jacket. I had a blue, wool sweater next to my skin (October evenings are cold in Norway).
*Blue jeans and my favorite Adidas leather boots (brown).
The girl:
*A black dress. Tight to her body, accentuating her slim figure.
*Brown hair, green eyes. Tall 180 cm and wearing boots with heels making her at least 5 cm taller.
*43-year-old divorcee.
I was invited to my friends 50-th birthday. Which consisted of dinner and a concert (a lot of the guests are musicians, some full time and other -like me - doing it on their spare time). People from almost all ages attended, but most of the guests were in their 40s. As I arrive the party, I realize that I came a little later than the other guests. I try to go to my table unnoticed and sit at the nearest free seat. I realize that the guest (43-yo) sitting next to me was a cutie. I try not to check her out as much and instead listen to all the speeches before the dinner. We start eating and she starts a conversation with me.
Starts flirting and likes my chase frame
At this time I wasn't sure if she was flirting with me or just being nice. I had a couple of older women before and love them for their intellect and for being more sexually adventurous. Many of them are however either married or have a lot of reservations when it comes to flirting with younger guys. But I was in this for the fun and to see what could happen (which I just realized is the best mindset to have anyways).
We start talking about her trips to different countries and some of the jobs she had through the years. She asks me a couple of questions about what I do and so on. I tell her, but still not too much. But it wasn't that easy since it turns out she is a very good conversationalist.
Sexual tension can be too high
I move her out to take some fresh air. She does not follow at first so I go by myself and let her talk to her friend (she was still liking it, but also reserved when I tried to move forward). She eventually follows and I see this as an opportunity to escalate further. I build up tension and keep on building and then a still moment between us. I look at her eyes and even triangulate, only for her to break the tension.
Another lesson about tension: it is better if you break it than her doing it. Now she was leading the dance a little more.
As we get inside another concert starts. And she ignores me when it ends (almost flipped out, but I was going for sprezzatura here). I started conversations with other people. Not trying to look her way. I even thought I lost her so I sat at a couch nearby minding my own business.
She the squeezes my hand back. I could feel that we had a sexual connection. She starts mingling with the other guests again and wile I was eating, even more, food (buffet). I was very tired and a part of me was screaming to get home, but now that I was flirting heavy with this woman I just have to hang in there just "to find out" what could happen.
Logistics and last minute resistance
Then the host wants me on stage to sing a ballad I composed last year. I usually lose girls after singing. Don't know why, but it feels like I get too unattainable after performing (I've been singing for 22 years now). I usually don't make a big deal out of my singing, but people (especially girls) make it more than it is. So singing is something I don't show until the girl knows me very well. But this is another topic I want to explore further in another post.
After singing my song I get off. And this woman starts looking my way a lot. I try to ignore her and not look too eager. I send her a text.
The bar starts to close and I move out, waiting for her to follow me. As I look through the windows from the outside I can see her slowly putting on her jackets. She comes outside and starts talking to a dude that had a conversation with me. I tried to end it gracefully and we started walking with her and her friend.
One little note about friends of girls that I am about to seduce. Chase pointed out in an article that when they see some connection they usually let us be alone. In this case, it was very clear from early on, even after getting interrupted a couple of times throughout the whole interaction.
She starts playing with my height (170cm) and still giving me some heat (playfully) for my youth. I say "hey it's all about new adventures". She starts smiling and again squeezes my hand. We start going to my street and I ask her if she wants to see my cat (the best line ever).
I lead her to the bedroom and start kissing her. She gives me resistance. And then I remember reading a post in this forum about getting naked yourself before taking her clothes off. I do this, but instead of doing it myself I ask her to do it for me while touching my whole body at the same time. It worked and we made love the whole night. 6 times or so.
Final thoughts
The morning after I follow her to the train station. And spend some time asking about her impression of me. She tells me she was apprehensive about going to bed with me, but changed her mind when I said "who cares about age?". She tells me she hasn't had any (sex) for more than a year and saw this as an opportinity to "try something new" (a guy younger and smaller). She also loved my intellect and the fact that I was being so forward with her.
And another thing, noone saw us leaving the place (other than her friend). Keeping it down low is key.
I also saw other girls looking my way when I was at the concert. I mostly ignored these signs other than using them as proof of pre-selection (mingling a bit, but not moving them along). I have made some mistakes in this department. Flirting with women and enjoying the attention can make some girls auto-reject (I know I would do the same if a woman I was flirting with, suddenly starts doing the same with other guys).
Things I could do better:
Sometimes sexual tension gets too high. I need to try using humor from time to time.
Handling interruptions could be smoother.
Better control of my own emotions (this is not a big issue in cold approach pick-up), but moreso in the latter stages of seduction.
Things I am getting good at
Leading.
Being able to recognize when I am out of control (emotionally).
Discretion in seduction is key (an eye opener).
Handling objections.
Handling last minute resistance.
Taking care of her emotions.
*Polyester hood sweater underneath my black jacket. I had a blue, wool sweater next to my skin (October evenings are cold in Norway).
*Blue jeans and my favorite Adidas leather boots (brown).
The girl:
*A black dress. Tight to her body, accentuating her slim figure.
*Brown hair, green eyes. Tall 180 cm and wearing boots with heels making her at least 5 cm taller.
*43-year-old divorcee.
I was invited to my friends 50-th birthday. Which consisted of dinner and a concert (a lot of the guests are musicians, some full time and other -like me - doing it on their spare time). People from almost all ages attended, but most of the guests were in their 40s. As I arrive the party, I realize that I came a little later than the other guests. I try to go to my table unnoticed and sit at the nearest free seat. I realize that the guest (43-yo) sitting next to me was a cutie. I try not to check her out as much and instead listen to all the speeches before the dinner. We start eating and she starts a conversation with me.
Starts flirting and likes my chase frame
At this time I wasn't sure if she was flirting with me or just being nice. I had a couple of older women before and love them for their intellect and for being more sexually adventurous. Many of them are however either married or have a lot of reservations when it comes to flirting with younger guys. But I was in this for the fun and to see what could happen (which I just realized is the best mindset to have anyways).
We start talking about her trips to different countries and some of the jobs she had through the years. She asks me a couple of questions about what I do and so on. I tell her, but still not too much. But it wasn't that easy since it turns out she is a very good conversationalist.
Sexual tension can be too high
I move her out to take some fresh air. She does not follow at first so I go by myself and let her talk to her friend (she was still liking it, but also reserved when I tried to move forward). She eventually follows and I see this as an opportunity to escalate further. I build up tension and keep on building and then a still moment between us. I look at her eyes and even triangulate, only for her to break the tension.
Another lesson about tension: it is better if you break it than her doing it. Now she was leading the dance a little more.
As we get inside another concert starts. And she ignores me when it ends (almost flipped out, but I was going for sprezzatura here). I started conversations with other people. Not trying to look her way. I even thought I lost her so I sat at a couch nearby minding my own business.
She the squeezes my hand back. I could feel that we had a sexual connection. She starts mingling with the other guests again and wile I was eating, even more, food (buffet). I was very tired and a part of me was screaming to get home, but now that I was flirting heavy with this woman I just have to hang in there just "to find out" what could happen.
Logistics and last minute resistance
Then the host wants me on stage to sing a ballad I composed last year. I usually lose girls after singing. Don't know why, but it feels like I get too unattainable after performing (I've been singing for 22 years now). I usually don't make a big deal out of my singing, but people (especially girls) make it more than it is. So singing is something I don't show until the girl knows me very well. But this is another topic I want to explore further in another post.
After singing my song I get off. And this woman starts looking my way a lot. I try to ignore her and not look too eager. I send her a text.
Me:So would you like to walk after the party. We can go downtown together (sincer her train was in the city centre).
Her: Yes, we could do that
The bar starts to close and I move out, waiting for her to follow me. As I look through the windows from the outside I can see her slowly putting on her jackets. She comes outside and starts talking to a dude that had a conversation with me. I tried to end it gracefully and we started walking with her and her friend.
One little note about friends of girls that I am about to seduce. Chase pointed out in an article that when they see some connection they usually let us be alone. In this case, it was very clear from early on, even after getting interrupted a couple of times throughout the whole interaction.
She starts playing with my height (170cm) and still giving me some heat (playfully) for my youth. I say "hey it's all about new adventures". She starts smiling and again squeezes my hand. We start going to my street and I ask her if she wants to see my cat (the best line ever).
I lead her to the bedroom and start kissing her. She gives me resistance. And then I remember reading a post in this forum about getting naked yourself before taking her clothes off. I do this, but instead of doing it myself I ask her to do it for me while touching my whole body at the same time. It worked and we made love the whole night. 6 times or so.
Final thoughts
The morning after I follow her to the train station. And spend some time asking about her impression of me. She tells me she was apprehensive about going to bed with me, but changed her mind when I said "who cares about age?". She tells me she hasn't had any (sex) for more than a year and saw this as an opportinity to "try something new" (a guy younger and smaller). She also loved my intellect and the fact that I was being so forward with her.
And another thing, noone saw us leaving the place (other than her friend). Keeping it down low is key.
I also saw other girls looking my way when I was at the concert. I mostly ignored these signs other than using them as proof of pre-selection (mingling a bit, but not moving them along). I have made some mistakes in this department. Flirting with women and enjoying the attention can make some girls auto-reject (I know I would do the same if a woman I was flirting with, suddenly starts doing the same with other guys).
Things I could do better:
Sometimes sexual tension gets too high. I need to try using humor from time to time.
Handling interruptions could be smoother.
Better control of my own emotions (this is not a big issue in cold approach pick-up), but moreso in the latter stages of seduction.
Things I am getting good at
Leading.
Being able to recognize when I am out of control (emotionally).
Discretion in seduction is key (an eye opener).
Handling objections.
Handling last minute resistance.
Taking care of her emotions.
