Ok so me, 25, her 24, neither did have a long term partner before. She hasn't had sex before and is timid, me- just a one night stand, usually not nervous in intimate situations with girls, but too invested in them after a while.
PROBLEM: matching characters, but poor sex on first date, is there a way out from this horrible position?
We knew each other for like a year but started talking two months ago. I could tell she was into me, so we started texting and after a while talked like good old friends- plus there was mutual attraction. We got an occasion to meet up at hers a few days ago, actually our first night out. She was even more into me than I was into her. I get some attention from girls, although she's above my league, so I didn't want to lose her (yeah, wrong mindset I know). Much alcohol, we got to bed, but I knew I'd be nervous fucking her good to show I'm capable, plus I wasn't really horny lately due to inactivity. No resistance at all, that's probably because of long foreplay, she was highly aroused and came once during that phase. When it came to the right moment, as I said I could barely get it up- then we did a round which she RATHER enjoyed, but then I tried a second one but I was done, I told her it seems I'm nervous around her. She was ok though at that point.
I slept over, she still was into me apparently, but then I thought I needed to improve myself in her eyes and try once more. Again no resistance, but again due to the pressure, getting into my head and inexperience I couldn't get it done properly... I could stop here but ok, let me finish (no pun intended). Initially all ok and cuddling, then she started cooling off, we talked about life in general, but I didn't address my undoing. I might have also indicated too much that I'm into her. When I was leaving she was already somewhat colder. I felt like shit obviously.
Two days after she said it was too quick, she's not looking for a relationship right now and blamed it on alcohol, obviously it was the most diplomatic thing she could say, and she was not really enthusiastic but responded to my messages fairly quickly.
Now that I read it I feel like a fckn idiot to even ask, but is there anything to be done here given that she was intially into me, we invested much time in each other? I'd say we're a good match (sadly except for the sex part...). I really like her, although I know it's like 99% irreparable. I only thought about talking it over in person & not over text, but then- what do I say or offer her? There is no way I'm taking her to bed now, and that's the only way this could be miraculously rectified, taking it slower is also not an option I believe. Obviously just texting her to turn things around when she's already cold = chasing. How do I get a chance to prove her wrong? She's inexperienced herself, so wouldn't she be a bit slower to write me off?
Just waiting for you to say to go out and meet other girls, but yeah, tough times now with going out so I wanted to give it one more go.
Thx
PROBLEM: matching characters, but poor sex on first date, is there a way out from this horrible position?
We knew each other for like a year but started talking two months ago. I could tell she was into me, so we started texting and after a while talked like good old friends- plus there was mutual attraction. We got an occasion to meet up at hers a few days ago, actually our first night out. She was even more into me than I was into her. I get some attention from girls, although she's above my league, so I didn't want to lose her (yeah, wrong mindset I know). Much alcohol, we got to bed, but I knew I'd be nervous fucking her good to show I'm capable, plus I wasn't really horny lately due to inactivity. No resistance at all, that's probably because of long foreplay, she was highly aroused and came once during that phase. When it came to the right moment, as I said I could barely get it up- then we did a round which she RATHER enjoyed, but then I tried a second one but I was done, I told her it seems I'm nervous around her. She was ok though at that point.
I slept over, she still was into me apparently, but then I thought I needed to improve myself in her eyes and try once more. Again no resistance, but again due to the pressure, getting into my head and inexperience I couldn't get it done properly... I could stop here but ok, let me finish (no pun intended). Initially all ok and cuddling, then she started cooling off, we talked about life in general, but I didn't address my undoing. I might have also indicated too much that I'm into her. When I was leaving she was already somewhat colder. I felt like shit obviously.
Two days after she said it was too quick, she's not looking for a relationship right now and blamed it on alcohol, obviously it was the most diplomatic thing she could say, and she was not really enthusiastic but responded to my messages fairly quickly.
Now that I read it I feel like a fckn idiot to even ask, but is there anything to be done here given that she was intially into me, we invested much time in each other? I'd say we're a good match (sadly except for the sex part...). I really like her, although I know it's like 99% irreparable. I only thought about talking it over in person & not over text, but then- what do I say or offer her? There is no way I'm taking her to bed now, and that's the only way this could be miraculously rectified, taking it slower is also not an option I believe. Obviously just texting her to turn things around when she's already cold = chasing. How do I get a chance to prove her wrong? She's inexperienced herself, so wouldn't she be a bit slower to write me off?
Just waiting for you to say to go out and meet other girls, but yeah, tough times now with going out so I wanted to give it one more go.
Thx