FR A creep interjects a chic I was talking to in the cafe

[Gladiator]

I was sitting in Starbucks and this HB is sitting two seats away from me. It was not strategic to go talk to her. So, I went and grabbed a coffee and came back and sat down next to her..

I noticed a creepy shabby looking Asian guy wearing thick glasses talking to himself and working on his laptop.. I thought he must be mentally challenged or something..

Anyway.. after around 5 mins, I tried to chat up the chic whom I sat next to.. I make a short remark about the book she was reading. I cold-read her where she was from etc and she was polite but doesn't give me much.. so went back to reading what I was reading on the phone..

After a couple of mins, this Asian dude that I mentioned earlier comes over and starts blabbering things at her.. like: "We come to Starbucks to meet educated people.. blah blah blah".. all along laughing creepily and bowed down like Asians do saying "thank you" and went back and sat. She was a bit shocked I guess since she wasn't expecting that.

I glanced at him while he was talking to the chic and didn't look at her since I guessed she was already creeped out and didn't want to make her uncomfortable. I put my head down and went back to what I was reading. After he left, she glanced at me that I noticed from my peripheral vision but didn't look at her. After a couple of mins, she left. I think she freaked out from what he did.

In the moment I thought what I did was fine, since she had already rejected me and there was nothing I was required to do but in hindsight, I probably misjudged his appearance for a homeless or mentally challenged guy and maybe I was wrong? I thought I should've looked at her with a "what the fuck was that?" look and probably should've had a couple of mins chat to her.

I wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do since she had already rejected me but I'm thinking since I go there often, he may do that again. Also, maybe subconsciously I still recovering from the rejection. He basically whiteknighted when he saw me chatting her up and it kind of made the environment tense since everyone were looking at her. I felt sorry for her but could I have done anything?

Any thoughts?

 

[Jan]

First of all, she didn't reject you. You simply didn't hook her.

Read this: especially "False Politeness and Ejecting' section.

Why You Eject from Talking to Girls Too Soon (Plus How to Stop)

A lot of guys bail out of their interactions with women too soon. How do you stop ejecting from women, and start winning with them? The worst thing to come out of most guys' mouths when dealing with women is: "Well, it was nice to meet you." This is the classic bail out ejection line of the...

www.girlschase.com

She actually gave you a great opportunity to connect when she looked at you after this dude left. Yes, you should have looked at her with 'What the fuck was that?" expression. You could also add: "That was kind of creepy, did you feel the same?". You would make her more secure, show emotional intelligence and connect emotionally (bad experiences connect equally well, if you were on the same side of the experience).

Instead, she looked at you, she knew you heard/saw this whole situation and did nothing apart from pretending that you didn't see it.

Initially she was neutral towards you. Then this dude creeped her out and you kind of creeped her out little too by not emphasising with her.

Finally, she was probably creeped out by both of you - by him in major way, by you in a minor way. That's why she left the cafe.

 

[Gladiator]

Initially she was neutral towards you.

Ya I didn't capitalize on the situation which was in my favor when she looked at me.. and could've turned it around. Oh well..

BTW that article was good, had some gold nuggets..