A must read post for guys struggling to get particular types of women.

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Thanks to some links on this forum, I started looking at a blog recently and a post that just went up is a masterpiece which is so timely given the discussions going on here lately. As someone that recently got moved into a hybrid sales role, I realized I started to sell more and have more success with my target market once it became more about their pain points instead of me wanting to hit a number. Without further delay, here is the post below:

The most important rule of the game you’ll ever learn: It’s not about you.

Throughout the years you’ve probably heard about a whole bunch of theories, gimmicks, pickup lines, and laundry list of things you can use to get a woman. You have been told that there is a &…

millennialbachelor.com

It's not about you.

In the pinned thread, @Chase did a good job hinting at it but this kind of deep dives into what he touched lightly on.

We always come in looking for that secret recipe, pickup line, or answer to picking up women and certain kinds of women at that. It's like women are an object standing still and we just have to workout the correct set of lines, tactics, and maybe even lifestyle choices to get her attention. We never really think deeply into what gets her out of bed in the morning or for those of us with a type, what gets those kinds of women out of bed in the morning. If we really thought about it that way and could actually relate with their motives and their drivers, we would have much more success instead of experiencing endless frustration and getting bitter. We don't do that though, it's about changing into an appearance or changing a tactic without really relating to how she feels and what gets her to take action. We cannot seem to relate to how we would feel if we were in that situation ourselves, there might be overlap there in emotions!

I'll break down two of the most commonly desired women by guys and try to apply this method.

"I can't get blonde bombshells"

For one, this is mandatory reading for any guy who has a thing for the type:

How to Have Sex with Blonde Bombshells

There’s an undeniable allure to the blonde bombshell. Hers is a unique spot in the Western pantheon – with her own sexual iconography, even; one that makes her tremendously desirable to a large segment of the male population. And if you want a gal like her, you may find yourself hitting the same...

www.girlschase.com

I will kind of let that be the mic drop as Chase did a great job on it but to expand on that just a bit, relate to your own emotions. You are not above trying to fit in and seek validation yourself, it might be with a different group of people but that urge is still there. If someone made you look good to others, you'd want them in your life more. If someone embarrassed you or made you look bad, you'd want them out.

"I can't get hot ethnic girls in the west because they only want white guys."

A more recent one I hear, hot girls who happen to be Latina, Asian, or Arab but more western in demeanor are my type, I love them, but they only want white guys. Let's break this down.

Your typical ethnic chick out west is likely trying to fit into mainstream society, does not want to miss out on the fun she sees her more free white friends having, does not want to let her youth get away from her, and wants to be validated like the hot blonde is (social media, exclusive events, etc.).

It just so happens that the socially mobile well-connected white guy gets her a lot more options than some stereotypically dorky ethnic guy who is under the thumbs of his parents.

Imagine a situation where you may have felt restrained, repressed, and wanted to enjoy the same fun you saw others having but could not. How would you have treated someone who gave you the gateway to having that fun versus someone who kept you restrained?

Unfortunately, most ethnic dudes are overbearing and come from judgmental overbearing cultures that do not allow for fun, freedom, and enjoying life. Rather, academic success and excessive judgment are the norm. Imagine if you were at the end of that and found someone who freed you from that hell and stuck up for you when others were judging you harshly for wanting to have fun. You would probably pay that person a lot of respect and a lot of your time.

It's not about you.

 

[DarkKnight]

"Stereotypically dorky ethnic guy".

Seriously guys stop putting white guys on some kind of pedestal. This is getting really annoying. All you people are on apps or something. In REAL LIFE there are plenty of cool ethnic or foreign guys who get white guys furious because they get with "their" girls.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

In terms of content, a lot of what was said was actually pretty good in that post and on point. I have recently been victim to being too selfish and then falling into a bitterness circle towards a certain demographic but once you really think about it, most people end up kind of making sense. Everyone out there has a story and reason behind their biases, prejudice, and why they do what they do. As much as some of us might claim that we are not like that, we have the same issues ourselves or reasons we hold the opinions we hold.

All too often with game, we get taught that women are different creatures who function and hold different beliefs than us which is somewhat true but at the core, they are human beings too.

I think for getting certain kinds of girls, it is key to really understand why they feel the way they feel, why do they value what they value?

Chase made a great point about the blonde bombshell really wanting to "fit in". Once I was able to tap into my own need to fit in myself, I was able to see how I would be a bit harsh or unwelcoming to anyone who was hurting that as well as how much I would do for people that would help that.

Similarly now as I face some struggles with ethnic women and white women who are whitewashed/born in the states, I kind of think back to my youth when I hated my own culture because I was trying to fit in.

Empathy is one powerful tool to have, it's something I feel like the greatest leaders, seducers, and influencers in the world have which helps them connect with the masses on a deep level.