Advice for not chasing after becoming lovers

[ChalupaBatman]

I have been seeing this girl for a little under 2 months. Everything went pretty much by the book and we became lovers. I would say we see each other about twice a week. Recently I've noticed she isn't as quick to respond to my texts. It should be noted that I do not have a great abundance mentality. I should have listened and not fallen head over heels for this girl but I guess we have to live and learn. Its especially hard when this is the highest value girl that I've ever dated. Are there any articles on this subject for not chasing after already becoming lovers? Just looking at what my options are...and obviously I need to go out and meet more girls and work on my abundance mentality.

Just also want to add that my aim is (or I guess now was) to have a relationship with this girl and not have it be just casual. I've been there and done that and now want to gain some relationship experience.

Thanks for the help everyone!

 

[Franco]

CB,

The easiest way to imagine what you should do to keep an abundance mentality with a girl that you want to keep around is to imagine what a guy with abundance mentality would do if he was seeing her.

So, imagine if this was just a girl you KNEW you didn't want to have a serious relationship with, but she just happened to be one of the 5 girls in your rotation of women you're currently sleeping with. What you would do in this situation? Well, you'd probably hit her up early in the week to see if she's free to come over. If she accepts, you quickly set up the details (when and your place or her place) and not contact her again until that day. If she declines saying that she's busy with XYZ, then you reply with "no problem! Don't overwork yourself " and then you don't contact her again until next week because you're about to text the second girl in your rotation of 5 girls to see if SHE'S down to come over.

In other words, the way you communicate abundance mentality to a girl is by making her believe that you're seeing other women by not caring one way or another whether or not she's available to see you. And when she's not, you simply don't contact her again until next week because you have other girls that WILL be available to come over. By not contacting her, she takes the rest of the week to wonder why you aren't still chasing her with random text messages. As a result, if she sees you as a very sexy man, she'll assume that you have other women that will come over at your beckoning call. This will vastly increase her curiosity and attraction toward you.

So if you found yourself texting this girl often without the purpose of meeting up (and just for chitchat), then you probably communicated to her that you aren't seeing other girls at the moment. This shows her you have a lack of abundance mentality.

And as a side note, the sex itself needs to be superb to guarantee her chances of coming back. So if she feels like she can get better sex elsewhere, then her emotions won't be nearly as strong toward you.

Hope that helps. =)

- Franco

 

[IrishConrad]

Solid Advice again Franco.

The key is getting to 5 girls in your rotation. That is going to take you going out and meeting tons of girls who will flake, not text you back at all, and flat out reject you.

You need to be comfortable in that arena. I'm at a point where I am just getting comfortable with it. I no longer care if she flakes. I then know I have to ask the cute barista, girl at the gym, etc out the next day.

Soon you'll have 2-3 girls interested, then 3-4....then 1 or two of those will fall off...so you keep approaching. 5 seems to be the magic number! Go for it knowing that you will indeed get rejected and turned down on dates. In no time that girl you want to be lovers with will have all her highly tuned senses feeling that your a man of high sexual market value.