FR AI into Approach into another AI?

[Regal Tiger]

So I noticed a woman across the room in the corner looked at me a few times in a coffee shop. Since there is lots of artwork around I decided to use that as my indirect approach. By just looking at stuff where I was seated, casually moving over to her.

Then when I got to her (a few feet away) saying that I didn't mean to crowd her while I was looking at the artwork. She said it was okay, then I repeated something that I said just before a little further away that I don't think she recognized was aimed at her: "Never sure how people evaluate their prices on their work. For example some of the stuff that I think is better is actually cheaper".

She mentioned labor prices and all that. But she seemed a little uncomfortable with my approach. Before letting go I decided to ask her a direct question; so I'm curious, what are you working on today?

She seemed to close up a bit more and just said school stuff. I just nodded and let it go concluding that she wasn't actually interested. No big deal.



But then as she's leaving, she stops to 'look at the books' on the shelf. She stayed there for a solid 4 seconds but didn't seem to look at anything other than a single spot on the wall, honestly. I saw this as an approach invitation but didn't want to get up and approach her again, honestly. She seemed so uncomfortable with the first one.

Now, there is another guy in here and he's closer to the bookshelf than I am. And he's with a girl, probably a girlfriend but I'm not sure. But they got here after me and I've not seen her checking him out at all.



Sooooooo yeah... not sure about that one.

Since typing this out what I'm assuming is this: I caught the approach invitations but they weren't meant for me? Even though the first time I caught her looking at me several times (although, to be fair, this could have been a natural response for me looking at her a few times trying to catch eye contact. But at this point I can't remember who started it, probably me but I wanna say it was her).

Not sure if it's relevant but she also has resting bitch face. And she kinda seemed sad to me before leaving cuz I got to thinking about the differences in resting faces. Hers seemed sad whereas the girl in front of me looks more neutral, even borderline happy. Then there's mine which I try to keep a slight mischievous smirk at all times when I'm thinking about approaching.

Anywhoo, thought I'd put this in here since I'm a day game noob. Wondering if ya'll have any thoughts?

 

[ulrich]

As I’ve been getting more experienced (as I am sure you are @Regal Tiger) I have been noticing more and more the times where girls shoot themselves on the foot and blow their own chances.

I think this is one of those.
She liked you, she AI’d but didn’t know how to respond… minutes later she is angry at herself and tries something bolder… but you didn’t pick up.
She probably let frustrated with herself.

It’s fun… when I was a newbie, I used to believe all women were masters at social and dating skills.
Nowadays I often have to stop them from blowing their own chances.

When I was dating my main, a couple of times she said “I don’t think I’m good enough for you, you should date a girl who is more mature/social/party-goer”… I had to stop her from auto-rejecting and blowing her own chances with me.

 

[Regal Tiger]

As I’ve been getting more experienced (as I am sure you are @Regal Tiger) I have been noticing more and more the times where girls shoot themselves on the foot and blow their own chances.

I think this is one of those.
She liked you, she AI’d but didn’t know how to respond… minutes later she is angry at herself and tries something bolder… but you didn’t pick up.
She probably let frustrated with herself.

It’s fun… when I was a newbie, I used to believe all women were masters at social and dating skills.
Nowadays I often have to stop them from blowing their own chances.

When I was dating my main, a couple of times she said “I don’t think I’m good enough for you, you should date a girl who is more mature/social/party-goer”… I had to stop her from auto-rejecting and blowing her own chances with me.

Yeah, honestly I never even thought of that before one of the guys sent me a PM about exactly that.

After reading that, it makes total sense. I know that women aren't masters of social dynamics or anything, but part of me does kind of expect women who are interested to be 'ready' in a way, or at least receptive. Not the best thing to think, but that was one of my unconscious beliefs. For some dumb reason it never even occurred to me that they'd accidentally shoot me down if they were interested lol

 

[Reese]

in one of Chase's articles he wrote:

" Don’t deny a woman the opportunity to be with you simply because she doesn’t seem to be reacting the way you think a girl who’s interested should react. She might be shy, or not especially gregarious or flirtatious, or maybe she’s in her head that day, or maybe she’s behaving more conservatively because people who know her are around, or maybe she likes you a lot and is scared of messing it up if she acts too interested, or who knows what the reason is. Whatever it is, you don’t want to miss out on a cute gal who digs you simply because you were too busy looking for reactions to go get results."

 

[Derek da man]

Nowadays I often have to stop them from blowing their own chances.

This really resonates with me. I was out at Salsa dancing last night as I go most weeks and have been for several years so I know lots of people, most only on a weekly social basis although I've been on holiday with a few of them.

I had 3 occasions last night where girls were giving really clear AI's and even stood chatting to me, then went and blew their own chances and ejected themselves. I need to work on how to prevent them doing this or pulling situation back. I guess I need to recognise the situation earlier but that'll take me a while to think through more.

Because these girls are really good dancers, dress amazingly, all made up to look fabulous I automatically assume they are masters of the game and full of confidence but it became apaprent, from my conversations, that they are as frustrated with the dating game as we (men) are. Unknowingly they gave me insights into their lack of confidence, lack of self esteem, not being pretty enough, etc, etc. Trust me when I say these 3 girls are up with the best looking girls in the club.

It's a really good leaning point and I need to work really hard on my belief systems that they are as insecure as the rest of us.