Socializing Am I Overthinking This or Was It a Territory Social Challenge at the Gym?

[The Emerald Archer]

Haha it's curious to see the diversity of perspectives here: some guys think it was a definite violation and challenge, while some guys think I was being inconsiderate.

I think the response was fine and good.

I've always considered a towel or water bottle on a piece of equipment to mean 'occupied don't use', this is the normal etiquette that is stuck to in all the gyms I've ever been in. Everybody knows it's impolite to jump in on someone's place when they go off to take a drink or something. Many times I've either asked someone or been asked if we can alternate sharing the equipment, that's the way to do it and get to know other people at the same time.

Gyms are always a place where guys will try to psych eachother out a bit with body language and such, that's fine and normal, but jumping in on an obviously occupied spot is a little bit of an aggression. If there really was no other option, then it could be taken as a prompt like 'dude stop taking up all the space' but seems like it wasn't the case.

It was so clearly a violation the guy couldn't keep his buddies in his frame against one person.

Thanks for the feedback, Will! I agree on the gym etiquette, this is the way I see it as well.

And yeah, the fact that those younger guys couldn't stay in frame further tips the scale to it being an aggression and a violation.

Anyways, I'll be better prepared next time. I'm just glad that I responded in a way that didn't make me look like a pushover, even though there could've been more authority behind it. That's okay, I'll be better prepared next time.

@hey_lover

As a fellow gym goer and also having worked in one. Best etiquette is to let other people use the equipment you're using if you're also using another piece of equipment. This is doubly true when it's peak period and availability is limited.

Most people tend to stick to one equipment at a time in which case it's your prerogative to allow someone to share with you or not. However, when using two pieces of equipment, it's fair for someone else to use it when it's not being occupied. In the end, they had as much right to the bench as you did when you vacated and your water bottle is not an occupant.

If you left your water bottle and went for a toilet break and came back. You tell them you're still using it and they should concede. But don't make the mistake of thinking that they know what your intentions are. Countless time I see a bench and a water bottle. I'll look around and ask to see if someone is using it. If I don't hear in the affirmative then I will use the equipment. If someone turns up soon after then I will give way but I won't not use it just beause of the bottle.

If you left the bottle and I saw you using a different machine. Then I definitely will move it and use the equipment. Not in a confrontational way but one that shows we can both use it together.

I hear ya and I have no problem sharing equipment and even going a little out of my way to encourage someone to work in with me, just because I know how it feels when you have a certain workout planned and it ends up sideways because the equipment is occupied.

However, the reason I keep saying it was an aggression was that:

• It wasn't peak time. It was just me and them, plus maybe one other person in that whole half of the gym. Most other members were either on the other side of the gym (which has conjoining doors like a hotel room) or in the powerlifting room which is another small room off the main gym floor.
• I was not holding them up and preventing them from doing their exercises. They literally had another adjustable bench they were already using, yet felt the need to occupy 2 benches; one for curls, and the other for bodyweight triceps extensions...
• They were working next to me the whole time, so there was no confusion about whether or not someone was or wasn't using it, even though a water bottle was there.
• The chest-supported row was 5 paces behind the bench/dumbbell area. They were close enough together that it would be understandable to use both. It wasn't like I was walking across the gym, they were literally right there. I choose exercises to alternate like that many times because of logistics to avoid looking that incodserate

Anyways, I've been sticking to one station at a time for most of my exercises now just to dissuade something like this from happening again and to avoid "rules for thee but not for me"

Think Gunwitch told me don’t assume malice where stupidity fits the mold.

Haha, good advice!

Anyways, I think I got this covered from here on out. I'm glad I started this thread because I feel so much more confident now and kinda want something like this to happen again just to get an opportunity to test out some responses/ideas that were suggested in this thread.

Thanks again, guys!

 

[Terms]

Anyways, I've been sticking to one station at a time for most of my exercises now just to dissuade something like this from happening again and to avoid "rules for thee but not for me"

I was more thinking the opposite. Do whatever suits you best, but be aware that in doing so you risk losing a piece of equipment, or having to share it, or having to wait an extra minute for someone else to finish. Which is no big deal, worth the risk, and will work to your advantage many more times than not unless its during busy hours.