FR Another day in the field (day game)

[alexlaguma]

So a couple weeks back I posted my first field report from going out and doing day game in London. I had a decent first two days, got a few numbers, and felt good social momentum. Then work got in the way, and I had a stag do abroad, so I haven't really been able to get in the field much.

Fortunately this weekend I've got pretty much all free, so i'm planning to do 15 approaches (5 a day) to build the positive social momentum. And then hopefully carry that into the week at work. I really want to start trying to do 1 or 2 approaches at my lunch break at work if possible.

So today - I wanted to get my five approaches in and I succeeded, but I feel the day could have been a bit better.

I started by going to a parkrun. I love my running, and the one near me is FULL of hot women. I got there early, and noticed a girl who was super hot and on her own. But I kinda felt a bit awkward approaching at the time, I don't know why. The run was beginning so I decided to just focus on that. I smashed my run, got a really quick time, and then finished and got my phone out. I saw her finish (didn't expect to see her) so now I thought I've got to approach. I had endorphins running through me from the run. I walked over, smiled and said "how did that go?" and she said "what, you mean the run?" and I was like "yeh I'm only messing I just thought you were hot so wanted to say hello" and she smiled and loved it. I number closed and got out of there. She was super hot so i'm happy with that one.

Approach #2 - I kind of tried the same thing, like 5 mins later, but it the girl was walking past me in almost like a bottleneck part of the park. She smiled, laughed but didn't stop and just carried on walking.

Approach #3 - I'm walking down the street and see this really hot blonde walking towards me. I'm thinking I've gotta approach here. I delivered probably the worst approach of my life lol. As I reached out my hand to stop her I accidentally spilled my coffee all over my hand. She stopped and asked if I was alright. I kind of froze a bit, and to make it worse there was some manual workers drilling right next to us, so she couldn't hear what I was saying. Eventually I managed to deliver my standard direct line, and she was flattered but was just like I've got a bf and walked off. I found the whole thing quite funny tbh.

Approach #4 - I came out of the tube station, saw a girl getting off at the same time and decided i was gunna approach. Came up beside her and said "excuse me, do you know where zara is?" and she was like "oh yeh its just up ..." and I interupted her and said "nah i'm only joking i know where it is, i just thought you were hot and wanted to say hello" she laughed and kind of rolled her eyes, i said are you single, she said no sorry and carried on walking away. It didn't work but I actually think I delivered it pretty smoothly, it would have worked well if the girl was a bit more open

Approach #5 - waited for a girl to came out of a coffee shop, reached out to stop her and she literally just gave the hand and said sorry I'm too busy and carried on walking LOL.

Positives about the day -

- I did my approaches. Always good to get the numbers in
- I had some success, got one number
- I have found a great spot to do approaches. the second spot I went to had so many girls it was unreal

Negatives -

I pussied out on a few approaches, particularly in the latter half of the day after approach 5. I could've continued and done a few more, but I got it in my head that I was under-dressed for where I was, and I was starting to feel tired.
I messed up the delivery a couple of times, oh well

Areas for improvement -
I need to remember to smile and have a laugh with it.

Anyway - if I do 5 more the next few days I'm sure I'll end up with a few numbers. Just need to start converting these to dates. From my last outing I got 3 numbers, and because I was away last weekend I struggled to convert any of them into dates. I need to reopen the convo's with 2 of them now ... hopefully that will work

 

[Chase]

@alexlaguma,

Impressive that you went from "first day game field report" a few weeks earlier to "go out on the weekend solo and make five ballsy super direct day game approaches." Man, it took me years to get ballsy enough to do a bunch of day game approaches in a row. You're barreling out of the gates!

I started by going to a parkrun. I love my running, and the one near me is FULL of hot women. I got there early, and noticed a girl who was super hot and on her own. But I kinda felt a bit awkward approaching at the time, I don't know why. The run was beginning so I decided to just focus on that. I smashed my run, got a really quick time, and then finished and got my phone out. I saw her finish (didn't expect to see her) so now I thought I've got to approach. I had endorphins running through me from the run. I walked over, smiled and said "how did that go?" and she said "what, you mean the run?" and I was like "yeh I'm only messing I just thought you were hot so wanted to say hello" and she smiled and loved it. I number closed and got out of there. She was super hot so i'm happy with that one.

This was the best approach of the lot, for a couple of reasons:

• You were super jazzed about the girl (saw her once, didn't approach... saw her again: "Whoa, must be fate!")
• She was super hot, which made the "I thought you were hot" opener sincere and congruent
• All those endorphins from the run didn't hurt either

I normally dislike opening with anything like "I thought you were hot" (I know Hector likes that one though... maybe you got from him!), but in this case, because it was so congruent, and so sincere, it worked!

Approach #2 - I kind of tried the same thing, like 5 mins later, but it the girl was walking past me in almost like a bottleneck part of the park. She smiled, laughed but didn't stop and just carried on walking.

You don't say here, but if I had to guess:

• She probably was hot, but you probably didn't have the same kind of "whoa... goddamn... man, it must be fate!" feeling toward her
• You were probably running on something akin to "It worked on the last girl, so it should work on this one too"
• When you delivered it, it felt a lot more like a LINE and not like a raw expression of your inner feelings

This is the snag with blatant generic direct openers: if they aren't SUPER congruent & sincere, they can very easily come across as "just a pick up line."

Approach #3 - I'm walking down the street and see this really hot blonde walking towards me. I'm thinking I've gotta approach here. I delivered probably the worst approach of my life lol. As I reached out my hand to stop her I accidentally spilled my coffee all over my hand. She stopped and asked if I was alright. I kind of froze a bit, and to make it worse there was some manual workers drilling right next to us, so she couldn't hear what I was saying. Eventually I managed to deliver my standard direct line, and she was flattered but was just like I've got a bf and walked off. I found the whole thing quite funny tbh.

Yeah, that's funny. I LOL'ed.

You'll have stuff like that. Goofy, awkward approaches.

They're good for laughs.

Thing I noticed: if the girl is really into you, much of the time she almost will not notice your goof (whatever it is) and just looks at you expectantly anticipating the approach.

The reverse is usually true too: if she notices the goof and comments on it, it's often (though not always) an uphill battle sucking her in. Sometimes though it'll turn into some funny banter though and you can hook her:

YOU: Hey I... [spills coffee] darn it.​

​

HER: OMG, are you okay?​

​

YOU: Oh yeah, I absorb coffee through my skin. The caffeine kick is so much faster than drinking it.​

​

HER: [laughter][bantering back]​

Approach #4 - I came out of the tube station, saw a girl getting off at the same time and decided i was gunna approach. Came up beside her and said "excuse me, do you know where zara is?" and she was like "oh yeh its just up ..." and I interupted her and said "nah i'm only joking i know where it is, i just thought you were hot and wanted to say hello" she laughed and kind of rolled her eyes, i said are you single, she said no sorry and carried on walking away. It didn't work but I actually think I delivered it pretty smoothly, it would have worked well if the girl was a bit more open

Approach #5 - waited for a girl to came out of a coffee shop, reached out to stop her and she literally just gave the hand and said sorry I'm too busy and carried on walking LOL.

Positives about the day -

- I did my approaches. Always good to get the numbers in
- I had some success, got one number
- I have found a great spot to do approaches. the second spot I went to had so many girls it was unreal

Negatives -

I pussied out on a few approaches, particularly in the latter half of the day after approach 5. I could've continued and done a few more, but I got it in my head that I was under-dressed for where I was, and I was starting to feel tired.
I messed up the delivery a couple of times, oh well

Areas for improvement -
I need to remember to smile and have a laugh with it.

Anyway - if I do 5 more the next few days I'm sure I'll end up with a few numbers. Just need to start converting these to dates. From my last outing I got 3 numbers, and because I was away last weekend I struggled to convert any of them into dates. I need to reopen the convo's with 2 of them now ... hopefully that will work

All right man!

I love your enthusiasm.

I think you would benefit from experimenting more with genuine direct openers.

i.e., where you are paying women sincere compliments to them about specific things about them you see and like:

How to Compliment a Girl Like You've Known Her for Years

In the article on causes and cures for a moody girlfriend, a reader asks about how to compliment a girl, saying: “Hi there Chase, Can you write an article about compliments to girls that [you] are interested in. Not just from that you approached cold but girls that you met through hobbies or...

www.girlschase.com

It makes it much easier for every approach to be congruent/sincere, because you are leading with an observation about something you find genuinely attractive and intriguing.

You can still use "I thought you were hot" when you are really just totally FLOORED with a girl and can convey it in a super sincere, yet non-needy way. Like you are admiring a painting or whatever: "That's a hot painting."

But I would play around with diversifying your opening a bit, to make it more tailored to the girl, that way you are able to deliver your openers in a far more genuine (Hector might call it 'raw') way.

Hope you keep the day game approaching up!

Best,
Chase

 

[alexlaguma]

@Chase

Thanks so much for replying - really appreciate the comments. Just to come back on a couple of your points -

This was the best approach of the lot, for a couple of reasons:

• You were super jazzed about the girl (saw her once, didn't approach... saw her again: "Whoa, must be fate!")
• She was super hot, which made the "I thought you were hot" opener sincere and congruent
• All those endorphins from the run didn't hurt either

I normally dislike opening with anything like "I thought you were hot" (I know Hector likes that one though... maybe you got from him!), but in this case, because it was so congruent, and so sincere, it worked!

Absolutely spot on. This actually converted into a Lay - I need to write up the report! My first lay since getting into Day Game. It's great because it showed me that this stuff is actually pretty easy to do, once you actually just do the approaches and stop thinking about it. It has given me a lot of confidence.

I think you would benefit from experimenting more with genuine direct openers.

i.e., where you are paying women sincere compliments to them about specific things about them you see and like:

You definitely have a point here. I guess when I chuck out the old line "I just thought you were really hot" it can seem like the type of thing I throw out there all the time (because it is, lol!). I will try to be more specific in my next set of approaches, and I'll go to reading this article now.

One thing I am REALLY keen to do is try your challenge of 4 approaches a day for a month. I find it actually quite difficult to get approaches in without carving out specific days to go and do it. I tend to split my time between home and the office, and neither seem to work with squeezing approaches in. I've been reading quite a few of @DoWhatWorks posts recently and I know he talks about trying to incorporate approaching into his normal life, and that is something I am also trying to do. Whether it means forcing myself to work from a coffee shop with good footfall during the day, or making myself actually get off the tube a stop earlier so I have a longer walk with more options around.

Either way I need to find a way of getting more approaches because what I am finding (and I know you have wrote a lot about this) is that SOCIAL MOMENTUM is the key to everything for me. Once I get on a roll with talking to people (and I don't mean just girls here) then I just feel more energetic, confident and the approaches just seem to happen for me.

Anyway - its good to be back on day game and happy I've had some recent success. I still have a bunch of numbers from recent outings that I need to convert into dates. Texting is an area I could definitely brush up on - I'll read some of your articles on it now. Cheers!