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anyone help on how to ask a girl you just met out but don't ruin the possibility

ESGSanders

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Feb 24, 2014
Messages
11
How can I ask a girl out that I have only just met, but who seemed intelligent and gorgeous and overall just a good person to know. I want to ideally start something with her (she is an HB10, intellectual, stunningly gorgeous model (she did 5/6 shows in london fashion week)). Basically she's the rare 'complete package'.

I'm not getting oneitis, far from it but I would basically want to get to know her better before acting upon any attraction or just being friends.

I don't want to ask her out and get an outright 'no' because she isn't interested in me sexually because I don't want to ruin a possible friendship.

Thanks a bunch!
 

Franco

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 14, 2012
Messages
3,637
Re: anyone help on how to ask a girl you just met out but don't ruin the possibi

ESGSanders,

I don't want to ask her out and get an outright 'no' because she isn't interested in me sexually because I don't want to ruin a possible friendship.

You're trying to have your cake and eat it too. You want to approach the situation with a shot at having her but also end up in the friend zone if it doesn't work out. That's not the way things work with women. You can only put your eggs in one basket.

If you want her as a friend, then you simply socialize in a friendly way with her and invite her to "friendly" outings (or social gatherings). This won't get you her, but it will get you into the friend zone (assuming that's where you want to be). Although, I'd have to advise against this since you've already placed her on a pedestal by labeling her an "HB10" (which she's likely not -- I've only labeled two women in my life an "HB10," and I purposely did it so that I would never have to view any other woman at that level). By labeling her an HB10, you've already lost your chance with her; you value her more highly than you do any other girl, and although you may not yet have one-itus, you will surely end up with it (or something close to it) if you decide to become friends and spend more time with her without seducing her.

I suggest you approach her directly, ask her for a date, and move things forward if she accepts. If she doesn't, it would be best to move on (unless she realistically provides some sort of other unique value to your career or something in some other way, but even then, it's risky).

- Franco
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

PinotNoir

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
747
Re: anyone help on how to ask a girl you just met out but don't ruin the possibi

I hate to be harsh, but I find these two statements contradictory:

(she is an HB10, intellectual, stunningly gorgeous model (she did 5/6 shows in london fashion week)). Basically she's the rare 'complete package'.

I'm not getting oneitis, far from it...

If you didn't put her on a pedestal, you would have talked with her casually and asked her out already, especially if she's the complete package.

Just remember that she's just a person like everyone else. From the outside looking in, it may look like she's "out of your league," but the outside contains a lot of masks. When you talk with her, don't treat her any more special than any other girl. I'm sure she has insecurity, vulnerabilities, and dreams/desires outside of fashion, just like everyone else.

Lastly, every guy's tastes are different. To you, she may be a HB10, but to another guy, she's may just be a HB7. This should put her in a different perspective for you.

I just know that.... if I saw my "HB10" in person that I wouldn't be hesitating 1 minute. I'd be talking with her and asking her on a date immediately.

Best of luck to you!
 
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