Asking Someone To Pull Strings?

[Hue]

Yo dudes. So much on here has to do with persuasion and using social skills to get things you're after / placing yourself in high opportunity situations.

Right now I'm emailing faculty trying to get into graduate school and have been given a window to bring up getting assistance into a program. I want to suggest/imply that the person could help me get in, but don't want to come off as needy, entitled, or that I'm using them.

The person is on the admission board for the program. I'm currently doing undergraduate research with them, and unless I get into this school's program won't be able to continue the research project with me as the lead researcher (and I'm basically the only one willing and qualified). I can honestly say that the project is very likely to fall apart and come to an end if I'm not there. So, I want to suggest that if I was let in to the program, our research could continue, improve, and innovate. There's utility for both of us. But just coming out and saying that would be silly.

So what you guys think? How does someone walk the tight rope when asking a person in power for a favor?


Hue

 

[Fuck This]

You already have a relationship with them. Remember the Ben Franklin Principle (Google it if you don't). Tell them frankly that you are interested and that you have applied or will apply. Ask them if they think you would be a good fit. Make it their idea, thus making them invest in you. Also if you don't have their support, you need to know it right away so you can investigate plans B and C.

 

[Mr.Rob]

If there is a way to talk in person rather than email (or even over the phone) I'd recommend it. I've gotten strings pulled in bureacratic settings that I did in person that I'd never have achieved by email only. Persuasion has a much higher percentage rate if you can get in front of the person and appeal to their emotions.

 

[Hue]

Fuck,

Remember the Ben Franklin Principle (Google it if you don't).

Wow. Motherfucker intuitively figured out the foot in the door persuasion technique - and that the commonly understood "technique", while having some merit (do favors for them, receive favors back) isn't actually the best methodology for obtaining favors. Smart ass dude. Still have his biography on my to-do list.

Tell them frankly that you are interested and that you have applied or will apply. Ask them if they think you would be a good fit. Make it their idea, thus making them invest in you.

Did the first part, but did not ask if I would make a good fit. If I can get an in person meeting before application review I will totally do this.

I also provided enough detail about why this project has a lot of potential to be innovated and improved down the road - hopefully they'll spend enough time thinking about it and connect the dots to consider me a good candidate.

Also if you don't have their support, you need to know it right away so you can investigate plans B and C.

Already have plans B - K in the build haha.


Robby Bobby,

If there is a way to talk in person rather than email (or even over the phone) I'd recommend it.

I've honestly got a better chance of seeing them in a faculty building and running after them than I do scheduling a meeting this late in the year. Last I tried I was met with "I don't think we need to meet about X" so it'd have to be a significant change or update in the project that can't be accomplished over email.

Persuasion has a much higher percentage rate if you can get in front of the person and appeal to their emotions.

Hundo P man. Pulled two letter of recommendations with people I've only sat down with 2-5 times with (and over a year ago) by waiting weeks for a sit-down and steering convo into the letter right after a high note. There's so much more of a presence and delivery of information when you're there and they've got more to assess in their judgement.


Thanks gents!

Hue

 

[Hue]

Bumping this with a similar question.



So I've been busting my ass to become a bartender. I'm a damn good server and I've voiced to my managers I want to work behind the bar. I'm done with school and this is 100% what I want to do at this stage in my life (before and continuing into graduate school).

One floor manager gave me a weak maybe, the other hiring manager gave me a "we're not hiring from inside, sorry".
So, I went to the general manager and told her that I want this job, that I've been busting my ass and think I'll be able to provide the value to this job, and that I understand it's not some romanticized fairy tale and how hard this job actually is. I finished with, "is [bar] going to be a place that I can accomplish this growth and goal?", to drop a seed that I'm looking elsewhere.

She told me that we can talk about it again in March when we're busy and that she understands that I'm serious about it, but there are many other people looking for the position. I finished with reiterating that I have some experience making cocktails from another place I worked and why I would make the best candidate of inside candidates (without talking down on my other coworkers).



Last week I was out and hit it off with a group of people I hadn't really met. They were eating out of my hand by the end of the night. I exchanged numbers with this dude after he said that they're opening up the 11th location of his bar RIGHT across the street from mine.

I eventually received a text about an open interview. I go in and barely have to sell myself at all during the interview, and voice that I want bartender training. He said that if I come on as a server and show that I have the chops and am as good as I communicate that I am, he'll train me as a bartender withing a month of me working there. With that, he told me to give it a couple days of thought because he won't take me on if I'm still working across the street. That's just bad business.

So now I have a tough decision to make.

I can leave the bar with a bunch of my friends and coworkers where I've grown quite a bit and continue to grow. I nearly have the guarantee of becoming a bartender or at the very least being trained to be one if I leave.

Or I can cross my fingers and continue to bust my ass in hopes that I get chosen as the new inside-trained bartender, which easily could have been the GM saying something to not get me to leave.




How do I negotiate a promotion guarantee from my current employer?

I feel like explicitly leveraging, "I've been offered a job where they said they'll take me on as a bartender. I love it here, but I have to pursue my goals. If I'm going to stay I need a guarantee that I'll be able to make that growth here under a very similar timeline", is somewhat distasteful. I'm not going to leave on bad terms.

I respect my bosses and love everyone I work with. The work environment where I currently am is awesome, the hours are great for the industry, and scheduling is very flexible. This new place I know nothing about, other that the fact that they've notoriously taken employees from my very bar in the past and that they're a successful business model (growing form 5 to 11 locations in the past decade). They also have a strong footing in the industry and have a good population of clientele, just like my bar. They're just a few years ahead of mine in terms of how their chain has grown. They opened with 15 people 5 years ago and 12 are still there, which is GREAT retainment in this industry.

Given that "a couple days" from this new place means today or tomorrow, I have to decide / communicate soon. I could really appreciate some help on this from someone with experience is negotiating promotions.


Hue

 

[Cacc]

I feel like explicitly leveraging, "I've been offered a job where they said they'll take me on as a bartender. I love it here, but I have to pursue my goals. If I'm going to stay I need a guarantee that I'll be able to make that growth here under a very similar timeline",

do it. people respect honesty. you can't always not step on someone's toes, that's ok.

 

[Fuck This]

+1

The Restaurant and bar business is very turbulent and few places have the ability to withstand the whims of the consumer and maintain adequate cash flow. You need to make yourself known as a good bartender among the nightlife crowd. Then you have the opportunity to "be stolen" so to speak. Many good bartenders bring a crowd withthem we they move to a new bar...Bar owners know that and recruit accordingly.