- Joined
- Jul 6, 2017
- Messages
- 20
Initial meet:
Our night starts at the beer expo. It’s me and two friends (Let's call them Jake and Sara). While there, we meet an older couple who I later discover are part of a larger group. We run into this group several times throughout the night, last time being at the end of the expo while they are waiting outside for a taxi. We share taxis and head to a club together. When we arrive, I spot one girl inside who catches my eye. We begin dancing with our new friends and doing shots, then they introduce us to a couple more people in their group. One of their friends is the girl I was checking out! She’s absolutely stunning, a 10 in my eyes. We exchange names and chit chat a little. She seems excited to meet me. I grab her and dance with her and we chat a little more. Turns out she is from the same part of town as myself(I was out of town this night). I dance with my female friend in front of her (trying to work preselection) and a little bit after, she comes up and starts dancing with me.
Her and her friends decide to leave just before closing time and I know it’s my last chance to get a number but I hesitate and she’s gone. About 10 minutes later, the place begins to close so we leave. We go outside and she is still waiting for a taxi. One of her guy friends is standing next to her. I approach her and say “I wanna see you again. Give me your number.” She doesn’t respond.
I say again, “Give me your number.”
Her: You want my number?
Me: Yeah.
Her: You’ll forget it.
Me: I have a good memory.
She’s not convinced so I give her my phone and she punches her number into it. I’m not sure if I should stay or go after getting the number so I kind of just linger there. Her guy friend starts talking to me. He asks where I’m from and what nightlife spots I like. I mention the first venue that comes to mind and he laughs. I guess he thinks that place is lame. My friends begin calling me at this point, so I say my goodbyes and leave. I text the icebreaker text when I get home about an hour later. I felt like my approach outside the club wasn’t very good, so I wasn’t expecting to hear back from her. Much to my joy and surprise, she texts back 14 hours later.
Me: Nice to meet you, [her name] – Tree
Her: The same just woke up lol
Me: Crazy haha what time did you get back?
Her: today at 1pm lol
I don’t want to get into a long text conversation, so I stop here. I text her the next day to propose a date and get her schedule. Two days later, we meet for our first date.
Date 1:
I text her an hour before to let her know I'll be leaving soon in case she plans to flake. She writes back a little later that she’s on her way. I arrive at the venue and I grab a seat in front of one of the firepits. I go to the bar and order a drink. I check my phone and see that she texted saying she’s there. I text back and say I’m outside on the patio. I see her approaching on the sidewalk and stand up. She sees me and I walk over to the gate to let her in. I open the back gate (which says emergency exit only, fortunately no alarm sounds) for her and we greet each other with a cheek kiss. She takes a seat next to me and small talk begins. She asks how I am. I ask how the rest of her weekend went and what she did. I ask her if she wants a drink. She says yes and I flag down a waitress who then comes and takes her order. She orders wine. I confess I know nothing about wine and she laughs and says it's okay. She then proceeds to educate me a little on the subject. The venue we're at is the only place in town I know of that serves absinthe. She's never tried it so I educate my lovely date about this particular liquor and she agrees to do a shot with me. Unfortunately, the waitress informs me that they are out of it at the time and asks if I wanna order shots of something else. I say no thanks and she leaves.
She shows me some of her pictures on her phone and I ask “so where’s all the pictures of you in a bikini? That’s what I wanna see.” She shows me a picture of her in a bikini in Cancun. We discuss travel and she tells me some of her favorite vacation spots. She asks what I do and I say I'm unemployed. She works at FedEx and I disclose that I worked there for a couple of years. I ask her what she does for fun. She says going out, drinking, traveling, and hiking but says she's hasn't gone hiking for a while. I ask more about the hiking subject but I don't find out much other than the trails that she's been to. In between all of this, I tell a story about how I got hit on by another man at my last job. I'm not sure if it's a good idea to use a story like this. I tell her that he put his hand on my shoulder, while I do the same to her, and said I had pretty eyes. She laughs and says "That's so uncomfortable!" Later on, I tell another story while sneaking in some more touching.
The fire pit in front of use isn't lit so I ask the waitress how to turn it on and she informs me that it's not currently working. I see fire on the other side of the patio and I stand to see if there are any open seats. The waitress sees me, asks if we want to move, and points to an open bench. I move that direction and my date follows (I probably should have held her hand while I lead her). I'm sitting facing the fire and she is turned facing me. She's close enough that her knees are touching my leg. We make some more small talk and I notice her legs are restless. I begin running out of things to say and I'm starting to think it is time to make a move. On the few other dates I have been on, I've never tried to escalate so I'm feeling hesitant about doing so now. I bring up a couple of topics discussed earlier, I'm just treading water at this point. It's quiet for a moment while I keep thinking I need to escalate, until finally I make my move.
My plan is to go to the Walmart across the street and get a bottle of Vodka and meet her at the hotel that is right next door to the bar we're at so we can get a room. I don't try to go to my place because I live with my family and I inquired earlier about her living situation and she said she also lives with her parents(Or so she says). I also realize now the problem with this plan logistically. I should of had her drive me to the Walmart so we can both go in together and arrive at the hotel together. It probably would have been a bad idea to leave her alone.
So I ask if she wants to get a room and I'll get the bottle and meet her there. She says "If you want..." I ask if she wants to and she responds yes. Her only objection was that she brought her car and I tell her the hotel is walking distance. We get up to leave and go to the bar so she can pay for her drink. While there, I notice she is texting someone named Raul. After she pays, she says she's going to use the bathroom real quick. I decide to wait at the bar where we're standing. A couple minutes go by and she doesn't return. Then a few more minutes go by. I begin to worry. I'm sitting at the bar looking at my phone, it's been somewhere between 5-10 minutes. Finally, I see her walk out searching the area for me. I walk over to her, she smiles when she sees me, and we walk out together. Then, she hits me with it.
Her: I think I'm gonna go home.
Me: Are you sure?
Her: Yeah. I work tomorrow and I wanna be responsible.
My first thought after she says this is to ask her if she likes me and if she says yes to tell her I like her too and that if we leave now, we won't see each other again (I think Chase mentioned something like that in one of his articles). Instead, I try to logically appeal to her objection but it is fruitless (for example, I say things like "it's still early" blah, blah, blah). I ask one more time if she's sure and she says yes. I tell her I'll walk her back to her car, so I put my arm around hers and we walk to the parking lot. I decide I should at least kiss her before she leaves. She finds her car and I go for the kiss but she turns and I kiss her cheek. We say our goodbyes and I walk back to my car.
Date 2:
I text her two days later to arrange another meet for that night or the next day. She responds with "Sounds good I'm gonna be with a girlfriend you should invite someone so the 4 of us can hangout."
Me: Oh so you wanna double date?
Her: Sure why not lol
My instinct says this is a bad idea but I'm curious to give it a try and think to myself I may even hook my friend up. She suggests meeting there. I tell her we'll pick them up, she lives a block away from my friend coincidentally. My friend drives and we take his BMW M4, which I worry will make it look like I'm trying to be impressive. On the way there I'm feeling nervous and I psyche myself out over the car thing.
We arrive at her place, she meets me outside and we cheek kiss. She seems happy to see me again. She goes up to my friend who's sitting in the car and introduces herself to him. Her friend hasn't arrived yet and she goes back inside to retrieve something. She comes back outside and I'm sitting in the car with the door open facing outside while she is standing outside. I ask how her week's been etc. Her friend arrives and I make the mistake of asking my girl where she wants to sit. She shrugs and I mess up again by getting in the car first. Her friend sits next to me and my girl sits in the front, next to my friend. To make matters worse, I didn't ask my girl if her friend spoke English, I assumed she did. Her friend speaks no English and my friend knows no Spanish. This night is off to a great start.
On the ride there, I don't talk to my girl much. I figure I'll save it for the venue (we are going to a bar/restaurant that is right on the beach). I worry her friend may feel left out, so I talk to her while my girl talks to my friend (I know a little bit of Spanish). My girl leads us to the front desk and orders a table. I think "Oh shit. I should have done that." None of the outside seats are available so we grab a seat inside while we wait. After ordering and a bit of chatting, the girls leave to use the bathroom. While they're gone, my friend tells me I need to talk more. When they return, I start being more chatty with my girl. I ask what she would do if she could work any job and get paid the same she is now. She says she would drink. I infer she doesn't have any deep ambitions career-wise and is more of a party girl. To try to get some touch in, I tell her she has small hands and I have her touch my hand to compare. She removes her hand after a few seconds.
Our table outside is ready so we move out there. The seats give a great view of the beach. I touch her back and point out the waves on the ocean. Her and I start to connect really well at this point. I ask about her childhood and it turns out her and I had a similar upbringing and we're able to relate on several things. I ask where she would go if she could drop everything and go anywhere and she says Italy. I probe for more info and she discloses that she loves the culture and wants to learn Italian. She reciprocates to me and I talk about Spain and why I wanna go there. I don't notice but my friend tells me that during this time she moved closer to me. I've had a couple of drinks so eventually I leave to use the restroom. I come back and she is talking to her friend.
I don't ask these back-to-back but over the course of 10 minutes while we are talking. I tell her let's go walk on the beach and she says it's too cold. I tell her she can use my body to keep her warm. I tell her we should send our friends home and get a room, she says "hell no!" in a sarcastic tone. Last, I say we should head to her place and have a drink there. She says no cause her parents are home. More of my brilliant ideas. It was foolish of me to think anything would happen given the circumstances but I wanted to see what I could get away with. My friend says later that I seemed desperate but I thought it would be good to try to be persistent and not give up on the first "no."
Shortly after, the place begins to close so pay the check and leave. On the way out, I try to hold her hand but she moves away. While we are leaving, I notice she is texting. One time, I see her texting Raul again. I also see her write that she'll "arrive in 15 minutes" but I don't see who the message is to. I use the bathroom one last time and when I exit the valet has already brought the car back up. Everyone's in the car already, so I take the seat next to my friend and we leave.
She continues to text in the car and receives a couple of calls. She tells someone "10 minutes." It seems like they're gonna be having some company when they get back to her place. When we get to her place she mentions sarcastically that we should get in the pool.
Me: You have your bathing suit?
Her: No but I have my bra and panties. Just kidding, it's too cold.
It's the wrong time to say it but I use Chase's line "...or if you're feeling adventurous, we can get in naked." She says nothing. The car stops and I help them out of the back seat. She and I cheek kiss and I thank her for seeing me again and she says "Thanks for everything!" After we leave, my friend says I seemed nervous in the beginning and I was quiet at the end, but he says I did good in the middle of our outing. I started feeling depressed at the end when I realized my chances of getting with this girl now are slim-to-none, so I got quiet. Her texting and getting phone calls at the end were also bothering me since she said earlier she didn't have any plans that day. Only that her and her friend were gonna hang out at her place.
Final thoughts:
I wonder what went wrong when I tried to move us to the hotel because she was onboard initially. Maybe I didn't make her feel comfortable enough or maybe it was a matter of not overcoming her resistance. I also wonder if I should of asked who Raul was since she texted him at the end of both dates. I assume he's an orbiter or a close guy friend. During the second date, she asked about what Jake was doing that night. I say he's with his girlfriend. She comments that he was funny. I wonder if she was hoping I'd bring him. If you made it this far, thanks for reading. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
Our night starts at the beer expo. It’s me and two friends (Let's call them Jake and Sara). While there, we meet an older couple who I later discover are part of a larger group. We run into this group several times throughout the night, last time being at the end of the expo while they are waiting outside for a taxi. We share taxis and head to a club together. When we arrive, I spot one girl inside who catches my eye. We begin dancing with our new friends and doing shots, then they introduce us to a couple more people in their group. One of their friends is the girl I was checking out! She’s absolutely stunning, a 10 in my eyes. We exchange names and chit chat a little. She seems excited to meet me. I grab her and dance with her and we chat a little more. Turns out she is from the same part of town as myself(I was out of town this night). I dance with my female friend in front of her (trying to work preselection) and a little bit after, she comes up and starts dancing with me.
Her and her friends decide to leave just before closing time and I know it’s my last chance to get a number but I hesitate and she’s gone. About 10 minutes later, the place begins to close so we leave. We go outside and she is still waiting for a taxi. One of her guy friends is standing next to her. I approach her and say “I wanna see you again. Give me your number.” She doesn’t respond.
I say again, “Give me your number.”
Her: You want my number?
Me: Yeah.
Her: You’ll forget it.
Me: I have a good memory.
She’s not convinced so I give her my phone and she punches her number into it. I’m not sure if I should stay or go after getting the number so I kind of just linger there. Her guy friend starts talking to me. He asks where I’m from and what nightlife spots I like. I mention the first venue that comes to mind and he laughs. I guess he thinks that place is lame. My friends begin calling me at this point, so I say my goodbyes and leave. I text the icebreaker text when I get home about an hour later. I felt like my approach outside the club wasn’t very good, so I wasn’t expecting to hear back from her. Much to my joy and surprise, she texts back 14 hours later.
Me: Nice to meet you, [her name] – Tree
Her: The same just woke up lol
Me: Crazy haha what time did you get back?
Her: today at 1pm lol
I don’t want to get into a long text conversation, so I stop here. I text her the next day to propose a date and get her schedule. Two days later, we meet for our first date.
Date 1:
I text her an hour before to let her know I'll be leaving soon in case she plans to flake. She writes back a little later that she’s on her way. I arrive at the venue and I grab a seat in front of one of the firepits. I go to the bar and order a drink. I check my phone and see that she texted saying she’s there. I text back and say I’m outside on the patio. I see her approaching on the sidewalk and stand up. She sees me and I walk over to the gate to let her in. I open the back gate (which says emergency exit only, fortunately no alarm sounds) for her and we greet each other with a cheek kiss. She takes a seat next to me and small talk begins. She asks how I am. I ask how the rest of her weekend went and what she did. I ask her if she wants a drink. She says yes and I flag down a waitress who then comes and takes her order. She orders wine. I confess I know nothing about wine and she laughs and says it's okay. She then proceeds to educate me a little on the subject. The venue we're at is the only place in town I know of that serves absinthe. She's never tried it so I educate my lovely date about this particular liquor and she agrees to do a shot with me. Unfortunately, the waitress informs me that they are out of it at the time and asks if I wanna order shots of something else. I say no thanks and she leaves.
She shows me some of her pictures on her phone and I ask “so where’s all the pictures of you in a bikini? That’s what I wanna see.” She shows me a picture of her in a bikini in Cancun. We discuss travel and she tells me some of her favorite vacation spots. She asks what I do and I say I'm unemployed. She works at FedEx and I disclose that I worked there for a couple of years. I ask her what she does for fun. She says going out, drinking, traveling, and hiking but says she's hasn't gone hiking for a while. I ask more about the hiking subject but I don't find out much other than the trails that she's been to. In between all of this, I tell a story about how I got hit on by another man at my last job. I'm not sure if it's a good idea to use a story like this. I tell her that he put his hand on my shoulder, while I do the same to her, and said I had pretty eyes. She laughs and says "That's so uncomfortable!" Later on, I tell another story while sneaking in some more touching.
The fire pit in front of use isn't lit so I ask the waitress how to turn it on and she informs me that it's not currently working. I see fire on the other side of the patio and I stand to see if there are any open seats. The waitress sees me, asks if we want to move, and points to an open bench. I move that direction and my date follows (I probably should have held her hand while I lead her). I'm sitting facing the fire and she is turned facing me. She's close enough that her knees are touching my leg. We make some more small talk and I notice her legs are restless. I begin running out of things to say and I'm starting to think it is time to make a move. On the few other dates I have been on, I've never tried to escalate so I'm feeling hesitant about doing so now. I bring up a couple of topics discussed earlier, I'm just treading water at this point. It's quiet for a moment while I keep thinking I need to escalate, until finally I make my move.
My plan is to go to the Walmart across the street and get a bottle of Vodka and meet her at the hotel that is right next door to the bar we're at so we can get a room. I don't try to go to my place because I live with my family and I inquired earlier about her living situation and she said she also lives with her parents(Or so she says). I also realize now the problem with this plan logistically. I should of had her drive me to the Walmart so we can both go in together and arrive at the hotel together. It probably would have been a bad idea to leave her alone.
So I ask if she wants to get a room and I'll get the bottle and meet her there. She says "If you want..." I ask if she wants to and she responds yes. Her only objection was that she brought her car and I tell her the hotel is walking distance. We get up to leave and go to the bar so she can pay for her drink. While there, I notice she is texting someone named Raul. After she pays, she says she's going to use the bathroom real quick. I decide to wait at the bar where we're standing. A couple minutes go by and she doesn't return. Then a few more minutes go by. I begin to worry. I'm sitting at the bar looking at my phone, it's been somewhere between 5-10 minutes. Finally, I see her walk out searching the area for me. I walk over to her, she smiles when she sees me, and we walk out together. Then, she hits me with it.
Her: I think I'm gonna go home.
Me: Are you sure?
Her: Yeah. I work tomorrow and I wanna be responsible.
My first thought after she says this is to ask her if she likes me and if she says yes to tell her I like her too and that if we leave now, we won't see each other again (I think Chase mentioned something like that in one of his articles). Instead, I try to logically appeal to her objection but it is fruitless (for example, I say things like "it's still early" blah, blah, blah). I ask one more time if she's sure and she says yes. I tell her I'll walk her back to her car, so I put my arm around hers and we walk to the parking lot. I decide I should at least kiss her before she leaves. She finds her car and I go for the kiss but she turns and I kiss her cheek. We say our goodbyes and I walk back to my car.
Date 2:
I text her two days later to arrange another meet for that night or the next day. She responds with "Sounds good I'm gonna be with a girlfriend you should invite someone so the 4 of us can hangout."
Me: Oh so you wanna double date?
Her: Sure why not lol
My instinct says this is a bad idea but I'm curious to give it a try and think to myself I may even hook my friend up. She suggests meeting there. I tell her we'll pick them up, she lives a block away from my friend coincidentally. My friend drives and we take his BMW M4, which I worry will make it look like I'm trying to be impressive. On the way there I'm feeling nervous and I psyche myself out over the car thing.
We arrive at her place, she meets me outside and we cheek kiss. She seems happy to see me again. She goes up to my friend who's sitting in the car and introduces herself to him. Her friend hasn't arrived yet and she goes back inside to retrieve something. She comes back outside and I'm sitting in the car with the door open facing outside while she is standing outside. I ask how her week's been etc. Her friend arrives and I make the mistake of asking my girl where she wants to sit. She shrugs and I mess up again by getting in the car first. Her friend sits next to me and my girl sits in the front, next to my friend. To make matters worse, I didn't ask my girl if her friend spoke English, I assumed she did. Her friend speaks no English and my friend knows no Spanish. This night is off to a great start.
On the ride there, I don't talk to my girl much. I figure I'll save it for the venue (we are going to a bar/restaurant that is right on the beach). I worry her friend may feel left out, so I talk to her while my girl talks to my friend (I know a little bit of Spanish). My girl leads us to the front desk and orders a table. I think "Oh shit. I should have done that." None of the outside seats are available so we grab a seat inside while we wait. After ordering and a bit of chatting, the girls leave to use the bathroom. While they're gone, my friend tells me I need to talk more. When they return, I start being more chatty with my girl. I ask what she would do if she could work any job and get paid the same she is now. She says she would drink. I infer she doesn't have any deep ambitions career-wise and is more of a party girl. To try to get some touch in, I tell her she has small hands and I have her touch my hand to compare. She removes her hand after a few seconds.
Our table outside is ready so we move out there. The seats give a great view of the beach. I touch her back and point out the waves on the ocean. Her and I start to connect really well at this point. I ask about her childhood and it turns out her and I had a similar upbringing and we're able to relate on several things. I ask where she would go if she could drop everything and go anywhere and she says Italy. I probe for more info and she discloses that she loves the culture and wants to learn Italian. She reciprocates to me and I talk about Spain and why I wanna go there. I don't notice but my friend tells me that during this time she moved closer to me. I've had a couple of drinks so eventually I leave to use the restroom. I come back and she is talking to her friend.
I don't ask these back-to-back but over the course of 10 minutes while we are talking. I tell her let's go walk on the beach and she says it's too cold. I tell her she can use my body to keep her warm. I tell her we should send our friends home and get a room, she says "hell no!" in a sarcastic tone. Last, I say we should head to her place and have a drink there. She says no cause her parents are home. More of my brilliant ideas. It was foolish of me to think anything would happen given the circumstances but I wanted to see what I could get away with. My friend says later that I seemed desperate but I thought it would be good to try to be persistent and not give up on the first "no."
Shortly after, the place begins to close so pay the check and leave. On the way out, I try to hold her hand but she moves away. While we are leaving, I notice she is texting. One time, I see her texting Raul again. I also see her write that she'll "arrive in 15 minutes" but I don't see who the message is to. I use the bathroom one last time and when I exit the valet has already brought the car back up. Everyone's in the car already, so I take the seat next to my friend and we leave.
She continues to text in the car and receives a couple of calls. She tells someone "10 minutes." It seems like they're gonna be having some company when they get back to her place. When we get to her place she mentions sarcastically that we should get in the pool.
Me: You have your bathing suit?
Her: No but I have my bra and panties. Just kidding, it's too cold.
It's the wrong time to say it but I use Chase's line "...or if you're feeling adventurous, we can get in naked." She says nothing. The car stops and I help them out of the back seat. She and I cheek kiss and I thank her for seeing me again and she says "Thanks for everything!" After we leave, my friend says I seemed nervous in the beginning and I was quiet at the end, but he says I did good in the middle of our outing. I started feeling depressed at the end when I realized my chances of getting with this girl now are slim-to-none, so I got quiet. Her texting and getting phone calls at the end were also bothering me since she said earlier she didn't have any plans that day. Only that her and her friend were gonna hang out at her place.
Final thoughts:
I wonder what went wrong when I tried to move us to the hotel because she was onboard initially. Maybe I didn't make her feel comfortable enough or maybe it was a matter of not overcoming her resistance. I also wonder if I should of asked who Raul was since she texted him at the end of both dates. I assume he's an orbiter or a close guy friend. During the second date, she asked about what Jake was doing that night. I say he's with his girlfriend. She comments that he was funny. I wonder if she was hoping I'd bring him. If you made it this far, thanks for reading. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
