Hey, I'm one of the lucky guys that gets approached from time-to-time. Please don't get the impression that it happens every time I go out. It's probably 1 in 10 times maybe? Often enough that I don't always feel the need to take the women up on their offers anyway.
I've noticed that women are most likely to approach me when I'm really not in the mood for meeting people or when I'm on the verge of having a bad time - you know when a night seems to be going south... Anyway, some anecdotes to illustrate.
My last long term ex approached me at the end of a music festival while me and my friends were about to head off but I'd decided I wanted pancakes. Basically all the excitement had wound down, people were leaving and we were considering either going home or heading into town for more drinks. I was feeling very 'low energy' and wanted some nice comfort food to keep my mood up. Worth noting that I'm an introvert and the whole day of noise and socialising had left me very drained and really I just wanted to go home. Then out of nowhere I feel a tap on my arm and a very pretty young girl introduced herself to me. Don't remember what her opener was (weirdly I never remember what girls open me with...) but we ended up talking about the movie Labyrinth. Later in our relationship this girl had described me as looking 'super confident' when we met.
My most recent hook up came off the back of a girl who approached me in a nightclub. I'd travelled to a nearby city to see a band I'd wanted to see for a long time - actually they were a DJ/producer duo and I wanted to hear some of their stuff on a seriously loud sound system - it was awesome. Afterwards the group I was with wanted to go into town proper - so we went to a fairly well known indie-rock club. My mindset was that I'd achieved my goal for the night (i.e. see my band play) and since I was a bit overtired from work my plan was just to 'sit out' the night in the club and wait for my friends to be done so we can go home (introvert over socialising kicking in again).
I was finding the music tiresome and I broke away from my group and ended up wandering between the 3 rooms the club had, trying to find the least offensive music (though to be fair some of it was really good, just not consistently good so I felt the need to keep changing). But again my mood was pretty 'low energy' and I wasn't into the atmosphere at all.
The first girl that opened me said she assumed I was one of her friends' friend's when in fact we had no direct connection at all. She was nice and we chatted for a while. I met some of her friends too and chatted (including her boyfriend who shares my passion for piano so we had a really good conversation) - I was glad to be distracted from a night that was turning less fun by the minute. Sometime later I got approached again by a very pretty women who turned out to be a friend of the first girl and she'd assumed the first girl and me knew each other I guess because we were so at ease in each other's company and chatting away like old friends. I don't remember how the second girl opened me either but I do remember, during our interaction, her saying something to me that has stuck in mind because I can't really get my head round it, she said 'You're ridiculously beautiful, I'd be all over you if you weren't so old'. I didn't get anywhere with her that night though.
The third girl that opened me that night I don't really remember at all - I had quite a few people buying my gin and tonics all night, including all the girls that opened me so that was a bit of a haze.
The most recent time I've been opened I was with a male friend of mine. He'd invited me to the pub and I'd assumed that we'd be meeting mutual friends since me and this guy were acquaintances but not really close. When I got to the pub it was just me and him. I think maybe he invited others that didn't turn up. Anyway, turns out he'd had a tough week and wanted to talk about it and get a bit drunk. I was tired and low energy too so we had a proper man talk. In the middle of this we got hit on by a couple of women that neither of us found attractive - again don't remember how they opened us. It happened while a band was playing and they were stood in front of us, they turned round to open us. My guess is they saw us first, manoeuvred in front of us during the music, hoping that we'd tap them on the shoulder or something and open them but we didn't so they lost patience and opened us instead. Neither me or my friend could've shown less interest and we bailed on them twice but they kept following us. Hahaha I guess I know how it feels when a guy doesn't take the hint!
If there's anything you'd like more clarification on, fire away, it might help all of us get approached more if we can analyse what's happening here because moping around looking miserable in night clubs doesn't really seem like a good plan to me.
