Blatant hard push - hail mary

[luego]

So I have a LR gone bad, I've been pining over (viewtopic.php?f=5&t=8940). Decided to burn it to the ground. I'm posting this more as a curiousity - anyone think a blatant hard push like this had a chance as a hail mary? Sounds like I've misread her and she just wasn't interested in anything more than a one-off (which helps, as now I can move on mentally). But I'm experimenting with how much of a bluster/asshole/confident game I can run (yes, I'm in my jerk stage, overcompensating from decades of white-knighting). Calibrate me?

Me: You should come over for sex

Her: Say what?! lol no.

Me: Basically worked the first time
I have a whole bottle of kangaroo wine sitting here unopened.

Her: Hahaha if you had three then maybe

Me: Store is nearby. Bu I'll only get 2. got dizzy last time. Best to stay a little more sober.

Her Haha and I am going to the gym

Me: Really? You'll leave me to drink alone, while you burn calories in a much less enjoyable way...?

Her: Haha no no... I get to watch my hot trainer

Me: That's watching... Remember, I promised "much more enjoyable".
So, 8:30?

Her: Sorry guy I have something else going on. Member the guy at [event] on Friday?

Me: Yes, assumed he was a toy.

Her: He is fun

Me: So yes, a toy. Be here at 8:30 in yoga pants...

Her: Nope.

Me: And I thought you were just looking for unattached debauchery....
If it's the yoga pants thing, I'm not that picky...

Her: Yeah but not with the guy seeking attachment.
Hahahaha!!!

Me: You've worked hard to disqualify yourself as a gf atm. Which kills attachment... but I'm curious what the sex would be like sober.
I promise to only do dirty dirty things, not boyfriendy things...

Her: Hahaha funny.

Me: We both know there's an attraction. And for drunk, first time sex, I think we read each others' bodies very well.

Her: What if I said I wanted [event] guy to be more than a toy.

Me: Then I'd question you... you have been 100% against that. And I'm not competing with him. Just inviting you over for sex.

Her: No you don't need to compete and no to the sex.

Me: Worth a try . But I'll say what I should have said the first time you were going out... call me when you realize he's boring

 

[Franco]

luego,

Me: You should come over for sex

Well, it sounds like your calibration needs to be adjusted in your first message!

Remember, we treat women like sex objects in the bedroom, but you want to still be respectful to them over text. As much as she may know what she has with you is just purely sexual, the feeling of being used as a sex object (when you're not actually having sex yet) just feels degrading to them. Think about if you received a message like that from a girl -- the thought of "oh, sweet... sex..." might come to mind, but at the same time, it wouldn't necessarily get you aroused or in the mood to have it. It's almost like a robot just commanded you to do something.

You want the opening of your conversation to look something more like this:

You: Hey Jane, have any plans tomorrow evening? We should get together
Her: I don't, actually! I would like that
You: Great! We'll split a bottle of wine and make it a fun evening
Her: Oh, that sounds perfect! I can't wait

NOTE: This is a sample conversation of a girl who has already had sex with you; if it's a girl you haven't slept with yet, you'll probably have to arrange a date at a location

Once she comes over, then you can start escalating the conversation sexually when you're both in the moment.

Of course, if you're still trying to shed your "nice guy" phase by overcompensating a bit, it can actually be helpful to see the end results of it. Being an asshole is obviously a step up from being a nice guy, but calibration will help you go the distance. =)

- Franco

 

[luego]

Lol thanks Franco. Yes, the first message was intended to be a hard snap out of autopilot. We already had sex, on the first night, then we got "couply", while simultaneously not having sex again and having her push away and me get very chasey. I'd tried approaches similar to yours a couple times in the last month, with little effect; but I still see her weekly socially and she flirts crazily. So I figured I'd try a crazy opener.