FR Blind Date with HB8 Filipino

[NarrowJ]

There is this Filipino girl that works at the local insurance office. I have mortgage insurance, car insurance and watercraft insurance all through this one company. So, I'm in there occasionally here and there when I need to drop off some paperwork or sign a document or something. The office is literally 3 blocks from my house, so when they need something I just take it down there and drop it off. Easier than faxing. So, I chit chat with this little Filipino girl (receptionist) when I have to go in there. I'm refinancing my home, so I had to run in there yesterday.

She tells me how she has this cousin of hers that has been in the states for 6 years, and she's 28. Says she just got out of a relationship a few months ago and is looking to date, and commented that I seem like such a nice guy and wondered if I'd be interested in meeting her. Sure, I say. So, after she checks with her cousin and everything she texts me her number. I arrange a date, which ended up being last night.

I meet her at a little bar and grill after work. She is attractive, I'm saying an 8/10. Dressed very nicely. She's very warm as I introduce myself. She has a heavy accent, but articulates her words well enough that it's no issue communicating with her. We sit and order drinks. She gets a water, which I ask why she doesn't get a drink- and she says she has to work later. Apparently she works nights at a retirement center.

We get to talking and she tells me right off that she married a guy just to get her papers, and that she's not ashamed of it one bit because its very common and people do it all the time where she is from. I'm a little confused by this. She also tells me about how she's going on dates with guys and they are wanting her to only date them, but she tells me that she feels it's ok for her to date more than one guy. I of course agree with her on this.

She tells me she has an 11 year old son, and he was about 4 or 5 when she moved to the states. She had the boy at a young age (17) and her and the father were not "together". She explains that her country is conservative about these things, and her father and her do not talk anymore and this is the main reason (along with wanting to just get away and etc) for her to move to the US.

Due to the time constraint the date only lasted a couple hours as she had to get ready for work. I told her I wanted her to cook Filipino food for me sometime, and we're doing that Monday night.

The things I'm wondering about here are:

1) What's the deal with the whole "marrying just to get her papers". Is this legit? How does this work, and what does the man get out of this? Really just more curious about this than anything. Second question below is more important.

2) I've heard Filipino girls are DTF. Definitely can't wait until Monday. Any general input on seduction tactics with foreign women? I'm not sure what she's used to, or what she may respond to. Again, she's been in the US for several years so is it a moot point- just treat her like any other woman I'd try to take to bed?

Thanks in advance, guys!

 

[charming]

So it's Tuesday. How'd it go?

 

[NarrowJ]

So it's Tuesday. How'd it go?

Well, the date didn't end up going down. She sent me a text Saturday saying that she forgot she had to work, and wanted to reschedule for Thursday during the day. I have a lot going on and haven't gotten back to her. I guess if an 8 wants to do things on her schedule & terms, when I work 40+ hours per week and have a couple 9's on my regular - then she just doesn't get my time. Lol.

I may text her soon if I end up with some spare time. Who knows... But, if I do- and it results in something interesting happening- I'll be sure to post!

 

[Laowai]

I wouldn't stand her up necessarily. She is an 8 and a woman of (physical) beauty. So what if you bang 9s most of the time? I banged many 8s and a few 8.5s, yet if the opportunity is there and I can get to bang a 6 while putting in minimal effort, why not?

This girl is chasing you, it was her idea all of it, so just chill and lean back and show her some interest. If she starts to feel rejected and that you're aloof when she chases you like that, you'll crash and burn. Also, all those DTF stories of hers...

Again, you should get a better handle on logistics and get to understand her schedule better to minimize flakes that. Apart from that, you're already doing pretty well with banging your 9s and having 8s chase you. Doesn't get much better than that.

 

[NarrowJ]

Oh I hear you, man. I just legitimately don't feel like I have time for a 3-girl rotation right now- especially if one or more of them is rescheduling on me.

I have no qualms about replacing her with another 8+ who can't wait to see me and will drop other things she has going on in order to make time to hang with me at MY convenience

 

[NarrowJ]

So- I decided to text this girl yesterday. It was kind of weird, because she was all warm and receptive at first but then just dropped off of the conversation at the point of finalizing plans. Oh well. Anyway, wanted to post just in case people had thoughts.

Me 233: Hey HB8, sorry you haven't heard from me- been out of town for the past several days or so. How have you been? We should get together again soon.
Her 302: Oh hey how are you?
Me 330: Been pretty good. Busy! And you?
Her 337: Yeah I've been super busy too. I just got done moving across town here because I think I told you, but someone broke in my house!
Me 358: You did tell me that, yeah. Crazy! You liking your new place then?
Her 410: Yes, I like it. Very small and cozy and quiet.
Me 435: Well that's great! So hey- let's get a drink or a bite to eat this week.
Her 443: Depends on what day
Me 448: What do you have open? I'm pretty busy, but can probably free something up

-No Response-


Not sure what happened. Attraction expired? Auto-rejection because I didn't talk to her for 2 weeks? Or maybe needed a little more rapport-building before I offered the date? Other?

 

[Chase]

Narrow-

So- I decided to text this girl yesterday. It was kind of weird, because she was all warm and receptive at first but then just dropped off of the conversation at the point of finalizing plans. Oh well. Anyway, wanted to post just in case people had thoughts.

Me 233: Hey HB8, sorry you haven't heard from me- been out of town for the past several days or so. How have you been? We should get together again soon.
Her 302: Oh hey how are you?
Me 330: Been pretty good. Busy! And you?
Her 337: Yeah I've been super busy too. I just got done moving across town here because I think I told you, but someone broke in my house!
Me 358: You did tell me that, yeah. Crazy! You liking your new place then?
Her 410: Yes, I like it. Very small and cozy and quiet.
Me 435: Well that's great! So hey- let's get a drink or a bite to eat this week.
Her 443: Depends on what day
Me 448: What do you have open? I'm pretty busy, but can probably free something up

-No Response-


Not sure what happened. Attraction expired? Auto-rejection because I didn't talk to her for 2 weeks? Or maybe needed a little more rapport-building before I offered the date? Other?

Two things I notice:

First is that she was cool with you in her initial response, and you just texted right along, oblivious. I'm guessing you probably picked up on it, but didn't know how to respond to it, so tried to ignore it; to her, this just makes it seem like you don't 'get it,' which leads to eye-rolling and sighing and 'oh, he's just another clueless guy...!'

Second, you kind of ambushed her in this one. It was like, "Hey, how's it going! Let's go out!" and then she didn't say yes, and acted cool and aloof, so then it was friendly / platonic / social, and then a sudden 90 degree turn and "Well, anyway, let's go out!" again. The wording makes it sound like you were just fluffing her to get to the good parts... feels like you spent time dancing around the issue / feels "off" and insincere. It also feels like you're a one-trick pony; she ignores the date request, you keep asking without eliciting a more interested reaction out of her.

I'd word the conversation more like this:

• 
  You: Hey HB8, sorry to have dropped off the map a bit, out of town & just got back. Had a nice trip down south, though! How's tricks with you?
  Her: Oh hey how are you?
  You: All I get is an "oh hey how are you?" That mean I'm in the dog house?
  Her: Haha, no, just busy
  You: I'll make it up to you: how about I buy you an ice cream?
  Her: Depends on what day
  You: Yep, I'm definitely in the dog house.
  Her: Haha why do you say that?
  You: You know why
  Her: I told you, I'm busy right now
  You: I don't need my bifocals to read between your lines
  Her: You wear bifocals?
  You: When the mood is right. So, ice cream - you tell me days. I buy you ice cream. You let me out of dog house.
  Her: [schedule]

Basically, you don't know why she's cold, but you're treating it as she's mad at you for disappearing - if this is the reason, you'll warm her heart right up by recognizing it and being serious about rectifying it, and if it isn't it, you'll frame it as that and she'll start feeling as if you emotionally affected her and she auto-rejected, which means you're probably higher status than her and thus attractive... and her attraction rebounds.

Chase

 

[NarrowJ]

You're right, that first response was pretty cold. I didn't even realize it at the time. My thoughts were simply- "hey, I didn't call this girl in two weeks and she's still responding. Awesome!"

I think one of the things I need to work on is my awareness and perception, and also how to react accordingly. Your reply solidified that. Much appreciated, Chase!


-NJ

 

[NarrowJ]

This girl texted me last night and I replied this morning. She read the reply, but didnt respond to it. She probably thought something like: "ok, I texted you after you messed up, and then you wait a day to respond? Ugh"

And it's funny, our conversation went pretty much just like Chase's "mock-up" above. Here's the texts:

Her 2040: hi NarrowJ, how are you?
-next day-
Me 1004: Cathy, hey. Doing well! So how were the wedding(s)?
-no response-
Me 1457: I see you read my reply & didn't respond. That mean I'm in the dog house?
Her 1500: what do you mean dog house?
Me 1508: *sends link to urbandictionary.com definition of "in the dog house"*
Her 1511: oh I see
Me 1516: I'll make it up to you: how about I buy you lunch or something?
Her 1516: what you gonna do tonight?
Her 1518: any plans tonight?
Me 1535: Well I'm gone until Monday morning. You free sometime after then?
Her 1542: Monday? Maybe after 7 pm
Me 1546: that would work
Her 1547: Ok well I will see you Monday then
Me 1555: Great. I'll think of a good place and let you know where sometime before then
Her 1555: Sure

She can be pretty dry via text, but she's very warm and friendly in person. Guess we will see what goes down Monday night!

Chase: Thanks again for the superb advice!

-NJ

 

[Chase]

J, don't mention it.

Text is a weird medium, and you've got to be a little over-charming on it sometimes to make up for the loss of personal connection. Imagine the dashing prince, overly effusive in his gestures: "My lady! But of course, I am here to attend to your every need!"

Tends to get you better responses.

Chase

 

[NarrowJ]

Had my second date with HB8 Filipino, nearly one month after going on the first date. A lot of “cat and mouse” going on with this one. I’ll try to keep this short and get to the meaty stuff.

We meet at a little bar and grill at 7:30 last night. We are both exactly 5 minutes late, which she apologizes for being late- but I sort of have come to just expect this with any woman. Which is why I have started to make sure I show up either at the same time or after. She looks great, has a nice dress on and showing plenty of skin. I tell her “long time no see!” as she walks up and I tell her she looks great. We go in and get seated, and she doesn’t order a drink- so I just get a water. She asks me why I didn’t order a beer, and I just say that I would have if she had ordered something. She says we should just have drinks after dinner. I say that sounds like a good idea.

Conversation flows really well throughout dinner, I’m keeping her doing most of the talking while I smile and eye-fuck her. I don’t screen her much at all, since it’s a second date. She does call me out on a chase frame though, which was sort of funny. Well, funny because I thought I handled it ok. Here is how that went:

Her: So, you been thinking about me a lot?

Me: Well, yes I have. But I bet it’s because of your advanced seduction skills (sexy smile)

^^ this isn't exactly what I said- but I can't remember- so, paraphrasing here.

Her: Is that some kind of reverse psychology or something? (she also smiles when saying this)

Me: (smile) I don’t know what that means! But yeah, our first date went really well. So… (pause)… I had hoped that we could have gotten together again sooner than this. But, I know we have both been really busy lately.

Whew! I couldn’t come up with anything to challenge her with, so I went with the deflection instead. Seemed to work, I guess.

As we finish dinner, she asks where we should go to get drinks. Thinking about this, after the fact, I should have taken her to some bar somewhere. But, I tell her we can go up and sit at the bar here. I get up and grab her hand and help her up, and once standing, lead her by the small of her back up to the bar. On the way up there, she cracks a joke and leans into me really hard and grabs my forearm when I remove it from her back. We sit and order drinks. She starts talking about her ex-boyfriend of five years, and she tells me that for 4 and a half years they lived 5 hours apart and would just drive to see each other, and then after that long they moved in together. From that point, it only lasted 4 more months and she moved out and came back here to live, because he wanted her to just stay at home all the time and not work or anything. She said she just couldn’t do that. Hearing this, I’m getting the point that she’s pretty independent. I tell her that I find that most people that I gravitate toward and end up in friendships and relationships with are people that have strong ambitions and do things for themselves, and won’t over-rely on me- since I’m very busy and goal-oriented myself. I’m not real sure if I just qualified myself here, or if I’m screening her too? But she connects with me on this- big time.

After about 20 minutes of conversation she starts getting very touchy-feely with me. She’s leaning into me, putting her hand on my leg, rubbing my forearm, etc. I have had my hands on her too the whole time we’ve been sitting there. I feel like there’s a ton of sexual tension. When we make eye contact, all I can think about is thrusting my hard dick inside of her. She tells me to scratch her back. I do, but not too much. This touching and laughing is going on for about another hour and the restaurant is closing. So, I ask her if she would be up for coming back to watch a movie or a show or something at my house. She says that she would absolutely love to- but she has to be up at 6 AM. I give her a couple “oh come on, it’s not that late” and “its ok, I won’t have you out past your curfew” and etcetera. She just promises that we’ll do that next time, and so we get up and go. We hug outside, and I think about kissing her (maybe I should have?). But, I don’t and judging by her body language I think it may have been unexpected if I did. I don’t know. She tells me she had a great time (like 3 times, she says this!), and gets in her car and we both drive off.

She calls me about 2 minutes after we leave, and says she went the wrong way. She is laughing, and I said its probably because she recently moved and isn’t used to going that way. She agrees and tells me thanks again, and to get home safe. Then when I get home, I get a text from her asking if I made it. I say yes, and we exchange a couple more texts and say goodnight to one another.

This morning, she texted me “Hi! Goodmorning ”. She never really used exclamation points or smileys in texts until now. She’s always been pretty dry in her texting. I’d say I have her chasing. I told her this morning she still owes me some Filipino food, so Thursday night we’re going to go shopping together for the ingredients and she’s going to cook for me at my place.

I don’t see any way this doesn’t end in some really good sex, for both of us. The physical tension was as high as I’ve felt with a woman in some time, and I know she was feeling it too.

Wish me luck for Thursday! Hopefully we can change this thread title from FR to LR.

 

[NarrowJ]

Finally closed on this one tonight

She didn't cook for me, because neither of us were hungry (I had a late lunch today, and she just wasn't awfully hungry). So we met up about 5 and went to a Redbox and grabbed a movie. Headed to my place, put the movie in and sat down and started cuddling. I kissed her about 10 minutes into the movie, no LMR, great sex though. She came a lot, messed up my sheets haha. I actually got off twice, which is rare for me.

Anyway, all the seduction happened on the dates leading up. So not much to write about, it doesn't seem like. But, happy I stayed with this. She was a great lay. Nothing extremely freaky, but just overall it was really good. She is tiny, about 5'1" and very thin (which I love little girls).

Another success though. So that's my takeaway here.

Thanks to Chase and also Laowai - I decided to stick this one out and not only was it a pretty good learning experience, but some great sex is always nice too!


-NJ

 

[stratvm]

im running through NJ`s LR list thats been stickied and i have to point out - without any racial judgement or sg, i like exotic girls - that for white men south asian and indian girls are no challenge at all in general. even i have absolutely no problem with them especially with filipinas, here we are drowning in them.

if you - no not NJ - have difficulties with girls i encourage you to specialize in SE asians/indians, very easy and straightforward and you can get really nice ones without any problems. unfortunately they are too childish & servient for my taste & i think is rather impossible to change them...