- Joined
- Jan 20, 2023
- Messages
- 61
ok so this is a field report that hopefully is the last time I think about /discuss this.. just want some closure and then I can move on lol.
Over holidays was out and met two foreign girls, they were both at least 8.5-9's if not better but definitely my total TYPE in so many ways. They were both super similar looks wise. I pretty quickly hooked them (don't think they were used to getting hit on) and they were asking a bunch of Q's and for 4-5 minutes we had a really solid talk. Both were super sweet, chill and just really warm personalities and different from what I'm used to.
One of them (girl B) said she was visiting (girl A) from ___ and that girl A was studying here. I teased her about being new to the US, and at this point I assumed girl A was living here and made her the girl I would focus on.
After a few minutes I said we should grab a bite, and they both agreed. We walked over to a place and for next 45-1 hr or so we talked. They both were super nice and were saying how cool I was, asking about me, I showed them videos etc.. but girl B was definitely more friendly and interested in me. BUT because I assumed Girl B did not live here (compared to Girl A) I focused on girl A as I said.
Now here's where first mistake might have been. It was around 9 or so, and I got Girl A's number since they would be hanging out together the rest of time, and girl A had a US number (girl B had WhatsApp but I didn't do it for some reason). Lesson is to get both numbers.
I for some illogical reason said I was going to a bar/place after eating with them, and girl B asked "with some friends?" and I lied and said yes. In retrospect, this could have been a time to offer them to bar hop with me or something. But they had previously said they had a long day AND I am not used to insta-dating 2 girls and then doing something after.
In my head, the NEXT time we hung out I could make moves/do better. Mistake. After we ate, they said they had another 30 min before their "friend" (which I think was a lie) picked them up, so we walked around and I went shopping for things while they were there and had them recommend or not things to me. Again this was a chance I coudl have gone to get dessert with them, or something instead...
During this whole time Girl B and girl A (but mainly girl B) were asking me a LOT of questions and esp. girl B was laughing a lot etc interested in me. But still, bc I assumed girl A lived here, I entertained both but tried a lot to get Girl A more interested in me (in general her personality was more reserved and mature I guess than girl B).
Before I got the # and we left, I mentioned I could show them this cool ___ (basically a famous landmark thing that requires some exercise) and they agreed it sounded fun and to do it. In retrospect, this was probably too big a "thing" esp. if it felt awkward for them and I should have just said smoothies or coffee or something. But overall THIS part went pretty well, other than picking wrong girl. They had also said they were traveling to ___ soon, so my goal was to get them out before they left to travel again.
yet another mistake happend when I did not text girl A at all that night. we had already exchanged on text our names in person that day, and I (for some reason) didn't think to text again. I waited till the next day late-afternoon/early evening, thinkign she would reply fairly quickly and we could get thigns moving.
instead, it took her another 18+ hrs to text (bc they were traveling/sight seeing all day I think) and after she texted, I immediately tried to make plans. She didn't write back till like 1.5 days later and said something like they arrived in ____ but they'd be back in 2.5 weeks and we could hang then.
This was another mistake, when I *possibly could have just texted back and forth a few times and then tried to make plans. But even then the plan to visit a landmark was probably too big a *thing anyway and might have led to same result.
From there I didn't text back and made it seem all was good, but it turns out from her social media that it "seems" like she was still in my area for at least another week (despite saying they already got to ___), and even though we texted back and forth a lot, when I asked if she was back in ___? I never got a response
It turns out after they had traveled to ___, BOTH of them went back to their hometown. Girl A who I thought lived here was just here for a semester it seems as an international student.
Had I known this from the start, I would have been a lot more active in going for Girl B (who liked me more anyway), and who I had much better natural chemistry with. Knowing Girl A didn't live here permanently-ish either would have made me try for a LOT more that first time we met.
But overall this def. sucked haha. Both of them were gorgeous and I definitely could have done "something" on the initial time we met up, but without me realizing Girl A didn't live here (and Girl B was the one who liked me), it might not have made a difference anyway.
Still, this has caused me a lot of sleepless nights of regret and sadness, but putting it all down on writing has been good closure.
Lessons are just to be super alert logistically on EVERYTHING (even if a little awkward) when good situations arise and to be less needy on text (and write her that same night- strike while iron is hot). Less needy on text is a big thing I still need to work on. It has taken a LONG time to get over this, but I think I finally am just moving on and focused on better opportunities (with girls who actually live here haha) in the future
Over holidays was out and met two foreign girls, they were both at least 8.5-9's if not better but definitely my total TYPE in so many ways. They were both super similar looks wise. I pretty quickly hooked them (don't think they were used to getting hit on) and they were asking a bunch of Q's and for 4-5 minutes we had a really solid talk. Both were super sweet, chill and just really warm personalities and different from what I'm used to.
One of them (girl B) said she was visiting (girl A) from ___ and that girl A was studying here. I teased her about being new to the US, and at this point I assumed girl A was living here and made her the girl I would focus on.
After a few minutes I said we should grab a bite, and they both agreed. We walked over to a place and for next 45-1 hr or so we talked. They both were super nice and were saying how cool I was, asking about me, I showed them videos etc.. but girl B was definitely more friendly and interested in me. BUT because I assumed Girl B did not live here (compared to Girl A) I focused on girl A as I said.
Now here's where first mistake might have been. It was around 9 or so, and I got Girl A's number since they would be hanging out together the rest of time, and girl A had a US number (girl B had WhatsApp but I didn't do it for some reason). Lesson is to get both numbers.
I for some illogical reason said I was going to a bar/place after eating with them, and girl B asked "with some friends?" and I lied and said yes. In retrospect, this could have been a time to offer them to bar hop with me or something. But they had previously said they had a long day AND I am not used to insta-dating 2 girls and then doing something after.
In my head, the NEXT time we hung out I could make moves/do better. Mistake. After we ate, they said they had another 30 min before their "friend" (which I think was a lie) picked them up, so we walked around and I went shopping for things while they were there and had them recommend or not things to me. Again this was a chance I coudl have gone to get dessert with them, or something instead...
During this whole time Girl B and girl A (but mainly girl B) were asking me a LOT of questions and esp. girl B was laughing a lot etc interested in me. But still, bc I assumed girl A lived here, I entertained both but tried a lot to get Girl A more interested in me (in general her personality was more reserved and mature I guess than girl B).
Before I got the # and we left, I mentioned I could show them this cool ___ (basically a famous landmark thing that requires some exercise) and they agreed it sounded fun and to do it. In retrospect, this was probably too big a "thing" esp. if it felt awkward for them and I should have just said smoothies or coffee or something. But overall THIS part went pretty well, other than picking wrong girl. They had also said they were traveling to ___ soon, so my goal was to get them out before they left to travel again.
yet another mistake happend when I did not text girl A at all that night. we had already exchanged on text our names in person that day, and I (for some reason) didn't think to text again. I waited till the next day late-afternoon/early evening, thinkign she would reply fairly quickly and we could get thigns moving.
instead, it took her another 18+ hrs to text (bc they were traveling/sight seeing all day I think) and after she texted, I immediately tried to make plans. She didn't write back till like 1.5 days later and said something like they arrived in ____ but they'd be back in 2.5 weeks and we could hang then.
This was another mistake, when I *possibly could have just texted back and forth a few times and then tried to make plans. But even then the plan to visit a landmark was probably too big a *thing anyway and might have led to same result.
From there I didn't text back and made it seem all was good, but it turns out from her social media that it "seems" like she was still in my area for at least another week (despite saying they already got to ___), and even though we texted back and forth a lot, when I asked if she was back in ___? I never got a response
It turns out after they had traveled to ___, BOTH of them went back to their hometown. Girl A who I thought lived here was just here for a semester it seems as an international student.
Had I known this from the start, I would have been a lot more active in going for Girl B (who liked me more anyway), and who I had much better natural chemistry with. Knowing Girl A didn't live here permanently-ish either would have made me try for a LOT more that first time we met.
But overall this def. sucked haha. Both of them were gorgeous and I definitely could have done "something" on the initial time we met up, but without me realizing Girl A didn't live here (and Girl B was the one who liked me), it might not have made a difference anyway.
Still, this has caused me a lot of sleepless nights of regret and sadness, but putting it all down on writing has been good closure.
Lessons are just to be super alert logistically on EVERYTHING (even if a little awkward) when good situations arise and to be less needy on text (and write her that same night- strike while iron is hot). Less needy on text is a big thing I still need to work on. It has taken a LONG time to get over this, but I think I finally am just moving on and focused on better opportunities (with girls who actually live here haha) in the future
