Exactly, this is what I meant,
@Will_V. The reason behind me asking this question is that I had multiple successes without adhering to "the game rules". So, I was trying to understand if it was just a stroke of luck, or given everything I have ( race, look, fashion, .....etc..) I can seduce women without adhering strictly to the rules.
Another example, I am an ethnic minority where I am. Some women are attracted to my race and accent. For these women, my room for error is just so large. I literally can get away with most of breaking the game rules.
What confuses me is :
1- I do what I consider it to be a mistake.
2- I assume she lost attraction.
3- To my surprise, she is either more attracted or at the same level like before.
4- Now, she gives me all the positive responses but I am telling myself. " Hey, I broke those rules. Now, she is giving me all the positive responses. There has to be something off here" Then, I start doubting myself.
Hope this makes sense to you
@Will_V
Seduction is about emotions, the emotions that she feels around you. Your actions are less important than those emotions, and while your actions have some influence over those emotions, it is far less than the influence of your self expression.
Seduction is really about contagious self-expression. Girls are attracted to any instance of a guy whose inherent drive to express himself overcomes the social forces that seek to control him. Not only because of what it says about him, but because girls themselves feel repressed in terms of what they are or aren't allowed to experience or express.
Guys who come into seduction are often overwhelmingly controlled by forces outside of their self expression - it seems to me it is typically either a) social repressive forces or b) fear and desperation. To deal with this it is useful to create a set of behaviours for them to follow that roughly expresses self-confidence, willingness to lead, and a more-or-less balance of investment, which are markers of successful men with high self esteem and boundaries.
These are generally very good behaviors to follow in life as a rule - but since seduction is emotional, following them isn't enough. And sometimes breaking them in ways that express a higher level of freedom of action, rather than because of a desire to please or chase, helps to stimulate emotion and spontaneity.
In seduction as in social interactions, people begin to identify you as a person by your fundamentals, and then by your actions. But as the interaction progresses, if you still don't easily fit into a category, they take you as a whole, opening up their perception toward you and losing focus on the details. At this point, as long as you are stimulating emotions and have a strong frame, you have a lot more freedom of expression. Whereas there are other guys who come in and are instantly treated as a stereotype of some category that is known and understood, and therefore have very little room to maneuver and create very little excitement (because excitement is about change, about self-expression against the backdrop of normality).
When you are clearly in a minority group, such as an ethnic minority, it is understood that you are much more of a wildcard than someone who fits right into the herd. Everything about you may be different, and you are not readily categorized. Not to mention that people who don't fit well into society often become extremely pragmatic, adaptable, and more risk-taking, out of necessity, compared to those for whom the rules have been prepared. This means that, as long as you are stimulating emotions and have a strong frame, your actions do much less to send you into any specific category compared to other guys and you remain compelling and exciting for her. If you appear downtrodden and beaten by your circumstances though, you are again categorized, this time simply as a failure.
A lot of what seducers do in terms of fundamentals is about quickly separating themselves from known categories of men, or at least the typical ones. Pretty much any known category is fundamentally boring for women. They are interested in what is different, what is operating to effect change, what is self-expressing in contrast to the norm. As long as that difference is not so much as to create confusion and anxiety in her, and appears to be operating in some kind of successful manner, she is curious and her attention is captured.
The thing about self-expression though is, it doesn't ultimately require being different from anything else, what it does require is being true to itself and satisfied within itself. Because most guys are, as I mentioned earlier, either compelled by social forces or by fear and desperation, everything they do is a negotiation, an outcome-dependent behavior, regardless of how much they try to mask it otherwise. People instinctively know, especially women who have a higher level of social intuition, when someone is doing something as a negotiation or when it is an action done for its own sake and pleasure. The more that you differentiate and convey that you are someone who operates out of self expression rather than negotiation from a known position within the social hierarchy, the more that women transfer attention away from your actions and toward your presence and its effect upon her.
