FR "Can you dance with me? :)"

[Licker]

Saturday, 1 June

It rains just enough to ruin my plans of scouting at 5PM. Around 11.30PM, went to a fancy, famous club in town with 2 female friends. They wanted to dance.
It was a dance club alright, but man was it small. I have seen coffee shops bigger than this. The whole area consisted of a small hall which was packed and had a small bar on the left wing. And a smoking area out in the open. You could circle the area in 5 minutes or less. Also, the inside was too loud without having to scream in someone's ear. I need to pick better spots.

I felt overdressed - a navy-blue button-down shirt with the top two buttons open, black semi-official pants, and black Chelsea boots. 98% of guys were dressed in T-shirts and jeans, with sneakers. Most chicks were average or below average in looks. There were a few cute ones and a few hot ones though. And I honestly think I looked okay, but not my best that night. Had slight dark circles, and was unbothered to trim the side-patches (usually I just go for a goatee and a moustache).

Since the venue was small and any approach going bad would mean I was fucked for the night, my AA was unusually high. Also, 4-6 male lone wolves were hunting and scanning the room, but most females were in groups. The rare few that were alone were mostly (but not entirely) prostitutes.

Anyway, after 15 minutes I split up with my friends and decided to chat with people to get the social fluids flowing. Found a South Korean guy hovering near me in the smoking area and chatted him up. He was nice, and we traded contacts after shooting the shit for a while. I went inside again.

I wasn't feeling my best though still. I was sleep-deprived and felt like a half-awake zombie. Also, walking around, dancing and smoking wasn't helping either. I still decided to chat up as many people as possible, hoping to get some approaches in - either warm or cold and talk to some girls. I decided to smile a little and take it easy, trying to be as energetic as possible. I was still very low-energy though.

I deliberately made eye contact with every girl whom I thought was even remotely cute and circled the area, with an excuse of drinking water at the bar and checking up on my friends. I get good reactions - chicks playing with hair, smiling back, etc, but the place is so jammed-packed, my AA is super high. I repeated this process the entire night. In and out. Check on friends - chit-chat and dance with them, talk to random people, drink water to stay awake, dance a little with groups and single people, etc.

Over the night I managed to talk, open / engage with ~16 people. And out of them all, about 8-10 girls, out of which 2 interactions were of any significance. The rest were social and I didn't like the girls too much and couldn't summon the energy in me to flirt.

The first one was a total cutie and she was with a group of girls because one of her friends liked the South Korean guy. The foreigner effect is real because he had no game whatsoever - and still, girls were after him. We were out chilling in the smoking area.

I was just chill and framed him as the prize in front of everyone, "Hey dude, I told you they all like you." Soon afterward, 2 chicks out of 5 talked to him.
I stay silent and smoke, just chilling. Inside I'm tired as fuck and have lost my social muscles to talk honestly. It's also 3 AM.

The cutie opens me, "What's your name?"

I summon as much enthusiasm and happiness as I can out of my stomach and say my name while extending my hand. She takes it, smiles a little, and teases me by repeating my name in an innocent teasing way. I thought, perhaps, I said it with too much confidence and enthusiasm haha.

Then she looks away and talks to her friend. After a few seconds, there is a lull and she is sitting quietly. I asked her, "What's your name?"

She says her name. It's quite unusual and unique.

"That's such a nice name "

"Thanks "

"You must hear that a lot right? "

"Yeah... sometimes " She was catching on that I was trying to flirt with her. Surrounded by a group, I didn't know how to convey heavy sexual undertones without putting too much social pressure on her to exit with plausible deniability. But there was a light tease going on in the interaction.

"Are you not from here?"

"No. I am." - in an Of-Course-What-Else-Do-You-Think-Sweet manner.

"Your family stay here?"

"Yeah." - same yeah. Of-Course kinda tone.

"And you are from here too?"

"Yeahhhh" She sounded like a cute puppy while she said this haha.

"Oh, okay "

"What do you do? Did you graduate already?" She asks.

I had just taken a drag, I exhaled the smoke out and paused for a second before replying. She took offense at that.
"Nothing? haha". Like How-Dare-You-Not-Reply-To-Me-Instantly-I'm-Cute-But-Slightly-Annoyed.

"Well, I just quit my job, and I..." And then her friend jumps in, speaks to her, and takes her group away. I planned to build intrigue, ramp up sexual undertones, and then launch into an emotionally stimulating story[SMMA Key2]. But, oh well haha.

After a while, I see her again inside but she just dances and makes eye contact. I was too exhausted to re-open. So I just mirror her and dance back.

The second interaction was kinda funny.

Was dancing and vibing with a group with the South Korean dude, and then I just decided to pull back and rest against the wall. Open body language zoned out, smile on my face.

A busty, slightly older chick, I was eye-fucking earlier near the bar approaches me. "Can you dance with me? " She asks with the uttermost niceness. I almost melted.

"Sure!", I take her hand and we find a spot in the center of the dance floor. Take her hands in mine and we dance a little. I lean over to her ear, and shoot direct, "Are you single?"

"No, haha. I have a husband... [says something but it's inaudible].. but I saw you looking at me and wanted to dance with you "

"Are you trying to make him jealous "

"No, haha. he just doesn't dance.. "

She asks my name. I tell her. I ask for hers and she repeats it since I couldn't get it the first time.

I take it she isn't interested and just wanted to dance and her husband hates it. I felt her ring finger. No ring. I even looked at it to make sure. No ring. Maybe she was lying to not get hit on and just dance.

Regardless, I make her spin. Get some incidental touch by moving her out of the way by placing my hand on her lower back - from a scruffy-looking dude pushing through the crowd. But after a while, I lose interest. She senses it and then after a while says she has to go, and thanks me. I wish her goodbye and left.

I get tired as fuck as it's 4 AM now, and so are my 2 friends. Say my goodbyes to the people I met, and left the venue.

I didn't try to number close at all cause they are flaky in clubs.

Takeaways:

1. Popular clubs are shit. Women are young, kinda wanna-be's, and are mostly average. Some of them were quite cute though, but too flat for my tastes. Are my standards too high for chicks to NOT have belly fat and be busty? Idk.
2. Had a masterclass in attainability. It is way harder to manage it if you are low-energy, lack interest in them, and dress better and socially outclass them.
3. It's harder to be in a sexual state if you are tired as fuck and the chicks are not as attractive. Making it harder to use GWM/SMMA effectively. Sleep is very important.

I'm still figuring out night game dynamics. Any feedback from anyone is welcome!

 

[Chase]

@Freakester,

Nice work. You didn't have a lot to work with in the venue but you made the rounds and got a few decent approaches in.

Tough going when you're tired, too.

A bit of feedback:

I felt overdressed - a navy-blue button-down shirt with the top two buttons open, black semi-official pants, and black Chelsea boots. 98% of guys were dressed in T-shirts and jeans, with sneakers.

No, not overdressed.

If most dudes are dressed like they just rolled out of the living room, a button-down and some nice pants and shoes sets you a notch above.

Now, if everyone there was wearing button-downs and nice pants, that's when you want to roll in in an extra fancy shirt or a blazer.

When everyone there is wearing blazers, that's when you want an extra fancy blazer.

Etc.

Very important to stand out.

Your being well-dressed in a sea of fashion mediocrity probably has something to do with all the approach invitations you were getting (and you do seem to have been getting a lot).

And I honestly think I looked okay, but not my best that night. Had slight dark circles, and was unbothered to trim the side-patches (usually I just go for a goatee and a moustache).

It probably hurt less than you think.

Since the venue was small and any approach going bad would mean I was fucked for the night, my AA was unusually high. Also, 4-6 male lone wolves were hunting and scanning the room, but most females were in groups. The rare few that were alone were mostly (but not entirely) prostitutes.

Anyway, after 15 minutes I split up with my friends

Is it possible to take the girls with you as you go around approaching women?

Generally girls get off on their guy friend chatting up women (unless they are jealous for him themselves).

Makes opening a lot easier -- especially if the friends are hot.

I wasn't feeling my best though still. I was sleep-deprived and felt like a half-awake zombie. Also, walking around, dancing and smoking wasn't helping either. I still decided to chat up as many people as possible, hoping to get some approaches in - either warm or cold and talk to some girls.

Nice resolve, and a good approach for dealing with low energy.

I deliberately made eye contact with every girl whom I thought was even remotely cute and circled the area, with an excuse of drinking water at the bar and checking up on my friends. I get good reactions - chicks playing with hair, smiling back, etc,

That's what I'm talking about with being well-dressed helping and being a little bit unshaven probably not hurting much.

Still sounds like you were one of the top guys there (if not THE top guy there), appearances-wise -- probably also socializing-wise, too.

I repeated this process the entire night. In and out. Check on friends - chit-chat and dance with them, talk to random people, drink water to stay awake, dance a little with groups and single people, etc.

Good process.

The first one was a total cutie and she was with a group of girls because one of her friends liked the South Korean guy. The foreigner effect is real because he had no game whatsoever - and still, girls were after him. We were out chilling in the smoking area.

I was just chill and framed him as the prize in front of everyone, "Hey dude, I told you they all like you." Soon afterward, 2 chicks out of 5 talked to him.
I stay silent and smoke, just chilling. Inside I'm tired as fuck and have lost my social muscles to talk honestly. It's also 3 AM.

The cutie opens me, "What's your name?"

I summon as much enthusiasm and happiness as I can out of my stomach and say my name while extending my hand. She takes it, smiles a little, and teases me by repeating my name in an innocent teasing way. I thought, perhaps, I said it with too much confidence and enthusiasm haha.

Then she looks away and talks to her friend. After a few seconds, there is a lull and she is sitting quietly. I asked her, "What's your name?"

She says her name. It's quite unusual and unique.

"That's such a nice name "

"Thanks "

"You must hear that a lot right? "

"Yeah... sometimes " She was catching on that I was trying to flirt with her. Surrounded by a group, I didn't know how to convey heavy sexual undertones without putting too much social pressure on her to exit with plausible deniability. But there was a light tease going on in the interaction.

"Are you not from here?"

"No. I am." - in an Of-Course-What-Else-Do-You-Think-Sweet manner.

"Your family stay here?"

"Yeah." - same yeah. Of-Course kinda tone.

"And you are from here too?"

"Yeahhhh" She sounded like a cute puppy while she said this haha.

"Oh, okay "

"What do you do? Did you graduate already?" She asks.

I had just taken a drag, I exhaled the smoke out and paused for a second before replying. She took offense at that.
"Nothing? haha". Like How-Dare-You-Not-Reply-To-Me-Instantly-I'm-Cute-But-Slightly-Annoyed.

"Well, I just quit my job, and I..." And then her friend jumps in, speaks to her, and takes her group away. I planned to build intrigue, ramp up sexual undertones, and then launch into an emotionally stimulating story[SMMA Key2]. But, oh well haha.

From her opening you, voice tone, & sticking with it despite the uninspiring conversation, it seems like she was into it.

Your conversation could use some tightening up. Maybe it's just that you were tired.

But generally you want to have a few go-to game elements you can use even if tired.

e.g.:

• Find something to tease her on quick
• Find something to compliment or qualify her on quick
• Find something to ask for compliance on quick

All ways of signaling this is a flirtation and kicking things off.

In loud, crowded venues it's also good form to find an excuse to get the girl leaning into you and smiling/laughing quickly -- that way her friends are seeing her acting attracted to you and are a lot less likely to pull her away like they did here.

An easy one compliance-wise is after teasing & qualifying her, ask her to see whatever earring or necklace she has on and motion her to lean into you to show you. If she's still smiling while she's leaning in, that's a clear signal to the friends. If she smiles even more because of whatever you're saying to her once she's leaned in, clearer still.

One other note: long explanations in loud/ADD environments are counterproductive. So "What do you do?" --> "Well I just quit my job and blah blah blah (some explanation)" is too much. You need to lead with the most important stuff. What you led with here comes across in an ADD environment as "I don't know what I'm doing right now" which isn't very high value. Instead, better to tease or be ambiguous, then once you've baited her in, expand on that:

HER: What do you do?
YOU: [something pattern interrupting or teasing]
HER: Huh? Really? [some question]

You can even just tell her your line of work, but in an interesting way. It doesn't matter if you're between jobs; you still "do" that thing, whatever your work is.

Or tell her a hobby. "What do you do?" --> "Surf, snowboard, and ski." --> "No, I mean for work!" --> "Oh, right! I [interesting short description]."

After a while, I see her again inside but she just dances and makes eye contact. I was too exhausted to re-open. So I just mirror her and dance back.

Escalation pattern here:

1. Eye contact
2. (if returned) Smile
3. (if returned) Wave
4. (if returned) Beckon over

It's pretty low energy and if at any point she doesn't return the gesture you just go back to ignoring.

If she does return the gesture, you just proceed down the list.

Takeaways:

1. Popular clubs are shit. Women are young, kinda wanna-be's, and are mostly average. Some of them were quite cute though, but too flat for my tastes. Are my standards too high for chicks to NOT have belly fat and be busty? Idk.
2. Had a masterclass in attainability. It is way harder to manage it if you are low-energy, lack interest in them, and dress better and socially outclass them.
3. It's harder to be in a sexual state if you are tired as fuck and the chicks are not as attractive. Making it harder to use GWM/SMMA effectively. Sleep is very important.

I'm still figuring out night game dynamics. Any feedback from anyone is welcome!

Good work on these.

Being tired makes it a lot harder.

Your fundamentals seemed like they were buoying you up though.

And your process is solid -- just keep circulating and socializing and keep that momentum up.

Tighten up your early game and get a few default processes in place so you know how to deal with these various common situations well, and you'll be flying!

Cheers,
Chase