I met this girl from the online dating app coffee meets bagel. She's a a 28 year old girl from the Philippines, studying at a prestigious university to get her master's degree. If there's anything that you notice that I could improve on, please share.
First Date:
I first up up with this girl at a dive bar in DuPont, Washington D.C. As the bar was too crowded, we sat at one of the booths. Personally, I don’t like booths because the setting is less intimate and I can’t give her gentle touches to let her know I’m interested. Anyway, immediately after meeting she got all wide-eyed and said, “Wow…you’re wearing a suit!” I instantly knew she was interested. She was making jokes and seemed to be having a good time.
Shortly after we sat down, quickly built up an emotional connection with her. Within a few minutes of meeting each other, she asked what city I would love to live in. I replied Hong Kong, and she belched out “Wow..I…love Hong Kong! My parents and I travel there at least once a year. She was laughing the whole time, and I was skeptical to take that as interest. Although I barely made any jokes, it was mostly all her, and she seemed to be enjoying her time with me. About halfway through the date, after a high note, I attempted to invite her home to cook dinner. Conversation as follows:
Me: So I’m kinda hungry, and was thinking…
Her: so later I have to pick up my friend from the train station. She’s coming from Baltimore and we’re going to get food all week.
I believe she said this to deflect my question on continuing to hangout, but I didn’t persist with it, as I kept the date to strictly an information date with no pull there-on-after. Though probably she had no idea I was going to ask her to come cook at place, and likely thought I was going to say lets get dinner at some restaurant.
When the date ended, we parted ways from the metro, without hugging. The morning after, I emailed her telling her I enjoyed our drinks and conversation, which she replied by saying that we should get Phở (Vietnamese noodle soup) sometime (i.e. let’s meet for a second date).
What I can improve on:
• Work on chase framing and getting her aroused. E.g. ask her how she chose her field of study, then follow up by saying “I find girls who know what they want and how to get it to be really attractive.”
• Next time find a bar with less crowded bar seating (e.g. Courthaus Social).
• Get her logistics down (where she lives, what she’s the rest of the night weekend) before I decide to pull.
Second Date:
For the second date I invited her out for dinner. Although she suggested after the first date that we get Phở, I never brought that up and ignored her suggestion outright. For intrigue, I told her to meet at the metro stop, where we walked to the grocery store to buy ingredients together. To get investment from her, I told her I’d buy the food and asked if she would buy a bottle of wine, which she obliged. While walking to my apartment, the question never came up where we were going, so not protest I had to get her over coming to my place.
Once we were making dinner together, I gave her little jobs to do; she seemed happy to help. After dinner we went to my room where I showed her pictures from my travels on my laptop. About 15 minutes in, I went for the kiss, but she was moved her head away. From there, I sat a little farther apart to give her distance. I told myself to persist as she didn’t show signs of disinterest in me.
I’m pretty sure she’s from a pretty conservative background by her behavior, as she’s from the Philippines. Further, the entire time she kept biting her nails repeatedly, which I took to be a sign of nerves. One thing that I've read on body language that I strongly believes holds true is that an unusual behavior doesn't mean much, unless one observes patterns of that behavior. That made me more persistent with her in that I needed to lead her to sex and show her its what she wanted.
10 minutes later I went for a kiss again, and kiss her for 10 seconds, then pulled back and told her to not be greedy. 5 minutes later, I kissed her passionately but she protested. From then on, it was wash, rinse, and repeat with heating up the passion and then bring it to a halt. I kept giving her kisses, then pulling back to get her comfortable. Once I started removing her clothes (she had on triple layers everywhere, literally), she protested and said this was too difficult and maybe she should go. Once she said that, I pulled back to give her space. She stood up off the bed as if she was about to grab her stuff and leave, but looked at me completely unfazed by my behavior, and said:
Her: Wow, most guys act all crazy, but you’re not acting weird or anything. You’re okay with me leaving?
Me: Yup if you want to leave you can, its cool, I’m gonna relax, take it easy. I had a long day anyway and could probably use some rest.
Her: Shouldn't you be not happy, or disappointed?
Me: I’m not like most guys who get all worked up; I want you to be comfortable.
Then she sat back on my bed, and I attacked her with lots of passionate kisses all over her body. From that point I knew there would be minimal resistance to sex. I passed her test.
Soon I started taking more clothes off.
Her: We can't be doing "it" though.
Me: Whoa, what did you have in mind? (said with sexy contact)
She looked back at me and laughed, and starting putting her hands down my shirt. Once more clothes were off, I grabbed her hand down my pants and she started rubbing me down down there.
We started having sex and she was extremely tight. She enjoyed it heavily. Halfway through, she said, “O.M.G.! I’m not use to it being this big!” Granted, I’m probably average but figured she said that out of her conservative background and what I assume to be lack of experience. One of my favorite lines a girl's every told me.
The entire escalation to sex took probably a good two hours. From her initial resistance, I thought we wouldn't become lovers, but she never left so I figured that it was on but I just had to keep going and getting her more comfortable. If she wants to stay and doesn't make a an immediate effort to leave, she wants you two to shag each others' brains out.
First Date:
I first up up with this girl at a dive bar in DuPont, Washington D.C. As the bar was too crowded, we sat at one of the booths. Personally, I don’t like booths because the setting is less intimate and I can’t give her gentle touches to let her know I’m interested. Anyway, immediately after meeting she got all wide-eyed and said, “Wow…you’re wearing a suit!” I instantly knew she was interested. She was making jokes and seemed to be having a good time.
Shortly after we sat down, quickly built up an emotional connection with her. Within a few minutes of meeting each other, she asked what city I would love to live in. I replied Hong Kong, and she belched out “Wow..I…love Hong Kong! My parents and I travel there at least once a year. She was laughing the whole time, and I was skeptical to take that as interest. Although I barely made any jokes, it was mostly all her, and she seemed to be enjoying her time with me. About halfway through the date, after a high note, I attempted to invite her home to cook dinner. Conversation as follows:
Me: So I’m kinda hungry, and was thinking…
Her: so later I have to pick up my friend from the train station. She’s coming from Baltimore and we’re going to get food all week.
I believe she said this to deflect my question on continuing to hangout, but I didn’t persist with it, as I kept the date to strictly an information date with no pull there-on-after. Though probably she had no idea I was going to ask her to come cook at place, and likely thought I was going to say lets get dinner at some restaurant.
When the date ended, we parted ways from the metro, without hugging. The morning after, I emailed her telling her I enjoyed our drinks and conversation, which she replied by saying that we should get Phở (Vietnamese noodle soup) sometime (i.e. let’s meet for a second date).
What I can improve on:
• Work on chase framing and getting her aroused. E.g. ask her how she chose her field of study, then follow up by saying “I find girls who know what they want and how to get it to be really attractive.”
• Next time find a bar with less crowded bar seating (e.g. Courthaus Social).
• Get her logistics down (where she lives, what she’s the rest of the night weekend) before I decide to pull.
Second Date:
For the second date I invited her out for dinner. Although she suggested after the first date that we get Phở, I never brought that up and ignored her suggestion outright. For intrigue, I told her to meet at the metro stop, where we walked to the grocery store to buy ingredients together. To get investment from her, I told her I’d buy the food and asked if she would buy a bottle of wine, which she obliged. While walking to my apartment, the question never came up where we were going, so not protest I had to get her over coming to my place.
Once we were making dinner together, I gave her little jobs to do; she seemed happy to help. After dinner we went to my room where I showed her pictures from my travels on my laptop. About 15 minutes in, I went for the kiss, but she was moved her head away. From there, I sat a little farther apart to give her distance. I told myself to persist as she didn’t show signs of disinterest in me.
I’m pretty sure she’s from a pretty conservative background by her behavior, as she’s from the Philippines. Further, the entire time she kept biting her nails repeatedly, which I took to be a sign of nerves. One thing that I've read on body language that I strongly believes holds true is that an unusual behavior doesn't mean much, unless one observes patterns of that behavior. That made me more persistent with her in that I needed to lead her to sex and show her its what she wanted.
10 minutes later I went for a kiss again, and kiss her for 10 seconds, then pulled back and told her to not be greedy. 5 minutes later, I kissed her passionately but she protested. From then on, it was wash, rinse, and repeat with heating up the passion and then bring it to a halt. I kept giving her kisses, then pulling back to get her comfortable. Once I started removing her clothes (she had on triple layers everywhere, literally), she protested and said this was too difficult and maybe she should go. Once she said that, I pulled back to give her space. She stood up off the bed as if she was about to grab her stuff and leave, but looked at me completely unfazed by my behavior, and said:
Her: Wow, most guys act all crazy, but you’re not acting weird or anything. You’re okay with me leaving?
Me: Yup if you want to leave you can, its cool, I’m gonna relax, take it easy. I had a long day anyway and could probably use some rest.
Her: Shouldn't you be not happy, or disappointed?
Me: I’m not like most guys who get all worked up; I want you to be comfortable.
Then she sat back on my bed, and I attacked her with lots of passionate kisses all over her body. From that point I knew there would be minimal resistance to sex. I passed her test.
Soon I started taking more clothes off.
Her: We can't be doing "it" though.
Me: Whoa, what did you have in mind? (said with sexy contact)
She looked back at me and laughed, and starting putting her hands down my shirt. Once more clothes were off, I grabbed her hand down my pants and she started rubbing me down down there.
We started having sex and she was extremely tight. She enjoyed it heavily. Halfway through, she said, “O.M.G.! I’m not use to it being this big!” Granted, I’m probably average but figured she said that out of her conservative background and what I assume to be lack of experience. One of my favorite lines a girl's every told me.
The entire escalation to sex took probably a good two hours. From her initial resistance, I thought we wouldn't become lovers, but she never left so I figured that it was on but I just had to keep going and getting her more comfortable. If she wants to stay and doesn't make a an immediate effort to leave, she wants you two to shag each others' brains out.
