Hey so I had a question regarding talking with people that you kind of know of. As Background I'm in college and i've meet some bunches of people just in previous classes and so are more acquaintances that are friendly with small talk but nothing past that. We have some mutual friends but not much else. I think this is called the social circle periphery? When in class we all kind of have our established spots and I don't sit with these groups of people but i would like to grow my social circle with these people. What would you guys recommend to start talking to them and become more involved? My thinking of opening was along the lines of needing a new perspective in the classroom but I'm still new and don't know what a good way to handle this would be.
- Joined
- Aug 12, 2015
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- 129
Going right up to a group of people can go really well or really bad. Something easier would be to take note of who is in the group you would like to get into get into a convo with one before class starts make friends and then sit down with them in the group - congrats you are part of the group. Something you have to realise is 99% of people are bad at meeting you new people - they all just let it happen. A while ago I was talking to two girls shone was telling me how they met each other : she walked up to her and said "I had a dream about you" lols. I kid you not.
So obviously you need some social skills to pull that off without coming across as creepy but even if you open and there is a little bit of why are we talking vibe its ok because you'll both work through it if you want to talk to each other and then it dissapears. We naturally tend to attract people that we will get along with it just happens. As far as exactly what you say you should probs come up with something yourself but something as simple as : are you in XYZ class? Dude that last test murdered my brain.And now you are talking about the test mission accomplished! Then once you're in the group introduce yourself to everyone and make small talk.
If you do just want to open the group this issue here is you have to address the whole group for the first bit - which is really hard if its more than 4 people even 4 is hard and I personally am not a fan.If its less that just use the same open and go from there. Just remember to try use non committed body language so it looks like you could leave at any time - then people aren't worried about you being a burden. Also try to match the energy levels of the group - if they are super loud you must be too etc.
Skid
So obviously you need some social skills to pull that off without coming across as creepy but even if you open and there is a little bit of why are we talking vibe its ok because you'll both work through it if you want to talk to each other and then it dissapears. We naturally tend to attract people that we will get along with it just happens. As far as exactly what you say you should probs come up with something yourself but something as simple as : are you in XYZ class? Dude that last test murdered my brain.And now you are talking about the test mission accomplished! Then once you're in the group introduce yourself to everyone and make small talk.
If you do just want to open the group this issue here is you have to address the whole group for the first bit - which is really hard if its more than 4 people even 4 is hard and I personally am not a fan.If its less that just use the same open and go from there. Just remember to try use non committed body language so it looks like you could leave at any time - then people aren't worried about you being a burden. Also try to match the energy levels of the group - if they are super loud you must be too etc.
Skid