Communication as LTR progresses

[Lotus]

Pretty simple question, as your relationships progress does the manner of communication change.

We begin our relationships maintaining a pretty large aura of mystery around our daily lives, feelings and emotions. When we develop bonds with people naturally some of those walls come down.

Part of maintaining a successful relationship is keeping her on edge and chasing, but keeping her chasing while building the relationship feels so nuanced that I'm not always sure how keep the balance.

I'm constantly evaluating and I know I'm doing a pretty good job based on her increasing positive feedback and my text game is tight which keeps her chasing.

But emotionally as she gives more how much do I look to give back?

Could it really just be... Don't change anything

I hope this makes sense

-Lotus

 

[Zoro]

Part of maintaining a successful relationship is keeping her on edge and chasing, but keeping her chasing while building the relationship feels so nuanced that I'm not always sure how keep the balance.......

But emotionally as she gives more how much do I look to give back?

I think the answer lies in these two points. As the relationship goes on, she will want to see it progress in some way. And its important that you keep her on her toes, or in other words you don't give her so much that she knows she has you.

When I enter a relationship with a woman, I am skeptical of her. I just met her and so earns my trust, emotions and time through demonstrating the qualities I am looking for in a relationship.

I'm not sure if I can answer your question without a little more understanding of the question. But dealing with my women I look to one idea, and that is the play between masculine and feminine energies.

The feminine is like a storm (of emotions) and the masculine is like a rock (logic) in the midst of the storm. So whatever she is feeling is part of that storm and will buffet you with all sorts of emotions looking to see what the rock does. Does it crumble and submit, or stay strong in its form. If it crumbles she's baffled and disappointed (and a lot more), but if it stays strong she swoons. She's free to be feminine and rage her lovely storm.

If she starts giving you more and you give her more only because you feel like you should, you've been taken by the storm. If you give her more because you see she is compatible with you and your life and that would grow the relationship and that was your goal, that is maintaining the masculine form, the logic, the goal.

As for calibration, while I would be very aware of her emotions towards you, I wouldn't look at that as a rule of how much to give, but rather look to your goals in the relationship. This should all feel very natural and good. On paper it sounds very calculated, but in practice it's just whatever sits right with me. Again vital that you know clearly what you want, because then it's simple decisions.

By the way, this works best with feminine women since more masculine women will try to be the rock.

 

[Zoro]

Just want to add something important, which may be useful for calibration.

While there is a balance in the relationship, there is a similar one within your own balance of masculine and feminine energy. Think of the Yin and Yang symbol. The Yang white side has a little bit of black Yin in a dot. Same for the Yin having a little Yang.

Your emotions are tamed by the logic, but gives it life. A feminine woman's logic is at the whim of her sea of emotions, but gives her a sense of direction.

In the beautiful harmonious relationship of a masculine man with his femininity embraced and balanced, with a feminine woman with her masculinity embraced and balanced, they can look to each other for deeper understanding and growth.

The man's emotions can be soared and in awe of the boundless feminine storm. And the woman can be assured in her goals (which would be normally swept up in her emotions) by the man's strong leadership.

This balance within you allows you to be more intuitive (using the Yin feminine energy) which you can then filter through your masculine logic to calibrate to your woman's emotions.

This model has brought me joyful and productive relationships, and each one has been better than the last as I gain a deeper understanding of this dynamic.

Hope it does you well too!

 

[Lotus]

By the way, this works best with feminine women since more masculine women will try to be the rock.

She is extremely feminine

And its important that you keep her on her toes, or in other words you don't give her so much that she knows she has you.

Agreed, I think this is the answer I was searching for. The point I need to not lose sight of so she doesn't get too comfortable.

I know maintaining my tight texting is important, but I still need to find other ways to show it. Which I'm not 100% percent on right now, but it's something I can pinpoint some focus on.

Thanks