Complimenting clothes

[szcitizen]

Yesterday I was waiting for the metro and a cute girl was standing about 4 doors down. I walked up to her and told her "Hi! I really like your shoes. They make your professional clothing look so much more exciting." That seems pretty dumb but actually I'm translating what I said and in the original Chinese it works much better. We ended up chatting about clothes for 3 minutes while waiting for the train, and then once we got on the train she asked me what I did. I kept it short "I work in fashion," and quickly tried to get her talking about herself. However, I only had one minute since I was only going one stop. I didn't have time to exchange phone numbers so I just gave her my card. She texted me about an hour later, and I just replied that it was nice meeting her. I plan to ask her out after the weekend since I don't have time this weekend.

On to the question. What is the general take on complimenting girls on clothes and then talking about clothes? I can probably get away with this a bit more than your average guy because I really do work in fashion. However, I know it comes off as a little "gay." I actually don't really like talking about clothes but I'm able to fake it. Also a lot of my girlfriends ask my advice on clothes. Usually they will listen to my opinion over that of their other girlfriends. I'm afraid though that if I get into a conversation with a girl about a topic that she usually discusses with girls then I will be automatically placed into the friends category. I'm pretty sure the opening line is ok, but should I be making an effort to not make the whole conversation about clothes even though that is where it will naturally head?

Just as a disclaimer I am not really a "metro" guy. I dress well but I'm also pretty athletic; played college lacrosse and now I play a lot of rugby. My true passion is sports and if you ask my friends that is all I really want to talk about.

 

[Franco]

Hey szcitizen,

On to the question. What is the general take on complimenting girls on clothes and then talking about clothes?

Complimenting a girl on her clothes is fine, as long as you are complimenting the way the clothes look on her. The issue with your statement here:

"Hi! I really like your shoes. They make your professional clothing look so much more exciting."

...is that the compliment is a bit indirect, and she'll be unsure of whether or not you wanted to talk to her because of her or if you wanted to talk to her because of her clothes. If you then go on and tell her this:

"I work in fashion..."

...then she'll legitimately believe you were just interested in talking about her clothing. Now, mentioning you work in fashion is fine, but you'll want to be a little more direct when you compliment a girl on her clothing so that she knows that your intention was to compliment her. She might be a bit caught off guard when you ask her for a date (since she probably didn't feel like that's what you were after), but if your vibe was sexy and cool, and she found you attractive, then she still might accept the offer.

So with that in mind, I would go ahead and be direct with your text. Something along the lines of:

"Hey Anna, I enjoyed chatting with you yesterday... you have a great vibe and sense of style . If your schedule allows for it, how about we grab a drink/coffee sometime this week?

With this girl, you'll need to start moving more of your compliments directly on to her rather than her clothes so that she knows what it is you want. And for future approaches, it is fine to compliment her clothing, but just make sure to compliment why it looks good on her, rather than just complimenting the clothing in general. That way the girl knows that you're giving her the compliment and not the clothing.

Hope this helps!

- Franco