Creating the so important "bubble"

[MisterX]

This is an advanced topic, so keep that in mind.


You know what I mean. That moment with a girl when you share a passion and it's only you two in the whole world. Everyone is an outsider and they don't get you two. Only you two can get each other in that "bubble".

I recently had this happen to me with a girl. And it's not something that has happened much before. It's amazing and awesome. You don't need fancy lines of game, you are naturally interested in each other, you can both feel this. The conversation keeps going smoothly and passionately and you both know it's on.


I'm under the impression that this is mostly up to chance since I've approached and went out with lots of girls but I've only had this happen a couple of times.

I feel like this has to do with your biggest passions and dreams that you both share OR really emotional experience that you've both had. And it's kind of like love at first sight but not only because of physical appeal and pheromones but because of shared dream or experience.



Any suggestions how you can create this with lots of different girls that you approach?

 

[Franco]

MisterX,

This isn't something you can really "create" out of thin air. If a girl is your type, then that means it's ON and you'll just KNOW it. Conversation will flow like a river and it will seem like both of you are just hitting all the right targets with each other. Generally, when you find a girl like this, it usually means she's a potential girlfriend option (should that be what you want).

You can't really make yourself feel this way about girls -- it's simply a trait of their personality, and it either matches up with yours or it doesn't. However, that's not to say that you can't make a GIRL feel like she can connect with you on a deeper level. I'm rather socially savvy and have a high level of empathy, so even when a girl isn't saying anything that's necessarily causing "sparks" to fly, I can still say the right things to make her THINK sparks are flying. It's about being able to understand what she's saying and make connections with your own experiences to show her that you know where she's coming from. When a girl feels like you just GET her, then that's when she begins to feel a connection toward you. This is what separates the "robot" deep divers (who just ask questions without giving any thought to her answers) and the suave deep divers who can pull out her deepest emotional feelings and connect them with his own.

A similar thing happened with my current girlfriend when we first met. We met at a bar, and when we started talking to each other, it was just ON. It's like we were both born on the same planet with the same experiences and the same view on life. Conversation didn't feel forced and it just felt natural. It's a great experience -- the key is to capitalize on it. When most guys meet a girl like this, they fall HEAD OVER HEELS for her and suddenly become nice and move slowly. This is exactly the opposite of what you want to do. You want to move things extremely quickly and bed her as quickly as possible as you would any other girl before your "feelings" for her prevent you from closing the deal.

Once she's your lover, you can decide whether or not this is a relationship that you want to continue. =)

- Franco