- Joined
- Apr 6, 2014
- Messages
- 15
Stage 1: Initial Meet
Yesterday I met a cute Russian girl in a bookshop who is studying accounting. She has a fantastic body and long straight brown hair down to her waist. We chatted and I learned that she was quite amiable and playful. I got the number, then we parted ways agreeing to meet the next day. I send a follow up text and then a confirmation text before we meet at a cafe near my house.
Stage 2: The Date
We meet up, starts out rough cuz I'm trying to speak Russian and I don't speak Russian well, but then it picks up and we are getting along very well (I enjoy speaking Russian -- good practice, and also a way to differentiate myself with her from other "suitors"). We decide after some decently deep conversation (not deep dive at my usual level, as I was mostly speaking Russian, but still not bad) to go for a walk. We walk around the city, check out a record shop. At the record shop I mention that I have a record player and a record that she just has to listen to, and then while we are walking back to the cafe I invite her over in Russian. On the drive over she says she is surprised and thought we were going to just listen to music in my car (either a shit test or my Russian is worse than I thought), but regardless, she comes over and I comfort her with some light conversation. We arrive and go up to my floor of the house. I leave her in my room and then go to the bathroom. Come back and she's sitting on my bed. This was the time. I knew the clock was ticking FAST. I didn't have long to make a move, but instead I took the cowards way out and pulled out the record and put it on. She didn't like it (though I think she was just as aware as I was of the pressure for me to make a move or perish). I abort that strategy very early on by saying that I just remembered she wanted to find a book to read, so I lead her away from the music and over to the bed, where we sit down together and observe the bookshelf. She finds a book but I decide that I don't want to lend it to her, and she is a bit pouty about that (I lend out too many books and never get them back, and if I mess things up, I'm also down one book). She is making some bitchy remarks about my room being unclean and about Americans in general etc, but I generally ignore them or joke them away, recognizing them as coming just from her feeling tension for maybe being about to get laid. This is the time to act but... I hesitate. Window closes. Fuck. "Okay, but can I still save this?" I think. "Hmm, gotta try something..."
Stage 3: Going for the Rebound
I quick patch together a plan (maybe not the best one, but at least I had one): I will take her on an adventure because I need to keep the momentum going and build things back up, so I take her over towards by her house (leaving my intended closing location...) then we go for a walk to where I say we should go explore some tunnels (rather immature plan-- though it does work with some younger girls). Conversation is still good, though not deep enough and too platonic for what we need. I touch her a good bit as we talk, make excuses to touch her back and stomach when I'm demonstrating to her what lordosis behavior is, etc. We get to the entrance to the tunnel and she backs out and I let her. It's not her thing, and I didn't really think it would be. We are enjoying the walk enough that it doesn't really matter (I think we both are enjoying the conversation -- we both are learning a good bit, at the very least), though I do tease her a bit on it. All the while "I'm moving too slow!" is pumping through my brain, and my plan now is to get her to an emotional peak then invite myself over to her place.
Stage 4: Parting of Ways
We walk back to her place and linger in spots, where I can just here her mind screaming "Come ON! Take me!" but still I did not do anything (in retrospect, I should have been bold and manhandled kiss her here too). I tell her let's go up to her place, but she says "Maybe next time." (not good) and I let it slide, not wanting to press the point. We get to her place and are shooting the shit outside, conversation is dying down, so I decide to take the dive and kiss her. I pull her into me with one hand on her waste and one on her head, and plan on giving her a manhandle peck to pique her interest for another date. She is at first hesitant, uncertain, but then we actually start making out. Whoops. Probably not a good idea. There was just so much sexual tension that I think we both just wanted to release it here. Eventually we stop and I ask her if she wants to go hiking the next day, and she says no. Then I tell her we'll hang out in the evening tomorrow and she assents, though I think there was a bit of hesitancy in that. I get in my car and drive home.
Reflection
Waaaayyy to slow. It wasn't a perfect execution, but it was good enough for her -- yet I hesitated. I'm sure if I had made a move when she was in my room we would have had sex, but I was scared because if I failed it would be an awkward ride home (I was her ride) and because I'm not used to same day lays yet (rationalizations. There is no such thing as a good excuse). I need to be meeting a lot more girls -- the core of my hesitation problem is scarcity (I go on about a date a month, with about a 20% chance of getting laid and a 50% chance of pulling them home).
Attraction expired and I became too platonic. Unexceptional. I'll try to set up something for tomorrow, but I doubt it'll happen. She already knows I'm interested, and the chances that I get a second (or maybe this would be a third) chance are low.
Strategies for if we do go on a second date:
I'll invite her over to cook some pasta tomorrow. With this, do you think it would be more prudent to:
A) Manhandle kiss her the moment she walks in the door (cold)?
B) Let her get situated, eat dinner, go in my room for a movie or something, then go for the close?
C) Invite her in, show her a book, sit on the bed, and go for the close?
D) Another strategy?
The problem here is that it's going to be expected, so her defenses are going to be way up. However, she does know that I'm leaving town in a few days, so that does increase my odds. Maybe I should try something more experimental. Option A might actually have the highest chances of working -- if she comes over just going in hot. If anything, it'll at least save me some time.
-Mani
Yesterday I met a cute Russian girl in a bookshop who is studying accounting. She has a fantastic body and long straight brown hair down to her waist. We chatted and I learned that she was quite amiable and playful. I got the number, then we parted ways agreeing to meet the next day. I send a follow up text and then a confirmation text before we meet at a cafe near my house.
Stage 2: The Date
We meet up, starts out rough cuz I'm trying to speak Russian and I don't speak Russian well, but then it picks up and we are getting along very well (I enjoy speaking Russian -- good practice, and also a way to differentiate myself with her from other "suitors"). We decide after some decently deep conversation (not deep dive at my usual level, as I was mostly speaking Russian, but still not bad) to go for a walk. We walk around the city, check out a record shop. At the record shop I mention that I have a record player and a record that she just has to listen to, and then while we are walking back to the cafe I invite her over in Russian. On the drive over she says she is surprised and thought we were going to just listen to music in my car (either a shit test or my Russian is worse than I thought), but regardless, she comes over and I comfort her with some light conversation. We arrive and go up to my floor of the house. I leave her in my room and then go to the bathroom. Come back and she's sitting on my bed. This was the time. I knew the clock was ticking FAST. I didn't have long to make a move, but instead I took the cowards way out and pulled out the record and put it on. She didn't like it (though I think she was just as aware as I was of the pressure for me to make a move or perish). I abort that strategy very early on by saying that I just remembered she wanted to find a book to read, so I lead her away from the music and over to the bed, where we sit down together and observe the bookshelf. She finds a book but I decide that I don't want to lend it to her, and she is a bit pouty about that (I lend out too many books and never get them back, and if I mess things up, I'm also down one book). She is making some bitchy remarks about my room being unclean and about Americans in general etc, but I generally ignore them or joke them away, recognizing them as coming just from her feeling tension for maybe being about to get laid. This is the time to act but... I hesitate. Window closes. Fuck. "Okay, but can I still save this?" I think. "Hmm, gotta try something..."
Stage 3: Going for the Rebound
I quick patch together a plan (maybe not the best one, but at least I had one): I will take her on an adventure because I need to keep the momentum going and build things back up, so I take her over towards by her house (leaving my intended closing location...) then we go for a walk to where I say we should go explore some tunnels (rather immature plan-- though it does work with some younger girls). Conversation is still good, though not deep enough and too platonic for what we need. I touch her a good bit as we talk, make excuses to touch her back and stomach when I'm demonstrating to her what lordosis behavior is, etc. We get to the entrance to the tunnel and she backs out and I let her. It's not her thing, and I didn't really think it would be. We are enjoying the walk enough that it doesn't really matter (I think we both are enjoying the conversation -- we both are learning a good bit, at the very least), though I do tease her a bit on it. All the while "I'm moving too slow!" is pumping through my brain, and my plan now is to get her to an emotional peak then invite myself over to her place.
Stage 4: Parting of Ways
We walk back to her place and linger in spots, where I can just here her mind screaming "Come ON! Take me!" but still I did not do anything (in retrospect, I should have been bold and manhandled kiss her here too). I tell her let's go up to her place, but she says "Maybe next time." (not good) and I let it slide, not wanting to press the point. We get to her place and are shooting the shit outside, conversation is dying down, so I decide to take the dive and kiss her. I pull her into me with one hand on her waste and one on her head, and plan on giving her a manhandle peck to pique her interest for another date. She is at first hesitant, uncertain, but then we actually start making out. Whoops. Probably not a good idea. There was just so much sexual tension that I think we both just wanted to release it here. Eventually we stop and I ask her if she wants to go hiking the next day, and she says no. Then I tell her we'll hang out in the evening tomorrow and she assents, though I think there was a bit of hesitancy in that. I get in my car and drive home.
Reflection
Waaaayyy to slow. It wasn't a perfect execution, but it was good enough for her -- yet I hesitated. I'm sure if I had made a move when she was in my room we would have had sex, but I was scared because if I failed it would be an awkward ride home (I was her ride) and because I'm not used to same day lays yet (rationalizations. There is no such thing as a good excuse). I need to be meeting a lot more girls -- the core of my hesitation problem is scarcity (I go on about a date a month, with about a 20% chance of getting laid and a 50% chance of pulling them home).
Attraction expired and I became too platonic. Unexceptional. I'll try to set up something for tomorrow, but I doubt it'll happen. She already knows I'm interested, and the chances that I get a second (or maybe this would be a third) chance are low.
Strategies for if we do go on a second date:
I'll invite her over to cook some pasta tomorrow. With this, do you think it would be more prudent to:
A) Manhandle kiss her the moment she walks in the door (cold)?
B) Let her get situated, eat dinner, go in my room for a movie or something, then go for the close?
C) Invite her in, show her a book, sit on the bed, and go for the close?
D) Another strategy?
The problem here is that it's going to be expected, so her defenses are going to be way up. However, she does know that I'm leaving town in a few days, so that does increase my odds. Maybe I should try something more experimental. Option A might actually have the highest chances of working -- if she comes over just going in hot. If anything, it'll at least save me some time.
-Mani
