Daily Field Dissection

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With 2018 starting off with plateaus from 2017 and beyond, I have always been hesitant on posting a ton of field reports because I was afraid of my safety. But after seeing a board member speaking about how he was in a pickle and the GC Admin helped keep his privacy safe, I decided that it was finally time to go all in with the details.

I won't name people or give out any dangerous info, but I plan on making the field reports posted in here be so vivid that should the person involved find the post, they'll remember it as if it were 5 minutes ago.

Hopefully I'll be able to post everyday as needed so that I can get results soon.

Let the dissection begin!!!!

 

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Well, that was fast

So a week already went by and I have decided that I don't have to be as detailled in my posts as I initially intended them to be as they may take a crazy amount of time. And time is of the essence. However, I do still want to post up daily, so I'll try to keep as much info as I can.

 

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Day 1

Well, today was as good as it gets, so I suppose it’s worthy enough to be the first day post under this journal.
________________________________( `_`)______________________________________________
I decided to go to the mall to fix my bank account. So as I leave I realize that I don’t greet enough. So I decide to start doing that.

#0
As I walk out, I see a girl who I know and I greet her. I notice “brazil” on the back of her shirt and tell her “I see you just got back from brazil” to which she politely giggles. She asks me if I stay this side now (as opposed to my last year’s accommodation) I say yes. She doesn’t seem as enthusiastic as I thought she’d be. I ask where her boyfriend is and she asks me if I wanna see him. I stumble with my words but eventually tell her that I was just asking to know. Then I ask her where she lives and she says she’ll visit to talk to me some more.

Just so you know, I can’t fuck her because I’m friends with the guy.

#1
A girl walks behind me and I greet her, she greets back.
I continue walking.

#2
At school I see a girl who I met somewhere. I have no idea from where, what we spoke about, or anything about her. I just remember seeing her. She greets me and we actually have a well flowing conversation. She asks me why everybody is going to the mall and I say it’s Black Panther and that she should go. I should have said “we” but lesson learned. She says that she wants to go watch fifty shades freed.
So obviously, I am now into her.
She said some other stuff after that but I didn’t hear her as I was trying to figure out whether she was actually trying to make some sexual tension or if I was just being horny old me again. She then asked me for my numbers and I gave em to her.
So awesome. It reminds me of Veronica (my first and only lay) so much.
I went to the mall and fixed my stuff.

#3
I tried to vibe a little with the bank lady but nothing much came from it. I was sure her age would disallow us from connecting. Should have tried harder.

#4
I’m on my way home from the mall and as I get close to my apartment I see a girl ahead of me. I automatically decide not to go because her shirt from behind seemed to show too much skin and it made me think she was a ho. But I thought I’d at least greet her. A guy from behind me is walking pretty fast and seems to notice the girl as he gets close to her. I’m thinking that he’ll actually say hi because he looks like his fundamentals are on point. But he just passes her. This confuses and excites me as it means that I can go up to her and say hi. But another guy behind me is walking pretty fast. Wearing sunglasses and looking super buff, his fundamentals and fashion are all on point. He checks her out from behind and seems to like what he sees.

Then he passes too.

I decide to try talking to her. But I’ve already decided that since these guys aren’t talking, its because she’ll autoreject us all. So I wasn’t hoping for much. I just decided to greet and end it there. As I greet, she looks confused (subtly) and greets back with a smile.

The guy in sunglasses looks back and then away.

Then in 2 awkward seconds I realize that she wasn’t autorejecting, she’s just surprised. Then I ask her how she is and she says that she’s fine with a genuine smile she’s showing but holding back.

The guy in sunglasses looks back and then away.

Then I ask her where she lives and she tells me it’s the res down below. Which is next door to mine. I tell her that I wanted us to be neighbours and she giggles. Then I point out that we’re kinda sorta close enough to be neighbours and she agrees.

The guy in sunglasses looks back and then away. He’s not handling this well.

I run off afraid of messing up the good vibe.

#5
I decide to go to school so I can get ahead with my studies. Outside a classroom I see 2 girls. I know one and don’t recognize the other. I greet em both and they both reply so sweetly. Including the second one. Which I find odd. I then realize that I know the second girls as well.
(I’m quite sure that I burned through the supply of girls at this school. And am pretty afraid of meeting new girls as I might have just forgotten them. So I’ll have to work on that as well)
I make 2 jokes with them and then I bounce. Way too fast bro.

#6
As I write this post, I decide to lock a second door to the venue because the mosquitoes are waltzing in. Then a girl walks out but keeps hesitating. So I ask her if the first door is open. She says yeah. I tell her that I was asking because I want to lock this one.
She says oh and runs out. I didn’t mean for that to happen. But as I was saying that I knew that it would. Probably should have tried pushing to talk to her as she was running out.

What to take note of:

Ejecting too early. Gotta stop that habit

Getting numbers. Gotta start that habit

Girl #2

Get the ho’s are immediate losses mentality outta your head. And also the “all guys are good with and actively getting better with girls” mentality. And also the “good with girls based on their fundamentals” mentality.

Don’t be afraid of the guys in the residence. They’re not as intense sexual competitors as I thought.

Don’t be afraid of girls who show too much skin. They may be attention seekers, but they’re still approachable (which you have to do to get with any woman).

What to prioritize working on:
Get the ho’s are immediate losses mentality outta your head. And also the “all guys are good with and actively getting better with girls” mentality. And also the “good with girls based on their fundamentals” mentality.

Don’t be afraid of the guys in the residence. They’re not as intense sexual competitors as I thought.

Don’t be afraid of girls who show too much skin. They may be attention seekers, but they’re still approachable (which you have to do to get with any woman).

 

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Day 2

#0
met a girl who i'm totally crushing on at the hair salon. Pretty sure she's a 10.

I gave her my numbers after she told me she doesn't remember hers.

#1
Met girl at gate and I walked with her to taxi cab. I chase frame her and she complies

that has never happened to me before. I think Imma bang her

#2
was late to class with a girl and we kept joking on and on about it all the way there.

#3
I walked with a girl who is pretty extroverted. Could have gotten her numbers. Gave me a hug instead

#4
saw a girl whose numbers i got a few days ago. will meet up with her one day

#5 group gathering
i stood with a girl on my way to class to study. Then her friends came and there was a group there. I analyzed the group so i could find some pointers :

1. Groups are confusing
2. Everybody's doing their own thing with somebody.

 

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Back to day one

I'll try to keep this up as a habit. Though, I guess that it'll only be for as long as I remain in this no results limbo. Once I start banging and see consistent results, this will probably stop. Afterall, it seems somewhat dangerous having a constant update of my life floating around on the net. So I probably wont do this forever. But......for the sake of pussy, I'll give it everything I've got. The goal is to just be consistent. So, I'll just summarize the stuff enough to keep the general vibe and idea rolling. Perhaps then I will be able to keep up with this goal of mine.

Here goes.....
______________________________

Dear diary:

Woke up late (need to get this back to 5 AM)

Felt pretty shit coz I feel like I ain’t going anywhere seduction-wise. Took my sweet ass time to get to school. The class I’m aiming for is done and a girl gives me the heads up. I speak to her a bit. Then run off coz her friend is on the phone. See some “friends” and a girl I like chilling with a dude (noted). Speak to the friends and chill with them for a while. I only chill with them so that I can get a better understanding of group dynamics. I’m more on the sigma side in the group hierarchy. The guy you can’t get too close to because he’s sort of on the edge of the social circle.

During the second class, I chill with them again and then we end up chatting over a group assignment. Another girl who I like is in the group, but she jokingly says she’s mad at me. Exasperated I ask her why, and she says she’s not mad at me. I figure that the reason why she’s made is because round about 2 days ago, I made a joke about her having a fling with the guy. She said that I was disrespecting her, so I sent her a voicenote explaining that it wasn’t like that, and that sex isn’t really a bad thing for me. She never responded. During the group discussion, I touch her once and she tells me to stop. She’s pretty hyper during the entire meeting and she and the rest of the group ignores me pretty heavily. Eventually I just decide to do this ish on my own and compare with their answers. So I get to work.

A few minutes ago, I read Oh pry’s LR montage, and man was it inspiring as fuck. Motivates me to keep on pushing with a shit ton of enthusiasm

 

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Day 2

Update on the night before:

In my whatsapp group for a group assignment, girl A said something that got the group riled up. I couldn’t see the message because she deleted it. But the group kept saying that she was quite savage for saying it. She apologizes and Girl B says that she agrees with it. The group kept talking a few more messages, but I couldn’t see a lot of the messages since a lot of them were deleted. I could only see the few that they left behind. This left me pretty jaded and I went back to my room to sleep with the jade.

This morning, I wake up from a nightmare over some girl from high school. I’m pretty sure that I fell in love with her via the dream. But it’s okay…..love fades.

The jade hits me like a hangover and I decide to be cool when meeting with the group before handing in the assignment. Which I was. I was just a little bit cold when interacting with girl A and B, but I was cool with the rest of the members. I ended up chilling with the leftover members so that we could print and hand in the assignment. After all was said and done, I split off from them as they all had a class that I don’t have.

I went to my room and stayed there trying to harmonize a lot of thoughts I have over the dark side of women. Eventually, I had to start cleaning everything in the room. So I did, until I fell asleep.

 

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Day 3

Wake up feeling reeeeeeaaaalllly shitty. Get to class late, and a bunch of people are waiting outside. I see a girl that I like. I greet her and start a topic with her. During the conversation I keep talking to people who pass by. I was hoping that it would boost my social status, but even though it did, it felt like it prevented me from making a bubble with her. Probably should have moved her and created a more intimate feeling. Class ends and she seems just as bubbly with her friends as she did with me. There’s obviously a bit more energy, but I still feel pretty good.

We all wonder around a bit. My friend calls me and I tell her that I’m on my way. Then, a girl who I was going to start nexting talks to the girl I chilled with, and she’s giving her compliments about how beautiful she is.

I suppose that this is how women form their egos.

Anyways, I left and told my friend that I downloaded a movie she wanted. We made plans to meet up later so we could watch it. She walks away and I browse the internet a bit.

The manipulated man.

I’ll save up money for that.

I walk back to my room and I see the engaged girl and we chat a bit. It was pretty fun. I go home to hang my wet laundry, go back to find my friend, and before we watch the movie, another friend shows up who is part of this social circle of ours and we chill and talk about the royal family (of London?) and I learn a lot from them. It motivated me business wise.

After they had to leave, I went to buy some junk food and a girl shows up in line. It’s just me and her. We speak and vibe a bit and she’s pretty chatty. I consider taking her home but I know that my room’s a mess, and I don’t want her to be freaked out by it.
So she says goodbye after I’m finished walking her and we part ways.

Then I watch the movie that I was supposed to watch with the friend.

Black panther.

The characters’ mannerisms and body languages were VERY on point and it motivated me to lockdown my fundamentals. Not only that, but their air of pride got me quite interested. So I’ll see in what areas I can add that to in my life. You can tell that these guys got standards!

 

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Day 4

Went to school. On my way there, I saw a girl I know who does psych and a friend who also does it. I spoke to them expecting myself to flop as a result of me not being used to group dynamics. I feel like I did kinda well as they smiled and laughed most of the time. Although, it was probably because they’re psych students? Didn’t grab their numbers. I’m just wondering if it was because I subconsciously thought that they were psychoanalyzing me as a potential patient or something, since they do consultations on campus.

Attended class, walked around a bit as I had different things to do at various locations. As I walk, I keep bumping into the same group of friends who I feel somewhat friendly towards.Let’s call them the warming social circle. Part of this circle is a chick who I’m into. But eventually, I guess that she’s being worked on by another friend who’s part of the circle. So I think I’ll just let him get her, as I seek no trouble.

After that, my real social circle who I came from high school with (I shall refer to them as the super star force killer social circle) showed up at my room and damn, was it messy.

I really need to start keeping it clean.

They gave me some cooking advice and then left.

Afterwards, I just chilled in my room. I had officially decided that going MGTOW would be very beneficial to me in the short and long term. So doing it seemed like an option to me right now. Even if I don’t become it fully, I can just carelessly attempt to close with every women that I see and hope that it leads to sex. This way, the rejection can force me to be mgtow, while simultaneously giving me the luxury of saying that I tried. And it’ll force me to close in the first place as well.

Then veronica messages me. Apparently she needs a place to crash tomorrow.

I’m getting laid boys!!!!!!!

On my way to school to post this, I bumped into a girl who’s sort of quiet and we're chilling in the same class now. We're on opposite ends of the class and she has booty for days. My room is currently a mess, but I can just clean it up before she enters. So after posting this, I’ll just try to close and……..

Okay, she just left. So I’ll wait for another time.

All in all, tomorrow looks good. So I'll push for that.

 

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Humble bragging

Okay, so far I managed to keep up the posting. Although it wasn't consistent, it was continuous. So all I gotta do is do it consistently along with working out, studying and working. Let's do this!!!!!!

 

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Day 5

Update on last night: I realized that the reason why I had a mental block, is because I assumed that a lot of GC advice is tailor made for club game. In reality, the advice here is very versatile. So I’ll begin treating it as such.

Went to class to hand in an assignment. It was a late submission. The teacher tooled me by making me write down “-10%” onto it myself. I reclaimed a tiny bit of power by asking if I should write it down in words and people laughed. During the day, I feel free as I don’t have any assignments left. So I go home and ponder and decide that it would be best if I were to just close women willy nilly. Although, I really don’t want that reputation. But still, having the freedom would allow me to get serious with my life, and allow me to at least force my seduction skills forward. I walk around a bit more and I find and chill with the new social circle for like 5 minutes (As per normal) before breaking off.

What I learned is that one of them likes women and hunts them a lot. So this shows that PUA is a lot more common than one might think (further evidence as to why I should just move on with my life. Girls won’t miss me). There’s a party later on, so I figure that that’s why veronica needs to sleepover. She texts me saying that she’ll sleep at her friend’s crib since she’s sleeping over at a boyfriend’s. I attend the party for just a little bit and that’s where I realise that the clothes you wear are a large part of your fundamentals and is the difference between instant rejection or an instalay.

Eventually, I see veronica, and we chat. She seems so excited to see me and so am I. We have a nice convo and then I bounce as she’s also got shit to do (sneak alcohol in). I see there’s still a possibility of me getting laid this weekend, I think. But even if I’m not, I don’t mind. I need to start prioritizing my life.
Plus, I think that seeing veronica brought up a lot of emotion within me, which got me thinking that if I could fuck her as though she’s the last woman that I can fuck, and that I NEED to display my love for them through this one last act….then I can pull out some passionate sex of sensuality up in this mofo.

 

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Wifi update

I've been out of commission for a while because my laptop couldn't connect to the wifi. So I couldn't post my stalker updates. However, I have been jotting them down on my laptop's documents. So I'll just upload them, along with the corresponding day that it all happened on

Cheers!

 

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Day 6 (saturday)

Woke up in somewhat good mood. Ready to do some work. I check my phone and see that veronica tried to call me twice at 3 AM. I decide to go to campus later to check it out. So I cook, shower, clean, ETC.

While I do, my thoughts regarding the extent of the consequences of my loser seducer model (posted in my other journal in Ash’s journal)
It will probably get me cast out of society. As women will think of me as a PERVERT and other sexually abusive terms. And men will probably abandon me as well as their reputations will be on the line. So I will end up alone.

And free.

This way, I can work on all of my goals and ambitions and end up becoming legendary. Afterall, the other option is to just avoid them on my own without fucking up my reputation. But I won’t be able to go through the thrill of seduction if I were to do that. So I’ll just do it.
And since I decided to do that, it opened my mind and made me realize that closing women means giving them plausible deniability to go into my home.

Excellent.

So now I ponder what I can use to do that. On my way to school, I happily ignore women I usually talk to. Before reaching my wifi spot, I see a girl I know and her friend.I talk to her and try to get the other girl to talk. It failed because I was a bit awkward:

I asked a girl I know a question, while staring at the friend, as if I was waiting for a response for either one of them. Even though the question could only be asked by the girl I know. So the friend may have misconstrued my eye contact as attraction.

Oops.

I walk off and I check my messages and post the “field dissection” for Day 5.

 

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Day 7 (Sunday)

I wake up. Do my stuff and go to school for wifi. On my way there, a guy asks me to come to church. I tell him I can’t as I’m stressed over my studies. He urges on, but I stay firm. Then we greet each other off and I bounce. Once I get there, my wifi doesn’t connect to my computer. Frustrated, I go home in a puff.

Before I reach my room, a girl I know urges me to go to church with her. I check the time and it’s getting pretty close to church time. I decide to walk her there and we laugh along the way. As we get closer, I get more and more nervous about rejecting her, especially in front of other church members. Once I’m in, I see a girl I like. So I stay so I can sit with her.

At the end, she walks off. I help pack up some chairs and then I walk off home.

 

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Day 8 (Monday)

I only slept for an hour or something, as I binge watched an amazingly negative show called Bojack Horseman. Watched the first season up to episode 10. I relate too much to him. Sucks pretty bad.

I’m exhausted. But I have to get to school. I get there and I don’t really care for people and pickup artistry and socializing anymore. I now have a carefree attitude. So I walk straight to the social circle I was not sure of. We chat a bit. A lot. Teacher complains but we can’t help it. Once class is over, I go off to get some sleep. I miss all of my classes.

I go to school, in case I can catch the final minutes of the class, but I’m too late. So I chill with my social circle again. We walk around chatting. People splitting off. We walk off home. The entire tie, I keep trying to leave as I’m anxious to study, but a guy keeps saying
“Relax, we’re all going to study”

And this goes on until we’re almost there. Then one of them suggests that we visit a girl who’s sick. So we do. We all chat. I make some jokes and people laugh and respond well.

Then we all leave. Which is when I get home. Finally. The entire interaction was an hour or something, but still……..

I do all my cleaning and cooking. My life looks on point now. I exercise, shower, eat. By then it’s midnight and I decide to finish off that season. I try to push on into the second season but a few minutes into episode 1, I’m exhausted and I doze off.

 

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Day 9 (Tuesday)

I wake up. Should probably stop typing that. My food life seems on point. So I eat and go off to school. I get there and not a lot of people wished me happy bday. Bummer. But I get some socialising in via class and shouting out answers and talking to students around me. Always gotta keep up my socialness, otherwise I’ll lose it hard like I did my entire life. I walk off to res with the social circle I’m the outsider of. When I get home, I’m bored, so I go back to school for the wifi. I accompany a social circle that I was never a part of. And they just leave me be. It was quite surprising. Once they get to class, I turn around to start heading back to res. Which is when the married girl asks me to come over and fix her laptop. I oblige.

On my way there, a girl who I thought I could have sex with but shunned me off sees me and calls out to me and approaches me. We talk. She eventually says that she just wanted to ask for 7 bucks from me. I tell her that I don’t have. And then she shuffles off.

Was that an escalation window?

Once I get to the married girl, we start off making jokes. But eventually, she starts unloading all of her life secrets on me. I spent 3 hours with her. I try giving her the best advice that I can.

Afterwards, my mind is all over the place. Not sure if it’s because I’m into her and that’s just what happens, or if it’s because I was spinning my head everywhere trying to come up with as many solutions as possible for her. I even walked into the wrong apartment today. I have a headache.

 

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Day 10 (Wednesday)

I wake up, feeling middle aged. I feel like I may be dying of old age/ health neglecting now. Which would be a very cruel joke as I feel I’m reaching ever so closer to my goals. Day started off depressed, but still, life moves on.

Get to school and there’s no class. A girl and three guys are talking and I get there and just listen. They’re talking about homosexuality. The girl is for it, the guys are against it. During the conversation I learn that:

PEOPLE HAVE SEX IN RELATIONSHIPS FOR INTIMACY

Biggest lesson of my life.

I may need to redo my loser seducer model to accommodate this as it is a very important fact regarding how humans view relationships.
Run around during the day. Then later, when I’m at school trying to fix my laptop’s wifi, the engaged girl messages me dumping her emotions all over me. I give out some advice and dash away to my room.

I spend the day thinking over the married girl. But then I get money from my parents. So I run off to buy some much needed groceries (I really need to work on my money saving). On my way back to my room, a lot of chicks asked me if i had a TV so they could watch a soccer match. I kept saying no and running off. Should have been more social. But it's actually a good thing that I walked off as my socialising technique is still a bit childish whenever I'm struck out of autopilot. So it at least confronts me with the thought of having to upgrade my social skills when jolting out of autopilot.

I go to sleep performing my nightly ritual of Bojack horseman watching.

 

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Day 11 (Thursday)

On my way to class, I see a girl I like. I talk to her a bit and then go to class. On our way out, me and the two friends see the girl and we all chill. One of the friends grabbed her number, so I did the same. We then head off to a room of 4 dudes and we all chill as a family. Then we escort the girl to say goodbye to her. I feel like she’s dating some dude. But hey, I’ll just see what I can pull out of her.

The group the buys food (excluding me of course) and then I split off from them.

One of them notices that I always run off from the group. Wonder what I should do about that….

I wonder around aimlessly a bit before finally deciding to buy some fast food to eat.

HOWEVER:
I decide that this will be the last time. It appears that I have made comfort food (as a result of the woes of life) my drug. And so, I need to stop indulging myself as it is fucking me up financially. I need to accept that life is fucked up. And that it won’t get any better. Only worse.

After eating, a friend surprises me and we chill. She’s pretty excited and tells me that she likes me since she can let herself loose around me.

Noted.

After she leaves, I perform my nightly ritual of watching Bojack horseman.

 

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Day 12 (friday)

Wandered around school aimlessly trying to fix my laptop’s wifi. Just as I decide to go home, I see two girls that I’m friends with. I speak to them and the vibe is pretty good. I learned a lot from the interaction between them. At one point, I tried framing a girl as freaky by telling her that she looks freaky. She became self-conscious and asked her friend if she looks freaky. I started making outrageous jokes about how freaky she is and she calmed down once she realised that I was kidding all along.

I walk one of them to a bunch of cabs so she can go home and she runs off.

I really need to fuck one of them. Or at least go on a few dates and see what happens.

I bump into a friend and I tell him that I’ll come over to his church tomorrow.

Once I get home, I perform my nightly ritual of Bojack horseman. Almost done with the season. Only reason why I don't finish it tonight is because I keep texting with engaged girl. She's unloading her shit on me again. I wanna leave, but an episode of Bojack scared me, so I just keep trying to give her advice.

In the end she sends me a message that clearly shows that she respects me for how "wise" I am as a bell boy for her emotional baggage. I also message the girl I liked from yesterday, so it wasn't all bad.

I finish off some episodes and doze off.

 

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Day 13 (Saturday)

Was asleep all day from my cartoon binging. On my way to school to come up with an alternative way to post all of my stuff to the internet without wifi, I bump into church dude and tell him I couldn’t make it coz I slept late studying. He understood and invited me to come next week.


I will.

Got to school trying to force the shit outta the wifi. In the meantime, I text some people and it’s going surprisingly well. The girl from this field report even invites me over since she’s “bored”. I tell her I’ll chill a bit when I get there. And on top of that, I finally got my llaptop to connect to the frickin wifi!!!!!!!!!!
I go over and we chill a bit. She has to go visit a sick friend though. So I escort her (all the way to the door. Shouldn’t have done that).
I go off to my room and procrastinate from studying. Then I just decide to go back to school and post days 6 – 12.

Which is when the girl messages me and tells me she’s back home.

Why not?

I post my stuff and hop on over to her.
We talk about stuff and I even ate her food again. I feel like I’m getting comfortable with this. Slowly but surely.
We talk a bit more. But the later it becomes, the more I worry that she won’t be able to keep talking. I massage her feet after a massaging topic (just realized that I got some kino in there too!). She then asks me how it’s possible that women sleep with guys so easily and what my process is. I say:

Lemme show you

And I try to kiss her
She dodges it.

Aaaaarrrrggggghhhhhhhh……..

We talk a bit more and as soon as she says that she wants to lie down because she’s tired, I use the opportunity to eject. I try to kiss her one last time and surprise surprise………..I should move on with my life……..

I get home and finish off the Bojack Horseman Show. All seasons complete.

Now I feel empty.

 

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Day 14 (Sunday)

Woke up and immediately started watching vids on youtube examining the bojack horseman show.

I have a church date with the girl from last night, so i wanna get there on time. Problem is, the shower is being used and cold water is leftover. So i gotta wait for it to reheat. I binge and feel pretty empty.

After all is said and done, I'm a couple of minutes late for meeting up with the girl. I go to the room and knock on her door, no response. I walk around a bit and see the bus we were supposed to leave in. It's waiting for people. I check my phone for messages, but nothing.

Hmmmm....

I walk to my room, bummed out. She seemed so excited, yet, she flaked on me.

I'm pretty sad, so i relapse and head out to buy junk food.

After indulging my sorrows, I stumble onto a youtube video about a show I watched last year called shameless.

they were analyzing the philosophy behind the show and it amped me up as it said that the odds were stacked against the characters, and even though they fail, they still push on.

it amped me up so much that it reminded me of one of something:

life is hard. And it will beat you down. It wants to beat you down. And everyone inside of it wants to beat you down.

Get over it.

Now get up.

I have decided to live a life in which I force myself to DO EVERYTHING that needs to be done in order to get me to reach the top!

No matter how tedious, meaningless, painful, heartbreaking, disillusioning, I will do it.

And I will get there!