- Joined
- Aug 12, 2014
- Messages
- 1,982
The morning
After the gym I got a new edgy haircut from [C]. Had a great time deep diving her and getting some sexual frames in. For instance she told me a client is getting married and coming in for a lesson on how to style his newly cut hair. I asked if he was hot and then suggested he might be up for one last fling before getting hitched...hahaha...also discussed coming out of LTRs and getting back in the saddle...overall a fair bit of fun was had, she isn't totally my cup of tea looks wise, but I decided I really like her personality and that she needs some solid dick to get over her LTR so I asked her to put her number on a card for me and she did. Will have to see what happens there. The only bad thing about this is that some of the other girls who work there are pretty hot, one of them runs a home salon during the week which I'm planning to try. Still I feel [C] is the most receptive, and a bird in the hand as they say.
The missus
So then I met for a coffee and I must admit I didn't treat her totally well, she was premenstrual and horny and I should have taken her home and given her the dick immediately, but I was kind of wanting to keep my edge for the evening, also was pretty anxious to get my errands done and get to work. I also used her as an emotional tampon in regards to some family problems I've been having lately (she knows the context from pre GC days so it was more of an update if anything). In retrospect I feel bad about the whole scenario and I would do things differently. She wanted to come over in the evening but I had to say to give me more warning and I'd keep it free for her.
The stereo
Well I had to get some sound happening in my ride for the night's date at the drive-in, so I called into the stereo shop and got the inexpensive head unit and speakers that I'd selected online the night before. The installers weren't working that day, and it was a total bitch to install, but with a few inventive shortcuts and lots of electrical tape I got it done in an hour or two. In the process I flattened my battery, which was a fucking pain in the erse, but I got everything sorted by 13.00, horrendously late for work by this stage. Lucky my hours are flexible. Went into the city and called in at my favourite car wash for a serious treatment inside and out. While I waited I made some calls to arrange to look at city apartments later in the week, and got some solid tinder flirting in as well (I discovered tinder last night after reading RDawg's report on the tinder vampire, more about this later haha).
While waiting I also got an interesting text from a different [L] who I'd been dancing with during bar and club game 2 days earlier. Had abandoned her when she started getting too into party mode with her 2 friends and she texted me apologizing for this. Not becoming an orbiter was definitely the right move there. Will have to see what happens with this one. Not totally what I'm into, a bit oldish and a workaholic apparently, but she seems to be down so maybe worth a booty call. Tight body as I recall.
The date
Did a little work at the office and ordered the tickets online for the drive in, chose something pretty scary to watch, in hopes there'd be a bit of kino. See
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=8096
Had been texting [L] on and off because she wanted to pull out of the date as she'd forgotten her wallet and felt bad about having no money. She seemed genuine, so I told her she'd have to pay for the 3rd date and I would handle things tonight. And that this would be a good arrangement since she'd be paying for the hotel room in that case. Haha. Eventually we were go.
Met her at the tram stop and I must say she looked fucking gorgeous, made me remember why I cold approached her and direct opened her in the first place...she was wearing a fitted black summer dress and sandals with a bit of mesh happening around the tits and showing a fair bit of cleavage...yum yum...had done her hair and face super nicely too...I told her she looked absolutely gorgeous and repeated this as we walked to the car. After we got in the car I squeezed her knee affectionately as I told her how sexy she looked (I wanted to mention sex ASAP since my sexual framing was not on point, in fact virtually nonexistent, during the first date). She pushed my hand away, laughing in an embarrassed way. This was a bit concerning. I said I was just being affectionate and we discussed about differing cultural expectations. I said we should return to this topic over dinner for a proper discussion.
I kept the conversation pretty light on the way to the restaurant, just sprinkled in a few mentions of hot guys, dating, sex, and so on. Also I got her to correct my Vietnamese accent so I could order in the restaurant, made some solid progress with dotted (broken) tones which I'm happy about. In the restaurant I started asking her about her expectations with dating guys, relationships etc, things were fairly promising as she mentioned she had come here to study abroad to get away from strict controlling family and establish some freedom, even if she's now living with her aunt and basically in the same boat as before. She did admit that she holds pretty traditional attitudes however. So I asked her if she was envisaging a traditional date->marriage kind of scenario, explaining that I wanted to have fun with her and enjoy her company and become intimate but without all that seriousness, she agreed she was into that. Game on! I want to thank Chase here for helping me with my earlier mistakes with another Asian hotty (NEXTed) and helping me to listen and reflect what she wants instead of just coming across as a player.
Slight setback on paying the bill, I gave her some cash and told her to go and pay and bring me the change (this is a technique I use a lot, since I'm paying for smaller items, but I want to at least get some compliance in return). She refused compliance and I persisted a bit because I didn't want to look weak. Eventually I realized it might be a cultural issue so decided to go and pay, after practicing the necessary Vietnamese words with her. This went great actually, the restaurant staff were very impressed. Hmm. Guess I'm in the boyfriend zone anyway, it goes with the territory I think. I remember a post from Chase saying that in chase-framing conservative Asian women you should sometimes stick to implying they're chasing you as boyfriend or they can get pretty offended, so I think Chase is probably on the same page as I am in dealing with these kind of situations (also about date compression).
So then we went to the drive-in, it's in an industrial area and I think [L] was getting a bit antsy, wondering where I was taking her, especially as I'd implied the cinema would be pretty different than what she's used to, but luckily it was signposted as we got off the main road so she relaxed a little after that. I should have given her the tickets to hold earlier, but anyway, I got them out and I had her show them to the guy (starting to build compliance).
As we waited for the film we set up a pretty relaxed vibe, chatting about this and that, sharing the headphones to listen to each other's music, etc. I inserted a little deep diving without being intense about it, asking her about her high school when she discussed a performance she'd given. I discovered a gold mine there, she went to a pretty strict and expensive school and constantly got in trouble, being sent to the headmaster's office and so on, which invited a whole a lot of sexual framing about bad and naughty [L] and the spankings she would receive and so forth. Also I discovered that she's a biter, apparently she has had one boyfriend before and gave him a bit of a hard time. I had just read RDawg's experience last night, and thought, oh no, so I told her pretty sternly that if she wanted to be bitten I would be OK with that, but if she tried it on with me she would be spanked pretty hard.
So then I tried for a bit more compliance, telling her to hold my hand which she refused. Fuck, it was looking like it would be an uphill battle here. I told her that this sounded like good [L] speaking and I prefer bad [L]. Luckily matters improved, although not straightaway. The movie was pretty boring at first, quite dialogue driven too, which shit me due to my hearing aids and the lack of subtitles at the drive in. So I was sitting there quite bored and wondering how the fuck I was going to escalate, I also had a minor coughing fit (I've had a cold recently) and so I went over to get us some drinks, and take a slash, and reconsider my strategy.
Now the movie started to get good. In the first scary scene I said [L], hold my hand, so that we can experience this scary movie *together*, and wonder of wonders she started complying! Great stuff! Various configurations of handholding followed, which felt great as she was tracing up and down and doing little circles around my fingers and so on, occasionally letting go but grabbing on again when the movie got intense. I started to caress her hair a bit, but she wasn't at all down with that, and cooled off temporarily, saying that this would lead to sex and...so I explained that I wanted to give her an enjoyable experience, and that if she had an enjoyable experience she would be the winner, but she had to let me do so. I think this came off non-needy. I also had her unbutton my cuff and start caressing my arm, and later transferred her hand over into my lap and this was also a big step forward.
This was as far as it went unfortunately, because we were both concentrating on the movie (more so her) but overall I was pretty happy with getting to that stage considering how bleak things were before. As the movie finished I suggested we play around a little, she was clearly down but held back by programming...
I tried for a bit more compliance as well, pointing to my cheek and telling her to kiss it but this also didn't fly. She did say repeatedly that she felt totally relaxed and comfortable with me however. I praised her for this and for how she had accepted the physical contact despite this being counter to her programming. I said we could continue her training later
The take home
She then said she wanted to go home. I said that by the time we finished her training she'd be staying out all night clubbing with me and she laughed, I persisted by saying that the first date finished at 8pm and the second date at 9pm so it would be 10pm next time. She was OK with being dropped at the station but as I'd said I'd drive her home I did so (a fair drive but since we were in northern suburbs already, as planned, it wasn't too bad). On the way she explained that having been cold approached and knowing little about me, especially in the context that she doesn't know my country well (5 months only) she was pretty nervous about things, but she felt great now.
I'm glad I didn't act like a dick and force escalation because it would have been the wrong thing to do here, building comfort is the ticket it seems. Slow fucking going but I think she will be worth it, she was actually quite awkward and uncomfortable and acting difficult on the first date, but second date was a completely different story, I had a great time with her and I think she might be girlfriend material possibly. Now that I understand her likes and preferences a bit better, she has barely used the word "no", I only had to tease her with the "no girl" nickname once when she refused my escalation. She laughed and accused me of being "yes man", I'm not sure if she realized how funny this is in an English language context, but her English is amazing, she's been studying for 5 months and she understood the movie a lot better than me. And if it sounds like she is tooling and controlling me with this slow escalation scenario, well I don't think so. She is pretty genuine and direct about things and I've repeatedly praised her for this, saying that from the first text message she sent me, I knew we'd get along fabulously.
On the way home I ordered her to choose a restaurant or an activity which she likes and which is in her price range, and to take me to it and pay for it. She's down. And miracle of miracles she accepted my order to kiss me on the cheek before running off inside before I could return the favour. Haha. I think she reaches a peak of anxiety at the end of the date knowing she'll be expected to do something physical, this happened last time too, so I was ready with the order before she could escape. Haha.
I decided to reward her for her progress with the following text:
Overall this was a pretty fun and instructive experience, although it's not LR #1 unfortunately. Without GC I would never have approached, and if I'd somehow fumbled my way into the date, I would never have had a plan for escalation, and would have either fucked it up by being awkward or overdoing things, or would have just sat in the car uncomfortably separate and watching our time together dribble away. Thanks studs.
cheers, Ray
After the gym I got a new edgy haircut from [C]. Had a great time deep diving her and getting some sexual frames in. For instance she told me a client is getting married and coming in for a lesson on how to style his newly cut hair. I asked if he was hot and then suggested he might be up for one last fling before getting hitched...hahaha...also discussed coming out of LTRs and getting back in the saddle...overall a fair bit of fun was had, she isn't totally my cup of tea looks wise, but I decided I really like her personality and that she needs some solid dick to get over her LTR so I asked her to put her number on a card for me and she did. Will have to see what happens there. The only bad thing about this is that some of the other girls who work there are pretty hot, one of them runs a home salon during the week which I'm planning to try. Still I feel [C] is the most receptive, and a bird in the hand as they say.
The missus
So then I met
The stereo
Well I had to get some sound happening in my ride for the night's date at the drive-in, so I called into the stereo shop and got the inexpensive head unit and speakers that I'd selected online the night before. The installers weren't working that day, and it was a total bitch to install, but with a few inventive shortcuts and lots of electrical tape I got it done in an hour or two. In the process I flattened my battery, which was a fucking pain in the erse, but I got everything sorted by 13.00, horrendously late for work by this stage. Lucky my hours are flexible. Went into the city and called in at my favourite car wash for a serious treatment inside and out. While I waited I made some calls to arrange to look at city apartments later in the week, and got some solid tinder flirting in as well (I discovered tinder last night after reading RDawg's report on the tinder vampire, more about this later haha).
While waiting I also got an interesting text from a different [L] who I'd been dancing with during bar and club game 2 days earlier. Had abandoned her when she started getting too into party mode with her 2 friends and she texted me apologizing for this. Not becoming an orbiter was definitely the right move there. Will have to see what happens with this one. Not totally what I'm into, a bit oldish and a workaholic apparently, but she seems to be down so maybe worth a booty call. Tight body as I recall.
The date
Did a little work at the office and ordered the tickets online for the drive in, chose something pretty scary to watch, in hopes there'd be a bit of kino. See
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=8096
Had been texting [L] on and off because she wanted to pull out of the date as she'd forgotten her wallet and felt bad about having no money. She seemed genuine, so I told her she'd have to pay for the 3rd date and I would handle things tonight. And that this would be a good arrangement since she'd be paying for the hotel room in that case. Haha. Eventually we were go.
Met her at the tram stop and I must say she looked fucking gorgeous, made me remember why I cold approached her and direct opened her in the first place...she was wearing a fitted black summer dress and sandals with a bit of mesh happening around the tits and showing a fair bit of cleavage...yum yum...had done her hair and face super nicely too...I told her she looked absolutely gorgeous and repeated this as we walked to the car. After we got in the car I squeezed her knee affectionately as I told her how sexy she looked (I wanted to mention sex ASAP since my sexual framing was not on point, in fact virtually nonexistent, during the first date). She pushed my hand away, laughing in an embarrassed way. This was a bit concerning. I said I was just being affectionate and we discussed about differing cultural expectations. I said we should return to this topic over dinner for a proper discussion.
I kept the conversation pretty light on the way to the restaurant, just sprinkled in a few mentions of hot guys, dating, sex, and so on. Also I got her to correct my Vietnamese accent so I could order in the restaurant, made some solid progress with dotted (broken) tones which I'm happy about. In the restaurant I started asking her about her expectations with dating guys, relationships etc, things were fairly promising as she mentioned she had come here to study abroad to get away from strict controlling family and establish some freedom, even if she's now living with her aunt and basically in the same boat as before. She did admit that she holds pretty traditional attitudes however. So I asked her if she was envisaging a traditional date->marriage kind of scenario, explaining that I wanted to have fun with her and enjoy her company and become intimate but without all that seriousness, she agreed she was into that. Game on! I want to thank Chase here for helping me with my earlier mistakes with another Asian hotty (NEXTed) and helping me to listen and reflect what she wants instead of just coming across as a player.
Slight setback on paying the bill, I gave her some cash and told her to go and pay and bring me the change (this is a technique I use a lot, since I'm paying for smaller items, but I want to at least get some compliance in return). She refused compliance and I persisted a bit because I didn't want to look weak. Eventually I realized it might be a cultural issue so decided to go and pay, after practicing the necessary Vietnamese words with her. This went great actually, the restaurant staff were very impressed. Hmm. Guess I'm in the boyfriend zone anyway, it goes with the territory I think. I remember a post from Chase saying that in chase-framing conservative Asian women you should sometimes stick to implying they're chasing you as boyfriend or they can get pretty offended, so I think Chase is probably on the same page as I am in dealing with these kind of situations (also about date compression).
So then we went to the drive-in, it's in an industrial area and I think [L] was getting a bit antsy, wondering where I was taking her, especially as I'd implied the cinema would be pretty different than what she's used to, but luckily it was signposted as we got off the main road so she relaxed a little after that. I should have given her the tickets to hold earlier, but anyway, I got them out and I had her show them to the guy (starting to build compliance).
As we waited for the film we set up a pretty relaxed vibe, chatting about this and that, sharing the headphones to listen to each other's music, etc. I inserted a little deep diving without being intense about it, asking her about her high school when she discussed a performance she'd given. I discovered a gold mine there, she went to a pretty strict and expensive school and constantly got in trouble, being sent to the headmaster's office and so on, which invited a whole a lot of sexual framing about bad and naughty [L] and the spankings she would receive and so forth. Also I discovered that she's a biter, apparently she has had one boyfriend before and gave him a bit of a hard time. I had just read RDawg's experience last night, and thought, oh no, so I told her pretty sternly that if she wanted to be bitten I would be OK with that, but if she tried it on with me she would be spanked pretty hard.
So then I tried for a bit more compliance, telling her to hold my hand which she refused. Fuck, it was looking like it would be an uphill battle here. I told her that this sounded like good [L] speaking and I prefer bad [L]. Luckily matters improved, although not straightaway. The movie was pretty boring at first, quite dialogue driven too, which shit me due to my hearing aids and the lack of subtitles at the drive in. So I was sitting there quite bored and wondering how the fuck I was going to escalate, I also had a minor coughing fit (I've had a cold recently) and so I went over to get us some drinks, and take a slash, and reconsider my strategy.
Now the movie started to get good. In the first scary scene I said [L], hold my hand, so that we can experience this scary movie *together*, and wonder of wonders she started complying! Great stuff! Various configurations of handholding followed, which felt great as she was tracing up and down and doing little circles around my fingers and so on, occasionally letting go but grabbing on again when the movie got intense. I started to caress her hair a bit, but she wasn't at all down with that, and cooled off temporarily, saying that this would lead to sex and...so I explained that I wanted to give her an enjoyable experience, and that if she had an enjoyable experience she would be the winner, but she had to let me do so. I think this came off non-needy. I also had her unbutton my cuff and start caressing my arm, and later transferred her hand over into my lap and this was also a big step forward.
This was as far as it went unfortunately, because we were both concentrating on the movie (more so her) but overall I was pretty happy with getting to that stage considering how bleak things were before. As the movie finished I suggested we play around a little, she was clearly down but held back by programming...
I tried for a bit more compliance as well, pointing to my cheek and telling her to kiss it but this also didn't fly. She did say repeatedly that she felt totally relaxed and comfortable with me however. I praised her for this and for how she had accepted the physical contact despite this being counter to her programming. I said we could continue her training later The take home
She then said she wanted to go home. I said that by the time we finished her training she'd be staying out all night clubbing with me and she laughed, I persisted by saying that the first date finished at 8pm and the second date at 9pm so it would be 10pm next time. She was OK with being dropped at the station but as I'd said I'd drive her home I did so (a fair drive but since we were in northern suburbs already, as planned, it wasn't too bad). On the way she explained that having been cold approached and knowing little about me, especially in the context that she doesn't know my country well (5 months only) she was pretty nervous about things, but she felt great now.
I'm glad I didn't act like a dick and force escalation because it would have been the wrong thing to do here, building comfort is the ticket it seems. Slow fucking going but I think she will be worth it, she was actually quite awkward and uncomfortable and acting difficult on the first date, but second date was a completely different story, I had a great time with her and I think she might be girlfriend material possibly. Now that I understand her likes and preferences a bit better, she has barely used the word "no", I only had to tease her with the "no girl" nickname once when she refused my escalation. She laughed and accused me of being "yes man", I'm not sure if she realized how funny this is in an English language context, but her English is amazing, she's been studying for 5 months and she understood the movie a lot better than me. And if it sounds like she is tooling and controlling me with this slow escalation scenario, well I don't think so. She is pretty genuine and direct about things and I've repeatedly praised her for this, saying that from the first text message she sent me, I knew we'd get along fabulously.
On the way home I ordered her to choose a restaurant or an activity which she likes and which is in her price range, and to take me to it and pay for it. She's down. And miracle of miracles she accepted my order to kiss me on the cheek before running off inside before I could return the favour. Haha. I think she reaches a peak of anxiety at the end of the date knowing she'll be expected to do something physical, this happened last time too, so I was ready with the order before she could escape. Haha.
I decided to reward her for her progress with the following text:
Me: I'm home now..i had a lot of laughs with you..feel good. good luck with your test. we can complete your training soon
[L]: Yes. Me too. Thanks. Good night
Overall this was a pretty fun and instructive experience, although it's not LR #1 unfortunately. Without GC I would never have approached, and if I'd somehow fumbled my way into the date, I would never have had a plan for escalation, and would have either fucked it up by being awkward or overdoing things, or would have just sat in the car uncomfortably separate and watching our time together dribble away. Thanks studs.
cheers, Ray
