Dealing with "Maybe"

[NarrowJ]

Met this HB9 at a company function that was held at a bar/restaurant about a week and a half ago. I thought she was with our company, but turns out she was just there with a couple friends. I merely number closed, since we both had to work early the next day.


First text message convo (April 24):

Me (10:14 AM): Hey Cassandra! Hope your morning is going well Let's grab a coffee or a bite to eat this week
Her (10:20 AM): Sure maybe sometime just let me know when u available!
Me (10:30 AM): I'm pretty available the next week or so. I could do Saturday afternoon? If that doesn't work for you then maybe early next week?
Her (10:38 AM): I can't next week Saturday, I'm going out of town, maybe weekdays if u available
Me (10:50 AM): Oh- I meant this Saturday... not next Saturday. When exactly are you going to be out of town? <-- A bit confused by her wording "next week Saturday"

No response on that. I give her like 4 days radio silence and send the following text this morning:

Me: Hey Cassandra, Hope you had a good weekend! What's your schedule like this week? Let's grab a bite to eat or something
Her (immediately): Maybe Thursday



So, I know this one would be an uphill battle, if not impossible. Anyway, just wanting to learn something here more than anything.

I obviously didn't work the first conversation to my advantage. She asked *ME* when *I* was available. I should have deflected, and turned it back around. I still find that I don't think about texts before I send them. I really need to break this habit.

She's pretty hot, but possibly also not even worth my time. I think about it this way- if you asked your buddy to meet you for drinks on monday because you wanted to talk about something and he said "maybe..." how the hell would you react? It's an insult, not an answer.

If there's any response to her "Maybe Thursday" whatsoever, I'd like to hear (well read) them. I would guess it involves some kind of ball-busting + forcing clarity, but I'm at a loss on this one. I've looked all over this site and a couple other sites like RSDNation and it seems most advice is to delete the # and tell her to take a hike.

 

[devlish]

She's a girl, girls are cute and silly so don't let it aggravate you. Give her a final time for meeting up, if she's disinterested it's time for the #delete

 

[NarrowJ]

Eh, not aggravated. It's just that, with a solid 9 like this girl- I tend to try any way possible to get them out. If she were an 8 or below, I'd just write her off immediately.

As Tyme2k says, he "burns them to the ground", meaning that he will get some solid response one way or another. He doesn't let them play games like this. Just looking for some advice on how to do this.

 

[Tyme2k]

I think you're fine. Solidify that thursday meet. If you're going to burn it down do it right at least lol.

I think your texts need to convey you're scarce/busy, it seems you're very open and there's nothing occupying your time. BEST thing to do if you don't set a date, naturally screen for logistics, find out if she partakes in evening events, what her work schedule is like, this way when she asks when you're free you can state a time or two where your information you gathered led to an edicated guess of when she will also be free.

Set that meet and OFFER something this way she will ablidge and chances of flake will be less likely. Something fun. Once you get her out I know you'll be fine, I've read your LR's.

 

[NarrowJ]

Solidify that thursday meet. If you're going to burn it down do it right at least lol.

Lol yeah that's kind of what I still need to learn, is how to burn it down the RIGHT way.

Here's how I responded: "Great. How's 6 PM (Thursday) then?"

So I basically just responded to her text as if the word maybe wasn't even there. LOL


EDIT - Probably shouldnt have even worried about this one. She just confirmed for Thursday @ 6 PM

 

[Humay]

I have had experiences with girls who keep saying 'Maybe' and it's really, really annoying, i know. But as far as i know, they're just playing with you.

Just one other thing, don't suggest dates. Tell her that you've arranged a date for Thursday, and she'll tell you if she can't make it. Girls love it when you take the initiative (apparently)