FR Dietary Habits of the (un)common beach-goer

[Kvothe]

Note: This FR actually took place on 2/24, but I had waited on posting it in case the girl came on a date 2-she did not.

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Went out to the beach post work and post meditation. I found a girl sitting a little further away from the shore, but asked her to watch my stuff. As I walked away, I heard another guy ask her to watch his stuff too. I went and chilled in the water for a minute or so, and then walked back.

She didn’t initially bite into my conversation, but I persisted, switching from a very innocuous opener, to more situational stuff. I eventually get her to hook-one of the benefits of beach/stationary game is the ability to be more persistent in getting to the hook point, without coming across as try-hard.

After a short amount of talking, the other guy from before comes back, and I, based off his body language and my own bad observation skills, assume he is her friend, so I let him join the conversation. This results in him having a long-winded debate with my girl about a subject I don’t care about in the slightest. I honestly consider leaving the set, but I have a feeling this girl is going to be insta-dateable, and I also feel that I can definitely build up the attraction.

I mostly just sit, looking stoic and calm, while they discuss and debate the topic. Eventually, he grabs her number, then pretends to grab my number, and then he leaves. I use this to start building up a strong conversation with my girl again, and on a high point, suggest we get away from the cold to go to a bar and sit there instead.

We walk to the bar, trading stories, and reach the bar. Here I have a few interesting bits of conversation. I sexualized it a bit, talking about the different kinds of connections people have with each other, contrasting myself from the guy on the beach who I alluded to as a person you can debate and feel like a strong friend. I was focusing on using linking statements to link exciting, arousing feelings to myself. I also add in some sexual-tinged stories, such as being woken up by women orgasming while in a public hostel, as well as talking about how relationships when stale also have the sex being stale, and how this is one of the benefits of casual sex. She buys into this frame.

At some point in the conversation, she breaks the touch barrier and grabs my arm while telling a story, and holds it for a good amount of time before letting go.

I do try to seed the pull, but this girl doesn’t actually drink or do anything that I have at the apartment (in fact she has one of the strangest, most limiting diets I've ever heard of). I do still try to pull a bit, but pussyfoot around it a little bit. We don’t end up at my apartment, and she says she needs to go grab a bus home. I think the lack of conviction when trying to pull is what caused me to fail here.

 

[foggy]

Here I have a few interesting bits of conversation. I sexualized it a bit, talking about the different kinds of connections people have with each other, contrasting myself from the guy on the beach who I alluded to as a person you can debate and feel like a strong friend.

im curious about your speak of connection

i make good use of connection as a topic in my sets, and im planning to expand it even more since it works so well

can you explain more on how it goes for you and any findings or bits that really resonate? i am seeing that you are contrasting a friendship connection with a romantic/sexual connection here.

for me its like yadda yadda, being on the same wavelength and sharing a deeper level understanding with someone when you first meet them, contrasting it against a connection that builds over time, and then to really sexualize i transition to the topic of chemistry ie how connection is a part of romantic/sexual chemistry along with excitement and sensuality.

probably gonna do something along the lines of advising her on how to open herself up to greater, more fulfilling connections, make myself more of an authority on it..or talking about poly relationships and balancing connections between 3+ people

 

[pancakemouse]

I'll say this for a second time: if you are serious about improvement, I really, really think you need to record your dates and send them to someone, even if it's just to one trusted wing or mentor. There's so much missing that can't be conveyed through text: tonality, vibe, body language, tension...

I've just finished helping two guys from another forum whom I had previously only read text reports from. One guy I met in person and shadowed him doing daygame for a day. Another guy I listened to a date recording. In both cases I identified sticking points that no one else in any forum reply was able to pinpoint.

 

[Kvothe]

im curious about your speak of connection

i make good use of connection as a topic in my sets, and im planning to expand it even more since it works so well

can you explain more on how it goes for you and any findings or bits that really resonate? i am seeing that you are contrasting a friendship connection with a romantic/sexual connection here.

for me its like yadda yadda, being on the same wavelength and sharing a deeper level understanding with someone when you first meet them, contrasting it against a connection that builds over time, and then to really sexualize i transition to the topic of chemistry ie how connection is a part of romantic/sexual chemistry along with excitement and sensuality.

probably gonna do something along the lines of advising her on how to open herself up to greater, more fulfilling connections, make myself more of an authority on it..or talking about poly relationships and balancing connections between 3+ people

Sure, I don't think anything I use is original-but I'm not sure which article it comes from (I believe from Bacchus, but not sure)

Me: You know how when you meet someone it can go in so many different ways? Like they can be creepy, touching you in a way that makes you just want them to get the fuck away <I use this to sarcastically touch them in negative ways, which always makes the girl laugh, and breaks touch barrier>? Or they can be like this connection, where you know they'll be friends for life? And then sometimes, you feel this immediate spark, and chemistry between the two of you... and the more you experience it, the more you want to explore this connection to the fullest.

Or at least something similar to that. I usually don't go deeper than that, and will use different topics to go into other sex talk. I mostly use this piece to break touch barrier, to set a frame that this interaction is the last of the listed items.

 

[Kvothe]

I'll say this for a second time: if you are serious about improvement, I really, really think you need to record your dates and send them to someone, even if it's just to one trusted wing or mentor. There's so much missing that can't be conveyed through text: tonality, vibe, body language, tension...

I've just finished helping two guys from another forum whom I had previously only read text reports from. One guy I met in person and shadowed him doing daygame for a day. Another guy I listened to a date recording. In both cases I identified sticking points that no one else in any forum reply was able to pinpoint.

I truly appreciate the advice man. I understand what you're suggesting, and totally understand how audio would help by letting others hear the date and see some of those sticking points. But it's not something I'm willing to do at this time.